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April 2011 - Hello Grindstone. Nose here, reporting for duty.

992 replies

DairyBeetle · 29/10/2011 09:43

Plumps comfy pillows, shakes warm fluffy blankets, passes them round, sleeps

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
caramellokoalalover · 29/10/2011 10:30

Thanks for starting the new thread Beetle!

OMG,

^This
I find the frustration of looking after two grinds me down. I never seem to stop all day, yet I never seem to achieve anything either. Of course there is something to show for it (hopefully two happy, well fed and cared for children), but it's not tangible and you get no thanks or praise. Hell yes.

DS1 is a lovely boy, and we are being too hard on him atm. His verbal communication is really good, and DH and I have been talking this evening about how we attribute older emotional understanding to him than he actually has, because he is so articulate.
I'm crying now typing this, because I feel like I'm letting him down but I'm at my wits end to know how to make things better. Sad ^

I could have written this too. And I'm not also dealing with bereavement. I don't know how you're doing it ITMIMI. Big group hugs and rocking with those with 2 kids too, Gsy, Ali, ILTMIMI. And those having tough times at home, at work and with 1 baby. It's hell at times.

ILTMIMI I like your idea for a Katy & Chris show. Would be better than Justin's House I think. They could cook and play dress ups. Wonder if Poi has had her baby yet?

Re the naps in cots with 2 kids, I did find it made things massively easier when I managed to get S to sleep in her cot for daytime naps. I get a chance to go on mn spend time with DS1 and S sleeps better. I do often have DS1 at the door when I'm trying to get her off to sleep whispering in a very loud voice 'Mummy, what you doing?'. He's also decided this week he is ready to use the potty so we have added fun and games. Thank god DH is off work this week.

BuckminsterFullerene · 29/10/2011 10:30

... I wish

Cyclebump · 29/10/2011 10:31

Puts kettle on, rummages for wine glasses and breaks out the chocolate, cheese and various other comforting nibbles

BuckminsterFullerene · 29/10/2011 10:34

has anyone got poptarts?

Alibabaandthe80nappies · 29/10/2011 11:08

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

3 wake ups from T. DS1 in with us twice, which I was expecting because of the shouty day. Strangely I feel quite rested, I'm sure it will catch up with me later! Grin

Today is going better. Sun is shining and we are off into town later for lunch out and then haircut for DS1. I am going to try a new recipe for dinner spurred on by having got DS1 to eat two new foods yesterday - roast beef sarnie and then salmon for dinner.

I can do this, I can do this.

Alibabaandthe80nappies · 29/10/2011 11:09

I haven't Buck Grin Do they still come out of the toaster hot enough to have you heading for the burns unit if any filling gets on your fingers?

BuckminsterFullerene · 29/10/2011 11:20

mmm, poptart lava Grin

chillikat · 29/10/2011 11:22

I spoke too soon about sleep improving. I was all hopeful after she went past the 45 minute stage last night then I peeped in on her (when I went to bed after falling asleep on the sofa) and she moved, then cried about 2 minutes after I got into bed. After that it was every 2 hours or less, I lost count. I fed, we changed, we gave capol, bonjela, put a soft blanket under her and eventually gave up about 7.45. I've no idea how little sleep anyone got :( I'm knackered and snappy at DH and feel bad about it, but he's very understanding and does his fair share of getting up and trying to resettle.

A major hats off to all of you with more than one.

I like hugs to you and your DH.

I'll join you all on the sofa with Brew, biscuits and my blanket, and later Wine

JKSLtd · 29/10/2011 14:53

grabs a pillow and settles in<

Last night was ok here, DH was away, hmm maybe that was it...[hhmm]

Took DD to the cinema with DS1 & some friends - she was sooo excited to see the big screen it was funny. She got tired & grumpy later and eventually slept on my lap so it worked out ok.
An old lady in the lift later on said i was brave for coming to town with 2 (we'd nipped into Wilkinsons for a few bits) - i didn't feel brave, but that's cos i didn't have DS2 with us, he is the really tricky one.

