FEB 2010 Longer out than in and first Christmases around the corner...we're 9 months on.

[InmaculadaConcepcion]

Shiny new thread, as promised fellow FEBers!

Figured we would start another new one to mark first birthdays, bethlou, so I've held fire on referencing that landmark in this thread title - hope that's okay with y'all!

Anyway, welcome everybody, pull up a comfy chair, someone get the wine out and I'll open a huge box of chocolates for us all to share.

I agree IC one less of the child disease to worry about [fmile] but he was very grumpy today so hopefully he'll sleep well and tomorrow will be back in full health.

Off to do the Christmas cards (with a bit of luck they'll arrive to France and Ireland before Christmas )

DD was a lot better tonight. Not so over tired (nor over fed ) and took 5 oz of milk and went straight to sleep. Phew.

IC If I had offered him a biscuit yesterday, I would have been hoping he'd choke on it!! He is back in good books today. Told me in Sainsbury's he thought my bum looks smaller than before I was pregnant and assembled new kitchen table. Hope you get a good night's sleep.

Big day tomorrow, DP, DD and I are going up to London to meet my boss and discuss my return to work.[throw self to floor wailing emoticon] And show off DD most importantly! I work at a school and we are staying for the Xmas lunch. Hoping DD will enjoy all the fuss and the dinner!!

CC Glad you are relaxing about DD. TBH I am thinking the charts just do more harm than good. You cannot compare FF and BF babies. Just remember all the goodness she is getting from you. Wish I still was BF. I must get over it!! Ignore MIL. I do..!

BF and BG Hope DCs are feeling better. It is so awful when they are ill.

BC How are you feeling?

Stoof Hope you are nice and warm!

Mamaloco Finished your Xmas shopping?
I have not even started mine. Ignoring pile of Xmas cards to write....

just a quick mark? poor poorly la'al ones :(

am really missing my Dad? for about three days now he's been constantly in my thoughts, which is unusual - praps it's cos its Christmas? can hear him singing the holly and the ivy?

i've been a proper grumpy bag today? house is a scrow which never helps and i'm knackered? ho hum

He probably knows you miss him.

DD is standing at the end of her cot sceaming...Have no idea why she is waking. Wants mummy to send her to sleep. When I go in she lays down and shuts her eyes..then kicks off before I reach the door.
Lots of angry new screams..and mumbling going on.

Arrgh I just want to take her off to bed with me. Trying to be strong. I know there is nothing wrong tonight. Roll on 8 mins..till I go back in

Hello everyone

Stoof big hug, Christmas is a very emotional time of year... that's really moving that you can hear him singing a Christmas carol.

LBH glad things are better with your DP, and really good luck tomorrow. I hope you get some sleep before going... and fingers crossed your DD will be asleep in a sec.

Sending everyone get well soon fairy dust. I'm very sorry so many of you are unwell.

DD slept from 7 til 5 last night!!!!!
It was amazing!

Unfortunately I didn't sleep very well... woke up at 3, came downstairs, trod in dog shit and then spent an hour cleaning the floor and my shoe! Long story but my Jack Russell escaped yesterday while I was getting DD out of the car after their walk. I didn't notice for an hour as I was busy giving DD her breakfast and putting her down for her nap. I finally got the dog bowls out and no sign of the damn dog! My other dog (the sheep chaser) was looking puzzled... I had to call my neighbours and send them out on a search party as DD was asleep upstairs. An hour later, I got a call from my next door neighbour to tell me the JR was in his garden behind a shrub eating raw chicken! BASTARD .... I left DD with another neighbour while I went in, grabbed him by the scruff of the neck, still eating chicken and put him over my fence on to the wall. I then spent the next hour calling all the different people who'd helped me and telling them he was back ... so who knows what else he'd eaten but whatever it was it ended up at the bottom of the stairs. Thank God I noticed before treading it all over the house... counting the days til I send the dogs to kennels for Christmas... give them some time to think about their behaviour lately -

Aaaaarrrggghh! She has thrown up again. She gets in such a state. She is still awake. We are going backwards. I think DD will win tonight if she doesnt go by half ten DP and I decided he will sleep on sofa and we will co sleep because we have a big day tomorrow.

Looks like CC crying will start again.

FWIW no temp, not chomping on hands,not hungry. Will lay down until I leave the room. I hope I am doing the right thing....Cruel mummy and daddy?

Hi Abs...sounds like your dogs are harder work than DD! Raw chicken

And today is her birthday...now officially 10 months.

