It's April 2013, the time is now & HERE ARE OUR BABIES!

[toobreathless]

Our first post natal thread!

Cooking & Cleaning can wait till tomorrow
for children grow up we've learnt to our sorrow
So wipe away cobwebs and dust go to sleep
I'm cuddling my baby cause babies don't keep!

A thread to celebrate the highs of life with a gorgeous newborn and the lows of sleepless nights, stitches, feeding traumas & Baby blues.

[ratbagcatbag]

Back from drs with an emergency paeditrician referral for reflux to get some serious meds to control it, also ordered a sleep wedge to be delivered tomorrow which I think will help. :)

[ElliesWellies]

Hi all,

Completely new to this thread but have been reading through - many congratulations to you all on your new babies.

Had DD on 3rd April, also have 2 y.o. DS, finding the juggling act really hard! Luckily DD is a star really, she does cluster feed but then has good stretches of sleep, often 4 hours at a time. Long may it last, though I fear it won't... By some miracle they are both napping at the same time, right now.

Anyone got any good tips for occupying toddler whilst breastfeeding? Mine is over-enthusiastic, which is lovely and he loves to give her kisses etc, but I keep having to fend him off a little as I'm worried he'll hurt her.

[bunnygirl80]

Yay sneezy, hope the transfer home goes well. And well done on the feeding, that's impressive

ratbag good news about the referral. Hope dd gets sorted soon.

ellie welcome to the thread! My dd arrived on 23rd March (although she was due in April!) and my DS is almost 2.5. I'm a bad bad mother and I bought him a load of DVDs to watch while I'm feeding. I've also developed the ability to walk and feed at the same time so I can get up and pass him toys if he does decide he wants to play. My final trick is that he eats around every three hours, and dd feeds every 3-4, so I wake dd to feed her when DS is having a snack or his lunch. I try and eat something at the same time too, so we're all fed and happy and ready to play once she finishes the feed. I'm very lucky that she naturally goes that long between feeds though

[Mama1980]

Yay sneezy and Henry
Glad you saw the gp ratbag and hope things improve.
Alex is still fine thank goodness, he loved laying about in the garden in the sunshine today. He is massively cluster feeding which i Am encouraging on the drs advice, my antibodies are his best defence again catching chicken pox.
My poor breasts are bashed Up though, months of pumping and then hungry boy=pain! If anyone has any suggestions I'd be grateful, nipples are pretty swollen though the cuts have healed.

[Mama1980]

Welcome Ellie, glad to have you join us I was due the 1stf April but ds arrived at 24 weeks, we got home just ver two weeks ago. Also have a dd14 and a ds5 (just) I have found ds really interested n 'helping' fetch me pillows etc when breast feeding, i also try to read to him/ hear him read at the same time, maybe that could work? X

[ElliesWellies]

Thanks bunnygirl - yes have to admit there is an awful lots of CBeebies on in this house at the moment! Funny you say about the walking and feeding - I could never do it with DS but have suddenly developed the ability with DD. Good idea re: all eating at the same time.

Gosh Mama1980, 24 weeks, glad you are now home ok and congratulations. DS is often very helpful too, but as he is only 2 it tends to alternate with doing very unhelpful things! I will try and get him on the sofa with a stack of books and see how it goes.

[num3onway]

My ds aged 3 has learnt nearly every song off cbeebies now

[ElliesWellies]

Haha, mine too. I keep hearing snippets while he is playing with his toys, e.g. a random 'dishes and spoons, splish splash splosh'. Ten points if you can name the programme!

[num3onway]

Oh god no I block it out. Ds likes the monkey thing and Mr tumble who I find creepy but not sure why!

[birdbrain17]

just marking my place so I can join in the fun on this thread also now that I have my precious little girl will read the thread when I have time! x

[BonaDea]

On the swaddle point - I do!

And find it definitely helps DS get into a deeper sleep. For the first time last night I also played him white noise - surprisingly loud - and he slept brilliantly and in the co sleeper instead of on me. A friend recommended the technique and I have to say it worked brilliantly. Of course I had to listen to the babbling brook all night too but hey...

[HadALittleFaithBaby]

Hi all, a quick update from me. We've had a very long day but I do believe with the help of nipple shields Faithlet has cracked breast feeding! She was started at 8am then had a cluster feed and was on/off every 20-40 mins for about 4 hours! Then she had a good feed so I got DH to settle her and we both slept (ah sleep, how I missed you!). Only problem I've had is settling her in the cot. She did with DH when he held her for an hour first! So she's just fed for 20 mins and I'm hoping if I cuddle her for ages she will settle, otherwise I'm handing her to the staff!

[HadALittleFaithBaby]

Oops pressed too soon then got distracted feeding!59

Welcome Ellies! Our ante-natal thread was busy but things are steadier on here as more babies emerge!

[ratbagcatbag]

Yey well done faithlet
Hello Ellie, boy we can natter in here, we also have a fb group,if you wish to be outed and come see pics, some are on it, others aren't, no worries either way :)
Just checking in as done a feed,DH in DSS bed tonight, obv DSS at his mums else that would be a tight squeeze, so mini rat is able to sprawl as madam requires and my arm under her head helps her with the reflux. This means, wait for it, I got two hours sleep before bed when DH had dd, then from 10 until 12 with dd uninterrupted, as she's just doing the sitting up for another five mins I'm hoping for another hour. Yey!!

