November 2012 - They WERE sleeping, what happened?

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1688444-November-2012-Forget-50-books-in-2013-well-have-50-threads

Eliza glad things are progressing ok. Are they formula feeding? Are you able to bf as well? Or just express?

stunt that's so hard!! Have you told DH what's going on? I know its not reasonable for him to only care about XBox etc but equally he genuinely may not recognise that there's other stuff to be done. And whilst it drives me nuts that I have to ask DH to do things, rather than him just DO them, at least they get done... Try to prioritise. I do laundry first mostly, as once I've showered etc, that can be on & doing whilst I'm feeding or out etc. I load the dishwasher as we go. I may occasionally wash up or clean the toilet but generally, that's it until DH gets in. I'll start cooking dinner & washing up when he comes home, otherwise, he does it. The house is relatively tidy when you consider I live with the untidiest hoarder of a man but dusty. But meh. I need to eat, sleep & shit at some point!! And as for ff - is that what you really want to do, as VQ et al have said?

detective yours does the 30mins shit too??!!! DH sometimes comes in from work, working in an office, eating, drinking & chatting as much or as little as he wants, saying I haven't had a poo today & proceeds to spend ages on the loo. Seriously??!! Like I've been chillaxing & doing f-all ALL day!!!

VQ I do generally at night offer boob first, but on other nights, he has been waking too often to need a feed really & he hasn't wanted it - he unlatches & covers us both if he's not hungry. I don't want him to get into the habit of feeding to sleep/only being settled by boob. He does tend to make different noises when tired to when hungry but at night I usually only respond to low level crying, but before it gets to full on hysteria.

kirrin hugs. We had the more wakeful baby at 14.5wo so I don't think A has read the instruction manual... Hope you get a break soon.

At night DH waits a few minutes to see if she self settles. If not he gets up and puts her dummy back in. She then grizzles away for a few minutes but settles again. We had a couple of nights of sleep regression a week or two ago and bottle was last resort. Partly because it's a PITA to go out into the cold part of the house but mainly because we know she doesn't need it, she can hang on for a couple more hours, and I don't want her to get into the habit of eating during the night again. That might make me sound harsh, but sleeping is so important...

LO is officially Better. Bit achey I'd guess, because I am too, but she is spiling and chatting and generally being cute.

Eliza it's good they are managing to get her to feed. I hope you did get some rest. Thinking of you and LO.

VQ :o

I will try and find a cat video to link to. There was a great thread this week or last on here with loads.

If she was off her food like this week and woke up hungry she'd obviously have a bottle. Bizarrely the flu has made her sleep brilliantly.

kirrin hugs - is dp around today? If so hand LO over for 3/4 hours and go and rest - he needs to see what you do day in day out, he'll cope and you need some respite to continue xx - what's your childcare arrangements for returning to work?? Even though dots is generally a very good baby, I do like having the pressure taken off me by having kit /training days - it makes all the difference being freed from the sofa for a day that I enjoy returning to it the next day iykwim?? I think I'm getting the best of both worlds might all fall to shit but so far I'm Dottie's mum some days and back to an individual others

I'm crap at jokes and the only ones I can remember are from a Mexican night so not sure whether they are appropriate

Oh here's a lame one:

Horse walks into a bar, bar man says why the long face?

Piece of string walks into a bar and orders a pint, barman says sorry I can't serve you if you are string and the string says I'm afraid not(I'm a frayed knot)

Man walks into a bar: ouch!!!!

And here's one I made up as a 12 yr old back in the eighties

What is Simon Le Bon's wife called??

Joanne Joanne (Duran Duran) I thought it was/is hilarious!!!!!!!!

3 daredevil parrots standing at the top of 3 very long slides. At the bottom of every slide there is a door.

Parrot number 1 bravely leaps into the first chute, whizzes down and at the last second the door opens leaving parrot number 1 able to land with a victorious 'ta da!'

Parrot number 2 dives fearlessly into the second chute. The crowd gasps as he hurtles towards the door. It opens in the nick of time and parrot number 2 lands with a victorious 'ta da!'

Parrot number 3, the finale of the daredevil performance does a spectacular dive into his slide. He hurtles down; weaving and winding round every bend. He nears the door and positions himself for exit when WHACK! The parrot is splattered.

Parrot number 1 turns sadly to parrot number 2 and says "what happened to parrot number 3?"

Parrot number 2 says "his parrotchute didn't open"

Boo boom Ching!

My fave most stupid joke ever
"What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?"
"Doyathinkhesaurus"
Sorry love it!

A lobster walks into a bar, approaches the barman, who says "You can get out right now!!". The lobster says "But why? I haven't said anything yet?!!" The barman says "You come in here, giving it all that..."

LOL at the jokes!!

kirrin hugs, that sounds a nightmare. It was 15 weeks when e was waking more (albeit only once or twice) and drinking lots. I hope you get some sleep soon, can you pass her to DH for a bit?

