FEB 2010 Longer out than in and first Christmases around the corner...we're 9 months on.

[InmaculadaConcepcion]

Shiny new thread, as promised fellow FEBers!

Figured we would start another new one to mark first birthdays, bethlou, so I've held fire on referencing that landmark in this thread title - hope that's okay with y'all!

Anyway, welcome everybody, pull up a comfy chair, someone get the wine out and I'll open a huge box of chocolates for us all to share.

Good luck with the sleep training GF - it is frustrating to have to start again from the beginning but we had to too after he had the tummy bug. Lovely pictures.

Abs I'm really glad you got to spend Christmas day together but really sorry about the cancelled flight. What does your DP do? He
seems to be a real jet setter.

PA Gorgeous pictures. What a lovely first Christmas for Esme. She is so cute. You look amazing.

Chinook Glad things are going well.

IC Hope you are home safe. Sounds like you had a great time with your mum.

Not much to report here. DS is being great - I need to get him on more chopped food and less lumpy purees. I often fall back on filling him up with a stage 1 pouch at the end of a meal if I think he hasn't eaten enough and I should really stop that. I think he might be a little bit allergic to egg. He threw up last two times he had it and has had a little bit of eczema.

DH is back working in his room until God knows when at night.

PILs have said they no longer want to stay at my mother's when they visit (she is a bit exhausting) so I sent them details of local guesthouses but no reply. DH and I have agreed that we need to take it in turns to do visiting - we won't go to them every month, only every other months. So on alternate months they can either come here or not see us basically. It is much harder for us to pack up all the baby essentials and for him to take time off work to drive 3 hours each way than them to come here - neither of them work. Ho hum. At least DH and I are in accord.

(we don't have a spare room).

Hello! I'm at my parents in Birmingham. We had a nice Christmas at home with the ILs - I was quite tired afterwards especially as DD2's sleep is a bit erratic again. Very bad separation anxiety here, which is exhausting for me and making me feel guilty that I can't help out with other stuff because she wants to be superglued to me all the time.

Hope everyone is OK.

BC yes I agree it's frustrating especially as last night night was like on the 1st night we ditch the dummy. Hopefully tonight will be better.

Abs Glad that you had a family Christmas but sorry about the holidays.

IC hopefully the trip back home went well.

Hi all. Lovely to hear the stories of all your different Christmases. Watercress you are now only about 40 miles from me!

BC sounds like you might have similar difficulties with the in laws that we have from time to time, although they were very grateful that we made the effort to go down there. I did have the tummy bug overnight on Christmas Eve, but luckily felt better by the time morning came. I managed to infect all of them which was quite amusing as MIL had insisted that we must go even if we were ill! Did mean I had 3 days running with very little sleep for various reasons (icluding a night where the electrics went mad whilst icicles were crashing off the roof onto the glass conservatory roof and DH was sleeping off the bug!!)

Despite that, we've had a lovely Christmas and our boys have had so many wonderful presents. They are playing quite nicely together at the mo, apart from DS1 shutting DS2's head in a door yesterday in frustration!! Luckily he's quite a sturdy little fella.

GF sorry to hear about the sleep training and starting over. At least you know it will work and is worth your efforts. We gave DS2 calpol for several nights running in the week before we went to the hospital (on the advice of the HV). DS2 slept through the nights most of that time which suggests to me that he is in pain and that it wouldn't be fair for us to try and do sleep training at the mo, even though we are tired. How I'm going to manage going back to work next week I have no idea...

Glad to hear that you got to spend the day with DP Abs even if it wasn't quite where you wanted it to be.

PA sounds like a lovely holiday in the end - and lovely for your DD to show off her skills to the adoring fans! The photo was cool (as was someone else's who I can't remember by name - sorry! I have been reading and not managing to post).

I'm going to go and do a job or two before the boys wake from their naps. Hope those of you travelling get home in one piece. Back soon.

bethy poor you. I hope you manage to getsome rest.

DS went down without any fuss so fingerscrossed the night will go smoothly (find a piece of wood and push away the mn sleep jinx)

Night all

Ooh bethy where are you? I'll wave in the right direction!

Hope everyone is OK and looking forward to 2011 - the year our LOs turn one. Hasn't it been an amazing year?

You said it, watercress!

It's capped a string of extraordinary years for me... (well, ordinary in the scheme of things, but they haven't seemed like it!)

I went from living in one place with XDP and doing one job for ten + years to marrying (now) DH, moving countries and careers and becoming a mum. If you'd told me four years ago about my life now, I would have looked at you in disbelief.

Yes, we got back fine, thanks bc and GF - another easy journey, DD was great, thankfully! It was lovely at my mum's, but it's good to get back to our own little flat again - and the comparative warmth of Madrid.

