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October 2012 babies - we meet them at last!

999 replies

YompingJo · 12/09/2012 18:48

Getting thread in place in readiness!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Angelico · 02/11/2012 10:20

Oh no, sending a hug to Livvy, Huffle, Smorgs and Bella for the shit nights. It is totally soul-destroying when you're so tired and the bean won't sleep. Is there any way DHs can sleep in another room with baby and just bring baby in for feeds so you can sleep without having to settle her? That's what we do when there's been a rough night or two...

Livvy on white noise thing - Ewan the sheep has worked wonders for us so if you have £23 spare I would give him a go. It really seems to depend on the beans but ours loves it - we use 'womb noise' at night / nap time and the harp music when she's just chilling out in her little chair. Also the detuned radio is great. It's annoying for a few nights but weirdly you do get used to it and I usually turn it down when she's asleep. It's also good for covering baby noises (little snuffles and snorts) that would jerk me awake... unless it has been a very noisy night like last night!

Squid I had a night like you - although shouldn't complain because she was great until 05:00, had a nice feed - then snorted and snuffled like a baby elephant until 07:30! Confused For once even the blessed white noise didn't cover the sounds - and of course I pinged awake every time there was a huge grunt!

Wooly glad the antibiotics helped :) My boob feels like a boob again rather than a nobbly squidgy ball of agony!

londonlivvy · 02/11/2012 10:47

I am keeping a diary of feeds and poos and for the first couple of days she mostly slept in between each feed. But it's all change now... So I think I'll add that info in, to see if I can make head or tail of it.

DF is around but mostly she doesn't want cuddles, she wants food, so it doesn't help. ARGH. Anyway, I will be asking him to see if he can seek out newborn dummy (thanks for the brand suggestion, smorgs) today, to see if tonight can be less bad.

Just had comedy situation of trying to feed whilst getting coursework feedback from my Pre/Post Natal Yoga Instructor Course Director. Bean decided to howl inconsolably 5 minutes before the scheduled call, with perfect timing! Still, just about managed a sane conversation and YAY I have passed!!! I shall now be fully qualified and able to teach next year.

I tried a white noise app on my phone at about 4am and it had no effect - seems to just be a sucking desire thing - so may not go for Ewan yet (though he remains on my "save for later" amazon list!).

cherry I am with you on the nothing to wear camp. I had bought a couple of tops to wear but with my ENORMOUS boobs (bursting out of 32J) everything is pulling unattractively. Unfortunately DF is a slim cyclist build (65kg on a bad day) so I can't borrow any shirts from him. Must do some internet ordering when I have mojo - thinking of H&M.

hufflepuffle · 02/11/2012 11:22

Yay Livvy!!!! Namaste !!!!!! Brilliant news on yoga course! Well done, dont know how u managed it with pregnancy!

Just a quick update....... Is there a point to this feeding frenzy??? Yes. MW just weighed DS. Wait for it .......9lb15. Birth weight was 9lb 3 and he is 16 days old....... Sweet lord. She was so pleased. Said practically unheard of. I am stunned!!! Got a reproving look when I asked was it too much.........

Well the dairy well and truly functions then! Cheered me up rightly!

Sorry not to catch up with everyone else. Hope u all managing! Xx

hufflepuffle · 02/11/2012 11:22

Oh and no cuddles here either Livvy. Makes us both bit sad. But assuming they will come as he settles more

londonlivvy · 02/11/2012 12:17

Bloody hell huffle! Respect on yr milk production powers. Definitely worth it then!

Cherrychopsticks · 02/11/2012 13:20

That's great Huffle, good job Mummy!

Congrats on the course Livvy, it's all the more fantastic as you did it while heavily pregnant. Wish I could take your class!

Should have said earlier, welcome back Kyyria, sounds like you had an awful time. Glad you're feeling better. It's good to hear from you.

Just had a house full of visitors and Cherry Baby was amazing, passed around like a parcel, awake the whole time and didn't cry once. I think he likes the attention.

londonlivvy · 02/11/2012 15:03

Thanks cherry.

I just went to H&M to place an order and learned Estimated delivery date of 24th Dec. Excellent. So have gone for something from mothercare and hope it'll be ok. I need something to contain these monster boobs and enable me to leave the house with dignity when finally I have had some sleep to feel like doing so. I'm going slightly stir crazy at not having left the house since Sunday. Still, patience, etc, patience.

Mini dummies for mini baby on order so hopefully that'll be genius.

