December 2012 - the Christmas buns are coming out of the oven

[PurplePidjChickIsNotTheMessiah]

New fred...

our hv told us most people do the water too cool as they are scared of scalding. We put ours a bit warmer after that and he's started to love bath time (mostly!)

second Z is so cute, he looks really grown up, I think it's all the hair!

stacey I thought that hair might be baby hair that falls out but it just keeps getting longer and longer!

Just reading that 'When did your dc first stay over at their grandparents house?' Thread and am at how many people have said a couple of weeks! Is it not true that babies' don't even realise that they're not attached to you still for a couple of months? I can't imagine leaving ds yet not even for a few hours!

Ok, am ready for a proper mother in law rant. They go back to Australia in 7 days and counting...

Spotty I agree with the others - write today off as a bad job and have a duvet day.

Seconds Jamie loves the bath, especially the feeling of the water on his head! It's so cute! I think his hair is falling out now though. I will be if it does.

Mamapo I love a good MiL thread. Go and post in AIBU so that we can watch you get flamed comment

Well asda was horrific! Chock-a-block with old people blocking the aisles, chatting, generally getting on my tits! We did get swooned over a lot though, so it was worth it!

mama go for it on the mil rant. I haven't had time to go one recently but when I do it's going to be an epic one. but will be here not on AIBU as I'm terrified of then

willyule, he'll no I won't post on aibu! She is a loving grandmother but its so jarring to see her interact with little c in ways which seem totally wrong. We were out for lunch, she was holding the baby, who was a little bit fractious. I thought that she was due some awake time, and maybe just needed to be gently entertained and held comfortably. But MIL jogged her and burped her and jogged her and held her head tightly and baby stayed fractious ... Well, my husban leaned over and whispered 'Who do you think is more frantic, little C or my mum?'

This is on top of the usual frustratingness that is my MIL.

So nothing egregious, but I did want to snatch the baby off her and say 'do try to understand what the baby wants!' But now we're at home and feeding and maybe we'll have a nap.

Like I said 7 days...

Had a couple of 'firsts' - just got back from my first solo walk of any decent length with both DC (previous solo trips have been heavily car-based). DS1 was quite happy pushing the pram and now he's had some fresh air and exercise I feel less guilty about letting him chill out with a DVD while I mnet.

Also, pretty sure that N has started to smile. DH thought he saw it at the weekend, but I did the usual and said it must be wind. Last night however he really seemed to be doing it consistantly in response to being tickled. He was alsi doing it when I sang one of his daft songs to him earlier (though that probably was wind )

Spoilsport Mama . It doesnt have to be anythjng major though does it, over time it can get to you, especially when you havent slept. DP's grandad had hold of J on Christmas Day for over an hour and I wanted to snatch him back! He had his head bent under his arm and sat in an open drafty doorway. to make it worse BiL said "ooh he looks dead comfy there grandad" I wanted to scream "give me my baby!"

Aw how lovely Ispy how old is he now?

Spotty can you link to the leaving your baby thread? I can't find it.

Can't link on the app but it's in the parenting section fourth one down

I've currently got my tits out in the car park at Winchester Services - I figure if anyone has a problem they can start by writing to The Sun! My Dad was a bit odd at first, but has got used to it now he realises there's nothing to see. I just flap one side of my shirt down, latch on and go

pidj my DH is in Winchester today. He won't report you to the sun he was ready to punch some old guy at the train station for staring, even though there was nothing on show! Said to his brother at Xmas 'oh you'll have the joy of wanting to punch people that are staring at your mrs just trying to feed our baby'.

Dp is being pretty unsupportive of me breastfeeding. I know he doesn't mean to be but so far he's said:

When ds was unsettled 'oh we should have just bottle fed him'

And

'Ds slept really well after I gave him that bottle (120ml ebm) maybe he doesn't get as much feeding from you'

I'm probably overreacting but I think because I ff dd and she was such a calm, four hourly feeding baby who's never ill he thinks it's better than breastfeeding. If I say anything he just makes out that he thinks it's not fair I'm doing all the work. I know he hates that he can't settle him like I can

Not great news at the weigh in. Little Z has only put on 60g in a week so has dropped right off the lowest percentile. We're going to be referred to a paediatrician. He's still 6oz off his (admittedly possibly-incorrect) birth weight and he's 5 weeks old now.I hate the phrase "failure to thrive" - it just seems so loaded with value judgments about every aspect of a baby's upbringing.

