Dec 08 Mums - Snot Beards, Farty Boos and Willy Milk (not how it sounds!) - let the fun continue!

[Beans33]

Here we are x

Hello kids

Have a terrific trip, Rubes. Bet you'll have a smashing time. Look forward to hearing about it!

Vag, we go this Sunday, 20th, back 7 March. Yay for the Sardinia trip, sounds perfect.

Ooh, looking forward to Monday's ep of Episodes now.

Invis, I am sure I know that shop you mentioned for Jam in Camden - Chalk Farm Rd, that one? If so I kitted out my flat in London with stuff from there.

Still at Mum's and so still not posting properly. The girls just love being here. They both seem to have developed even in a week (sounds daft I know). Mum and her DP are so sweet with them and give them masses of attention.

Oh gosh, wonder how Spot is doing?

Goodnight lovely ladies.

Good Luck Rubes!

Yes Avo defo how about Tues or Wed?

Jam: the Snape Maltings place we went to the other weekend was crammed full of that kind of thing. It's just outside Aldeburgh and has a really good toyshop too if you need to bribe the DSs. Prob less variety than a London shop though.

I'm busy next Tues but free Wed if anyone is about :).

Zoe: I'm sorry your friend is battling with HPs already :(. I can't see any reason why she wouldn't be welcome at a toddler group. The only issue I can see is that she might get a bit fed up with answering well-meaning questions.

Rubes: have a great holiday!

Jolly: good to see you here - you're clocking up the days and weeks at the mo:)

Hope the reading sesh goes well Avo.

A quick q re keeping children entertained: what do you all get up to in the afternoons? I'm enjoying having more time at home but I feel it goes a bit downhill after lunch. We're out at toddler group or doing stuff in the mornings, but by lunchtime the boys are tired so I tend to put the telly on for a bit and potter about myself. Then it's really difficult to get things moving again and we get to the end of the day without much having happened and the boys a bit bored and fractious. Maybe I should just ditch the telly [shudder] and have a quiet story time instead? If it's fine I can turf them out in the garden and we can grub about doing a bit of weeding which they enjoy. Anyway, any tips would be most welcome :).

And a big hello to Trace if you're lurking :)

Have a grand trip Rubes

Effie does DS2 still have a nap? I use DDs nap time to get out some cooking stuff or something else so I'm geared up with something to do. Could you use the telly time to get something out? On nice days we go for a walk and collect stones and talk to cats in gardens. I don't know how much fun it would be for your ds1 though, I guess he's outgrown collecting stones.

mom are you out there? I hope all is well?

Zoe: that's a good idea. DS2 will nap sometimes but it depends what we are doing, so I can't guarantee it. I think most of the problem is that I like to have a bit of quiet time myself during the day, but maybe I should think about having that at 4-5ish when they really need a bit of down time rather than after lunch. Just because they will sit happily in front of the telly for an hr doesn't mean it's a good idea for every day.

And DS1 hasn't outgrown collecting stones - we also like zooming about on the bikes in the park at the end of the garden. It's so much easier in good weather!

Effie we have the afternoon down time too. I either take them for a slow walk to the shops to buy something simple, or set out one of their big toys to play with together like the castle or airport. Otherwise I just give in and let them chase each other backwards and forwards on scooters around the living room. I know what you mean it is difficult until the weather gets warmer. DS2 is starting to get into dress ups so that's good, or you could get them to make their tea from one of the I can cook recipes on the cbeebies website. Kill two birds. We also do a lot of playdates with friends of mind who have kids at similar ages.

Oh and boys def don't grow out of collecting stones. I have s handbag full of them.

Hello everyone

My day is broken up with school runs now, but before it was, we had TV after lunch while the littlies napped then

made cakes
park if fine
pound shop for stickers etc (trip then activity when we got home)
making collages out of boden catalogues and magazines (maybe more of a girl activity)
bit of a disco in the dining room
bit of cleaning - for the children of very untidy parents, both girls love a cloth and a bit of organic windowlene on the big glass door, wiping table, hoovering, sweeping

All very lowkey but jolly none the less.

Right, school run no 3 beckons. See you all later. XXX

L will be 7 this summer and she still collects stones (and feathers and shells and leaves and twigs...)
I'm trying to keep up with reading here but not feeling much like posting. No major news or changes here, except that lovely farmhouse has been sold, so that's that plan out of the window.I'm a bit gutted as it was so exciting, but also a bit relieved that there's no rush to make any decisions.
I'm really struggling with L. Haven't the energy to describe it all here (to your great relief) but I just feel like I can't parent her.It's all going wrong and I feel like I've created a monster and it'll only get worse. I keep thinking of posting a thread in a behaviour or parenting topic, but can't handle the potential meanies on the wider MN at the mo.
Next week is half term which might help. Although if I can't manage when I'm off work all day every day then maybe there's no hope.
Anyway sorry for the misery. This is why I'm not posting too much at the mo.
Hope those going away have a wonderful time.
x

Oh Trace, tell us please, if only to make me feel I'm not the only one who manages to break perfectly good children. Do you ever feel like you were given this lovely angel, and slowly but surely your messing the angel up? Sorry about the farmhouse that is gutting, but maybe something as good or better will come up. Have you thought anymore about just renovating where you live now. You mentioned that once before. Did you get the first valuation done.

My day has gone tits up. I had a gym re evaluation today which I was kind of looking foreward to as it does a fitness test as well as weight and body composition so was hoping to see some improvement there as weightloss not great. Also I had planned to drop into the hospital on the way back to get my ankle x-rayed. It all depended on DS2 going down for his nap at 11 because DH is really busy with work. Of course DS2 wouldn't go down at 11, has only just gone down now at 1, so all had to be cancelled. Bum. Oh well, I'm orf out with the girls tonight to a lovely wine bar so will just focus on that instead.

