October 2012 babies part 2: winding, yawning and grizzling, and first smiles?

[YompingJo]

Part 2: in which our babies learn to sleep through the night and make us tea in the morning

Totally forgot my biggest news which is that suddenly, randomly, at 6 weeks and 2 days old, mini yomping slept from midnight until 5:30 . No idea whether it is due to trying gripe water, or to block feeding making her feel more comfortable as my milk supply has finally reduced, or an age or weight thing or some combination of all of those but it's awesome! And may well be a one off! But still awesome!

Yay Miniyomping!! Good girl sleeping for mummy!!!

hooray yomping!

and thank you for being so lovely bella

londonlivvy I use Lidl's bio liquid detergent and Lidl's version of Vanish. Works brilliantly! Not sure if you're meant to use bio liquid with babies but I don't find non-bio washes things properly, esp in a hard water area.

OMG DS just slept from 7.30-12.30 - went to bed early and got a great sleep! He only took half a bottle then so no chance of a repeat performance tonight! He must have tired himself out after 5 hours of non-stop grizzling, crying, eating and vomiting (thank god DMIL & DFIL were on hand to help, very grateful!!). Is this start of the 6 week growth spurt???

I also bought a great big PFB item today: a digital bottle warmer. DH and DMIL had both shot me down previously when I said I wanted one and that it was a waste of money, and DMIL was all like "what did people do before bottle warmers, boiling water in a bowl is fine". Yeah sure I agree but we have all been guilty (esp when tired) of heating DS' bottles to warm (sometimes rejecting them crying) and it was worrying me so much. So I don't give a shit that its not really necessary and was twice the price it is in UK/Ireland. It makes me feel so much better, is so easy and way faster than boiling water in a jug. So DH and DMIL can stick it, harrumph!

oh yeah livvy I use persil non-bio small and mighty. pricey but I really rate it. plus comfort pure.

Thank you for your kInd words bella

Poor midget you really get put through the wringer with everything don't you!? Hope you feel better very soon... second the comment about always grinning at your bear hug tackles (particularly as I visualise you as very small...)

Brave and honest words yomping and I really hope the doctor is helpful. I think the feelings you have are so common - I've certainly had the anger and frustration, and much more so before jess started smiling and interacting, and felt horribly ashamed - but completely understand with your history how much it must frighten you. Really sorry that you had to go through that as a kid.
For what it's worth, I hope it's just the normal feelings that I really think most mums must have, and that it lifts once the sleep and crying gets easier.

Second day of helping sis - I am so happy I managed to actually give her a 2 hr nap by taking the 2 yr old to the park when her baby fell asleep. I put jess in the sling (she slept) and ran around the park with him, he was so cute. There was a painting of a spider on a wall, and I said, "look at the giant spider Arthur!" and he looked a bit alarmed so I said, "it's ok, it's not real" and a few minutes later he said to me, "is Arthur real?" - which I thought was a brilliantly philosophical question for a 2.5 yr old!! We had a long discussion of what things were real and what weren't, mostly checking by poking them... Actually I love hanging out with him, he is so hilarious and fun and energetic and bold... babies are cute and all, but I really can't wait until Jess talks back :)

Fairly hilarious lunch with me and sis both with squirmy baby on our arm both feeling distinctly handicapped, and just as we finally managed to get food on the table (microwaved donated dishes from her mates!), nephew shouted I NEED A POO! NOW!

She looked better today - the first day without the boyfriend/husband is the worse, isn't it!? How the fuck do people do this single?

oh and yomping I hope the sleep is the first of many! jess went from 4-5 feeds a night to none overnight at around 6 weeks... Last night was pretty typical - boyfriend got her to sleep at 10pm (I was in bed) and she woke at 5.30am for a brief feed, with me lying down, then fell back asleep wihout needing changing or settling till 8am... i get up at half 6, this is how i am possibly hasving the energy to go for morning runs every day!

can I ask a couple of wee questions to those of you who are bfing?
how long does each feed last? my baby- almost 6 weeks old seems to be done after around 15 mins, sometimes coming back for another few mins after a break. never more than that though.
also how many poos are your babies now doing? mine is down to only 1 or2 a day, but still at least 10 or more wees. I did read somewhere that they start to do less poos because breast milk is so efficient that there is very little waste, bit I'm not sure if that's true or not.
I assume all this is normal as she's gaping weight well, but it's hard to know and I'm always paranoid that she might not be getting enough as she doesn't seem to feed as much as I thought they needed to.

londonmrs
our feeds last 10-15 minutes usually. every now and then she'll do a monster 45 min one. usually right before bed.
lots of poos here. 4-8 a day. but i believe less than that is more typical. I think bf babies can go a couple of days without and everything is fine, actually.
If she is gaining weight, alert, not dehydrated, weeing - all is well!!

only thing is she still won't sleep for more than 1 or 2, sometimes 3 hours at a time. I'm exhausted.