Naps in cot definitely have helped here with the other 2 rushing around. Though DS2 often comes up with me chatting away; upstairs, let's go upstairs, where is bed, upstairs....etc. Luckily DD doesn't seem to mind :)

Also, if you get a sec, ha! try reading the book; what Mothers do, esp when it looks like nothing. I do get frustrated if i feel like i've 'done nothing' all day but really we need to give ourselves a break, we have mothered all day and that is both immeasurable & invaluable :)

GlaikitFizzogOnaNeepyLantern · 29/10/2011 15:59

Pssst Buck I have poptarts choc mallow ones. they may be slightly out of date 2009 but I'm sure they're fine!!

I'm about to start witchifying myself! Shouldn't be too hard. I feel like the undead maybe I should rethink and go as a zombie!

I carved my first ever pumpkin (it would have been a neep if Asda had had any in) yesterday and even if I do say so myself it looks great! Bs bat costume is already to go too and it matches my purple witch!

fraktious · 29/10/2011 17:25

Have fun Halloweening fizz

Glad some days have been better today. I'm undecided on ours but DH is much more relaxed after 2 days holiday so has more patience with M and consequently I'm less on edge which is good. Just fingers crossed for tonight being better than last night.

JKS huge respect to you doing it with 3!

Confession time. I have never had a poptart!

chillikat · 29/10/2011 18:19

We had a lovely time at the halloween-y 1st birthday party playing with balloons but it meant that M didn't have an afternoon nap. I just got her to sleep... it lasted 10 minutes and she seems wide awake again. I'm now hoping she's going to reverse the good naps=good sleep thing and have a good night [extremely hopeful smiley]

I'm a poptart virgin too. But baked breakfast product filled with sweet fruity goo sounds right up my street.

Best go find out what random thing I got out of the freezer for tea, I couldn't tell when frozen, lets hope it goes with rice Hmm

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 29/10/2011 18:38

I have never had a pop tart either. I feel I may be missing out .....

Tonight is curry, wine and Strictly Come Dancing night, heaven!

The pumpkin has been carved here too, dh resorted to the jigsaw to do it!

It's nice to know I'm not alone in feeling the way I do, it really helps. Of course I wish none of us felt like this, but it's good to hear it's normal.

Funnily enough JKS a friend mentioned that book the other day, I think I will give it a read.

fraktious · 29/10/2011 19:13

ILTMI you will either love it or want to throw it across the room. I restrained myself because the kindle would never have survived.

JKSLtd · 29/10/2011 20:20

Yes it is not well written I wouldn't say but useful bits in there to pick out i think.

Something along the lines of:
when a mum is struggling, she thinks I have to get out, so goes out for a walk pushing the buggy. because she is out she holds it together, no tears, etc.
to another mum she looks 'together' and coping. the 2nd mother goes home all depressed because she feels she isn't coping as well.
We need to learn to let others see when we aren't coping (within reason) and not assume that others are coping just because we see a snapshot of them 'behaving' out in public.

other stuff about partners coming home from work but can't remember it well enough to mangle quote.

kittycatcat · 29/10/2011 22:06

Hugs iltmi and to everyone having a hard time. I too have mostly shouted the last few days despite the fact that s slept thru the night last night. His cough and cold is making him v grumpy.

BuckminsterFullerene · 30/10/2011 02:20

Ffs

On our 5th wakeup already. How can his sleep be getting worse?

Cyclebump · 30/10/2011 05:27

Yaaaaawn, clock changes suuuuuck.

Sounds rough Buck, hope you got some sleep.

Starshaped · 30/10/2011 08:10

Another one who has never had a poptart. Am I missing out?!

Not a brilliant night last night, with lots of mini wake ups. DH was on resettling duty early on, so I managed to grab a few hours unbroken sleep. We have been up since 5ish (new time) though. I think somebody forgot to tell my daughter that we were meant to have an extra hour in bed. I sense it might be a loooong day coming up...

