October 2012 babies part 2: winding, yawning and grizzling, and first smiles?

[YompingJo]

Part 2: in which our babies learn to sleep through the night and make us tea in the morning

Wow, how fast things move and change for everyone - ups and downs, positives and struggles, it is so good to be on this path with everyone so thanks for telling your stories

Hugs to those having troubles and when things look up. Erin is being a pest tonight - she just won't settle unless I stand and shake pram or carry her around and my arms/back are aching (DH is out tonight so can't even pass her on). We had such fun earlier when she was kicking in front of the fire with no nappy, then she fed and fell asleep but she's really grouchy now and it's so hard when I'm tired...

She's so heavy now - she weighed 10lb 6oz at 4 weeks (born 7lb 12) - must train her to self sooth to nap as I'll get arms like a weight lifter... eyes water that some people have a 10lb baby at birth though...

huffle

Huffle. Hurrah to BF lady. That is ACE news. Yay.

... just picked Erin up and she was sick loads - all down my back and the sofa, that's why she wouldn't sleep then sigh

Katla that is some weight gain!! Brilliant!! Have HV coming on Friday and am intrigued to know what feeding monster is!! He was 10 8 week and half ago, goodness knows!!

Livvy so delighted u hav 2 nights help this week!!!!! That is truly truly brilliant, make the most of it! As for the formula, I did learn early on that crying is often hunger and if u are feeling empty, you need to feed baba. The better the weight gain the better will settle too, so do not feel bad. Given my last few days drama I intend to do whatever I need to do to keep baby fed ad me sane. Both are totally necessary! I imagine we will hav more than the odd FF in this house.

Congrats Squid!! Tho I cannot find post announcing arrival of Bruce it nephew!! Hope everyone ok

Hugs to allxx

YAY huffle - so very very pleased!!! It's amazing how different "experts" fail to pick up stuff. Sometimes I wonder if I just needed the right advice on how to get him to latch TBH... But there's a limit to how many ppl you can pay for help...!

squid happy days on the new arrival!

congrats auntie squid

well done huffle hope this makes all the difference for you.

So glad you have some help livvy. For me, even knowing some help is round the corner helps me keep my pecker up so much!

smorgs I am sorry you had a bad day-don't apologise for meltdowns! Hugs to you.

I am worn out (for a change) Been really trying to just enjoy the good bits and not stress and worry my way through this precious time. So when I am up in the night, I have been admiring his little hairy ears and stroking his gorgeous soft hair and trying not to stress too much about how long the feed was taking. Had a pretty good day today really, had my Mum here for most of it which was fantastic, but I feel a bit depressed at how difficult it is to manage them both alone. dH gets in at 11pm three nights a week so I have to get better at managing them. DS2 is awake almost all day and while I am glad he knows his night from day, it is hard that he seems to cry a lot of the time when he is not feeding so I feel like I just feed him loads. But then I can't get DS1 out of the bath or dressed with only one hand so I have to sometimes let him cry while I take care of DS1 who is so touchingly patient and lovely with DS2 that I could cry. But I just feel so bad that I can't do anything like as much with him as I used to. Sigh. He is always saying to me 'I love you so much Mummy, will you always love me?' and I have to reassure him millions of times a day that I love him and always will. And it feels like every time I start feeding, he announces that he is desperate for the toilet. Potty training has always been a nightmare so keen not to make that any worse. I am so sorry to be whinging as I am actually OK today, not cried even once! I just know how quickly my baby disappeared last time and I really want to make the most of it and enjoy it, but instead I feel stressed all the time to try and please them both or in a rare moment that they are both asleep try and achieve those impossible goals like washing my hair/tidying the kitchen etc. And I look like total shit. I am wearing bf vests and big shirts every day as not great at discreet feeding and I just look so pale and worn and haggard. Interesting to read about you guys considering resuming your sex life-I love and desire my husband very much, but I feel so so unsexy, fat and like a walking milk machine that I really could not face sex even if my bits were better or we got any time together! Makes me a bit sad.

In other news-is anyone else still on lactulose? I am in a really bad way down there still! Not nice.

Love to you all. Good luck with nightshift!

xxx

bella am still on lactulose! Also no way wanting a penis in my vagina... Birth was four weeks ago on weds. Fear of pregnancy enough to keep me in my giant comedy pants. Oh, i got my dp to check lady bits healing yesterday. It made him a bit horny. Am not even joking.......

Bit of shit day. my 9 year old dd has vomming bug. Ewan the sheep no fucking help then!!

Brill news squid and huffle :-)

Masses of luck for tonight all round

thanks Anne, that made me laugh! Do you just have the two children or more? How is your 9 year old coping? Sorry that she is ill! Horrid. Ewan should have a function to clear up sick.

crazy I meant to sympathise on what you had written on juggling two of them. Sounds like you are doing an amazing job juggling it all. Xxx

and Livvy you seem to have a really impressive routine to your day. My days are all pretty haphazard-maybe because the baby has to fit around ds1 a bit more. And there is no pattern to the feeding at all. Am I alone in that? I haven't even had a go at expressing yet as he doesn't seem to stop feeding long enough for me to try. He sleeps in the car but then I am busy driving.