Off to get her and off to bed we trot.

Night all.

GF Not having an easy time huh? Hope DS is now firmly on the mend.

BG How's your little one tonight? Hope she's starting to mend. Sounds similar to us-if DS2 was a first baby we'd have been at the out of hours doc yesterday and today as he's been properly wheezy. I have been giving him DS1's ventolin to tide him over till tomorrow morning. The weird thing is that he seems quite well in himself and is eating so not sure it's a chest infection. The annoying thing is that the GP checked DS1's chest on Friday and then assumed that he didn't need to check DS2's as DS1 didn't have an infection . Wish I'd insisted now (as had apointments for both, as I'm supposed to do in such circumstances).

LBH Glad DP is making up for some of his unhelpful comments. Don't let him off too easily - you deserve a huge Christmas present and feel no compulsion to provide hobnobs or blowjobs!! Good luck at school.

Hey Stoof more chocolate from me too.

CC Seems entirely reasonable to me that DD would be dropping a little on the silly (formula-feeding) charts, given her advanced mobility. She has a distinct advantage over DS2, whose massive weight threatens to topple him off his feet daily! I bought him a snow suit last week in size 12-18 months and had to take it back cos it was too small!! There are pros and cons to this weight gain malarky!!

And a final yucky note for tonight don't read over dinner - put DS1 down for his nap this p.m and it all went quiet which we thought was good. Then there was a crash.. Randomly, he had climbed on to his window sill behind his curtains and blackout blind and then filled his nappy (for the first time in about a year). I think he then panicked and put his hand in to clear it up. The result was poo smeared in his hair, all over his pjs, all over the window, the wall, his curtains and blind. ! Luckily, this is familiar to me through work (working with children who have autism) but DH was completely horror-struck. I got the boy into the shower and left DH with the stationary furniture. Hopefully, it was an accidental one-off! What a day!

And on that note..good night!!

Morning all... Hope all the poorly LOs are better today. dd2 slept well last night and had no temperature this morning. I will still take her to the GP in a minute to check her chest again because her breathing is still very fast and shallow and her cough still hurts her. But I think she's over the worst of it.

Beth that's gross Hope it shocked him, too!

mamaloco realised yesterday I am one of the grumpy Germans you mentioned.... not entirely an expat as such but grumpy none the less

watercress all well? You've gone quiet...

Good news on your LOs, GF and BG!

bethylou ewwww....!!! That's one of those golden parenting moments, hey...?!!

Glad to hear you and DH are feeling a bit friendlier with each other, LBH.
Your DD may be backsliding on the sleep because of the 9mo sleep regression - I remember mentioning that sleep training can be tougher at around this time. She's probably experiencing separation anxiety as well - not to mention all the other things she's busy learning (plus teething etc....)
Week 46 (give or take a week or two in either direction) is when the big developmental leap happens, after that, all being well, things should settle down again.

On that note, watercress has been a bit quiet because she too is experiencing an unsettled period with DD2 - probably for exactly the same reasons. She's had some crappy nights lately, hence why she hasn't posted for a bit. I know because I'm such a regular over in Sleep and we've talked on a thread there.

My DD has been getting more and more hyper at bedtime the last few nights and getting progressively more difficult to settle quickly. It's not that she wants to continue feeding, more that she indicates she's ready to go in her cot, but then thrashes around, fidgets and either starts calling "Mama..." or starts to protest. Last night it took 3/4 hr before she relaxed and went to sleep.

SO....I've decided I'm going to alter the bedtime routine and feed her earlier (17.00 instead of 17.30), bath her earlier, then give her some rolling around time to burn up the excess energy from her food, then we'll introduce a quiet time - reading a story and cuddling, before the last feed and putting her down to sleep.

I had been doing all those (except the quiet time) half an hour later, so I'm hoping she'll have a bit more unwinding time with the adjusted routine and with any luck, be more ready to sleep.

We shall see! Like everyone else, we're heading into the second part of the 9mo SR, so that may be why she's more wired.

Anybody got any parenting books on their Father Christmas list?!
I've asked for:
How To Speak So Kids Will Listen...
Playful Parenting
Toddler Taming

I figure all of those will have some useful techniques I may be able to employ as DD gets bigger and discipline etc. starts to become a bigger issue.
My DH said we should just go with our instincts, which is a fair comment, but I don't think parenting (beyond loving and caring for the DCs) is actually instinctive. We've learned it from our own parents and the people we observe around us - and let's face it, not all the techniques they use are necessarily the most effective.
No harm in cribbing from the experts, IMO.

