October 2012 babies part 2: winding, yawning and grizzling, and first smiles?

[YompingJo]

Part 2: in which our babies learn to sleep through the night and make us tea in the morning

Smorgs, why is expressing painful? can I offer any advice? hope I'm not being pushy, it's just that I was exclusively expressing at first and still doing so several times a day. what kind of pump do you have?

DS has had quite a peaceful night, and his second dose of antibiotics. Very much hoping he doesn't develop thrush, because I always have during ABs and I know a couple of you ladies have had a similar experience. Yeast and sugar-free

He doesn't like it much when I massage around the abscess as instructed during a bath, but who would? Thinking of those on here who've had blocked ducts and mastitis... So lucky to have escaped without any of that. Feeding was sometimes painful during pregnancy, but that was hormonal so it was easier to grit my teeth and bear it. As londonmrss asks - is expressing painful because of cracked nipples, or do you have a lot of discomfort with letdown?

I consulted Dr Google and he was quite reassuring. Apparently it's overwhelmingly boy babies who develop a perianal abscess and only when they're toddlers is it sometimes an indicator of another condition.

DD still suffering with her flu, so we're going to have a quiet day at home. The thing about being in sole charge of a sick child is that you can't go anywhere except in an emergency. Managed to nip into the Co-op while waiting for the bus home from hospital yesterday and pick up bread and an expiring Bakewell tart... Ate half of it on the sofa.

DH left for work half an hour ago. He is miserable, but in a sad rather than bad-tempered way, which is easier to cope with. He did call me 'off-the-scale neurotic' when I was tearing up on the way to A&E yesterday. Why is it neurotic to be upset at the prospect of your DC being admitted to hospital? We really need more time together. I know exactly what you mean about losing touch with DPs because the baby comes first.

Oh ffs dh just woke him up getting ready for work grrr

Londonmrss Please do! I have a manual Phillips Avent pump and it feels like someone is sticking needles in my nipples. The other day I drew blood but it's better now. I'm just afraid it'll be really painful to breastfeed if I express again.

Zara If you do want to try relactating, it doesn't have to be total and you shouldn't worry about DS' frustration if he roots and can't latch on, as long as the episode doesn't last longer than a minute or two. My DS can't latch in the dark and roots about while I'm half-asleep, grunting and whingeing. It doesn't do him any harm. I know your experience with lactation consultants hasn't been good. Maybe when you get home you could take him to a La Leche League meeting, and see if the leader there can watch him try to latch on? Perhaps try the Medela Calma teat, which mimics the action of bfing? Some women try to restart their supply by expressing, but I wouldn't go down that road again right now. He likes being close to you and cuddling skin-to-skin, and if you can bear it I think it can do him no harm at all.

smorgs If you can afford it then I'd try an electric pump from a different brand. A good one shouldn't be squeezing your nipples, just stimulating the areola and pulling them out with the vacuum. Maybe the cone is too small? Electric ones are faster, which would help, too.

Smorgs I have Avent electric. BF co ordinator in hospital other week said often the attachments are just too small. She suggested in Phillips to remove the silicone inner 'petals' and this will make aperture bigger. Baby takes much more of breast in mouth. I tried and is more comfy. I hate expressing too, never comfy. Hav bought medela swing also. Her advice same there. Attachment with it too small, in hospital they up everyone to 30mm attachment. Even tho when I checked their site I thought I should go smaller........ Oh the confusion!! She also said to get suction right, go up to when uncomfortable them reduce again slightly. Are u pumping too hard? Do not need to fully squeeze the handle. Another MW advised this with manual: imitate baby a bit more; suck, suck, rest. Suck, suck,rest. She also said before u start to use back of nails to tickle breast slightly, touch areola lightly and nipple. This might help bring on let down faster. Oh and of course, r u looking at baby or pics of? I sit with sideshow on phone!

I am desperate to express again but no point currently due to thrush as cannot keep the milk.

DS been asleep over 8 hrs. Boob waiting on feed feels like might explode!

Hav not been good at keeping sugar levels down to help bloody thrush. I am an addict. And having chocolate ovaltine at night for few extra vitamins - might thus hav been the stupidest idea?? Is malt sort of yeast?? I have no idea!

