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CRESH - Platters of wafer thin ham, with advice to match

83 replies

Cosmosis · 08/12/2011 14:06

roll up, roll up, check in and get your crap advice here.......

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
AlpinePony · 08/12/2011 14:26

Is the advice as naice as the ham ? Or is it Tesco value advice?

Cosmosis · 08/12/2011 17:18

it's that advice with the bear shape in it.

OP posts:
AlpinePony · 08/12/2011 20:15

Bear kept refusing naice ham so I bought him some bear face stuff. He looked past me and signed "childline". Even the dogs weren't keen. :(

okiecokie · 08/12/2011 20:15

Ooo hello. Shall we see if this fred will last till Summer 2012?

islegrin · 08/12/2011 23:19

May I have some crap pineapple with my crap ham and crap advice? I'm such a cheater, as I have no baybee yet but I did want to mark my place.

Aloha all - BESHie HawaiianCuntShine here, skipping right over the whole PESH-bit and getting right to the screaming, crying and diapering, through a local (Hawaii, if you didn't get that part yet) adoption.

Baby's due any day now (likely the 13th), and I could really use a couple of toe-stomps and fists to the gut to get me in the right spirits. Mind if I join you? I brought GIN!!! Xmas Grin

Cosmosis good to see you still cracking the whip!

AlpinePony · 09/12/2011 05:51

Omg!

Best.news.ever!

You do realise that we're going to acquire a birth/acquisition story and you tell us what you've been doing for the last 2 years!

Do you know which flavour island baybee you have?

How exciting, strictly you're still PeSH but that Fred is all messed up right now, so put your feet up and pass the gin!

CurlyCasper · 09/12/2011 09:04

Cuntshine! well, that got me back over here. Bloody delighted at the prospect of a your new baybeeeeee arriving shortly before Santa! How the devil are you anyway??

Ocarina · 09/12/2011 09:16

Shinyone! How exciting! We need many details!

Muser · 09/12/2011 09:22

Oh my word! ShinyFanjo it is lovely to see you and bloody amazing news on the imminent baybee. Woot woot woot!

PerfectDromedary · 09/12/2011 09:24

hawaii50! You sly dog! Tell us everything!

That has properly made my day, that has.

ginhag · 09/12/2011 10:17
AlpinePony · 09/12/2011 10:23

Youse sayin' we're ugly like?

ginhag · 09/12/2011 10:44

No but I have tragic tits that look weird when I put my arms above my head. And I want to wave my hands in the air like just don't care :)

ginhag · 09/12/2011 10:45

I also have spots. WHY DO I HAVE SPOTS????

Cosmosis · 09/12/2011 10:57

Now, that, Hawii-50 is the best bloody news I have heard in a very very long time. Grin how fucking exciting is that???????????

Tell all??? Spill woman, spill!!!

I am doing a nekkid dance for you right here in the middle of the office I'm that made up!!!

OP posts:
okiecokie · 09/12/2011 13:47

O wow, that is amazing news. And you live in Hawaii!

Medee · 09/12/2011 17:32

oh my, Hawaii, how exciting! So happy for you!

truffs - great birth story.

Truffkin · 09/12/2011 18:35

Fabulous news Hawaii although I don't believe our paths crossed in Le Palais. Am very excited to hear more about it and see pics of your new arrival Grin

My baybee's poos smell like McDonalds hamburger buns (you know that sweetish smell). That's just weird isn't it?

islegrin · 09/12/2011 18:50

I, I, I think I have gin in my eye, let me just wipe that up and put that in a shot glass for later. Fishslaps to you all, my loves!

Well, in March 2010 not long after my last test tube trial, petri dish, fanjo squirt (ahhh it's so good to be back!) I fell quite ill to necrotizing pancreatitis. They put me into a coma for 3 weeks and in hospital for 5 weeks. I also had a common complication which put me at home for about 8 months. Soooo - that was pretty much one of the two years.