I am a bit worried that this morning is like a carbon copy of yesterday morning! I'm just gonna get on with it, will be fine, if he whinges he whinges! It's just I worry that I'm missing something important but he'll be smiley and fine and thn start whining. It's like a dog whimpering, he sounds sorry for himself but I can't think why. I am tempted to give him calpol but dont like to give meds unless necessary. Still no temp, weeing fine, sleeping more than usual but still. Being a sod with his bottles but I'd have thought if it were because something hurt (teeth I guess?) he would be the same at night but he is fine then.

Joke:

Why did the baker have smelly hands? Cos he kneaded a poo

What do you call a blindfold deer?

No idea! (No eye deer...)

Dyslexic man walks into a bra...

(Sorry, couldn't resist )

Good morning ladies. Thank you for all you kind words the other day.
I have spoken with DP and told him everything, he was really good, he starts a new job Monday which is worrying me how I'll cope, he did say that he'd decline the offer and stay off a few more months as we still have savings but I think it will be better having the job just up the road now rather than it not bring available in a coupe of months and him have to go a lot further afield, plus this job offers a rare training opportunity so I've told him to take it, we can meet for lunch if I'm really struggling in the day and its a comfort knowing he's only 5 minutes from home at any one time.

I am using this weekend to pit strategies in place to tackle things I'm finding hard, isolation and loneliness being a big one so I'm going to the baby group my sister attends on a Tuesday for a start and I'll find other things to do during the other days of the week.

I need for my own piece of mind to get a cleaning/tidying system in place so I don't go mad! I guess it's a case of taking it one day at a time and taking a deep breath and baby steps to regain some normality.

A polar bear walks into a bar and says "Can I have a pint of............................................... beer please?" The barman says "Why the big pause (big paws)?"

A neutron walks into the bar and orders a pint. He asks "How much?" The barman says "For you, no charge".

Geddit??!

kirrin I second glenda's suggestion. I have to do this with DP sometimes as he never just takes DS off my hands so I hand him to him and go and do what I need to do. Whether that's housework, sleeping, going to the shops.

Cacacaz that's the exact reason I want DS to be confident around water too. Neither of my parents swim so they never took me when I was small. I didn't learn until I was about 9 or 10 when we had lessons at school and I used to cry every week because I hated it. I was taking DS swimming every week until he got ill and might start again next week if he's better.

DS slept 6.5 hours straight last night so I'm quite pleased with that. Before he was ill he was starting to go 7 or 8 hours so fingers crossed he will go back to that soon.

Looking forward to reading all these jokes today.

Tits As far as cleaning goes, could you do the FLY thing (sort of) of doing 15mins a day, maybe tackling one room a day until things are a bit more sorted? Say 15mins of dusting & hoovering the lounge one day, 15mins of decluttering another, 15mins on the kitchen the next? If you add in doing at least one laundry load a day, you might find things start improving & help your anxiety? Does your washing machine have a timer/delay function? We often set ours to go in the middle of the night, so its done before anyone needs the shower in the morning, & its ready to hang out first thing.

Oh and as for the job Tits I agree, I think given the economy etc a job now is worth its weight in gold. I wouldn't want to delay regardless of how much you have savings wise, although it will be hard at first. And it sounds like you're doing the right thing about getting out. Have you checked the Local MN bit? Or asked your HV or checked out your Sure Start Childrens Centres? Or Netmums local bit? I found all my Mum friends through groups - one of which I went to after seeing it on Netmums.

Well I can't complain. He woke at 8.50 to start the day. So far, he's not been put down, and we've had 3 big vomits after his first feed. I hope today improves on that!

There's no chance of us going anywhere today. A baby who won't be put down, my hair needs washing, and getting ready and washing hair seems impossible at the moment unless DP is here.

Slob day in PJ's it is then!

Tits could you use your savings towards a cleaner? Maybe 2 hours twice a week would really help right now? I know I'd love someone to come and do my hoovering and clean my kitchen and bathroom! And wash and iron my bedding! The rest can wait IMO! Dust will always be there no matter what!

As for getting out, I do 3 baby groups a week. I find that a massive help. I'm getting to know the other mums now as we all attend the same groups. I had 7 different people say hello and stop to chat to me in baby clinic this week!

All the groups are at the children's centre. They all have a small cost £1-1.50) as they are run by a lady who isn't anything to do with the children's centre. There are lots of really nice people there.

morning why are pirates, pirates? because they arrrrr! that washilarious when I was high on gas and air in labour. honestly.

nephews party today and I decided I would dress up for once as iam fed up of feeling grumpy. just,a little prob of not being arsed...

Why is a bungalow called a bungalow?

They were building a house but ran out of bricks, so decided to bung a low roof on.

Ahem.

Detective sounds like you had a better night. Off to catch up properly on the thread now.