Right. Feeding time at the zoo now.

WantAnOrange · 02/11/2012 15:41

I have a question. Do any of you use a ring sling? I have an Ergo and I love it but can BF in it (even though they say you can BF in one). Would a ring sling be a better option do you think? Or something else?

Also does anyone have one of those swings that rock your baby? Are they worht the money? DD just won't be put down and I could just do with something to allow me to eat a meal or have a shower! (she won't behave for DH either, it has to be me Hmm.

If I could put her in a sling and let her BF or stick in a swing and rock her to sleep just long enough to eat, it might save my sanity.

Squid I love the idea of having a bath with DD. She hates bathtime and it might make her feel more secure in there. I like my baths really hot though, do you find you get cold?

Londonmrss · 02/11/2012 16:21

Hi all! Am just catching up on all your news... you all seem like such pros.

We've had quite a difficult week. Baby was admitted to hospital with quite bad jaundice on Monday so we were put on a strict feeding routine and she spent a night in an incubator. Fortunately I have loads of milk so we only had to top up with some formula for one day. We were finally discharged yesterday, but she still looks really yellow.
She still won't latch which is probably because of having to bottle feed for a few days so she's all lazy. This combined with the fact that she isn't really asking for food means we just have to stick to the schedule.
Am still hoping we'll get there with the breast-feeding. I'll keep trying. In the meantime, I'm expressing about 150-200ml every 3 hours so am filling the freezer. Am still offering her the breast, but it's important to keep a jaundice baby well fed so they can flush it out, so we have to get the breast milk into her using the bottle. If she never latches, we'll have to rethink because the routine of pumpingf and feeding leaves no time to sleep. It's really upsetting.
How do I deal with my boobs? They are rock hard and hot and uncomfortable. I feel like I could express litres to make them more comfortable, but then my body would get the message that that's how much it needs to make. Will they just naturally feel better soon?
I really hope she learns to feed. It's so inconvenient having to express and sterilise so many storage things. Still, at least she's getting the good stuff, right? Am still trying to tell myself I'm not a failure. Think my baby is just a bit stupid when it comes to nipples.
Kyyria, I saw on FB that yours had jaundice too- how are you getting on? Fjord, what's your feeding situation?
I am also in the 'baby won't sleep at night unless held' club, although she's fine during the day. Am starting to think the whole Gina Ford routine idea isn't such a bad one after all.
Overall am feeling exhausted and overwhelmed.

squidkid · 02/11/2012 16:27

sorry will write more in a bit, baby having epic 3 hour feed .. have just watched episode of one born every minute... avoided this completely during pregnancy... have to say bears absolutely no resemblence to my experience of labour whatsoever!!

smileyhappymummy · 02/11/2012 16:40

londonmrs you are so not s failure - you're doing an amazing job to manage all that expressing and you're doing brilliantly for your baby in really tough circumstances. Don't forget jaundice makes them sleepy so maybe feeding will get easier as it improves. Can recommend cabbage leaves, warm baths and ibuprofen for boobs. And plenty of skin to skin snuggles with baby!
Sendin you big hugs.
wantanorange we have a swing, worked better for dd1 than this one but still sometimes buys enough time to have a cuppa in peace. Dd1 would nap for hours in it. Maybe try looking on ebwy / gumtree for a second hand one? We bath baby at 36 to 37 degrees, feels warm but not hot (which is how I like my bs) and if I'm sharing with her I get dh to get her out and then top up with lovely hot water.
Go huffle and baby huffle - awesome weight gain.
And livvy big congratulations. Well done you.

Angelico · 02/11/2012 16:44

Livvy congrats on the yoga course!!! :) That was an amazing achievement when you were so pregnant :o On the white noise thing - you have to make sure it's loud at the start, especially if they're screaming. It's also good if they can suck on dummy at same time and we find jiggling carrycot a little bit helps too. On the dummy front - if the tiny newborn ones don't work try a bigger one - our bean still hates the newborn ones we got but sucks on the big Nuk one like Maggie from the Simpsons :)

Huffle respect on your milk production factory :o We haven't had the bean weighed for weeks, will be interesting to know what she is (HV calling next Tues). My back is telling me her current weight is 'a bloody tonne' Hmm

Wantan you're like me on the bath front - loving the idea, hating the thought of being cold! We have a Fisher Price chair that rocks with your foot or vibrates, it was about £40 on Amazon. Great for getting through dinner.

squidkid · 02/11/2012 16:49

londonmrs so not a failure, you are doing everything right, poor little baby, poor you and your boobs... so sorry you are finding it tough after your tough tough labour too
you're doing amazingly with the xpressing and she is getting all that brilliant milk
there are more experienced breastfeeding pros on here so hopefully they will have good advice
i found ibuprofen, cabbage leaves, hot bath and massage boobs (ou can expreess a little without upping supply into the water)
good luck xxx

Angelico · 02/11/2012 16:50

Sorry started post before bean woke x posted London you are amazing for trying to keep up bfing no advice but sending a hug.