Londonmrss we went from 40 odd mins to 15 mins about 2.5 weeks ago. I was delighted. Since last Monday we went back to 40 mins odd again. Yesterday and today some back to 15. I'm just assuming this is all part of his growing cycle and him boosting my milk production when need be. We were on dirty nappies every feed, went down to a couple a day, yesterday there were 5 in morning and today thus far only 1!!!! Today mega massive heavy wee nappies. He slept loads yesterday and hardly any today..........

Basically I hav no idea what the hell to expect next but he is gaining, pooing, weeing and mostly sleeping so I am going with the flow!!

That probably does not help at all.......!

Sorry not to respond further back. So tired today. Hav even forgot to take stew out if freezer for dinner. Oops. Poor DH has to come home and cook, I can't even remember to open freezer!!! Looks like he will hav to properly cook. Oops.

londonmrss the paediatrician told me that babies empty the breast in 20mins max and said if he was still hungry after that to offer the other side. Sometimes Smorglet goes for longer but I think he's just comfort sucking. Also he sometimes doesn't poo for 2-3 days. But will then have some spectacular nappies. mickey he also gets pain if he hasn't been for a few days but I still don't know what to do about it. My cousin suggested the cooled boiled water thing but I haven't tried it yet.
squid nice to hear Jess went from many feeds to none overnight. Sometimes I think Smorglet has the most well tuned body clock ever, he wakes every 2 hours to feed. Was she having long naps during the day too?
yomping bless you, sounds like you've been having it really tough but as ever I admire your honesty and the fact that you are facing it straight on, admitting you might need help and doing something about it. I think its very common to feel like taking it out on your baby, and thats a very scary thing to feel. But you know in your heart that you wont, and that you are strong and intelligent enough not to let past patterns of behaviour in your family repeat themselves. Your DD is very lucky to have you as a mummy.

Nothing much to report here, but I am reading regularly and it's keeping me sane at night. Sister has gone home now, she was amazing - great company, lots of laughs and, remarkably, she was great with Smorglet and even managed to hold him and her gin at the same time.

Can I ask an odd question? What colour are anyone's nipples? Never paid mine any notice before but assume they were same brownish colour as areola. They are now always pink/red. My 'sore' side has feckin cracked again and giving pain. Good side is red and still bit tender. He def still latching poorly on sore side. Gah. Really, running out of willpower again.

huffle my nipples are like that too so hope that's normal!

yomping I think you're very brave, hope everything goes ok for you. I remember the first day dh went back to work I just put dd on the changing mat and sat in tears as I was so frightened I'd hurt her.

Continuing the saga of baby woolly's lack of weight gain saw the gp today who also weighed her - no gain in the last week and a half so he's told us that's failure to thrive and is referring us to the hospital. It's such an emotive term I feel really crap, I was so sure she would have gained and now I feel I've totally failed her. On top of that you just get different advice from everyone. Have posted about this on the feeding group so will hopefully get some advice.

yeah huffle mine are looking a bit pink. it might be nature's way of making the nip east to see to help baby latch. or it night just be the continuous sucking making them sore.

is anyone using gro bags yet? I've just put babylondon down in one for the first time and she looks really happy. she usually kicks of all covers or swaddling so hopefully this will keep her warm.
I want to celebrate a tiny victory today. even though sleep pattern is crap and she doesn't sleep for long, every time I put her down for a nap today she has been wide awake yet calm... and has settled herself to sleep within 10 mins without making a fuss. please tell me that's a good sign. frankly the sleep deprivation I'm suffering with is killing me.