Oh Trace, you sound so low. I hate to think of you feeling like this. I am sure L is not a monster and I can assure you we all struggle with our kids at times. It's normal. I will confess to actually being slightly scared a out how I will cope alone with the girls with no DH or childcare all next week. I want to fill the week with fun and activities and great moments for the girls but I know at times I will lose it and shout and be impatient and feel inadequate. I don't know if it helps you to know that to struggle is normal but it really is. Big hugs to you.

Rubes - good luck for the next few days of travelling. I hope you have a great time.

Jam & Effie - shall we make a plan for next Wednesday then? Can we tempt anyone else???

Reading with DD1's class was interesting. I noticed none of the kids were really playing with each other they just bumble around each other. So maybe I should not worry when DD says nobody plays with her. She seemed happy and absorbed in activities so that was good.

It was v interesting seeing the variation in reading skills in the class. Some kids couldn't even sit still to hold the book and didn't know their letters. Others were v competent at sounding out each word. None could read fluently. I was quite relieved as the MN reading threads had me thinking that a lot of kids are fluent readers in Reception and I was judging DD for not reading fluently. Now I realise that women on the wider MN are either a skewed sample with genius genes or they stretch the truth rather a lot!

Trace: if you don't think we complain on here you aren't reading closely enough . Seriously, parenting is hard work and we all struggle at times - if you can't vent on here, where can you? And 7 must be a tricky age - at school but still a little girl, and is there a hormonal element too? I'm finding DS1 hard work at the moment and I vaguely remember something about a testosterone surge in small boys which would explain A Lot.

Sorry the farmhouse thing isn't going ahead at the moment. But you never know what may come up :).

And Trace if you don't feel up to starting a thread, have a search of some old ones. I searched for 'parenting boys four years' on Google and it came up with an old MN thread full of exasperated parents of 4yo shouting and hitting machines which made me feel an awful lot better.

Trace, I think all of us with older children worry if we are doing it right and worry about times when we haven't lived up to our own high standards. My L is a year younger than you and while delightful at times can be a shrieking harpy. Awful. At times I see myself in her so much, esp I am sorry to say when she is being a pain. We all are trying our best and getting bits right and other bits not. You aren't alone. Honestly. Big love to you.

Arti, I am sure you will have a fab time next week. I know what you mean about filling their time with fab times and making lovely memories. I try that too, and sometimes it works but other times I get a bit cross as something lovely I've spent a lot of effort on goes a bit tits up. Quite often we have great times and make fab memories just pottering around.

BTW, have you had any luck yet with the Brighton stuff?

Right, Barbie and the Diamond Castle is on (which is fab - one of her better ones) and I am going to have a quick rest for an hour while they slob out in front of the TV. Bad mummy!

SOrry, Trace, my L is a year younger than yours, rather than you. She is nearly 6, not 31!

Thank you all for the suggestions of stuff to do - I'm going to try a few different activities and see which ones work out. Re complicated plans, one of our fave things is batting balloons about. Must get some more, and dig out the bubble machine :).

Trace, I was flicking through and found this which seemed a bit like my Lucy at times. I don't know if your Lucy has tantrums but mine does and it is exasperating.

Please do post about what's worrying you if you think it might help to offload. I am a little wary of the wider MN as there are always people ready pounce but everyone here knows each other well and will try to offer support

any use?

Vag: is your ankle still dodgy? If so then I hope you are getting it checked out soon. Have you managed to reschedule the gym?

Oh Trace, the other girls are dead right, you know. Kids can be so challenging (I only have first hand experience of my littles but have secondhand experience of friends') and it doesn't make L a monster, just normal - just as it is normal for you to find it trying! What does your DH think? You can post anything you like on here. We're all on your side, never forget it.

Am getting annoyed not being able to post on a proper computer. Being succinct doesn't suit me!

Trace love, if it'll help you must post on here. Blimey, I vent often enough. And I find I don't even need any answers to feel better, most of the time it's just a relief to get it out of my system. Sorry about the house, but you never know what is just about to come on the market - keep us enertained with house porn! It sounds to me like stroppy sevens is just another phase, like terrible twos or teenage tantrums. Oh what joys I look forward to

Sybs I know just what you mean about the LOs inheriting our worst traits. DD has taken to saying 'hang on' when I ask her something. I must say that so often and hence not give her half the attention she deserves

Great idea for balloon fun Effie, I've put balloons and my shopping list. I have a collection of loo rolls and egg boxes in the kitchen work top that is growing quickly. I have some vague idea they could be fun, but don't have a clue how

LadyT you mentioned a new Nigel Slater book. I love love love love his books. What is it called? I must hunt it down

ZJ, it's called Tender, Volume 1, subtitled A cook and his vegetable patch. It's a big fat hardback, good enough to eat. My DP's going to love it.

Hello everyone,

trace Why not post more about what is bothering you re L on here first before braving the wider MN? We might be able to help or at least sympathise. I'm sure doubting your ability as a parent is all bound up with your current situation, changing meds, going back to the consulant etc. Oh and re the house, something else will come along that will be even better.

rubes Hope you have a great trip! Lots of relaxing vibes for the travelling.

sybil Did you get my email re the PM?

I love the tips of things to do in the afternoon. I'll make some notes.

Feeling a bit miserable this evening as my consultant has decided that he is going to deliver me at 34 weeks, so in 2 weeks time. I know that is much better than things looked a few weeks ago but as my BP had been behaving itself I just thought they'd keep me going for as long as possible. I'm just not sure what to expect. Does that automatically mean special care baby unit? The scan today showed the baby was 2kg, that's still quite small isn't it? There is also talk of repeating the steriod injections. I know they must think it necessary but still .