Feb 2010 - turning two and turning heads

[BigBadBear]

Ah yes, sounds like a classic night terror BG - I think there's something about it in the toddler book you lent me. I'm glad she resettled easily.

Survival what a lovely day! You definitely deserved it after all the illness and stuff you've been having to deal with lately.

Mous your DD2 is wonderfully bonkers!!! I'm hugely enjoying your descriptions of her mayhem

Another bookworm here. In fact, DD has been a bit droopy today - didn't really want to do much else except read books and be cuddled or carried about. I think she's a bit under the weather - fighting off a cold, possibly - as she slept for nearly 2 and a half hours at lunchtime then went off to sleep fairly quickly at bedtime too. And we had an uncharacteristic poo in the bath tonight, which she hasn't done in a long while. And a rather disgusting nappy yesterday, which also makes me suspect she's not a hundred per cent well at the moment. Or it could be a few teething symptoms, I suppose.

IC it may be teething. DS nappies are always interesting when teething.

DS is also subject to night terrors / nightmares. It started this week ( happened on 3 nights since Monday. I wonder if it's linked with having changed room at nursery and therefore doing new things / been with new people. He may also miss his 2 girlfriends as he often call their names in the middle of the night. He settles back by himself rapidly (5 to 10 mn) but I stay awake long after expecting him to scrwam again.

DS is a compromised between the tornado and the bookworm stilll full on but can stay still if he watches a cartoon on tv or read a book.

Forgot to say

survival glad to hear that you had a good day. You so deserve a break from the health stuff. When is the wedding you're going to?

Mous She sounds hilarious (but exhausting!).

Survival I love the Cotswolds wildlife park - I went once with a friend and her daughters before I had DS - must be a while ago now as the eldest was a little girl and now she's a 16-y-o emo goth. So cute he thought porcupines were pineapples.

I am worrying a bit about my upcoming caesarian. I'm sure it will all be fine but someone on facebook linked to the Amanda Holden thing in today's Sun (I shouldn't have looked) and you hear of occasional stories where women just don't stop bleeding. Also I know that they cut vertically and horizontally last time so there's bound to be more scar tissue. I worry so much about DS not having me around - I find it really easy to picture worst case scenarios panning out.

Also - and this I hate to admit to because I was so very keen to have another child (and still am) and thought I most likely wouldn't - but I do like things the way they are. He's such a sweet, funny little boy and he's getting more and more interesting as his language picks up and I don't want to be exhausted and not give him the time he deserves. Also people say that you see the older one as a bit of a menace around the newborn and they seem enormous all of a sudden and I can't believe I could resent him.

To end on a happy note - DH made toad in the hole and onion and red wine gravy last night and it was delicious. DS ate loads (and broccoli and carrot as well).

BC I haven't had that with DD, although I struggle more and more with DS everyday as he's going the way of DD with sleep and needs constant interaction/attention when he is awake. However at least DD let you put her down to bed once asleep and you would get the 30 mins out of her.

DD had been in a lovely calm phase but looks to be coming out of that now. Still I knew it wouldn't last forever. The hard part is I can't go and deal with it the way I want e.g. throwing is becoming a thing at the moment (as well as battles at nappy time) as I'm already dealing with a crying baby.

BC you hear the horror stories e.g. bleeding with VB's as well.

BC Just a quick post to reassure you! Planned cs are very very safe these days. It is mainly emergency cs that can lead to complications, and usually there is already a complication present that leads to the cs in the first place! I am sure you will be fine and are in the best hands. My dsis has had three cs and recovery after the 2nd and 3rd was much much quicker than first time round.
As for life with two, it is quite normal for you to worry and like things the way they are, but if you could have seen the laughter and giggles we've had so far this morning you'd be . Having one is fantastic, having two is twice as much fun!!

BC I had a bleed after my emCS (that was after almost 2 days of labour and a distressed child who had to be removed this instant). ElCS and planned CS (when you start labour but they do the CS as planned IYSWIM) are wonderfully relaxed and the safest way for the baby to be born. My ElCS was really calm (but I wouldn't want to try another though) and nothing like the horror of the first happened. They take their time to take baby out, and work around the scaring.

I was also terrified to not be able to love DD2 as much as DD1, and even not to be able to like her. I think it is normal feelings.

Suto at pineapple. Sounds like a lovely day.

IC I hope she is better. I completely forgot that we are supposed to be teething again. Just checked DD2 and she already has her 20 so I guess that is it.

The "new" beds were a success . The 6 am woke might have been a fluke though.

I think DD2 mischiefs are my fault, I do still believe when I let DH in the same room as her, he will keep an eye on her . She is hilarious which is bad it is very difficult to tell her off with a straight face.

DD2 is doing very well on the potty and the toilet but she took me a bit by surprise. I have still no underpants or sit reducer. Actually do I need one she is in 4 yo clothes? Do 4 yo still use a sit reducer? I had one with DD1 but don't remember if it was useful or not .

mous I'd try your dd2 without. My dd1 never used a seat reducer because it hurt her legs and she was tall enough to pop on and off and not fall in. I do use one with dd2 now but only because she is tiny and would fall in

Oh, and brilliant on the sleep news, and yes yes to expecting my dh to keep an eye on the children if he's alone in the room with them

Bc my caesarian was an emergency one, but it was extremely non-traumatic and I recovered very quickly. I'm sure you'll be fine
And on the subject of having a second child and your relationship with your first, this poem always makes me cry:

As I hold your 2-year-old hand, basking in the glow of our magical
relationship, I suddenly feel a kick from within, as if to remind me that
our time alone is limited.
And I wonder: How could I ever love another child as I love you?

