November 2012 - babies are here at last

[StuntNun]

This is the post-natal club for graduates of the November 2012 intake.

chick I think it is worth giving the odd bottle of expressed, then it means you can go out for the day if necessary. You do not want baby to completely lose the skill. It is worth having a couple of bottles in the freezer in case you are unwell or called on an emergency.

When I struggle with feeding, which happens even with third babies as it is hard work, I think of my grandma 79 years ago, who fed triplets, all premmies, my dad being the smallest. She was told to let the little one go and concentrate on the other two. She gave him extra feeds. If she can do that, I can feed a healthy term singleton.

I managed a conversation with MIL today who had called asking how the weigh-in had gone. She is very anti bf, but she did not say anything other than kind supportive things. She has finally learned

My boy is out for a walk in his pram with a very proud daddy. The school run. What an ordeal for a 7 day old baby. I miss him! (The baby, not the daddy!). He is all registered, child benefit claim put in etc.

My boss wants me to go into work next week for a meeting. He knows I have just had a baby via section. Any suggestions as to how I should word my reply?

Rearrange as required.

Off fuck.

HTH

Oh detective, i do enjoy your advice

How would you interpret 'paternal leave'? Is it a holiday for DH to do what the fuck he wants, or is it time off so he can support his wife with caring for the newborn, helping with the housework, looking after the other kids, possibly even looking after his wife as she recovers from a major op? Or playing with ducking computer games while DW does everything else?

No particular reason for asking as my husband would never be so bloody selfish. Or so I thought.

Ducking computer games. Clearly I meant FUCKING!

I remember once going to the fuse box and turning all the electric in the house off.

I seem to also remember that the 4 hours of 'work' DP had been doing on his 'computer' also died at the same time.

Just a musing really....

I'm so done with all the washing of the bottles and the sterilising of the bottles and all the extra stuff that comes with bottle feeding. Its all too much especially at night time. He's only started taking the breast properly recently so I kind of want to run with it. And I really haven't got the time to express as much as I would like.

I had such plans for today, was going to put the pram together, do LOADS of washing sort out Holden's room, put up the cot bed, decide on a sling and buy Holden a coat. I've done nothing apart from Holden's clothes and he's wearing the last baby gro that fits him, so had to really. I have others but they will be huge on him.

Think I was being a bit optimistic.

Changed baby's nappy and her poo seemed quite liquidy and runny, should I worry?

chick by saying the odd bottle, I meant a couple of bottles a week. I hate the sterilising, but apparently with bm you do not need to sterilise. I always did though.

DH also took baby out without the raincover for the pushchair. We live in Scotland. It is November. He took his coat off so baby was fine, but he was drenched. Cue man flu. No doubt.

I've carefully folded both the car seat raincover and pram raincover in the basket under the pram. I hope to god DP can't forget to take them. But he probably will..... I have low expectations

Sorry too tired to read all your posts but please don't get pressured into topping up with formula unless you are convinced by the health professional not because of some arbitrary 10% rule. Most women produce enough milk for their baby; if a mother can exclusively bf twins then you can produce enough milk for your singleton. I really hate all this pressure that is applied to vulnerable women in the first few days after birth. You need to look at the health of your baby first and foremost. Please remember it is your decision how you feed your baby and noone else can force you to do different. Also remember that babies are supposed to lose weight in the first days after birth, that's why they are born with fat reserves.

Nervous is she bf or ff? If bf, then that is fine, if ff I haven't a clue. How is she in herself?

chick possibly a bit optimistic. DS has been in 3-6 clothes as I ran out. It is amazing how much washing they produce. He is getting through the gro bags too. I washed 4 and used all 4 in one night with two leaky nappies (bloody Huggies, now in washables) and two milk dribbles (fussy mummy).

Am loving the washables and gro bags.

valium she is BF and she seems normal, has slept abit longer then normal past one of her feeds but we were in the car and she tends to sleep constantly when were in that

Shelly re your comments on pg 16 Thankyou so much for them because considering this is dc4 but she was she was born early I have felt so pressured re her weight because she is putting it on slowly ...the midwife is coming again tomorrow to weigh her because she still wasnt her birth weight last friday and Im cacking that she might still be and pound or two off tomorrow but she is getting there at her own pace and im continueing to bf ....I too was astonished that they wouldnt let us leave hospital until she had 2 bottles which she only had 20ml of formula and chucked it straight up bless her...but the fact that her weight has been slow to put on but she is a very happy baby tells me not to top with formula...so in other words i wish my midwife would just discharge her tomoorow and piss off because she has stressed me out and dd will be 4wks old on sunday. rant over and thanks again shelly.