At present he gets 3 (very occasionally 4) bottles of 90ml of formula a day, plus all the breast he wants spread out through the 24 hours. He's usually on the breast for a total of 7-8 hours a day (I have a timing app and I only count it when it's proper feeding not just the light sleepy suckling). I really don't know what I'm doing wrong. People have looked at the latch, and I can feel the breast lumpy beforehand and flaccid after the feed although It doesn't get lumpy more than once a day. But there's always milk when I squeeze it.

Seconds my niece was born with a shocking amount of hair, and at 10wks she still has it all, even had a hair cut!

F is staying with my in laws for an evening in mid February. Nearly left him with them for an hour on New Year's Day while we had lunch, but we could part with him!

seconds have you spoken to bfing specialists. I thought that formula has less calories for the amount they get so a greater proportion of breast milk would help more than upping the formula. (you are topping up to try and up his weight? If its another reason please ignore this I'm not trying to place guilt over not feeding just info I've been given)

Oh and spotty that's pretty crap. I'm sure your DH isn't trying to make you feel shit but I'm sure it doesn't help! I can see it frustrates my DH that he can't settle Ethan as well as I can (he holds him up to eye level and says 'look I'm the one who doesn't have the milk' ) but he's never even suggested formula (although this is his first dc so he doesn't have the experience to make a comparison).

stacey y the formula was originally 1 bottle at night to help us share the load a little but we then increased it to help up his weight. I am in tough with a lactation specialist who isn't one of the ones whose seen me feed but she did give me a lot of information to try to keep my supply going, such as feeding at night and feeding often and keeping him on the breast for 45 minutes and trying breast compression, all of which I've been doing. I've been really trying to keep the bottles down and even see if I can reduce them, but sometimes he breastfeeds for hours on end and isn't satisfied and the breasts have gone completely flacid, which is when I give in and give a bottle, and he takes it all even after hours of breastfeeding.

Oh bless the poor little mite. That doesn't sound like much fun for you seconds did they give any advice when they weighed him today?

Stacey not really, no - it was all about the next steps in terms of the paediatrician and telling me to arrange the 6 week developmental check. I just feel so sad that for whatever reason, he's not getting what he needs. His growth stagnated initially but he then had a good gain last week of 180g so I thought we'd reversed the trend and beaten it, but we haven't.

Maybe start a thread in Breast/bottle feeding and see if anyone has wise words to help you. It sounds like you're kinda being left with no support, which isn't going to help you or Z

great news pidj though I imagine it's going to be tough I'm sure you'll all pull through. good decision on the mixed feeds I reckon

congratulations Alison!

sorry to hear that seconds, it must be very worrying for you. I hope they can help you and z out soon.

welcome back bubbless! I too had experiences like yours so understand. don't be worried if those pesky hormones fool you into feeling like that again, they really do twist things and when things settle down you'll be fine. if not though do seek help asap

welcome too peony - motherhood is extremely perplexing (pregnancy sent me doolally too!) and mumsnet does help - many of us are great believers in 'gut instinct' and I'm learning that the boob pretty much solves everything at the mo! (I worry a bit though as he was very overweight at birth) I'm finding that demand feeding seems to be evolving patterns and I'm hoping to encourage those in the 'right direction' slowly rather than set a routine. (not for a while yet though - will see which way he goes!) I'm finding making sure I have my routines is the most important thing eg breakfast before 1 o'clock 9 am

willyule - I've an extra 5 days on your bathroom....

I'm very on your behalf spotty over the appointment mess abouts. hope sorts soon.

2/3 week wind issues here too - he's now 3+3 and it has calmed - lots odds ideas from you tube but sitting him up and stroking down his back has helped burp, then lying him down a bit before doing it again, and cycling and jiggling legs for wind. we tried infracol but I found it buggered his latch and he gulped more air. we were burping for a good 20+ mins but it's getting less now.

honey I have just counted 7 pillows in my bed (didn't know I had that many) originally to help prop up for feeds post .cs (1 to lay ds on for feeds and 2 for dpi so not they bad!) but now I stack them about me if I think we're going to nod off mid burp and he's on my chest and it works well.

Stacey great idea - I will do that.

seconds what about posting on the la leche league website forum? or trying various headlines again?