October 2012: onwards, upwards and rolling over?

[YompingJo]

Is this part 5 already? Where did that time go?

crazy I totally sympathise re sleep, we have the same pattern. Last night she managed to sleep 4-4:40 which is usually prime shouty time. We have moved bedtime from 7 to 8.30 which seems to have shifted first waking/feed from 12:30 to 1:30 though. you are amazing to cope with ds1 as well on so little sleep!

Babyfunch rolled front to back for the first time this morning, then promptly did it again for me to video for DH! if I read that a year ago I would have thought what a ridiculous bit of pfb-ism

squid cherry re hunger I think I once read that bfing post 3 months is when the weight really starts to come off, so maybe their calorie needs ate greater now, hence feeling hungry?

orenishii to me you sound like you have a wonderfully clear set of principles to base your parenting on and you should use those...books and experts are for people like me who are less clear about the means they want to employ to achieve the ends we all share - a happy healthy baby in a happy loving home

oreniishi I feel just like you - want to carry on with my instincts but feel so confused by all the sleep advice/rules. I don't want to end up 2 years from now with a toddler waking 3 times a night but maybe I'm panicking too much. Thing is DD's sleep isn't great at night - last night was quite good and she was awake 4 times! I'm sure if she could self settle like the advice says it might improve. Thing is whenever we try she gets so upset. I kind of feel that she's not ready to be pressured to self settle and she'll do it in her own time.

I think we all have to think about how far we have all come. DD wouldn't even be put down in the first few weeks. We had to take it in turns to hold her all night.

london that is such a good point about the fact that you wouldn't expect any other aspect of your life to follow a particular pattern exactly in line with everyone else, so why do we put this pressure on ourselves with regard to babies?

Exactly. Gina Ford can fuck right off.

Hunger. I thought mine had finally settled. Past few weeks seemed more normal. This week tho is back again. Really need to eat, my weight loss is not attractive. Skeletor springs to mind......

Anyone using a stretchy sling they can recommend?

bora ds2 lives in the Moby. love it.

those worried now about night waking and implications for future - ds1 was a complete nightmare at night until 14 months. he finally started doing longer stretches at that point until 16m when he suddenly started sleeping through. he is now usually a champion sleeper. throughout that time we went to him when he was upset and gave him what he needed. now if he wakes at night he generally chats happily to himself until he goes off again, unless something is wrong. I believe that's because we've created positive sleeping associations and he feels secure. it could all be bollocks of course, and I do believe that sleeping through is a developmental milestone that different children get to at different ages, but I think the journey there is important.

rant over!

I like the Moby too. am not keen on using it for long periods as sometimes she seems a bit uncomfortable bit its good for a quick pop tip the ships or a short walk.

Do you particularly want a stretchy one? As someone on here pointed out, you can't use the stretchy ones for a rucksack carry, you need a woven one for that so that's what I'd probably get next time as you can then carry on your front or your back.

ahahaha auto correct genius! I think I meant 'a quick pop to the shops'...!

arghhhhhh today is terrible already. Awake and singing at 5.30 after crap night, and have just given up trying to get her to sleep after over an hour. Feeding and rocking/shhhing on shoulder, the only things that work have been total failure. So she is in her cot and will just have to self settle. And yesterday we had 3 40 min naps between 5am and 8pm.... and an incredibly grizzly baby. What are you suppossed to do when nothing works, not even all the so called sleep props? And Ewan worked for 1 day precisely.

orenishii if you and DS are happy with what you are doing then keep at it! It's total crap that they can't get sleep in a sling/buggy/car.... if it was true then either most babies would constantly be evil grizzle monkeys or their mothers would go nuts from lack of social interaction (not being able to go anywhere). I think all the books and websites are good for giving you ideas, but just pick and choose the bits that work for you and ignore the rest [bgrin] I read somewhere last week that babies will only sleep for 10 mins if being held [bshock] ... DD has been held for most of her naps since birth and most have been over 10 mins so I know that one's twaddle! Oh and totally agree with WTF on babies not needing to feed every 2 hrs??? I've seen that somewhere too. Some people have clearly never met real babies!

squid totally starving again this week. Just about eaten myself out of house and home. And just about outeating DH who has been shearing and working really hard!

another vote for a moby wrap bora up to 10-12kg I think?

Thanks for reassurance crazy I think you're right about good sleeping being developmental and needing to create positive associations. This is such a short period of time in the grand scheme of things (although some days seem to last forever [bwink] ) and we know they WILL get there eventually (are you listening babies [bsmile] )

Yup i'd go for a woven one next time too... for the rucksack carry ability as you can use them for that much longer.

arghhhhh DD asleep 15 mins and DH decides it's time to start sanding bedroom window with power tool. Nap over! Nobber

Interesting RE woven sling. Do you know of any good ones?

I've heard storchenwiege and hoppediz do good woven wraps but haven't used one myself

I just bought an ellaroo on eBay but haven't worked out how to use it yet! I'll stick with the Moby until she's old enough to sling her up on my back when we go out.

Do stretchy wraps go over your coat then, when you use them on the back? I had a moby and did use it a bit for a week or two but got my beco (a soft carrier thing with buckles) around 2 weeks because where the fabric went in relation to your clothes just confused me. And my coat didn't fit on top properly (though I guess it was a bit tight anyway from pregnancy weight gain)

I remember asking the girls at the sling library this and they were like - just wear your moby all day, but the idea of that really annoyed me

Anyway I should be able to use my beco on my back once head control is good enough. She has almost outgrown the infant insert bit. (And in the car seat!)

