Fab Feb 2009: things that go bump and "mummy, mummy, MUMMY!!!" in the middle of the night

[dinkystinky]

New halloween inspired thread (in honour of this time of year) to talk about our little jekyll & hydes [hgrin]

Is anyone going to be taking their little ones trick or treating this year? We'll be at MIL's for Halloween and she's already told me she has both Danny and DS1 costumes -so it appears that decision has been made for us

Hi all.
Happy birthday to all the lo's I've missed.

Can't believe half term's over already
Back to reality now.

Its the mark of a good half term, it having passed so fast SM. Hope all ok with you and return to work tomorrow goes smoothly.

Have had a nice - and house stuff free - weekend with the boys. Took them to a puppet show (which was EXCELLENT) yesterday - Suitcase Circus - we all loved it! - and playground trip in the afternoon and then went swimming this morning and over to Hackney City farm for play and lunch in the cafe there and then dvds and playdoh this afternoon. As work is stupidly busy again is the most time have spent with the boys all week and they were pretty lovely 90% of the time, so feeling v content with my lot.

Danny, whilst being not much of a talker, is OBSESSED with mark making and has started trying to copy DS1 when DS1 is doing his writing practice at the weekend. It's eerie - turn your back on Danny, and by the time you've turned back, he's found a pen somehow and a surface to draw/scribble on It's like some kind of toddler super power

hello all, back in the land of sand.
happy birthday to all those I've missed in the last week.
STW hope now that you have a formal dx you can move on and things settle down a bit. Cake looked fab on FB by the way.

SM sorry about dp, I do know exactly how you feel, mine is just the same and we are just going round in circles. Plan at the moment is for me and DC to return to UK in summer but we are back for 2 weeks at Easter and if things carry on the way they are I might just stay then.

bumps good to see you back here, thought of you last week when I had my retail therapy at BW.

dinky H is just the same with pens/crayons. Fingers crossed you get back in your newly extended house on time.

Well, nice few days with DD in Dubai on way home. She was over the moon when she found out where we were going and even more over the moon when she met Peter Andre in the waterpark there. she came rushing over shouting 'mum, mum, quick bring the camera' and said Peter Andre was there. I was oh course he is dear and didn't believe her but went anyway to humour her as you do and of course it was him so took her photo with him. He was really nice and friendly. I can't normally be arsed with a lot of the so called celebs but I actually thought he was a really nice guy and from what I've read (in the very limited press out here and during brief UK visits) he has maintained his dignity during his relationship breakdown, unlike that loony he was married to. Unfortunately I only had a cheap disposable camera in the waterpark so I'm praying to god/allah that I can find somewhere to get it developed here and it comes out ok or live won't be worth living

Was lovely seeing H and DD (not so much DH) again. I got to the hotel the day before them to spend quality time with DD1 before they arrived (and DH spoiled it!) - sadly he has a tendency to try to pick a fight with DC1 and 2 (not his) which always leaves me in the middle.

Met them in reception of hotel and H's first word was...................
'booba'. He has dedided NOT to give up much to DH's annoyance although I can't really see why it affects him. Had a lovely cuddly evening with H and a nice few days although DH was a miserable git a lot of the time. Met up with a lovely friend of mine and her DC who live in Dubai and had a nice meal with them. Funnily enough she commented on DH's behaviour and his obvious anger management issues, the slightest thing sets him off now.

Main thing is, when back in UK it really felt like home. Might sound odd but on some visits back it hasn't felt like home and didn't feel 'right' but this time it did and it was good being there (wonders if that was because no miserable git there or children trashing the place as fast as I tidied!)
Find out a month today if DD2 has a place at our local state school and if so, decison made I think. She is registered at a lovely prep school but I don't want to risk DH suddenly changing his mind and pulling the plug on that. I know how stressful it was with DC1 and 2 ensuring they stayed in private school so probably best not to even start going down that route.