Typing one handed with shrieking bean on knee...

Smorgs · 02/11/2012 17:06

Just want to send a big hug to londonmrs it sounds like you're doing an amazing job in difficult circumstances. And congrats to londonlivvy on the yoga course and huffle on epic milk production! Xx

Olivess · 02/11/2012 17:57

london I just think you are doing so well hang in there and just think that it will get easier - sorry I have no boob advice as am a total amateur and not got a clue what I'm doing myself, just bumbling along really!

squid I can't resist telling my birth story. In fact I seem to tell everyone I meet about the birth, but I think it would be good to write it down as well in order to process it. So here goes:

I was due on Tuesday 16th and went for my MW appointment that pm to be given a sweep. The MW was lovely and a little reluctant to do it because she said it didn't often work for 1st timers but being curious as to the state of my cervix I got it done anyway and lo and behold I was 2cm dilated and even more interesting was that my cervix was apparently very stretchy!! That evening I started having contractions but only about an hour apart. This carried on all night and into the next day. It was nothing major just like bad period pain really. DH worked from home and we had a walk, I finished making some curtains for our new house. By 5pm they we getting closer together - every 10/15 mins or so and I strapped on the tens machine. We then watched tv and the contractions carried on but they were still not too painful - I even managed to bake a cake (badly though cos half of it was burnt and half wasn't cooked at all! I guess I was distracted). The contractions carried on all night - in fact we watched a really good grand designs about the couple that renovated the water tower in London. DH slept and I got in the bath for 3 hours, got very wrinkly and the contractions got stronger and stronger. Still not terrible just increasing in intensity. Finally at 5 am we went to hospital - told a white lie to the hospital about the timings of my contractions but at this point didn't want to be at home anymore. It's strange how I wanted to be in hospital, I know that home birth works so well for a lot of people but I felt a lot of relief just going to hospital!

Anyway in hospital they examined me and I was 4cm, I remember being disappointed that I wasn't more after all that time and hard work but it was enough to be admitted. And once again the MW was surprised by my stretchy cervix, apparently I could have been stretched to 6cm if she wanted!

Then a strange thing happened because my contractions just stopped completely. It must be psychological because it took until 2pm for them to pick up again. The big mistake I made in this time was to eat the cheese omelette! That came back to haunt me later on!

Then at 2.30pm the MW was all for sending me home but thankfully DH got her to examine me and I was 6cm and once again my very stretchy cervix meant that I could have been stretched to 8cm. the MW then got into action and managed to get the pool room for me - she had to put up a fight with another lady who wanted it as well but thank god my MW won and I was straight in the pool. At this point I had had no pain relief, just a few paracetamol and the tens machine at home. The contractions were now really intense and I got some gas and air but being an idiot I couldn't co-ordinate the gas and air mask and being in the pool it was as if my brain could only deal with one of them. The pain was very intense at this point but I just got myself in a rhythm for each contraction of breathing and groaning and squeezing DH's hand. Although most of the natal hypnobollocks went out of the window I do think in my own way I used aspects of it- I kind of got myself in a bit of a trance for each contraction and breathed and groaned my way through it.

The pain was in my back and it did feel like my lower back was going to snap in half. I also really felt like pushing at this point although it must have been way too early. after 4 hours in the pool, I had to get out to go to the toilet and be examined. I couldn't go to the toilet so had to have a catheter and was fully dilated when examined so it was all go at this point. I was now out of the pool and kneeling and leaning over a birthing ball with DH on the other side. I now got into the gas and air in a big way - I love that stuff! I pushed for 2 hours using the gas and air and pushing so hard with each contraction. It was such hard work but also amazing as you could feel the head moving down and getting closer and closer. I just found the pushing bit so empowering. It was so hard and I had a bruised nose from pushing into the gas and air mask so hard but for me it was a really positive experience. The feeling of birthing my baby was just out of this world and I just felt so connected with my body and the baby and DH, who was amazing throughout. He even watched her being born and took photos as well.