Off out for a big family lunch later so trying to make sure O naps well this morning to try and avoid a pass-the-baby induced meltdown later...

Tits I am so glad your DP is being supportive, that will make such a big difference.

I second what has been said about baby groups. My depression was loneliness induced and baby groups were something that was really out of my comfort zone. However I forced myself to go and everyone has been lovely. All the mums seemed keen to make friends and there is always something to talk about with babies.

You really sound like you know what you need to do to get better which is fantastic. We are all behind you

The Pope is on a Papal Tour in the US and he's being driven around in a big limousine with tinted windows. While travelling between two engagements he says to the chauffeur, "You know, since I became Pope I'm not allowed to drive anywhere and I really love driving. Is there any chance I could have a go?" The chauffeur is a bit surprised but sympathetic so he agrees and pulls over.

The Pope gets into the driver's seat and the chauffeur goes round to sit in the back. Soon the Pope is driving along the freeway having a great time but he doesn't notice his speed creeping above the speed limit until he sees blue lights behind him. The cop pulls the limo over but does a double take when he sees who's driving. He goes back to his motorbike to call it in, "Chief I've just pulled a car over for speeding and it's a real VIP. What should I do?" The Chief of Police radios back saying, "The law is the law, who is so important that you shouldn't stop them for speeding?" To which the cop replies, "Well I don't know but the Pope is his driver!"

That sounds like a good plan tits, I can't remember if you are breastfeeding, but if you are I would advise finding your nearest baby cafe (breastfeeding group). I have found my local groups to be brilliant places to meet people and the focus isn't on entertaining babies, it's just a place to feed and chat to other mums. With cleaning, I have set days to do the big jobs e.g. Thursday to clean the bathroom, Friday strip the beds.

I bf but I never shove a boob in on first waking in the night. I usually wait to see if she'll go back off on her own, if not I put her dummy in. This usually gives me a couple more hours sleep! B's hungry cry start with a little cough sound, unless I hear that she gets the dummy. I also put the dummy back in if she wakes up when napping if she hasn't had at least an hour.

Thinking of you today Eliza

NUK bottles are the only ones we can use here too detective. I'm also interested in buying yours if horsey doesn't have them garden

Where do fish keep their money? In the river bank.

What do you call a man sitting in a bag of leaves? Russell.

Glenda I used to like cracking a whole egg into a toastie but I might be on my own.

Tits that sounds like a good plan. I think those two things - getting out every day and doing small jobs around the house - have stopped me tipping over the edge.

Eliza sounds like a promising start, hope E is doing ok. DH sends his best wishes too and L sends a big dribbly kiss.

We had a dreadful night. Not sure if hangover from jabs or sleep regression but he was just constantly waking and grizzling, thank goodness it's the weekend so DH is here. I do offer dummy and hand-stroking before breast if I think he can go longer but still ended up feeding at 2,4&6am. Each time he dozed off in my arms, waited, transferred and then woke himself up a few minutes later. We played a lot of dummy tennis!

Toomany that's my DD1s favourite joke she saw it on Ben and Holly and tells it quite often

I usually offer a boob if LO wakes in the night but she never gets to the stage where she cries as she's right next to me in the bedside cot. She has a hungry cry which is a sort of cough/cry. She's got a v snotty nose at the mo and kept me awake quote a lot with her snuffling, she seemed to be sleeping ok tho!

Glad your DP is being supportive tits.

Sorry to hear your DH isn't Stunt

I do try and do a bit of housework during the day if LO sleeps but usually I leave it til DP gets in and we do it together. He can be a PITA sometimes but I think I'm lucky really

Love the jokes

There was a bomb in a cheese factory...

All that was left was debrie...

tits what everyone else said^^ groups are a lifesaver. I have 2 gangs I meet up with - both I met when DD1 was a baby. A breast feeding group or an under 1s is a great place to meet people and get a change of scene. Your DP sounds very supportive which is great, and I think you are right in thinking he should keep hold of his job offer - in the long term it's the best thing to do.

Thanks for all the hugs and sympathy - I don't know what I'd do without you lot :) I don't think there's much chance of a break today but now I'm up and dressed I don't feel so bad. I need to get out somewhere though, a walk to the park or something. And glenda I am looking forward to going back to work, for those exact reasons! I'm just a bit worried about it because it's a new job, new skills, new people - feels a little overwhelming, but exciting at the same time.

pass I've been reading that book too - it's great. I was definitely guilty of leaping up at every whimper but now I wait a bit to see what develops, whilst never leaving her to actually cry. She often chills out again so putting her down (in the day) seems to be getting easier. At night is a whole other issue, but I may well be trying detective's idea tonight to see if that helps.

What the difference between a kangaroo and a kangaroot?
A kangaroo is an animal that lives in Australia; a kangaroot is geordie stuck in a lift.