I think at Easter I will start making firm plans, hopefully DD2 in local school, H in nursery opposite and have registered him at nursery at 'her' school which he could go to next year and of course he will need elocution lessons as seem to have a problem with his H's. He calls himself 'arry' and went on 'oliday'. Hope he is not going to talk cockney like his dad

Right, off to get him dressed and downstairs and fed. Still our half term here but have signing classes this morning then going on a kids picnic with bouncy castle which should be fun.

Take care all x

mos - glad you are home and hope you get something sorted that suits you and your dcs with regards to dh

MOS - mammoth post there! Will read later x

Just popping on quickly to run something by SR (or anyone else who has done similar)
I am struggling again with both boys behaviour and remember you recommending pasta shell in jar system. Would love to give it a go.
So, tell me if I have it right, I get 2 jars, 1 for each dc, I display them but they don't hold or play with them. I start the day with a few in there and add 1 each time they are good and remove 1 each time the show a behaviour I don't like. At end of day, if they have 5 pasta shells they can have a biscuit before bed or somerthing....... Is that right?
I have been giving stickers for staying in bed all night, but jacob wakes up and will stay in bed until he has had a wee and come through his nappy, so for undesireabke behaviour straight after a positive behaviour I struggle with. If I shout he shouts back so I don't want to encourage that. Am thinking jar may be a good way to reward and discipline?
Thoughts?

Will be back later x

Hi all - stupidly busy at work again.

MoS - lovely to hear from you. Sorry that FW stopped your time with DD1 and H and G being the lovely time it should have been - though sounds like you managed to enjoy it abit despite him which is a good thing. I just cant understand people who persist in ruining a good thing when they have it...

SM - sorry to hear you're struggling with the boys' behaviour. Pasta jar is definitely SR's bag or jar. In our house we use the thinking step - not that much thinking seems to go on while they're there but they realise why what they did was undesirable once its been explained to them...

I use naughty spot and thinking corner too, but I'm thinking, how can I do that for something just after a good behaviour??

I use naughty spot and thinking corner too, but I'm thinking, how can I do that for something just after a good behaviour??

I don't know how successful my jars were tbh... I used them for toilet training with both older kids and used stones instead of pasta. It worked well enough with ds1 but dd just regressed every time we tried to reduce the amount of stones she was getting/how many stones she needed for a reward. With her it seems to instill the idea that 'I'll do it if I'm rewarded but won't bother if i'm not'. But then she's the antichrist-- a difficult child at the best of times so maybe she's the exception to the rule With ds1 it went well and we gradually weaned him off once he was toilet trained. In our case they got a stone for every trip to the toilet and lost one for wetting, when they got to 5/10/15 stones they got a treat... usually a little toy when i was doing the shopping. ds1 did very well on ben 10 toys for a while

For general behaviour though i'm very old school.... they lose a toy/tv/video game/treat or are sent upstairs for bad behaviour, I don't reward expected bahaviour (manners/tidyness) but will praise for above par things like sharing a toy with A even though they had it first, doing something kind, helping without having to be asked, etc.

Agree re expected behaviours SR but i feel that I am at a place now where I have to re-introduce expected behaviours, praise for them and gradually wean off. i have spent so long trying to concentrate on negative behaviour that I really feel I need sometrhing to help all of us re-assess our focus iyswim.
I've explained it to them, jacob seemed to grasp it and was able to repeat to me what will happen, so we will see. this is by no means a long term solution, but a stepping-stone to get us back on track with the small things, if that makes sense.

WTF happened to that post? Why did a load of it come out bold?????

Lol MOS!! Probably. Mine can join him
He's actually been ok past few days. Won't last but I'll enjoy it whilst it does.

We started the jar this morning, went quite well. No morning tantrums. Yay.
I've told the cm, have given her the jars and asked her to do the same. I am only doing it for things I struggle with and they are quite good for her.

Lol MOS!! Probably. Mine can join him
He's actually been ok past few days. Won't last but I'll enjoy it whilst it does.