Then she is born, and I watch you.
I watch the pain you feel at having to share me,
as you've never shared me before.
I hear you telling me in your own way,
"Please love only me."
And I hear myself telling you in mine,
"I can't," knowing, in fact, that I never can again.
You cry. I cry with you.
I almost see our new baby as an intruder
on the precious relationship we once shared.
A relationship we can never quite have again.
But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached to that new being, and
feeling almost guilty.
I'm afraid to let you see me enjoying her.
-- as though I am betraying you.
But then I notice your resentment change,
first to curiosity, then to protectiveness,
finally to genuine affection.
More days pass, and we are settling into a new
routine.

The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast.
But something else is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just we
two.
There are new times -- only now, we are three.
I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other, touch
each other.
I watch how she adores you -- as I have for so long.
I see how excited you are by each of her new accomplishments.
And I begin to realize that I haven't taken something from you, I've given
something to you.
I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of
you.
I find that my love for each of you is as different as you are, but equally
strong.

And my question is finally answered,
to my amazement..
Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you-- only differently.
And although I realize that you may have to share my time, I now know you'll
never share my love.
There's enough of that for both of you
-- you each have your own supply.
I love you -- both and I thank you both for blessing my life.

God, I can't read it without welling up...!!

Mous great news on the lie-in!

We had a nocto-poo incident with DD last night - a horrendous nappy with two mystery inedible discs inside - we've no idea what they are or where she found them, but she evidently decided they were good to eat. Wish she's be that adventurous with her food...!!!
Anyway, she's less clingy and more energetic today, maybe the discomfort of having those things working their way through her lower bowel was what was making her listless and unwilling to walk far yesterday....

Think I've found a brilliantly handy local babysitter. She's fourteen, but seems very sorted and her mum is lovely. Plus, she only lives a few doors up the road, so even if she had a problem when left with DD, she can easily call in help and there's no driving her home afterward. Am now scouring the local What's Ons - it's time DH and I had a night out...

back from the park. DD did a very good job of climbing/walking around the bottom of those big web things.

Thanks everyone :) IC I seem to have something in my eye...

bc my cs was an emergency one, and it went fine and I recovered quickly from it. if/when I have a 2nd child, I would go the elCS way as I would have to be induced at 38 weeks again and can't face the 35 hours labour / not moving / attached to a monitor. I'm sure it'll be fine but if you're a worrier (like I am) you need something to worry about. Can hypnobirth, help you relax?

mous great news on the sleeping. We have a seat reducer for the loo and DS doesn't like it but I think it depends on the child (and he's on the small side anyway).

IC aouch on the poo but at least she's better today.

DD's haircut if anyone's interested...!

that's lovely IC

I'm not ready for DD to have a haircut yet.

Oh she looks so grown up IC. DS needs a proper haircut asap

IC Awww lovely (both the haircut and the poem). Dd2 has also had a trim to tame her hair but it is still shoulder length. Looking at your dd I wonder if I should have been braver! Dd2 noticed little of her haircut because the screen in front of her showed back to back peppa pig! So she was a very happy girl even without fab cars and biscuits

Most impressed by those little ones already potty training. It's fair to say dd2 has no idea. She just stood in the bathroom waiting for her bath and complained about the puddle on the tiles then watched in fascination how she piddled down her legs onto the bath mat. She had no idea how that happened!

IC that is a cute haircut! Not brave enough to face it for DD2
Like bc I have some dust in my eyes

DD1 is very sensitive right now I don't know why! Gaaahhh! She wants to over-ride her sister?

BG your DD2 sounds a bit like DD1 (future police women, CSI or teacher).
Plan C or D, is going back to between you and IC and MIL, which would be a bonus .
Not sure there is a job around for DH. As this is the company which let him down and has "fired" 700 people since .

BG I firmly believed that there is a size as well as age and mental development in the whole control of the bladder. Most of DD1 friends which were as advanced as here but much smaller didn't get it as soon. I can do a whole new phD about this, too complicated to explain fully after a .
Each in their own time!

as her

Thanks for the nice comments about DD's haircut!

Interesting theory about size=bladder control Mous. DD is tiny and clearly has no idea about bladder control (or indeed bowel control, given last night's incident in the bath). I don't think there's any point in my hurrying to potty train her for a while yet (although it would be nice to have her out of nappies by the time DC2 arrives....).

mous you may have a point about dd2's career aspirations (CSI?). Her favourite book she keeps pulling out of the bookcase downstairs is my Textbook of Biochemistry .
She also reminded me earlier that I may be a little too relaxed second time round when she opened the front door because I had forgotten to put the bolt on at the top . Luckily she was so pleased with herself that she came to tell me how clever she was to open the door, rather than head off down the road towards the park...

OK so she has calmed down today! She only washed the floor with the fresh pee of her potty, then procede to lick the result .
She also tried to paint the walls with an actimel and a pair of plastic scissors, I think I got it all of, will see in a few weeks if I missed a spot when something decides to grow.

I bought her some underwear at H&M, the only ones in her sized where some barbapapa briefs in very bright colours. I hope she will not want to pee on them as she can read the story with her sister.