Sorry to hear of disturbed sleep, watercress and bethy. You have my sympathy and I hope you can get a few decent-ish Zs in soon.

Not surprisingly, DD woke a fair few times last night - I imagine she'll settle down in a few days time once she's readjusted to being home. She'd only just started settling down at my mum's, poor love! Still, it wasn't too bad. Although the early morning co-sleeping didn't work as well here as at mum's for various reasons. Think I'll bring DD into my little bed in her room tomorrow morning, rather than traipse her through to the family bed. Maybe that will be less disruptive to all of us. We shall see.

Sounds like you've got a good approach to the PILs situation, bc - it makes a world of difference if you and DH agree on the course of action in that department.

I've just started reading Toddler Taming, which was a Christmas present from my DSis. I'm really enjoying it so far - Christopher Green's got a very engaging writing style and what he has to say is very reassuring as well as being funny. Anyone else read it?
I've also been strategically leaving it in the loo so DH will pick it up - he rumbled me straight away, but it worked and he's been enjoying it too.

Various piccies and a wee clipette are now on the blog, if you fancy a little lookee at DD's and our Xmas antics....

Night wasn't too bad. DS woke up for 30mn at 12.45am but finally resettled by himself. Small victory!!!

DS is very clingy at the moment but it may be linked to a new cold. Tooth 7 is appearing so it may be why. His bum is finally healing but he's starting what seems to be a new rash! Is there ever an end to nappy rash?

Welcome home IC. I agree it good to be in your own house/flat.

DD seems to be ill, you can imagine our night. Plus I have a 12 hour day at work today.

Oh, PA

I hope your DD feels better VERY soon.

PA I hope your day isn't too bad and that your DD will get well quickly.

PA hope she's better very soon. They regularly bounce back far quicker than you recover from the experience of having an ill baby!

Watercress Leamington Spa - a wave along the M40 please!

BG Found myself using the phrase 'baby giraffes' in conversation yesterday in relation to my two huge boys and thought of you!!

IC Toddler Taming is something I might need for DS1 really at the mo! However, the pupils that I work with (who mostly have Down Syndrome) have given me a good grounding in being consistent and firm. So far so good!

A big old house caught fire about half a mile from here yesterday and the fire service were using the hydrant at the end of our road to refill their tanks (all morning). I took DS1 up to the engines to have a look, as he currently thinks he is fireman Sam (it is his name at least!). The fit fireman actually got us on board the engine - not sure who was more excited - DS1 or me!!

Today we took DS1 for his first bike ride on his proper bike with stabilisers. Having spent 4 days cycling in very small circles around the dining table due to snow and slush outside, he was thrilled to be let loose in the park! Definitely a big moment for us.

DS2 took a dislike to the yummy tea I made tonight when I spooned in the first mouthful (having eaten it happily last week) and proceeded to give me the rest of the day's food back in protest, before deamnding an alternative meal . One day he will stop vomiting, my washing machine will get a rest and the sea of vomit will be but a distant memory. At the mo I have one who won't eat enough (DS1 lost 500g last month) and one who doesn't want to drink (squeezed 9oz water/milk into DS2 all day today including hiding it in meals!) Teething I think. Ho hum, 'tis just one day/week/month...

Saw an active thread yesterday about reviewing this year for us personally and hopes for 2011. It made me realise what a tricky year this has been for us and I just want to thank you all for listening to my ongoing gripes and grumbles. My aim for next year is to be as positive as possible whilst continuing to try to sort out my two poorly boys (and keeping my job, as I face the possibility of redundancy by September). What would the rest of you add?

Off to see some friends tomorrow morning for the night so wishing you all a premature Happy New Year. See you in 2011.

Beth that is a lovely post (minus the vomming and possible redundancy). It's def been a year to remember.

DD is a bit letter, I think. It's turned into a clold now instead of just a cough with alternating fever and shakes. She's doing loner periods of being OK, but coughing is effecting sleep. When she sneezes, snot dribbles straight to the floor

Well my machine broke today, much to everyone's dismay as a lot of have a review at the end of Jan and all need samples to measure (which we don't have due to the continual breaking of machine). So I came home and then had a 90 min nap while DH took DD for a pram nap

Next year, apart from the marathon my plan is to just survive (OK maybe a strong word but I can't think of the right one). I should have been brave and asked for the job to start later (but I already had it postponed 2 months) so I could've have a sufficient rest from the PhD, let alone the baby.

One last thing, DD has had a spot in her nappy area but just won't go away. The skin is slightly broken. It's not getting worse but not getting better, any ideas? We've had the bad nappy rash come and go while this has been there.