Sorry that was a really long post and probably not particularly interesting or dramatic . I was really lucky to have a straightforward birth and the baby was in a good position plus my stretchy cervix came in use. Still I was shell-shocked afterwards and the whole experience took a long time to process. However, I feel totally positive about it, I didn't find the pain unmanageable and although it was very painful and the hardest thing I have ever done physically and mentally I also found it totally empowering especially pushing her out!

I am just in awe of those of you who had complications, I have found it hard enough to process what I went through and I can't imagine how it must feel when things didn't go to plan.

Anyway apologies again for the long story, couldn't resist and I am fascinated to hear other stories as well.

Hope everyone has a lovely calm evening....wishful thinking I know but as calm and peaceful as they can be at least. My Velcro baby is sleeping on me which is lovely because she is so cuddly but feeling a little guilty I haven't tried her in her Moses basket to get her used to it! Oh well they're only this little once and I do love this cuddle time.

smileyhappymummy · 02/11/2012 18:03

olivess thank you for sharing your story, you did amazingly! 2 hours of pushing is hard work. Lol at the cake baking whilst distracted too!

Kyyria · 02/11/2012 18:27

Just catching up and as always it's such a relief to come on here and find that I'm not alone!!

Baby is 1 week today and the last week has consisted of the following:

  1. sleeping during the day for 4 hrs at a time, waking up for feeds 3-4 hourly, then nighttimes being on a cycle of sleep for 45mins, feeding for 20-30mins, put down in Moses basket, wait 5mins and wait for crying to start, pick up, feed again...repeat ad infinitum. Occasionally he will settle for 45mins-1hour but then it will start again! Only averaging about an hour and half sleep for me each night. Am beside myself and on verge of tears. Like some of you I am starting to dread evenings and am getting a horrible panicky feeling when it starts to get dark! My poor nipples - they are agony! Tempted to try a dummy as I know he can't be that hungry! In terms of his jaundice it does seem to be settling now but am having to do top-up "cup feeds" when he appears to have sucked me dry. Trying to express breast milk to do these with rather than formula.

  2. Alright once little one is latched, but tends to take 4-5 goes to latch properly, and sometimes will latch, suckle for 40secs then spit it out again...but will immediately complain that he's hungry! How do you know when they have "finished" one boon and need the other? My LO will quite often pull away to suggest he's finished but then start chewing his hands/smacking his lips so you know you've got to feed again.

At this point expecting nipples to fall off in the next week! Also struggling to feed without a cushion for arm support - can't see how i'm going to manage feeding in public without a cushion!

londonlivvy · 02/11/2012 18:51

LondonMrsS I think you're an absolute CHAMP to be expressing AND feeding. Crikey I find there's little enough time in the day just for the feeding.

Kyyria you have perfectly described what's going on in this house. I am already tearful and panicky about how awful tonight will be and it's not even started yet. Certain this is not helpful but not sure how to try to change it. I have read lots of books but it all feels overwhelming. I feel utterly bereft at the mere thought of DF going back to work in 10 days time. Madness. Totally tearful and hysterical about everything. I guess it's baby blues day (day 4) so somewhat inevitable. I had a perky moment early but perkiness has now gone and am full of woe.

olives that sounds like an amazing story. Well done you.

Getting the 5 day test tomorrow and I guess she'll be weighed. Hoping it's a reasonably positive amount though I don't think she's expected to have regained birth weight yet?

smiley you are an absolute boon of positivity. Thank you so much!

Cherry and Smorgs and anyone else a long way from family, I feel your pain. I'd love my sister to be able to come over. BUT I am also enjoying just being us and not having to entertain other people.

Hugs to anyone needing them.

xx

hufflepuffle · 02/11/2012 19:44

Olivess that is a lovely story. Thanks for sharing.

Londinmrss you are doing so well, be proud of yourself.

Londonlivvy please don't despair pet, you are doing so well giving your baby this wonderful start. It will improve, we all promise!

Kyyria hello! Not hardly replied to u at all! U too hav a big boy and as every single MW told me, you will hav to feed him lots!! They were full
If praise for me doing after blood transfusion so may I take this opportunity to praise you loudly as you had even more units than me!!! I hope u are eating well and getting loads of iron to restore you. My little man was jaundiced too and they advised 2-3 hrly feeds to help flush system and keep him hydrated, feeding more in day might help make him sleep longer at night?

