October 2011, the three C's crawling cruising and chatting

[LittlePebble]

Thanks Mama for the title. A new thread hopefully everyone will find us again.

mrsH thanks that makes a lot of sense I've always hidden how much I eat from him as it disgusts me and I fear he would use it as ammunition whenever I bring up his drinking. He still maintains though that his drinking isnt an addiction whereas he accepts that the cannabis is/was so he would now say he managed to stop whereas I havent. Our relationship has always been a power struggle and a lot of that is down to me as I have always seen men walk all over my mum (even now) and I've always said ill never allow a man to do that to me so I immediately get my back up anytime a man challenges me.

We're obviously both a screwed up pair lol

grey i could dissect everything you just posted- you give a reason for your eating- where's his reason for drinking? you should have replied 'oh sorry, i din't realise i sat on my arse all week' etc to his mother- but it would just be like my friend and her husband. he had an excuse for his ways and she had reasons for wanting it different. it boils down to incompatability.

im quite at him drinking that much and being a driving instructor! hoping he's not over the limit and risking not only some innocents life, but the family income.

i read somewhere that depression is anger turned in. it resonates with me. i know where my depression has come from, and it ain't the kids! i hope you come to a solution thats best for you soon. x

I take it all back. My mum has helped dh today as I have been floored literally by d&v. Was s ary this morning as ds1 went to school and dh at work very early. I'm almost passed out and grey on kitchen floor. Finally got hold of dh who came home and my mum drove the 45i min drive as dh had to go back in work to get stuff. Been in bed all day and not wanting to move incase i am sick. Both ends at same time . Going to rest more now, managed to bfeed dd twice without being sick on her.

My HV says 2/3 eggs a week, nothing to do with allergy, apparently its because they're high in cholesterol?

grey sorry things are bad for you again, I don't have any advice in afraid just thinking of you x

Re weight and eating, I eat a lot of crap too and often don't get a proper lunch for me. I've lost pretty much all my baby weight (but my hips really moved in pregnancy so I've got ridiculously wide hips now) The worst bit is my tummy, it still flabby and podgy I really need to start toning it back up.

Re eggs I'm sure I read somewhere that more than 2-3 eggs a week in young boys can affect their spern or something but I might have just dreamed that

X posts mama poor you, how horrible hope you feel better soon x

Ignore my last post just google and think I did dream that up
mama sorry you're feeling so terrible hope your better soon ((hugs))

Thanks strawberry

Re; eating- a wobbly fatty over here too. I hardly fit any of my pre preg clothes.

grey I couldn't add anything to sassys brilliant advice, except to say that aside from psychological/relationship issues, that much alcohol regularly is v. bad for his health, and it doesn't matter how often or long he works, the same amount is hitting his liver. Has he had a liver function test?

I know it sounds blunt, but its a good job you've worked out you can support yourself without him, because if he gets liver cirrhosis or cancer, or any other alcohol related disease, he's not going to be there for you and DCs, which is v.selfish. He has to look after his health as a responsibility to you all.

My DP doesn't drink at all, because of how disgusting he finds people MIL when drunk. I have a bottle of wine split over 2 days once a week, or once a fortnight.

Oh, that reminds me! I was 23 when fell pg with C. Drinking was the cause ;) seriously, the ONE time we didn't use protection.....

grey are you thinking of oily fish and little girls? There's a limit on that, think its either 2 or 4

scheh although that is a another good way to argue against drinking (i didnt think of that) dp has an auntie who is a full on alcoholic. i could tell some stories! she was hospitalised this year cos she drank that much, and her liver function came back normal! we were all

not to make light of it as such...........but,

when we go out with her, she drinks less than us!

i like to think that thats cos shes topping up, whereas we're just getting started, iyswim?

I'd be interested to see him do a liver function test.
When I say I could afford to live without him that is based on him paying £200-£300 per month maintainance for the kids so not really without him if however he died te mortgage would be paid off so wouldn't need the maintainance lol

now feels like such a bitch for making a joke of DH dying

Ah, see a good friend of mine was given 6m to live when we were 19. Fell out of contact, but he's still alive, so I presume he toned it down...

I have a lot of anxiety over everything health, since having C so impact on health is always my first thought

MrsGrey - I have no words of wisdom, my only concern is that he is slowly going against his initial word. No drinking, then some drinking, now not an addiction so it's all ok. Fundamentally you feel uncomfortable about the level of his drinkking so therefore in my view it\s a problem (and not with you).