Alibabaandthe80nappies · 30/10/2011 08:22

Been awake since 6am new time here, not too bad.

T went to bed at 8.30, needed a daddy cuddle at 9.30. Feed at midnight when I went to bed, and then only one other wake up and then 7am (6 new time). He's just had half an hour's nap, time for breakfast now.

DairyBeetle · 30/10/2011 09:03

Dare I mention that I don't actually like Pop Tarts [hshock] Though I've only had a strawberry one so maybe I just haven't found the pop tart for me!

Last night and the night before I actually got some sleep! And the clock going back seems to have confused me more than S! S has a horrid cough, complete with phlegm, which means that I'm still up and down a couple of times each night but thankfully for the most part he's self settling through the night again. DH on the other hand is still a martyr to the ear infection. I know he's in pain and feels horrid but he really does not need to wake me up to tell me!

He's gone into work today (he now goes in on a Sunday so that he can look after S on a Friday) which means that I have S all day and most of the house work to do (apparently an ear infection and cold mean that even the dishwasher can't be loaded...), though non of it will be happening till after the F1 [hgrin] .

OP posts:
DairyBeetle · 30/10/2011 09:04

Meh, S has other ideas... I spy poo face...

OP posts:
JoEW · 30/10/2011 09:11

Hello ladies. I read so much more than I write. Sorry that there are so many of us with crappy nights but it is helpful to know that it's not unusual. Before I had a baby I would have expected to have them sleep through from around 4 months and I read books that suggest that's perfectly normal. If I didn't have you lot I would think I was doing the worst job ever. Things have calmed down a little here. We're not getting the hour or so awake and screaming at 3am anymore, thank goodness. Last night we had a couple of wake ups for a resettle at around 9pm then a feed at 2am and woke up at 05.51 new time, which seems fair enough.

Sorry not to name check everyone but I've slightly lost track. Ilike, thinking of you. You are amazing. Also had wine and Strictly last night. Isn't it heaven?! And to think I used to like going out to bars.

It's been a LONG time since I've had a Poptart. They wen't the same way as Pot Noodle. And Kraft cheese slices. I'm too faux-posh now.

JKS, I can still recall a walk (manic stomp) with the buggy in the early weeks, with C screaming, me crying and it was pouring with rain. I hope I gave another mum a boost!

MrsW, hope all's well with you and DH and work.

We've had an offer accepted on a house, so are spending the weekend pretending we live there already. Yesterday we went for a walk in the park and bought some meat at the local butchers, before going for a drink at the pub. That's weird, isn't it? We're going there again today.

JKSLtd · 30/10/2011 11:16

Jo - i would so be doing that too! Hope the purchase works out. I'm sure that stomp gave many a mum boost knowing they weren't alone!!

I've never had a poptart either, not sure i fancy one. DO enjoy a slice of plastic cheese on my burgers in the summer though :)

Watching F1 on record here.
DD woke but resettled about 3am, so not bad at all.

Have a new approach to clocks changing:
don't change them at bedtime or first thing, wait until about 10am.
Then you don't get woken at a silly time (tbh you're never going to get an extra hour in bed with young DC) & when it reaches 11am and you've got nothing done, then 'abracadabra' you've got an extra hour to MN get through your jobs [hgrin]

chillikat · 30/10/2011 11:25

Dairy I had loads of ear infections as a kid (and a couple in the last few years) heat seems to help - can you tie a hotwater bottle to your DH's head? Though the method my mum used to use was to boil an onion and put it in an old sock and hold it against my ear Shock supposedly onions retain heat so it was meant to work in the same way. Or maybe the onion smell would take my mind off the pain Hmm

Better night again last night, but still 4 wake ups ending with a feed each time - she surely can't be that hungry but just in case she's getting fed lots today. Woke up 7am (new time) which wasn't too bad and napping now.

Last time the clocks changed back in March I was in labour and watched it automatically update in the hospital room!

Jo I'd be doing the same on the moving house thing :)