November 2012 - They WERE sleeping, what happened?

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1688444-November-2012-Forget-50-books-in-2013-well-have-50-threads

Well, N is sleeping in half hour chunks :( very annoying.

Hope you're all doing better than I am.

My biggest upset of yesterday: not having any clean pyjamas to wear at bedtime or any clean clothes for tomorrow due to not having enough time to finish the washing and ironing. DH's biggest upset of yesterday is tied between not being able to find his fretboard oil when changing his guitar stings, and the download for the Xbox taking a long time. Shame he didn't get time to change the bed sheets while I was making lunch and dinner for us and doing the washing up both times. Honestly it's like our lives are poles apart at the moment. Think I might chuck him out tomorrow.

VQ mine is more I'm conscious of over feeding like now and also a plastic teat doesnt offer comfort. he didn't wake for food, he woke because he wanted a cuddle and his nappy was beyond soaked. He drank an ounce but didn't want more and so spat it out.

Stunt eBay for DH, or eBay the Xbox.

Has anyone tried the sleep thing in why French babies don't throw food. Am considering trying a bit of sleep training to stop him drinking 14oz overnight. Any advice?

What do you give a blonde who has everything?

Penicillin

I have given up on sleep but have put a load of washing out to dry, done the ironing (except DH's clothes), emptied the dishwasher and put the dirty dishes in, and put all the baby stuff on to sterilise. I just can't manage to keep up with the basics at the moment, especially not having anything to wear. The place isn't a disaster zone but it's by dint of trying to cram in as much housework as possible. I was wondering whether switching to formula might help since J's feeds can take 45 minutes or more every 3 hours during the day although night feeds are generally only 30 minutes. Maybe he would take a bottle quicker than that. He's 16 weeks on Thursday which was far as I got with ebf DS1 and DS2.

Ok, I'm done. After all the 30 minutes sleeps since 10, I gave N a bottle. She drained it fell, went straight down in her cot and slept for.............. 45 mins. We appear to be back where we started. And I can't see DP giving me a break anytime soon as he has decided that he is mr perfect around here and I am generally shit.

stunt are you doing all those things now? Is J asleep? Your DH doesn't sound like he's going to win any awards anytime soon :( Have you spoken to him about it? Does he recognise how hard it is for you right now?
FF might make things easier for you, and you've given him a good start. But only switch if you're happy too, not because you feel you have to - esp if DH could be doing more to help.

stunt sorry you're having a poo time :( that's pretty much how I'm feeling at the moment and today dp goes away for a week with work. Not sure how all you ladies manage on your own/with dps/dhs who work away but I'm terrified. Anyway just wanted to say that formula doesn't necessarily mean quick feeds. O has and always will take an hour to feed, she will only have 2-3oz to begin with and the about 45 mins later she'll finish/almost finish the bottle. Nothing I've done changes it

Vq I agree with the others we need more excellent health visitors. Good luck!

Eliza I hope the hospital stay is short but you get answers

GT have a lovely holiday

Detective we also have a neoprene wrap from 2 bare feet. Actually we have 2 as I ordered a 0-6 months and a 6-12. The 0-6 is too small for M, anyone who wants it is welcome to it.

Bplp you have me salivating at the thought of a chocolate fountain

Apple we are almost halfway through our course of waterbabies, it is expensive but M loves it. As a child I was terrified of water and can only just swim, I wanted my Lo to be confident in the water.

Can't sleep. Decided to get up and express catch up on MN will go back to bed in a bit

kirrin big big hug. You are not having an easy time of it at all. How old is LO? Growth spurt?

stunt it is very hard keeping on top of everything. The amount of washing up and clothes washing three kids produce plus DH is unbelieveable. I do at least two loads of washing a day plus nappies. I do not iron anything and try to only do the essentials but even so. Then there is the school run and homework and cooking.

It may help to ff, but that may bring extra work, possibly new problems, and may lead to guilt and resentment on your behalf. Obviously it is your choice how to feed your child, but it needs to be for the right reasons and I am not sure an unhelpful DH or housework would be for you x

How about mixed feeding to suit you and get DH involved more? It is helping me, but has also helped me ironically to enjoy feeding more, has increased my trust in my body and my milk, and made me want to continue feeding as long as possible.

In relation to men, it is not suprising their life changes so little. They did not carry and deliver this little one. They do not get to have a baby bubble away from work. They do not get to do the lions share of feeding, caring and nurturing this little bundle. They do not get this quiche. I know which I would prefer, even though it has brought me to my knees.

They also have to live with a penis. I would get nothing done if I had one of them.