What are your views? Anyone used the above books?

IC interesting DD2 is 46 weeks this thursday. And has been a pain for a few days (tantrums, lots of complaining and very sticky to mama).

We also had to teeth explosion with 3 more and I can see 3 more bubs just below the surface! One side is missing again (bottom left). 11 teeth in total.
Molars out instead of canines, I can't remember if it is the right order or not .

GFBG and bethylou hope everybody is getting better.
bethylou yeeeew
BG
LBH good luck with the jobs. No for your DH.

DD2 is leaving a trail of destruction behind her...

Hello!

Sorry I've been quiet. As IC said, I've been having a hardcore couple of weeks with DD2 - not sure why she has lost her magical sleeping ability, but I've put it down to post-cold clinginess/separation anxiety/nine month sleep regression/starting to crawl/teething... anything really! Suffice to say, I've been having some horrific nights with her (the worst meant I was up with her from 11:30pm to 6am one night) and have just been too tired to post on here. But I have been reading and thinking about you all.

Sounds like we've had a lot of illness between us - hope everyone's LOs are on the mend. beth I do stuff with meds all the time that I probably shouldn't do, but it usually works out, so I'm not judging you!

Some interesting poo stories too, I notice!

Hope those of you feeling a bit down are feeling a bit better - LBH and CC spring to mind, but good vibes, hugs and mulled wine to all x

Oh, and forgot to say in response to IC's question about books - I have Toddler Taming, and find it useful to dip into every now and then, though a little over-simplistic. I also use Penelope Leach's Your Baby and Child, as it does up to "young child" and I think it's a brilliant book. It doesn't tell you what to do, but does explain why things may happen and offer practical advice in a very non-judgemental way. I also like "How to be a happy mum" though I probably shouldn't say that on this site - again, it's very practical.

CC, I also meant to say on the growth thing to try and not worry. There is a range for a reason, and someone has to be at the top and someone at the bottom. My DD2 is really close to the bottom as well (she's just over 16lb now, and she's been FF) and I am not phased by it at all. I'm only going to worry if she shows sustained weight loss - staying the same, or the odd loss because of teething and not wanting to eat, or starting to move and use more energy, are perfectly fine in my book.

I was just reading "how to talk..." last night. Very good advice, seems to work for grown-ups too - I've been using what I have learned from chapter 1 on DH to great effect.

I don't do parenting books, DH got me 2 when I was 8 months pregnant I thought it was the worst present ever! still resent them to this days

LBH yes Xmas shopping done, packed (all licked and chewed by DD2 [boak], hidden in the top cupboard to dry , I have gone for a creased effect on the paper for this year, very in ).

BC you might convinced me to read that book for DH "training". We are also trying the "Cesar" pack leader dog thingy, as we have a bad doggy chewing everything

Basically it says you should never deny anyone's feelings - don't tell them they can't be hungry or they had a nice time or they love someone when they say they don't.

Then if they come to you with a problem don't immediately scold, offer advice, ask questions or offer pity - instead say how you think they are feeing "that's made you pretty angry!" and they will tell you more and often work out their solution themselves. Or if you can't give them what they want say "I wish I had such-and-such so I could give it to".

It hit home because I do deny DH's feelings sometimes (and my mum definitely did that to me when I was little so I guess it is a learned behaviour) - I think it is a great book so far.

I am better from the bug and so is DS. Dh still a little bit under the weather. I made salmon and broccoli fishcakes for lunch today and he ate two whole ones with his hands. I was chuffed and surprised.

I won't mention that the cat got half a one off the plate where I'd left them before I got round to frying them.

Should have read "give it to you."

And the "he" who ate the fishcakes is in reference to DS, not DH.

Oh the perils of posting too quickly.

Heh heh heh, I had an amusing mental image of your DH eating his fishcakes with his hands, BC!

DD has been under the weather too, as have I. I spent most of yesterday in bed, wondering how on earth I'd cope today without DH. Thankfully my fever seemed to burn itself out yesterday evening and I feel a load better today. DD no longer has a temperature, but is still full of snot and phlegm, and very grizzly. I am hoping that we have escaped the D&V bug that's been going round our way recently.

DD has been back on the boob at nights for the past week or so with her illness. Anything for a little bit more sleep. I really had no idea how tiring this parenting lark would be!