Jabs done, poor bean shrieked but cheered up after a feed. She is a bit unsettled tonight but might just be because she didn't get much sleep today. She's feeding like a fiend too!

Congrats to Auntie Squid :) And sympathy to Crazy and anyone else juggling two And cheers for Yomping and Huffle but equally Zara you are right. BFing may be good for babies if it's going well but suspect it can be quite bad for mothers. I started a thread in BFing to ask if people gave it up sooner than planned and how they felt about it and some of the horrendous things people went through before finally jacking it in made me that I was thinking of quitting 'just' for agonising blocked ducts The pressure is ridiculous. Last night and today were great because ducts are clear and everything is flowing but I keep wondering how long I have till the next lot - an hour? A day? A week? A month...?

Here's to quiet nights all round...!

For anyone not on the FB group, MickeyTheShortOne had her baby!
Welcome to the postnatal group Mickey, when you get the chance to join us.
In an uncharacteristically positive move, IO'd like to take a tiny moment to celebrate the fact that we all made it here. The journey was difficult for some of us, more difficult for others- but all our babies arrived safely. Good news.
Huffle, can I ask how you are strict about sleep during the day? I don't know how I'd stop mine from sleeping during the day- she's so relaxed that even a nappy change or stripping her doesn't piss her off enough to keep her awake- ~I'd have to fire cold water at her every hour I think...
Bella, I'm still having poo problems. I've started having lots of ground flaxseed in yoghurt and on cereal and it has really helped.

yes London I throroughly agree. I think it is wonderful that all our babies are here safely. I remember when we first started the thread and during the first trimester we lost a few friends who had miscarried. I still think about them sometimes and wonder if they have concieved again. It is sad to think that they would have been going through all of this with us just now but they are not. I feel hugely fortunate to have a healthy baby and am so glad every one of us have made it from the AN thread to the OTHER SIDE! Glass of champagne all round I think! Xxx

Lovely sentiments LondonMrss & I couldn't agree more all round!!

Lovely sentiments LondonMrss & I couldn't agree more all round!!

I got an ErgoBaby carrier over the weekend & used it yesterday with great success - I know I'm a bit late asking but has anyone got one of these? Baby Loopy didnt want to put his legs inside the insert so left them outside which he then bent anyway - is this ok?? He didn't cry & in fact slept for a an hour & a half, I guess he would have cried if uncomfortable?

Kyyria just wondering if you're ok love? Big hugs to you if you're reading but not posting x

Hi girls. Will be on to post more later, but just wanted to say i have joined your ranks! I gave birth to an eye-watering 10lber aby girl by name of Pippa Maxie Heidi on sunday at 22.56. Birth was straightforward as anything- the aftermath however was not. Hopefuly we will be discharged from hospital today!x

Yay Mickey!!!!!! Welcome to motherhood!! Lovely name, welcome Pippa!! Big baby, hope u ok chicken, do take best care of yourself possible. X x

Other news. Went to bed with chill, awoken with fever, hot sweats and pain in breast...... Can only be mastitis!!!! Is there anything else can be thrown at me??

DH off to out of hours to pick up antibiotic. I am actually strangely unperturbed. Whatever next?! Maybe been brewing for while and adding to my pains?

Londomrss I tried to be strict about day sleeping at start, thinking i would create a routine, but discovered when I let him sleep more during day he slept longer at night!' guess he was overtired.

My torture way to waken was to lift out of wherever sleeping and change nappy. But just created a cross baby!! Not sure if would even work now anyhow as sleeps so deeply!

Just pumped 180ml off sore side. Sweet Lord. I've prob brought this mastitis on myself with all this feckin about with expressing and formula and boob not been emptying properly. As of today with new advice hav to get baby feeding on this again!! The joys the joys!!!

DH will hav to stay home today, right? Mastitis = poorly therefore lots of rest?? Stay in bed and just be feeding machine?? If I didn't feel so shit I'd be delighted!!

so happy for you mickey and looking forward to hearing all about it xx

huffle i can not actually believe you are suffering even more, you poor thing. Those boobs of yours ey? When i had ds i had a nightmare bfeeding and I remember feeling that I had barely given my nipples a second thought through my whole life, but that at that time, they bloody well ruled my life! I second what everyone says about poor antenaatal preparation about bf. I did try to say as much on the antenatal thread, but didn't stress it too much as didn't want to seem all doom and gloom. I wish they didn't make out that because it is a 'natural ' that it is easy, or has any relation to the connection between Mum and baby. Like you say, we would still have a go but wouldn't put this huge pressure on ourselves.

Mickey you made it! Congratulations!

Livvy dont feel bad! You're not inadequate at all. I would say that your boobs are never empty, even if they feel very soft and you cant express from them your baby will still be able to get milk so that might save you faffing with sterilisers in the future. Also, if she is needing more, you need to feed more or your supply wont build up to match what she needs, then you'll have to rely on formula. That said, One bottle of formula a day does not make you a bad mother, it makes you a great mother! Your doing what works for you.

