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December 2012 - the Christmas buns are coming out of the oven

999 replies

PurplePidjChickIsNotTheMessiah · 23/12/2012 17:18

New fred...

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Clarella · 03/01/2013 17:11

helplines ...

Secondsop · 03/01/2013 17:40

Thanks Clarella I will look into those. The health visitor also referred me to the breastfeeding clinic but I don't really think I need breastfeeding support itself - I'm committed to keeping going the breastfeeding and he's clearly getting milk from me, but it isn't nourishing him.

MaMaPo · 03/01/2013 17:57

Seconds, I'd go along to anything like that which might be even tangentially helpful. Depends on your time availability of course! Good luck with your issue - sorry I have no advice for you.

WLmum · 03/01/2013 17:59

So sorry to hear that seconds, I was referred to a paed with dd1, also under the illustrious banner of failure to thrive. It was a very hard time so I do feel for you. Have you had lo checked for a tongue tie? Dd3 had hers snipped today, and all the research I've done since it was spotted by hospital bf support on Xmas eve and everything they said at the snip clinic today leads me to believe that dd1 had a tt too, but was undiagnosed, even though I asked for help from everyone I possibly could. Sadly I had to stop bfing dd1 as her weight gain (lack of) and unsettledness just got too much to bear. She's 5.5 now and I still feel guilty that she didn't get what she needed from me in her early weeks (no guilt like a mothers guilt!). She's surely thriving now though.
Fenugreek is great for milk supply btw.

yuletopian99 · 03/01/2013 18:02

Oz was fussing earlier and whenever he fell asleep and I handed him to dh for snuggles he woke up crying. I know it was only because I have the milk and he's so small that to him that beats all other things, but dh has been sad all afternoon and even said 'my own son already hates me', looking really down.

I don't know what to do to cheer him up, I know it can be really infair on the father and as Oz grows up daddy will be the hero of the hour, but i can see why it's hard. They are currently having some skin time under the blanket, which will hopefully help?

Cookiesandcoffee · 03/01/2013 18:18

pidj I've BF in many a car park recently Smile I'm not remotely sorry. Have had a few funny looks but I feel very safe in my car?! It's in laws i can't bf in front of...

Oh seconds I do really feel for you must be so hard, but you're doing such na amazing job all this effort you're putting in.

Spotty men always say the most helpful things Confused sometimes. They find it frustrating I think?

Ahh with trying to bath DDs ive lost my train of thought on phone..

Cookiesandcoffee · 03/01/2013 18:20

Oh and WLmum both my Dds have had bad tongue ties and the pead this time even said she didn't think she had one?! I had one too would you believe! It affected feeding so much with dd1 and I didn't persevere.. I feel guilty now I'm successfully bf dd2.. Stupid mothering hormones!

Secondsop · 03/01/2013 18:29

mamapo y I'll go along next week - it's on the same day as the hv clinic but I just wanted to get him home today because I was upset. I am slightly worried that in a breastfeeding support situation there might be pressure to breastfeed (for entirely laudable reasons) but that my circumstances might be that breastfeeding isn't what's right for him and that it's more important to get his weight up.

WL I haven't had him checked for a tongue tie. I'll ask the doctor about all that tomorrow. I ordered some fenugreek yesterday and some milk that a friend recommended after she had a lot of problems - her boy don't latch on for 6 weeks leaving a trail of astonished lactation specialists behind him, then suddenly he had a cold and maybe wanted comfort or something but decided to latch on. It is great to know that your daughter is doing well now. I think we can beat ourselves up about this too much if we end up on formula despite our best efforts. Our babies are still being fed after all!

yuletopian my little boy prefers his mummy too, which is completely normal at this stage. it can be hard on my husband as he had such a massive immediate bond with him, a bigger rush than I had. Lots of contact seems to help, including skin to skin, and finding a position for Z to doze on him that feels as safe to him as his current position of head on my boob curled up against my tummy. The other thing to bear in mind is that it's such early days and there's so much development to come. There's a video he might like of a time lapse of a man looking after his baby - it was on mommyish.com yesterday - which may make your husband feel better when he sees how well they play together after they surely would have gone through the same spell of the baby preferring mummy.

PurplePidjChickIsNotTheMessiah · 03/01/2013 18:42

We have Aptamil, dp tried him on it while i cooked dinner but he fussed and yelled. Took it ok from me so i think it's where dp can't support him well on his weaker arm. Poor dp ended up finishing cooking the dinner (cous cous with pumpkin, soft diet) while i breast fed. We're now all in bed knackered!! I must get more organised tomorrow, at least I've got some nappies clean and foid in us all...