So I have a rare baby. He does all the right moves our positioning is correct, he just will no latch on and then screams blue murder.

Gutted doesn't even come close. I have things to try etc but she basically said don't get your hopes up. Keep expressing it's good for him.

Feeling very anxious tonight, but think I'm over tired but can't nap in the day my brain goes into over drive. I know I'm being stupid, I'm just so disappointed but the lady was lovely and basically said you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. Dh then informs me he was exactly the same so his mum had the same issues.

Need to lower my pulse rate and calm down. I can do no more than I'm doing apart from sit and feed my baby and not feel bad for sleeping. It's so hard when I'm used to doing so much.

Right might have another good howl while dh goes out!!

Horsey sorry if I've missed this but he has been checked for tongue tie?

Tongue is fine. There's no reason other than I think my milk doesn't come out instantly when he's by my breast. Guess that's having a bottle early. Who knows, we may get it established, I need to think that it may not for my own sanity.

Anyway expressing as much as possible to feed him breast milk. Other feeds he'll need formula until I can match his needs. So he may be bottle fed but as much breast milk as possible and continuing skin to skin. How long this will last for I don't know.

Oh horsey I am so sorry to hear that. That must be very upsetting, and hopefully things will improve, but it seems sensible to prepare yourself for a long and meaningful relationship with a pump. Interesting DH had the same thing. Hopefully this shows you it is not your fault, and it is not his. Take comfort that you can still feed him your goodness, but it is a shame it has to go through a bottle. I know it will be cold comfort, but a friend of mine who fed her first three children had a major motorbike accident and burnt her breast tissue and nipples off. She had another child and the milk came in what was left of her breast, and she was gutted as she could not get it out. She had accepted she could not feed, but had not expected milk. I wish you both all the very best.

Vq he mews and nuzzels around my breast opens his mouth and screams!!! Were lying here now, he's not hungry as only just fed but were doing skin to skin and he just repeats the cycle. I'm worried he's not as full after breast milk but were giving him slightly more than formula however he could just be repeating last nights performance but earlier!! Which would be ok!!

So he is crying because he wants your boobie, not because he is scared of it. Have you posted on the bf board? There are some very experienced folk on there who may have some tips. Never worry about him not being full enough on bm compared to formula. It may be true, but it is not an problem. He just needs feeding sooner. Enjoy the skin to skin x

horsey sounds like my LO. Shakes his head around nipple mouth open then screams. He has drank once tho (well I think he did because he slept for nxt two hours. N he has latched on twice but not drunk any milk, just sucked for an hour!

But I think I've given up on the feeding from me thing. Just going to express.

Vq where are the breast feeding boards?

Were currently doing skin to skin, offer breast, calm down, offer breast again, calm down give half feed, wind, offer breasts, he doesn't scream then just lies looking at it mouth open, you put it in his mouth but he doesn't latch on or suck. He just lies. Then he finishes off the bottle after a change and is offered the breast again. Then I pump. I offer the breast when he wakes between feeds too. Every time he does what he should do apart from latch on!!! We've tried and tried,

I think He has colic too, which doesn't help.

Horsey - I'm no expert on this - but have a google for Cranial Osteopathy. I wonder if this may help him?

I wonder if he is in pain, or associating pain with feeding, or maybe the action of trying to go on the breast hurts him. After all, the suck at a breast is different from the action of sucking a bottle...

Like I say, I'm no expert on this, but have heard a few things in my time about it.

Sorry so many people are having feeding problems. It strikes me a lot of this is due to hospitals keen to get people home regardless if they are confident on bf. l find that really sad. Thechick my Lo had a tube then bottles of expressed stuff and the odd bf, then l did the cold turkey thing thedetective recommended and just bf on demand and it worked well. He has one exprseessed bottle a day cos he needs vits/iron giving iin it. Dh does it around midnight which is great.

Really excited cos just ordered some teenyfit reusable nappies. He only has 3 that fit him at the moment and on average gets through them in 2 hours! We are on washable wipes tho and l love them so much ~can?t believe irs taken me til dc3 to realise there is an alternative to cotton wool/ disposable ones!