Just a quick opinion, visited childminder tonight, I absolutely love them ,they're New, only started in jan, but as soon as I walked in they just wanted snuggles with dd, sod my interaction with us and every vibe I got was good, should I just go with them ,or compare others? I've had phone conversations with several, but not arranged meetings with others as they just haven't felt right. As dd will be five months when i leave her I just want someone who's going to love and cuddle her in my absence, I'm not bothered about the other stuff!!

[Giddypants]

Welcome Ellie x

Well I saw the gp yesterday, she said it wasn't infected but really badly sewn and that is why it's still leaking. She has prescribed me anti-biotics but said not to take them unless it starts oozing with pus, or I feel systemically unwell.
I had coffee morning with some friends from work yesterday, one girl has had a baby 7 weeks before ds2 and said that her wound had only just healed last week! So I may be in for a long haul with it

Does anyone else not have the ability to put their baby down? I just want to cuddle him all the time, or maybe it's just an excuse not to do the house work

[Mama1980]

Morning all
Yep giddy am totally with you! After the total torture of months unable to touch Alex I'm just never putting him down! Forget the house baby snuggles are much more important.

[num3onway]

With regards to a child minder I would make sure you are happy with everything safety wise. I would personally choose a nursery over a child minder any day but that is my opinion. I think child minding is an absolute mine field. A good day nursry will never have a member of staff alone with a child, they likely have CCTV, people who come I to contact with children are supervised adequately and crb checked. With childminders yes anyone in the house had a crb check. But not visitors. And can you be sure the childminder won't leave the room with a visitor there?
Don't want to scare anyone! I just dislike the situation.

[PeachActiviaMinge]

Utterly jealous of you all with lovely snuggly babies! Due today but stubborn fidgety little boy shows no signs of making his appearence and DD was 8 days late so am not holding out much hope.

Congratulations on all the lovely newbons though!

[HadALittleFaithBaby]

I would probably look at another child minder just to be certain about my decision but it sounds good ratbag.

Having tried to comfort my baby for 3 days solid I quite enjoy putting her down so we can both rest but its different circumstances, isn't it? I love when she gazes up at me when I am holding her :)

Poor Peach it must be frustrating! Hope it happens soon.

Well I am a happy Mummy because I finally have a contented baby. Just waiting for approval from doc but we should be going home this afternoon!

[SneezySnatcher]

Bit of a black day today. Had a visit from a MW as it's our first day at home. Obviously everything is fine with Henry and she was impressed with his weight gain etc. she hadn't realised about the delivery so when she looked at my notes and saw about the abruption/crash section/blood transfusion she was shocked and kept going on about how serious it was and how we almost died. I knew this but I've been trying not to think about it.

Then DH saw neighbours and told them baby was here. They said they knew because they had heard me in labour 'either that or it was a really good orgasm.' Now I know this was just a stupid comment and they were trying to be funny but it's really upset me (I think it was the final straw). It horrifies me that they heard me at such a private time, especially when the labour went so dramatically wrong.

I have come upstairs to cry while DD and DS are with DH. I feel like now I've started I'll never stop.

[toobreathless]

sneezy stupid MW! I honestly think you wouldn't be normal If you weren't a bit all over the place after Henry's birth. Be kind to yourself, especially with a toddler too & an unplanned CS, hope you have lots of support? Neighbours sound like idiots, ignore them, what a silly comment. I think I may have traumatised my neighbours for life who I've not met and came over to look after DD. There was me screaming 'I think I'm doing a poo' at the top of my voice (that was the head!) and they don't have kids

[toobreathless]

peach was also absolutely convinced I would go well over this time as DD1 was induced for being so late- I never went into labour by myself. DD2 arrived very, very quickly at 40 + 1 so there is hope :)

faith hope you get home today,

[ratbagcatbag]

Sneezy, my birth was fine and I still felt exactly the same as you when I got home, I even cried this morning because of the stupid postman, and I'm five weeks on, please don't worry about the comment it was made in good humour and they don't know the finer more worrying details. Have a good cry and I found I felt lots better after that. Big hugs.

[ratbagcatbag]

Num3 - see your point about childminders, however I muc prefer mature childminders than just left school teenagers on minimum wage in a nursery, I know they'll be crb checked but I really find nurserys not ideal for babies. :) I like them for when dd is older though.
I did ring a couple more this morning, but only one has availability and I again didn't click, I've now rang my lovely ladies back and we are sorting the finer details out. :)

[ElliesWellies]

Sneezy that is so insensitive of them, MW and neighbours. People just do not think before they open their mouths, sometimes.

As my grandma said to me the other day, it is hard enough dealing with a newborn, let alone a newborn and a toddler, let alone if the labour was particularly traumatic. My labour was fairly straightforward this time, although had shoulder dystocia, thankfully all sorted quickly enough before it got too scary and no lasting effect for DD. But was followed by a post-partum haemorrhage and a really bad infection (maternal sepsis), meaning I would have died without urgent medical attention. It turned into a scene out of 'Casualty' very quickly.

I think it takes time for you to mull over something like that, and you just don't have that time with young children. Hence it will come back and just hit you at random moments.

I have been home nearly two weeks and I still get the horrors when I think of what could have been. Be easy on yourself. Probably best to cry and try to process it all.