Well, we are just past the "eye of the storm" according to that wonder weeks chart that is doing the rounds, but Jess is so good it appears to just be one good night, one bad night. She needed a long feed (1hr) before bed in the dark, and dad to stroke her for a good 45 mins after that, but then she slept 8pm-6am!!!! I am a lucky cow. I view it as karma for being a horrible insomniac for the last 5 years, I am sleeping like a baby now (and how stupid is that phrase!)

Having a cup of tea now and putting together motivation to do a workout. Got mates coming today so hope the evening isn't too stressful.

Elpis so sorry about work. Is that legal? It probably is. Cunts. So sorry.
I want to hire your DD also! I have a friend who has a 5 month old and is doing some childminding work, which I found extraordinary, but she says it's actually easier than being home alone as the kids (9 & 6) entertain the baby

crazy Yes!! I have only fed off one side since about 4 weeks when the engorgement was unbearable! But she is so hungry right now and I haven't been engorged for ages and ages now (don't even need breast pads any more) so yes, two boobs per feed now! I was a bit nervous but they don't seem to have exploded.

I have also enjoyed reading everyone's routines, and yes, it's reassuring that none of us are following some textbook routine... we all have our various struggles. I do think babies under 6 months can't be forced to do anything, and any sort of routine is a bonus really! I also think it's completely fair enough to try and push babies one way or another (gently) if their sleep/cry/playtimes are difficult to cope with, but if you're happy with the way things are, why mess...

funchum you may be right about the breastfeeding hunger, also, I have visibly lost loads of weight just in the last couple of weeks. Haven't weighed myself or anything but it is definitely coming off. So I just had to patient like everyone said (jess is 4 months in a couple of days...)

Happy Burns night everyone. I am doing one a couple of weeks late with some mates. and I will have at least one whisky after baby is in bed so there

Hello! Back home after a couple of nights away. Looking forard to a catch up but just did the first feed of day and bean is back asleep. She finally did another night with no feed middle of night. Mon and Wed we had 2 hrs of screamathon so last night was due to be another one but somehow we headed it off after half an hour and she went from 00:15-08:38. Please let this be a sign of things to come...

Haven't even read all that sleep link yet - anyone want to summarise? :o

Going back to bed for an hour...

lie in this morning! fed at 11.45 and 3.45 then needed settling at 4.30 cut slept til 6!!! hooray!

squid about the Moby - yeah I just wear it all day and look like a right dick. also have to feed over the top of tops rather than lifting top which I hate, very exposing. can't wait to graduate on to the ergo, hurry up and get head control ds2!! hope he likes the ergo...

Sorry not to have been keeping in contact. I have been reading (ouch re nipple crack huffle and holy cow Angelico re that link - it has scared the crap out of me) but being at my parents has left less time for mumsnet. It's been great to have the company but I will be glad to get home tomorrow, not least because DF can start doing the late feed again and I can get a bit more sleep. DD has taunted me by sleeping from 11pm to 6am twice and has now gone back to 3 or 4 am. I am shattered. And worse, I keep lying awake at night trying to work out what I did wrong or how I can make her sleep longer. Sigh. On the positive side, she does go to sleep at 7ish most days so I do get a bit of respite.

My dad is convinced that formula is the answer. I keep telling him that as she's allergic to dairy it won't necessarily be straightforward to find a formula she can tolerate, when I do give up, and I don't particularly want to add to my troubles right now, with more gastric distress.

On the subject of breastfeeding, how long are people planning to keep it up for? I'd originally said four months but I actually really love feeding her and think now more like six months. I would like to have a bit more freedom to go out and leave her for a few hours without endlessly having to express. And, selfishly, DF and I wanted to have a two night minimoon (this would be in mid may). His mum has offered to look after dd, but storing up two days of breast milk ain't easy and I don't think expressing would add much of a romantic feel to our minimoon.

Oh and squid, sorry to hear about your gran. Tis always hard to lose a loved one. Hugs.

so a couple of mates came over last night. they we asking me about my labour and I told them a bit about it and basically started crying. Should I be worried about my mental health? Thought I was ok with it because I just try not to think about it, but maybe I should...

Thanks londonlivvy
Funeral is in a couple of weeks, but I'm not dreading it. Sometimes it's nice to have a celebration/cry. I hope I live to 90!! (Both my grans did, in pretty good health...)

I doubt formula is the answer, I think that's one of those myths that go round (like solids help babies sleep) Hugs - it's so tough on the soul, sleep deprivation. Nothing you are doing wrong, babies just being babies!!

On breastfeeding - I was hoping to make it to 4 or maybe 6 months and didn't enjoy it at all - until about 2 weeks ago. Now I'm really really enjoying it (literally I get this dreamy happiness when I feed) and wonder if I'm going to go the Elpis route....

londonmrs
I have found the thing that helps the most is talking about it A LOT, with women who have given birth. And you may find it surprising the perspective other people have. I mean, I felt like a failure for labour going on and on and bloody on and being so much more painful than I anticipated - but other people have thought I was incredible... for going on and on and on with such a painful labour!! Not the way I was framing it at all.

You had a much longer labour than me, dealt with unsympathetic shitty hospital staff, had what sounds like a particularly tough latent bit (which is the worst bit to be tough - because NO ONE HELPS YOU!)... had to deal with them cranking up your labour which is incredibly painful, with a failed epidural - and STILL pushed the baby out in epic time! I mean you are basically a goddess.

Have you considered going through your notes with a midwife - I think some people find that helpful. hugs to you too.

londonlivvy re minimoon - mid may baby will be 7,8 months right? So giving some formula is expressing seems like too much work would really not disrupt milk supply at all. And your supply should be settled by then. I doubt you would have to express that much.

I think you are a month behind me postnatally and my boobs have settled down SO much in the last month. Jess can sleep for 12 hours (she does sometimes, SORRY!) and I just feel a little bit full. Maybe one of the long term bf-ers with older kids can confirm what things are like around 7-8 months...