Well I think it's probably the first time I've joined the night crew. Not because I'm sleeping all night before you all get jealous. I normally feed lying down and don't take my phone up to bed. She's about to have her third lot of 100ml. They try her with a bottle first and whatever she doesn't take goes down the tube. She took 30ml from the nurse earlier but none from me. Think that was a nuk teat but this is a normal one. We've had the most success with a nuk at home, although she refuses it now.

pass horrible isn't it. Now it's in she seems fine, now I'm not looking forward to it coming out. Sorry poor P had to have it done too.

stunt I am the same, as soon as E grizzles at night I shove a boob in her mouth and it calms her right down. Big massive boooo to your shitty DH and lack of sleep

Think the nurse will be coming back soon so better stop looking like a bad mother on her phone and attend to E.

vq your penis comment made me laugh!! Thank you. You're a genius.

Kirrin massive hugs. I hope you both manage to get some sleep. Could you wake Dp and tell him he needs to take over?

Stunt I have no idea how anyone with more than 1 child copes. I am a nanny and used to juggling 3 kids, keeping on top of their laundry and preparing meals. It bought in some ways that would prepare me for motherhood. Wrong.

Damn autocorrect that should read I thought, in some ways it would prepare me for motherhood.

eliza I am glad I made you laugh x

Yawn!!!

Made me laugh too VQ! Willys are ugly fuckers though.

2nd feed just finished in the time it took me to read 16 messages! Speedy!

I got him back in the cot after the last feed although he woke on transfer. I put the White noise on and put him slightly on his side and patted his bum for a few minutes and he went off. Kept opening one eye though to check I was still there!!

Think I'll keep him in with me this time as DP about to get up and I don't want O disturbed. (DP on sofa!)

Back to sleep I hope.....

Eliza brave mummy xxx

Stunt they really don't have their world turned upside down like we do! I deliberately spent 30 mins on the loo the other day. Twice. Just like he does . A taste of his own medicine!

Stunt, kirrin and VQ huge hugs.

Have just fed LO and pout him down like its the middle of the night. I really don't want him to start waking at 6 every day. So far I'm not sure it's working.

Stunt as VQ says only ff if it gives you something. For me I got 4 hours a day back to play with him. He sleeps no longer or is much different.

Thanks guys. She is 15 weeks VQ I have given up predicting growth spurts etc, but this has been going on for a while now, we just had a few days break where she seemed ok - obviously just a break though!
I'm starting to think that going back to work at 6 months might not have been the brightest idea. Not sure how learning a new job is going to work when feeling like this. Hopefully she'll get sleeping before then!

stunt you've done amazing. If you think ff will help then mix feed for a while. But if your swapping because of washing then honestly in another 10 weeks max you're going to be offering solids. It's then the home straight. Feeds will reduce.

I know he'll be ok!! Made the train after doing 60mph on the roads and now sat in first class!!! Though there appears to be no free wifi. Erm!?!!!

vq you were asking about rocking to sleep. My Nct friends find it hilarious that e has three cries. One for pain (hate it), one for general 'meh' ness (cuddles from mummy or tiredness again I can generally tell and he usually has other signs before crying so I don't hear this one much!!) and then one for hunger. At night he's either hungry crying or whining before starting the cuddle cry. So I tend to just listen and see. Sometimes he just talks to himself too!! Bizarrely they say they struggle to hear their babies cry in a crowd but know etiennes cry and think he's famous for it!! But he goes from 0 to sqwark when very hungry!!! No hunger cues. Nothing. Never have been!! Cues for tiredness/cuddles/playing but hunger -one of the prime instincts we have - no.

pikz the French thing is listening to your baby. So when he stirs you give him (or her) the opportunity to self settle. The French rarely let the baby build up to full on crying. In fact I think they'd be pretty horrified to do that. I don't think it's a French thing. I think I've always done that.

Forgot to say, we have full on belly laughs and jumping up and down with excitement here!! It's sooooo sweet!! I love him so much.

kirrin hugs she's really being tricky isn't she? Huge hugs. I hope you managed some sleep. Hourly bursts the other night hurt me.

detrctive thanks for the link. I might try these as e needs a bigger one for next term!!

Oh eliza hugs hugs hugs

pass hi five to you too!!

Good morning. Lolz!

I have wondered about the ff/bf night waking thing. Like horsey says P has different cries. She doesn't always do then or sometimes she does them very briefly and I miss them but she makes a fast 'mmm, mmm, mmm' for hunger and a 'moo' type noise for tired. The fact is that if P was to wake in the night I would try dummy, Ewan, cuddles before trekking down the stairs to sort a bottle. Sometimes during the day P wakes crying and it takes me by surprise that she wants food.

I bought French Children Don't Throw Food - I love it. We didn't know it but DH and I have always done 'The Pause'. Credit to DH for that actually as I would launch myself at her as soon as she peeped. DH would hold my hand or give me a cuddle and say "just give her a minute" with a caveat that proper crying got an immediate response. I think he gotta proper crying once or twice.

P's new favourite thing now is blowing raspberries