Loopy I have an Ergo and I love it. DDs is so tall that her legs come out the leg holes already, even though shes 'supposed' to still be curled up.

Infact, she is so freakishly tall that she cannot wear 0-3 babygrows with feet, she needs footless ones or 3-6 months . Didnt expect this, I'm only 5"3!

I'm trying to get the hang of feeding in it but she is way to high up, so I have have the straps really loose which makes my neck hurt. I'm considering a ring sling for BF in.

Usually I find it very comfy.

huffle Im so glad you got some decent support with BF but cant beleive you have mastitis now, bloody sod's law! You will be an expert in solving BF problems though...

I'm having a bit of a dilema over DDs name. Her name is Artemis Lily and before she was born her nn was always going to be Missy, but now I find myself calling her Arty all the time instead. She just is an Arty. Is it a bit weird to tell people Ive changed her nn?

Im supposed to be going xmas shopping today, lovely weather for it ...

Cheers peeps. After lovely BF lady visited (all volunteers, remarkable) I am more determined than ever and not feeling too phased by this. Prompt treatment should make it bugger off so hopefully not major at all!

Wantan I am impressed by your tall girl!!! And you on ly 5'3! Remarkable!! Our wee man is so tall too, but we are 6' and 6'6 so totally expected. I just adore babygros and think they should be comfy wardrobe staple for months! But his legs are too long for most 0-3 and 3-6 still too big so will end up in suits and socks!

Did anyone ever hear that is totally bad idea to put anything other than socks on babies feet? Friend with wee boy was advised this by podiatrist friend. Especially when learning to walk. Affects how they feel and interact with surfaces. I was adamant I'd follow this but if little man not in babygros he will get cold feet!!!!!

So true Bella, 'natural' yes, 'unprepared for' totally!!!! And wasn't it u asking about lactulose? Yep, still on, fibogel too. Totally afraid to stop......... Tho if my haemoglobin up I will stop taking iron, move on to spa tone or fluoradix and see if that helps. I have not looked down below, hav no intention of directing DH to look and on absolutely no hurry to have any thing anywhere near my bits in the foreseeable future!!! And how the hell would we conjur up the time or energy anyway??? I admire anyone with a live libido. Mine is hibernating!! Never mind feeling like a cow with my bloody udders out half the time. DH insists they look sexy, I think he's trying to keep me sweet!!!

Loopy thank you for your congrats to us all for getting here! I too often think of ladies who disappeared along the way and the heartache they must feel, we whinge and feel sorry for selves (looking pointedly at self here....) but we are still so lucky and fortunate to hav come out the other side avec beautiful healthy babies. Three cheers and million hugs for the October crew!! May we continue to support each other so well as our lives continue to change!

DH took DS with him, look how I can catch up with no baby to care for??!
Really must go to sleep, head throbbing and really feeling shitty.

Take care girls, love to all.

Ps Mickey if u about, don't read our moans about early weeks!! Take it as it comes and when you need to vent or ask for advice u can guarantee one of us has been there already!!! Enjoy little Pippa, lovely!! Xx

huffle I wouldnt put shoes on a baby, mostly because its a PITA but I think soft booties, before they are walking are fine. I've been putting DD in babgrows without feet, with tights underneath. Could you get some tights for DS (in neutral colours)?

Yep Wantan will be getting some tights for winter!! Funny in UK we assume tights for girls but to my memory European kids wear them, boy or girl! Remember baby boys wearing in France when I was au pair and certainly we had polish friends who put them in little boy.

I need to learn my lesson about preaching about things.... Made such a fuss to mum and MIL about not buying bootees for DS as they bad idea but cannot give him cold feet!!! Hmm, will be interesting!

Mickey, huge congrats. and goodness, 10lb baby! wow. very very impressive.

Ah thanks wantanorange. I thought if I squeezed and nothing came out then there was no more milk. Definitely don't want to faff with formula more than once a day - and that's more of an insurance policy for the future or if I'm ill etc.

I have expressed this morning for the maternity nurse tonight. Lordy. How any of you do this expressing regularly I have no idea. First of all it does nothing for my feelings of attractiveness - I feel like a cow, and secondly, even if you do one boob whilst you feed on the other there is way more faff with sterilising etc. gah. So full respect to those ladies like huffle who are persisting with feeding and expressing. I'd have been on the gin by now.

And huffle, so sorry to hear re the mastitis . You really have not had a lot of luck with those boobsof yours.

Bella, I'm a big OCD so routine helps me and she seems happy with it too. It doesn't always work but she loves the bath and sleeps longer afterwards so I try to stick to that bit at least. Certainly a lot easier when you have no other children though.

Very excited at prospect of sharing a bed with DF tonight. Not for any monkey business, mind, but sleeping able to reach out and touch him... Awww. What a lovely thought.

Chuckling re these v tall babies. Tis funny isn't it to see the variations already. DD has long legs but a short torso so has her feet straining against e bottom whilst the torso is all baggy. Hum. Will have to find a better solution later!