Talking of sleep, Abs a while back you mentioned that your DD naps for an hour and a half in the morning. How did you get her to do that...?

We don't have a tree or any decorations up yet . We were planning to do it this weekend but illness got in the way. We are due to be away next weekend, I don't know if we will get around to it this year. I don't feel very Christmassy . No shopping done (although a few foody presents made) and no cake or pudding yet, either. There just doesn't seem to be any time this year.

Glad to hear that your DD seems better BG and to everyone else who has a poorly LO get well soon.

I am trying not to feel too of your LOs' accomplishments. We have no words here, no signs either, no crawling!!, no standing, no walking. She can clap on demand though

By the way IC that's very interesting about parenting not being instinctive. I hadn't thought of it like that, being more of your Dh's opinion that we should go by our instincts. But actually you're right, it is probably more learned, and could perhaps/probably be improved on. Maybe I should add a couple of parenting books to my list.

I'm fine with the children... any husband training advice more than welcome!!

Talking of eating, dd2 hasn't eaten a thing today and only had very little milk... I'm still adjusting to such a different child to dd1 (she only ever once stopped eating two or three meals when she had suspected swine flu, and then still insisted on having a plate and a spoonful of food on it at her usual place at the table, because things have to be done right!)
Took dd2 to the GP and her chest is still clear but the GP prescribed an inhaler to help with her breathing problems.

Mincepies My DD doesn't crawl or walk either... she bum shuffles and reaches forward, crawls backwards but tbh would rather just sit and play. She is starting to move but I wouldn't call it crawling. I'm quite glad really as it means I can put her in her play area and get on with things without worrying too much (for now!) I think they all develop at a different rate. She loves the piano... but that also involves sitting!

You asked about her long morning nap. I think she's just exhausted. She is sleeping pretty well at night now, she is on the boob from about 3 til 7, then we are up for the day, and she is very busy playing, then long dog walk, then breakfast and I put her down at about 10. I really don't 'do' anything... she just wakes up after about an hour and twenty, an hour and a half.... it is brilliant!

I don't have any Christmas decorations up either but we're going away so I don't feel like decorating the house... I've just got too much on to really think about it. I am in the Christmas spirit though, I just don't feel like Kirstie 'Perfect' Allsopp!!! She's made me feel so inadequate!

Good to hear the various illnesses are clearing up!

Ooh, sounds good bc - DH and I could do with that advice for each other at times, too....

Welcome back watercress!

Clapping on demand, MincePies, that's pretty impressive!

Although DD knows the theory (and indeed practice) of crawling, she still hasn't joined the dots to realise that if she does it in a sustained fashion she will move around more effectively.
It was like rolling. It took her ages of being able to roll both ways before she sussed that she could keep going in the same direction if she wanted to.
Anyway, short bursts of crawling mean she's easier to keep an eye on, anyhow...

LBH I hope your meeting went well and that your DD went easily to bed

Mincepies my DS doesn't speak a real language, and don't clap neither. They are all different and have their own rhythm of evolution. Don't worry our DD will catch up soon enough

Glad to hear that our LO are on the mend and their mummy too. DS is much better, the rash is still present but he went back to nursery and me to work even with his infected nappy rash and remained of roseola. Also with no more temprature, he slept through again [sigh of relieve emocotion]

IC the only parenting book I have is The no cry to sleep and I finished by doing CC

I can't believe that Christmas is next week! We've done our tree yesterday and it's still up (I have to confess that it's tied on the radiator pipes just in case) I just miss some presents for my mum and I'll be ready.

Last night was horrendous. I took her to bed with me (stopped crying immediatley) but she was so over tired by this point it was midnight before she finally fell asleep.

Does anyone else's DCs do this....?

She lays down next to me closes her eyes and does one or more of the following:

Thump legs/scratch mattress/scratch headboard/pull hairs on mummy's arm/kick feet/pull toes/pull out dummy and throw it/chew dummy/start humming/stand up/sit down/stare at mummy/lay down on tummy with bum in the air and "hump"/turn over repeatedly.

or this? She wakes up and immediately sits up and then to standing. No wonder she is wide awake and crying at 4am.

I was so cross and frustrated last night especially as I had today planned as a military operation.
Thank god she slept till 6.45am and she was lovely at work.

Fingers crossed they accept my proposal as I only want to go back 3 days. (big fat lie..I dont want to go back at all)

Sorry about the "me" post.