London that is amazing re the settling to sleep!! Is there a secret?! Not in gro bags yet as DS not kicking blankets off yet. He still in basket and we r in a panic as nearly out of and we had planned to keep in til we move house!! We hav no room for a cot in this house!!! Not thinking about house move, too afraid to! Was the day sleep with blankets or bag? Dud u have quilted babygro type thing too to keep arms warm? Do u put bubs in bag before setting down? Sorry!! 20 questions!!!!! Feel free to ignore.

Wooly that is crap on the weight gain. What a crap bloody definition. Well, try not to worry about the description and lets see what happens next.

Feeling v v teary today. Cried all over DH when he got in. Must be the poor sleep. 7 weeks tmrw, I am convinced the hardest bits are nearly over.
Thank you for nipple reassurance! Now if someone can just call round for a cuppa and teach this boyo to latch properly again all will be well!

oh woolybob you poor thing That really is such an emotive term. Hope you're ok and that someone can help you. Really really big hug for you.

I basically kept her very entertained while she was awake- constantly talking and showing her things, then when she'd been awake for an hour and a half or 2 hours I just went quiet, held her and rocked so she was really calm, them popped her in her basket with a blanket over her. if she got upset at all I just picked her up and held her again for 5 mins then popped her back in.
I suppose the main difference is usually I just wait for her to fall asleep on me before putting her down as I assume she isn't tired otherwise but this time I decided it was time for a nap before she showed the signs. I'm not sure generally about the idea of structure rather than baby leading, bit some sort of combination seems worth considering.
now I just need her to sleep for longer. the last few nights it's been 2 hours max at a time and sometimes less than an hour so I'm only getting 3 or 4 hours sleep a night. which is apparently the same as Thatcher used to get. and I haven't attempted to privatise the nhs or destroy the working classes so it's not all bad.
i'll report how the sleeping bag goes after tonight.

woolly sorry to hear that- big hug for you. babies just grow at different rates so hopefully everything will be fine and they're just being cautious. does your baby seem happy and healthy?

Thanks guys. Yes london very happy and healthy. That's one of the most annoying things, I was really surprised she's not gained as she's outgrown her newborn stuff and we were saying at the weekend that some of the 0-3 looks too short now.

Hello yomping and everyone else!

I'm fine, but have been lurking for a while. It was around the time that zara et al were having major difficulties breastfeeding that I stopped posting... This is going to sound terribly self-absorbed, but... I suppose I felt I'd built up a reputation on here as fairly experienced and knowledgeable about it. And I felt awful that there was nothing much I could do to help the people having problems. You can't really advise on latching unless you're physically with someone. And there was, perhaps understandable, talk of 'breastfeeding nazis' and unreasonable pressure... And I thought, I don't want that to be me. I hadn't got time to be supportive and phrase things properly because I've got two DCs to look after, and they have first call on my energy and time. So I retreated. But I've been thinking about you all a lot.

DS is doing just fine. He is lovely and plump and has an adorable Fair Isle jumper on. It makes him look like a very fat extra in a Danish crime thriller. DD is still enjoying preschool (an angel in the nativity play. WTF?) but I am being a bad, impatient mother with her because I am tired and she is so demanding, without being intellectually challenging, IYSWIM. The 24/7 childcare is taking a toll - I haven't had a night off from both of them, let alone an hour, since DS was born ten weeks ago. R4 and conversation with DH preserves most of my sanity but the endless, repetitive questioning from DD is just so tiring. I seem to have infinite patience for DS. All he wants is milk and cuddles. I can do that.

More positively, my phantom weak knee, which has been very tiresome since soon after DS was born, turned out to be due not to MS but to a short left leg. A shoe insert has pretty much cured it. I am very, very happy about that.

Quick wave and run. Bean is 10 weeks! A double digit bean!

On less happy note am going back to gynae tomorrow as still bleeding (10 weeks of bleeding as well as 10 weeks of bean), they want to check there isn't another frigging clot. Gah!!!

for Yomping and anyone else having a shitty time.

Elpis glad to 'see' you :) You gave great advice but know what you mean,
we all have had to just struggle through and make it up as we go along. And love the Danish crime drama extra image... :o

londonmrss Feeds have always varied from around three minutes to an hour. They eat and drink at different rates - like the rest of us, really. I realise this is unhelpful but there's no such thing as abnormal when it comes to feeding patterns, I reckon.