PA the spot will heal but you need to give it a break friom contact with poo and wee - my suggestion would be a thick layer of Vaseline over it and the surrounding area, plus as much nappy free time as you can (we do about ten minutes morning and evening on an old towel).

BL . Sounds like you have had a hard year, but you have done really well to stay positive (loved your account of your DS1 cycling - we had the same thing earlier this year with my DD1 and now she can cycle literally miles).

IC thank you for keeping us all going this year. Your continued presence on this and all the related threads has been reassuring and much-needed (by me, at least).

To everyone else, this group has been really important to me, so thank you one and all.

As for New Year's resolutions, I've got quite a big year coming up with going back to work, and various other things. Like PA my vow is to survive, hopefully with dignity and grace. Fat chance!

IC Lovely blog and lovely pics/clips of Rosie. Your mum's place looks ace.

Bethy Sorry you were ill over Christmas - I reckon your MIL deserved to catch it! What an attitude to have, honestly. Miserable cow. Going in the fire engine sounds like brillant fun with extra points for hotness of fireman. I am so impressed with the way you have dealt with everything this year.

PA I'm glad you got to have a bit of rest yesterday - it sounded like it was going to be a total ordeal, 12 hours work after so little sleep. Hope DD is feeling a bit better.

to GF and Watercress.

We went to a friend's housewarming yesterday and saw another baby boy that was born a few days before DS. My DH knew the male half of the couple vaguely as he's in a band that DH has written about but we ran into them in the high risk antenatal clinic at King's College Hospital around Jan/early Feb last year and we were actually in having our babies at the same time. I remember a really surreal evening while I was waiting for my caesarian and she'd already had her DS but he was in SCBU and we were all just sitting in their room (she'd managed to get a single room somehow) all really jittery and slightly in shock. We hadn't seen them since the babies were only a couple of months old so it was lovely to catch up. He is just as bald as DS too!

As for next year my main hope is that I can carry on being able to stop for a moment and think before saying something snippy to my DH. I've been loads better recently and the house has been more harmonious. I want to be a nicer person and I don't want DS to grow up in a house full of arguments (we don't have lots but there are better ways to resolve disagreements than shouting) - I want to be an example to him, so he can see that disagreements aren't scary but something you work through. I want to be honest about my feelings and let him know that all his feelings are allowed - not to try and stifle uncomfortable emotions.

I want to cook more from scratch for him. I probably only cook about one meal in four or five at the moment.

I want to see if we can conceive another baby, naturally this time. (Although that period that I thought was starting recently never really materialised. I just had a couple of days of spotting and it went away - and no, it couldn't have been an implantation bleed).

Anyway this is turning into an essay so I'm going to go and do a useful thing - sort through some of his too-small clothes and choose which ones to get rid of and which ones to hang on to.

Thank you all for being here through 2010 and hope we can share all the ups and downs of next year too.

Aw, watercress, what a lovely thing to say...

And a nice idea, bethy!
You've had it especially tough this year, what with all the health issues you've had to contend with. I really admire how you've coped with it. If the resolved positivity slips in 2011, remember this thread allows unlimited venting with no apologies necessary...!

...and you can always ask watercress for some positive reframing!
watercress, your posts certainly come across with dignity and grace, although I've never met you in RL (unfortunately), I bet you've got both in spades...

PA, your 2010 was incredible. May 2011 give you a chance for some much-needed relaxation.

I'm not ignoring everyone else, just commenting on the NY posts thus far...

Well, 2010 has been the most emotionally challenging and rewarding of my life so far. The learning curve of motherhood has been steep and at times daunting, but the gift of loving someone with my whole heart is more precious than words can express.
It's also shown me what a superb choice of DH I made [smug emoticon] - he's shown time and time again this year how committed he is to being a wonderful husband and father. I really couldn't have asked for better.

I hope the end of 2011 will see me either pregnant or holding another baby (which will hopefully be sleeping like an angel...!!) and that our semi-planned return to the UK will work out well. And I hope I'll be able to not only cope with all the above, but enjoy it too.

And finally, a huge THANK YOU to all of you. As an ex-pat living miles away from family and many friends, the support you've all shown and the advice you've given have been invaluable.

Having just re-read the above, I realise it's a good job I'm never likely to win an Oscar

Sorry, X-posted bc...

Wise words regarding your relationship with your DH. Having read a lot of the threads on here about people's marital relations after the birth of a baby, the first year seems to be the one that puts the biggest strain on things, then (all being well), it all settles down again. I'm sure it'll all be okay for you, especially given how determined you are to make sure it is.

Well, the cooking you DO do sounds delicious, if the recipes you share with us are anything to go by!!