Sassy - I think you are blind. I have 2.5 stone to lose to get back to my pre Karahan days/ I don't think that is going to happen any time soon!

mama - feel better soon. He needs op because the recent one didn't work

mamma i did post earlier about you but dt's knocked it off before i pressed post. just to say hope you feel better soon.

im feeling increasingly dreadful. i think know i have a chest infection. last time i had one i was 15!
cant get an appointment now, should i go out of hours in a bit- but means traipsing all 4 kids as dp in an hotel tonight or wait till tomorrow morning and phone my docs? tomorrow is better, but im thinking i need anti bios asap to stop risks to dcs and it gets a lot more painful the more it takes hold- although i was only 15, it might not have been as painful as i remember. rambling now!!

bb3 i am very blind! without glasses. ive yet to meet a glasses wearer with as strong as a lense.

sassy is there someone who can mind the kids whilst you pop out?

sassy oooh I bet mine are as strong if not stronger! I get my eye tests for free I'm that blind

H has had a temp and been throwing up the last two days, the poor thing has been miserable. He seems to finally be past it thank god. As such, I haven't kept up with this thread at all so far.

Hope all the ill people feel better soon

scheh yes, next door neighbour who looked after kids when i went docs for eva the other day- except shes the one who has given me the chest infection! grrr

so no.

over im not sure what i am -8 comes to mind with an astigmatism! i pay for the ultra thin lense cos id be wearing jam jars! sorry about h, glad he's improving.

crazy day here. just caught up with the thread quickly mama sassy take care both of you.....

...oh and caught up with the thread over a huge piece of cake....didn't gel with all the weight discussions it's kind of funny; my weight has come back to pre-pregnancy levels but I still have a tummy which looks six months pregnant..not really sure what to do about that.

I've had three bags of 5 donuts this week however I still weigh less than I ever have and still losing a little bit

sassy that resonates with me as well (plus some get well hugs to you as well regardless of whether you take then). I had the HV round today who is going to try and sort out some counselling for me.

ooh big bit of news, I have been discharged from the physio with clear instructions to start running, well walking to start with and take up slowly from there to avoid stressing things too much.

penguin that you recognise it too. but about the discharge from the physio.

ive not gone to the docs. will ring at 8.30 tomorrow.

had a bath, which was slightly ruined by dd1 deciding to have a strop and wake eva up. so my night to myself is also ruined as eva is here with me. im gonna have to make a bottle now i suppose sigh.

anyone want a little witch 11 year old girl?

had to come back from bed but I just had to write this grey i'm new here and you don't know me and i hope you don't think i'm intruding but reading your posts the one thing that struck me was there are so many things happening in your life all at the same time! pregnancy, new baby, cannabis addiction (DPs), stopping that addiction, heavy drinking (DPs), depression.....it would overwhelm anyone....really feeling for you.

Please don't think I am pro-drinking but just speaking from relation terms - there are times when all we can focus on is the negative in a relation. at least that has happened to me at times - i'll tend to see only the negative. unfortunately my mum gets the brunt of it most times :/ those times do end. but getting through them can be tough. and at those times it's very hard to see the positives in the person or the good things they have done or are doing. i write them down. if you think depression is getting to you, believe me, as self-helpish as this sounds, writing the positives and the good things around really helps....

....plus on the drinking, if he's just got over one addiction, he must be struggling as well. can't drinking be gradually reduced one drink at a time or doesn't it work that way....seriously ignorant

grey sorry to hear you're having a shit time, lots of great advice on here for you, hope it can help.

As for the weight thing...well I had a 3 hour walk earlier but then ate a dirty KFC I also still look hugely pregnant. Have started doing the 30 day shred, done 2 days so far, missed today after H had us up at 1am puking on everything, poor baby.

sassy I win! No one ever beats me at short sightedness in glasses, my left eye is -10 and right eye is -9.5. I've stayed at that prescription for a couple of years now thankfully, not sure they make lenses much beyond that!

Ooh I thought C was older than that sassy she looks teenager in photos! How is the venlafaxine going?

Fx your HV finds something cp

lovin makes a really good point :)

Apparently my mh team used me as a case example at a conference recently! Doc is going to send me the slides