Sorry..... Am sure u hav had just as much advice as me. 5 days in hosp for me was great and every single MW was invaluable

Now. Infacol in, first evening feed in progress, fingers crossed

Wishing you all the best eve possible , see u in the wee hours! X

Woolybob · 02/11/2012 20:00

kyyria Nobody but nobody prepares you do they, the only advice I got that helped was if they sleep you sleep (this is easier if someone can take them away and push them round the park or something for a couple of hours). A few hours sleep in the day helped me cope at night. But it really is a day at a time job. I think I cried every day till week 3 just through tiredness and feeling overwhelmed. Had the same problem with not being able to tell if babe 'finished' so have started just putting her back on the same boob - it doesn't seem possible for it to run out of milk. Then if she nods of completely I wind her and if she wakes up offer the other one.

londonlivvy I think they weigh them at 5 days to see how much below birthweight they are, MW told us they were happy as long as less then 12% and then back to birthweight by 2 weeks.

olivess Thanks for sharing, kudos on the cake baking and stretchy cervix Smile. Will post my story at some point when in front of a proper keyboard rather than my phone.

Good luck tonight all xxx

Angelico · 02/11/2012 20:22

Livvy and Kyrria have you tried swaddling? It really did save me the first three-4 weeks. Funnily enough we rarely use it now but it helped so much when she was so tiny and colicky, just took the thrashy, screaminess out of her and comforted her. I used the Harvey Karp way of doing it which covers the arms and a big muslin swaddle. And if your bean is an arm flailer ignore the techniques that leave arms loose - that's what wakes them up, they kind of get out of control of their arms, they thrash about and that upsets the bean more.

londonlivvy · 02/11/2012 23:02

Yep angelico we are swaddling already.
Thanks for the suggestion tho

Thanks woolybob that helps manage my expectations a bit.

And thanks huffle. It seems like such a mountain to climb. Must remember the 'next rock' thing and take one day at a time.

Cherrychopsticks · 03/11/2012 00:02

Oh LondonMrs, that sounds horrible. Glad baby's back home now though. I don't think you should worry at all about bottle feeding. She's still getting all she needs whether it's from the bottle or from the breast, and even better - it's breast milk in the bottle!
As for boobs, I forget how many days you are, but mine did seem to regulate themselves after a couple of days. I was feeling like I couldn't go on, latching was very difficult and painful while they were so swollen, and then they magically calmed down. Not sure how expressing will affect this though...

Forgot to say re. baths - I've had 2 different bathing "classes", both very detailed and specific (the Japanese love doing things by the book and there is only one way to do things), and both said the bath should be 38-40 degrees. Now I questioned this because we have a digital bath and can set the temp and I find 40 degrees too hot, but was assured it was fine.
Have been doing Baby's bath at 40 every morning and he loves it. Doesn't protest going in, doesn't go red, falls asleep. I think it's because they don't stay in long, and in a baby bath the small volume of water cools quickly.
So those of you worrying about cold baths should be fine.
I was told not to have a bath for a month. Ignored that and had a lovely one with tea tree oil and lavender yesterday Grin

Had a good night last night! Was beginning to dread it as it started off with a feeding frenzy at bedtime (around midnight) but then we had 2x nearly 2 hour sleeps and I had to wake him in the morning for breakfast after nearly 3 hours. I feel like a new woman! (apologies to those that do not need to hear this right now, but it shows it gets better! I was barely getting 45mins before)

Kyyria, give up on nights! Just forget about them for now. Sleep in the day. I couldn't at first, but then I nearly collapsed and got tough with myself.
Get me, I'm only on day 9 or something - anyone would think I know what I'm talking about! Grin

londonlivvy · 03/11/2012 04:52

Argh. She slept from 1130 to 230 and I was feeling v encouraged. Fed her 30 mins one side and 10 the other and now she just won't settle back to sleep. Tried dummy for 40 mins and it stopped the howling, though not asleep. Tried additional 20 mins (on the side with 10 mins). She dropped off the boob and doesn't want more, yet won't sleep. Argh.

Tired. Really tired.

Have given cuddles but that didn't help (rather the opposite). Dummy back in but she keeps spitting it out and rousing herself again.

So frustrating.

And now I smell poo. If I change her she will then be totally awake and cross.

I'm not very good at this. Any ideas why she is awake and what to do?