Elpis so relieved nothing serious. Can I throttle your DH?? Neurotic??? Driving to hospital with newborn and scary pus???? Christ, if that doesn't warrant tears???

Sorry, mind blank, need to re read.............

Thanks elpis and huffle I wondered if electric ones were more gentle. I probably am pumping too hard it's just so difficult to produce anything - like getting blood out of a stone! Yes am doing it while he feeds or is nearby so I can see/hear him. But it's so uncomfortable I think it affects my letdown. God listen to me, there are people desperate to breastfeed and I'm wittering on about not being able to express.

Sorry your dh is so down elpis, I can't stand seeing men cry it breaks my heart. Then again he gets a black spot for telling you you're neurotic IMO. Unexpected puss should always warrant emergency medical advice I think!

Smorgs if u do go electric stay away from Avent! It is too cumbersome to use as motor is in handle. Medela swing not much more£ . I would also look at Spectra 3 or Ameda lactiline- I would hav liked this one. I bought medela stupidly in hurry from Boots but as going back to work so early id have been better with dual pump. Tho I hear suction goes down. Decided not to go for £45 monthly rental of hospital grade as need to use at work but still might. If I cannot restore normality to stupid boob with recurrent infections might hav to switch to ff anyhow. Can I exclusively feed on one side???!!! Think I might topple sidewards in the morning!!!

smorgs I found the Philips painful to. I hired a hospital grade medela symphony. here it's £45 per month but one of my cousins in France said there was some sort of system where hospitals can lend them out. worth looking into as its such a good pump. otherwise I've heard good things about the other medela ones.
also breast shells can really south your nipples and allow you to collect quite a bit of milk from them too.

not much sleep again for us. babyLondon actually didn't sleep too bad, just woke every 3 hours. but she squeaks and squawks all the time she's sleeping and I just can't sleep through it. would be a grumpy mummy today but every time she looks at me she gives me a big silly grin that I can't resist.
she's doing really stinky fats this morning. smells like a brewery in here. very yeasty. yum.

october!! You poor poor thng! Are you ok? That must have been tterly terrifying for you. Is babyOK? I bet your Dad felt terrible! Big hugs to you!! Xxx

sorry haven't caught up this morning, just a couple of questions while I bounce ds2 and ds1 watches tv...

ds2 wakes up every morning obviously hungry but screams when I try to feed him. I have to struggle every morning to settle him back to sleep, and he'll sleep for about 5mins then wake up and feed. it's unbelievably frustrating and just a massive waste of time too. he's currently screaming while i'm on my phone...

has anyone with a moby mastered feeding in it? can't get my head round it but would like to save hassle of getting him out then back in each time.

right back to focusing on not killing anyone. tricky when a baby is screaming in your face...

Check out Willow & Mickey going out on Sat night!! Whoop whoop!! Can I enjoy a night vicariously with you? Feel like I will never go out again!!! Brilliant, enjoy yourselves!!

Londonlivvy I was thinking about you and reflux few days back. I was googling that controversial discussion on food and baby wind. I found a v interesting article saying that no way can food which makes us windy make baby windy due to our digestion but actual foodstuffs can cause intolerances and reflux. Main one being dairy. God, I was copying it to post and obviously something distracted me. Grrrrr Well I'm sure you've read anything I've read!!! But the important thing was to be careful with own nutrition.

Wanted to reply more but need to run and wash, breakfast, tidy house and get dressed before DS wakes again from morning nap!! Approx 30 mins to go if I'm lucky!!!

Happy Friday all!

And oh no October that is awful! Hope everyone ok. Gah.

Thanks for all the advice ladies. I'll definitely check out that pump lending thing londonmrss. Amazing how quickly you can go from feeling positive to utterly negative isn't it? So exhausted this morning I feel like tripe.

cherry just seen the news can't remember where you are in Japan but hope everything ok.

October Is baby ok?!

Zara what a horrible feeling. If he is still trying to latch could you keep giving him the opportunity? With the mindset that it is for comfort/ just to see if he wants to, rather than for food? You can still do lots of lovely skin to skin, have baths together and do baby massage to keep that physical warmth and love alongside FF.

Am still pulling my hair out over bottle refusing DD, why dont they ever fit in with our feeding plans?!