Happy New Year, one and all

I agree those threads have been a light in those sleepless nights, rant away gates, heart melting moments, a ear to listen.... (thanks IC and all of you)

Me, i would like 2011 to be successful in stabilising my diabetes in order to start TTC again, resurrecting DH and my sexual life (sorry TMI), and just be happy and enjoy every moment.

Look at us getting all sentimental :)

DD had another rough night, unable to go more than 5 mins without coughing or turning due to being bunged up. Her temp seems better this morning.

BC I was looking at your flicker photos last night and I have to ask how come you looked so amazing at the end of your pregnancy and indeed not long after.

Oh PA big hug. Have you try to raise your DD's mattress at an angle? It helps my DS with his coughing. I just put a rolled towel by his head.

Tonight DH is working and he left me for company a bottle of champagne. It will be rude not to drink it It'll be my first new year eve by myself (actually I'm not by myself as DS is upstairs sleeping ). Last year I drove to the pub at 11pm and was there for the cheering

I decided to revisit ante-natel thread of this week last year. Turned out we were all rather hormonal and fed up but in a nice way where we could rant to one another about other people.

There was a general pressure regarding mat leave and to take it early, luckily Stoof was on hand to reassure Shiregirl (and all of us) that she worked until 38 weeks in her previous pregnancies. As for me, well I was actually in work when I was in early labour and a week overdue.

FlyingReindeer was suffering from the French?s approach to breastfeeding and fighting off pessimism that she would fail, just because she was returning to work early. Similarly being outraged by the price of electric pumps.

That soon led into all of us having a rant other people seemingly having open access opinions on pregnant people and being the designated driver. I particularly liked Watercress one whilst Abs resonated with pjamababes

Stoof has seemingly directed half the thread to spinningbaby , cue lots of people mapping out their babies.

Abs was starving due to her glucose testing, but she did manage to stay up to 1 on NYE/NYD (along with a few others). Whilst the rest of us admitted that we only saw the early hours due to the numerous toilet visits we needed.

A lot of retail therapy was the cure to hormones and the rest of world. This obviously required much research on said activity as well. Abs brought an ?amazing pregnancy support pillow? that let her get a night?s sleep (lucky cow). Mamaloco was handing out purchasing clothes advice in France. Extra lessons on shopping, always greatly valued.

Fizi was pondering walking off some of the excess festive food that was consumed, but managed to blame the weather as a reason not to. This was too much relief was to the rest of us as we didn?t want anyone making us look bad.

GFbrought the tone down and started packing her labour bag (I was still in denial about having to these things). Useful tips from those of us who were already mothers like Bethylou and watercress were soon abound and much appreciated.

GF (again) thought that posting at 7am was early. Oh how she didn?t know that we?d all find 7 am a lie-in in the months to come
Meanwhile I spent New Years in the Lake District and was busily threw myself half-way down a mountain. Cue getting an extra anti-D injection gratis and not being able to sleep as I too bruised to lie on my sides. Mawbroon not to be outdone broke her ankle in 3 places.

Bethylou realized that there was a reason for sending DH to the supermarket instead of going herself and we all hoped he would return to form the following week whilst shouting ?ONLINE SHOPPING GIRL?.

Basically we were all very hormonal and fed up with the world . A lot of BH starting to come out and return of back pain and sickness for some, but also the realization that in a month?s time most of us would be holding new babies.

A few days later, we were all holding up inside because of the weather. Luckily most of our work places were OK with this. A bit after that people were starting to cook up food to freeze. How I wish I had listened to that advice more, then I wouldn?t have to suffer MILs food . At that point, the thread took a more upbeat tone, obviously we were just subjected to too many people over Christmas.

Believe it or not IC didn?t make a appearance until Jan 11, happily exclaiming that while she was due Feb 21st, she thought it was stay put until March .

I have to admit that I was so busy with work and other things that I didn?t really keep track of people and events on the ante-natel thread. Of couse, I?ve made up for it since.

Happy New Year everyone

PA what a nice reminder!

I can't believe that in about 2 weeks time, some of our LO will turn 1!! I think mamaloco and IC are the 1st ones?

Great review, PA!!

I can't believe I left it that late to muscle in join the group, either! Glad I did though.

Actually, as I recall, I found the ante-natal thread on Netmums and was - um - a bit put off by the style of the posts. Just not me.
I tried again and found my true home...

Hah, how wrong was I about when my baby would arrive!!

Posting this while waiting for our friends to arrive for NYE dinner - they're being typically Hispanic (ie, late..!)

DD was uncharacteristically hard to put down at bedtime - I think she sensed there was a party in the offing....

Have a good night, those of you that stay up for midnight! I probably would have retired early if it wasn't for our friends coming. Celebrations around us would probably keep me awake though, so if you can't beat 'em...