We started the jar this morning, went quite well. No morning tantrums. Yay.
I've told the cm, have given her the jars and asked her to do the same. I am only doing it for things I struggle with and they are quite good for her.

Hope it is a big naughty step as my DH can join yours there too....

SM I have done a sticker chart for DS when he has had difficult months moments but to be honest I always forget about it and after a couple of days it gets lost. He is happier with a sticker on his jumper rather than counting up how many stars are on the chart and then getting a treat. Hope the jar thing works for you.

Not been at all well the last couple of weeks - more flu I think, only 6 weeks after the last bout . I have been feeling really rough and this week Lilian has had high temperatures and been off her food and awake all night too. I am exhausted.

Calico - poor you! Danny has that high temperature awake all night bug too. Am feeling v sorry for myself as work stupidly busy so am getting home at 11 every night, getting to bed then being woke up/up with Danny for a couple of hours a night, then up again at 6 - but at least I dont have flu...

Sorry to hear about the flu Calico Hope you start to feel better soon, rotten time of year to get sick as bugs seem to linger for ages.

Can any of you ladies who've dealt with chicken pox already give m some advice? There's CP in the village and none of mine have had it so i'm bracing myself for a pox ridden house. DS1 has a single spot on his hand and has a fever since last night.... however he got the 5in1 jab in school yesterday which could account for the fever and i'm not convinced the spot is CP... it's a largish pimple.. red yesterday but it's got a whitish/yellow head on it now today and he says it's sore rather than itchy. He's off school anyway today as he had a rotten night last night and was knackered and still a bit feverish this morning but i don't know whether i should be bracing myself for more to come... did any of your kids get one spot long before the others? Or just one spot at all? What did they look like?

Sounds like your DS1 may have a mild case of chicken pox SR - if its red then crusts over its chicken pox. If his dose is really mild, he might get it again (as wont build up sufficient immunity). Suspect a few more spots may appear during the course of today.

SR sounds a bit like when my DS got chicken pox - he had two spots on his torso and I sent him off to nursery as usual (bad mother!) but they called to say it was definitely the pox. Another 4 very small spots appeared later the next day but that was it. He wasn't itchy with them at all. I think that usually the spots all appear really quickly within a couple of hours which made me think that it wasn't CP at all but my GP confirmed that sometimes only one spot visible with CP.

Another terrible night with Lilian last night - but she is back on her food today so am praying that she is over the worst of the fever. I managed to trap a nerve in my shoulder as I was lifting her out of her cot last night - has been agony. I'm falling apart and feel like I'm about ninety today.....

sounds like pox to me, my 3 youngest all had it in January - hope they don't all get it together SR - dd had it first the 13 days later ds2&3 got it together.

sod's law they'll take it in turns so i have 6 weeks of a pox ridden house.

spot is still there, no more appeared. still have no idea if it's pox or not but he seems to be in good form so if it is it's mild.
Guess time wil tell. Thanks all.

calico... ouch Not what you needed on top of flu. Take it easy and rest the shoulder, trapped nerves can linger and you don't want to do any more damage

SR hope you remain pox free.

Have applied Deep Heat to shoulder - which I don't think will do anything for a trapped nerve but it smells nice

Off to get some kip before the littl'un wakes up...

lol at the deep heat.... it is utterly useless for pain but oddly soothing anyway

No more spots to report although A was in odd humour last night so i'm obsessively checking him. Sod's law I'll waste all this mental energy obsessing about it and they'll avoid it as children altogether and do what dp and his siblings did and get it in their late teens/ early twenties!

These kids have been driving me fucking crazy. I just don't know what to do about jacob not listening to a wword I say. Starting to think he doesn't understand English!
I now have a bin bag of toys sat in my kitchen that I have 'thrown away' due to his behaviour today.

A is on the waiting list for surgery... ENT finally saw him today and said the tongue tie needs snipping so he's been put on the urgent list for surgery. He's have to have a GA and be intubated