DH is a nobber. nobber nobber nobber. after I took most of the night shift, he commented this morning that it can be a bit stressful sometimes cooking home from a long day art work to find the flat is quite messy.
nobber. I sleep on average 4 his a night compared with his 7 hours because he's has to drive inn the morning. I look after our 6 week old and when she settles for a nap, I run around trying to sort the sterilisDr, do the waking up, make the bed that he slept in while I was trying to south or baby, sort out what we'll eat for dinner, get showered and dressed and... oh baby is awake again, no time to finish my shower or get dressed.
yesterday I threw away a plate because I accidentally dropped it in the bin when I only had one hand available so couldn't fish it out and then I just didn't have time so I left it there. does he think i spend all day sleeping? I always mean to have a nap but never once have I had time.
I don't mean to suggest that he doesn't do his bit because he's a brilliant dad and a lovely supportive husband. but I'm doing my best and I don't deserve criticism. sometimes it's like he thinks the housework is done by fairies. nobber.
sorry for moaning, it just really upset me when I'm trying so hard. god I shouldn't be moaning at all when some of you have more than one child and much more to deal with!

Christ still can't get used to the stupid phone predictive text. sorry that my messages don't make sense any more.

No London, moan away! What a total nobber! Has he ever taken over total care of baby for a day? Prehaps he has slighly unrealistic expectations of what a baby does all day. I hope you ripped into him!

no I pretty much just burst into tears...

Aaaargh. Speechless Londonmrs when I hear such nobber behaviour. Try try try and make him do as much baby looking after as possible at weekend. Stupid feckin bloke. No doubt he is lovely and great dad in his way, but they r so feckin clueless at times.

You show him......... Take a day off!!

Well that probably got the messege accross to!

Blimey londonmrss that's pretty shit, especially first thing in the morning after a sleepless night. Second what huffle said, I think they just don't get it sometimes. Dh asked me to iron some of his shirts the other day 'when you've got time today...' I laughed in his face. He also asked if I just sit and play with Smorglet all day when we were playing with him at the weekend during a rare quiet alert moment 'is this what you do all day when I'm at work?' Yes darling, the baby soothes, feeds and changes itself and dinner is made by the house elf and by the way would you like me to put a ribbon in my hair for when you come home? Nobber.

Ha ha hah hah Smorgs........! Is this what you do all day?? Honestly. They all need a day ALONE with bubs!!! They'd be wrecks!!

My DH not too bad as I had those 2 days in bed week before last. He was a mess of exhaustion and didn't even hav to feed! But even now it is remarkable how easily he decides to put DS in swing to stop him crying!!

nobbers

Hi everyone

We had our six week check (even though DD is actually 7 weeks). GP very pleased with her progress, said she's strong with good muscle control. I already knew that what with all the head butting she does. And she farted all the way through the examination... She is truly her father's daughter!

We talked about how I've been feeling and she'd already spoken to my health visitor who told her she felt I was putting a brave face on and not admitting how bad it really is. She said I'm suffering from PND and social isolation. She said its a chemical imbalance and we can nip it in the bud it's medication. She's given me two months of Prozac which I'm a little wary of taking but started taking it yesterday. I'm worried the side effects may make me feel worse initially but I will give it a go.

My goodness - what a traumatic 24 hours, epilis + october hope beans are ok.

zara your posts make me . Totally sympathise but important thing is you are looking after bean and making them big and strong by whatever means necessary. Don't know if this helps but when bf lady came to visit and we were discussing supplementing dd she suggested to hold bottle under my arm parallel to boob - would this work for you? Could be a way of getting the skin to skin and closeness of bf position without the frustration?

huffle was looking up one sided feeding this as dd started refusing left boob this am. According to kellymom perfectly possible (which would make sense or how would you feed twins?) but yes does result in lopsidedness so you might end up walking in circles...

We are doing ok, have started giving one bottle of formula a night and have appointment with paeds Monday am so will see what they say.

Sorry to hear about all the nobberish other halves, DH made one of his hilarious 'jokes' about how few thank you cards I'd written last w/e and I shoved dd at him and suggested he have a go making lunch one handed, of course when I went in the kitchen she was happily cooing away in her bouncy chair while he microwaved soup. Got the last laugh thou, just as we sat down to eat she did one of her trademark baby gro filling pops. Don't think he dared ask me to take care of it...