OP posts:
SpottyTeacakes · 03/01/2013 18:48

Pidj could he use a v pillow or similar? Ds always fusses to start with with the bottle from dp

PurplePidjChickIsNotTheMessiah · 03/01/2013 19:30

I do have one but need him to realise what the reason is for himself iyswim. We're all too tired tonight, we'll sort it tomorrow. We're clean, fed and safe - priorities priorities!

OP posts:
EggsMichelle · 03/01/2013 19:44

Felix has decided he won't sleep anywhere but on our chests, he has woken up straight away every time we put him down in his chair, I'm hoping this doesn't continue tonight and he goes down in his basket. He settles best on OH rather than me.

SpottyTeacakes · 03/01/2013 19:49

Hope you all sleep well tonight pidj Smile must be lovely to all be back in your own bed

WLmum · 03/01/2013 19:58

Oh pidj I have no words for you, just one almighty all encompassing hug. X

yuletopian99 · 03/01/2013 20:16

Will look it up seconds, thanks!

Hope you have a good night pidj, it must be so nice having your family back under one roof..

O has had a lovely 2hr sleep on daddy, which in turn has let me kip beside them both. Think he's feeling happier all round.. Smile

On a totally different and shallow note, my uterus has done a major chunk of shrinking but am still squidgy round the tummy zone. When can i/did you start exercising again? Also have a demon hunger but want to make the most of bfing calorie burn while at the same time not compromising his nutrition. Any thoughs?

StaceymReadyForNumber3 · 03/01/2013 20:24

utopian my DH said 'my son hates me' at around day 15 as Ethan wouldn't settle for him. He seems to be coming to terms with the fact it's the milk Ethan wants not me specifically :) lol

SpottyTeacakes · 03/01/2013 20:26

You can start exercising after your six week check if all is ok.

I'm fatter now than I was when I came out of hospital Sad too much eating crap

Does anyone know when the letdown stops hurting? I swear it's getting worse Sad

HoneyMumandSon · 03/01/2013 20:30

Agghh. My avent breast pump died today. Have been waiting for customer services to call back but nothing yet. Need to get a replacement. What would people recommend? Need not too expensive but reliable.

SpottyTeacakes · 03/01/2013 20:34

The medela is meant to be the best but it's double the price of the Spectra 3 which I have

HoneyMumandSon · 03/01/2013 20:38

How are you finding the spectra spotty? And is it the medela swing?

Cookiesandcoffee · 03/01/2013 20:39

Honey I think my medala is great.. I have the mini one.. I couldn't afford one so I've borrowed one from a friend.
Lovely to hear pidj bet it's lovely to be home altogether

ISpyPlumPie · 03/01/2013 20:39

Willyou- he's a month now. He smiled at DS1 before when DS1 was 'showing' him how to play with the toys on his bouncer which was lovely.

Mamapo - it can be hard work can't it? MIL spent our last visit watching like a hawk for every opportunity to grab N. I'm fine with her wanting to hold him (he is v cuddly) but less ok with the PA "come here, I hardly ever get to see you" comments she makes to him given that she sees him at least once a week!!

Seconds - must be really worrying and frustrating not knowing the best way forward. Sounds like you are working so hard at it and I hope you get the right support to find a solution.

Clarella · 03/01/2013 20:41

hope you all have a good night pidj, do you have any one visiting who can help in next few days?

George's feeding has taken a hit of s turn - he's now able/ keen to try both breasts this eve after clearing one - normally pulls off and pouts refusing anything else. seems suddenly more masterful at burping and farting too which is really relieving - for both of us! no idea how long it'll last!

braved town with mum's help on metro for baby clinic (need to get a docs locally soon!) an h and m raid and lunch - all of which was achieved! I managed to .bf twice at docs then discovered h and m had a changing room for prams which was also great for a quick feed! he was utterly as good as gold (apart from obligatory squirting poo for hv and wee on doc) except on the metro home during which woke up very cross for a feed, yelled the most ever, sporadically chomping on my little finger but then completely stopped as soon as we got off and just pouted as if to say that'll show you - you couldn't even tell hed just been crying for 20 mins solid little monkey! apart from the metro (couldn't quite whip a boob out there!) found bf out and about quite liberating in a strange way - just whip it out and go. will have to plan places to bf for next time :) tummy held up ok too :)

SpottyTeacakes · 03/01/2013 20:42

Yeah sorry the swing, I haven't tried that one though. My only complaint would be that it pumps quite slow (I don't know how fast the medela is as I've only the hospital medela symphony to compare to it probably does one pump to every two of the symphony). You can turn up and down the strength of the suction so it doesn't hurt to start with like a hand pump.

Clarella · 03/01/2013 20:42

honey I do like the medela swing but I managed to get one on offer but a pal has mini and likes that too, I think it's just a bit noisier.