At one point they only gave me a 20% chance to make it, because I was in multi-system organ failure. When I woke up I was just glad to be alive, and glad I wasn't diffed at the time.

Frankly I was also glad to give the fertility riddle a break, during my recovery. To me it was as frustrating as a rubik's cube. So it was good to take a breath from it. After I recovered I went back to my fertility doc once, but soon after she moved and I just didn't have the same passion for the updiff that I once did. So we started looking into adoption.

We went to see a local agency, who suggested that we "dual track" with another mainland agency because the local one only does 2-3 local adoptions each year. (the mainland one they recommended does about 300-350/yr) So we did, started the loads of paperwork, (what is your favorite fish, what fish will you give the child, what fish education will you give the child, how much fish money do you make... etc.) We were taking classes when an opportunity came up. They asked us to submit a letter (dear b-parents) and 2 pages of photos, so we hurried and got it all done in one evening! A week later they pulled us aside in class and told us that it was good news we were selected or "matched" as they say, but all is not final until after the birth when papers are signed. This couple was looking for a caucasian couple from another island, so we fit the bill (oh and we're totally wonderful in other ways too, of course).

Both hubs and I have adopted siblings, so that helped. And we have similar backgrounds to the b-parents, so they felt comfortable with us. They are expecting a little boy very soon, and after the paperwork is signed we'll be called to go over and pick him up!!!! If he's not shown his face by Tuesday, they will induce... so the latest is probably Wednesday!!!

My disclaimer is that they could still decide to parent, this is not a forced adoption, it is voluntary - which I understand basically doesn't exist in the UK. But for a variety of reasons they are not in the place they want to be when they plan to have a family. So we are providing an option for them. It's a mixed bag of guts and chocolate, it is... because I know they will suffer a great loss in this, but we plan for an open adoption so they can see him once or twice a year and know that he's happy and doing well.

I'm looking forward to getting the call, and bursting out of my skn!!! It's been nearly 7 years since we started this climb, I'll be so glad to get onto the next mountain!

Truffkin · 09/12/2011 19:56

What a lovely story, to follow an horrific year for you. I can't imagine what you've been through but am so excited that this is how it ends up.

Can someone put the vac round please? It appears to have got dusty rather quickly in here

ginhag · 09/12/2011 21:44

I'M NOT CRYING OK????

actually I am a bit. c'mere shiny and have a gin-soaked smooch. Am so excited for you. So excited in fact, I am going to do KISSES! Like this ----> xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Grin

IveBeenExpectingYou · 09/12/2011 21:56

Hi Shiner, it's CockDodger here (namechanged as I've grown up slightly in the last couple of years, at least I'm pretending I have).

I just thought I'd come out of lurking to say HUGE congratulations to ya!!!! You've had a bit of a rough ride, haven't you? Glad it's all coming together for you now.

Like I said, I've grown up now.

Medee · 09/12/2011 22:06

Oh Shiny, while I understand it is difficult for the B-parents I am keeping everything crossed your son or daughter is with you soon. x

Hello Cockdodger!

Medee · 09/12/2011 22:06

d'oh, just read again and saw you said boy!

AlpinePony · 10/12/2011 05:41

islecunt I'm so delighted for you - another ESH boy! We don't 'alf breed the boys around here. We are going to require the full birf story and photos asap in t'other place (on fb, you have been invited). It's our lair - because we're bits of animals. I am so glad you're healthy and that you're getting your baybee. The voluntary adoption route sounds very positive and sensible, obviously this couple have been able to assess their circumstances and because they've been able to meet/choose you it takes away uncertainties. Any day now eh? Grin Over on PESH we're updating the "not list" - so if you'd like to put your little boy's due/birth date - please update asap!

cockdodger Have you got your baybee yet or are you still PESH? And if yes, why the fucking cocking (I know you like cock really) fuck aren't your stats there?