Dec 08 Ladies - Waiting for BabyLady & the usual grumpy tots with stinky bots

[DeidreBarlow]

Hope this is ok...

I have just realised how food focused that last post was...it says a lot about me

Thanks for the advice on the sleeping folks, I suspect we have to bit the bullet and try a bit of CC. I am a proper softie (and always in a little bit of doubt as he can occasionally sleep through so I always imagine it's pain/nightmare/hunger that's keeping him awake rather than boredom, as I suspect.) He is quite teethy at the mo but am dosing him with drugs and he's eaten well so will see...
i am also very but have discovered that if I put Teletubbies on iplayer on the laptop while he eats his dinner he does pretty well, whereas without he's just bouncing around and wants to get down pretty much immediately. I KNOW this is a Bad Thing but will have to deal with it when I feel a bit stronger (and have some sleep, will deal with that issue first then return to eating!).

Seller has rejected our first offer, have put in a final one so will see. It's so tedious, this house business, I bore even myself...

DB your evening sounds perfect! So glad DD is settling well into school, sounds like it's all going swimmingly - as with DS (see what I did there?).

Beans, sorry to hear about house of snot, and yesterday's poo/vom explosions. You describe them so cheerfully, I would be feeling much sorrier for myself!

Aaargh DS2 is being a little begger about getting to sleep tonight and I'm going out as soon as I can to meet with some of the girls for wine night. I've got a nice looking muscat rosa (it's a Spanish one as they didn't have the BB). I've still got to scoff my dinner and this one thinks it's time to party.

Spot it's all on hold at the moment because the real estate agent who we thought was so great has gone MIA!!!

Beans sorry about the coughs.

DB so funny about the eating, & not able to fit in cake! I surprised myself by liking Avatar, I think sigorney weaver helped a bit and it's light on the brain cells but pretty.

Ooh that's weird I sent that lastnight but it only just posted when I turned on itouch.

Avatar was a BORE! I suspect it was very spectaular in 3D at the cinema but it was really boring plot and about an hour too long. Mind youI find this with James Cameron films Titanic was dull as dishwater too.

Having said that Forrest Gump and The Goonies are my fave films so I'm no expert

I must be a total nutter - taking 2 to swimming by myself with meltdown man at his worst and a sore shoulder!!! Back in a bit.....

Ok another bad night, I'm hoping that was the evil 2nd night of intervention thing and tonight will be a dream????!! Please tell me it will. In the end I went out at 8.40 after eating my dinner with DS2 wailing and left DH to deal wit it. I got home at about 12.45am and he was asleep but had only dropped off at 11.30! Aparently there was a lot of screaming. He then woke and screamed at 1.30, 3am, 5 am and then finally 6.30 when I gave him his morning feed. There was a lot of screaming there amongst it. He then slept until nearly 9am! But he now is so hoarse poor thing. His breathing is really raspy and he has a terribly hacking cough. I think it is from the screeching. He's just settling off for his nap now and I can hear the rasp everytime he breathes in. I feel terrible but I have to do something!

It's DHs birthday tomorrow & we gave a sitter booked for tonight but I'm just not feeling very good about going out when he's like this. Also we are looking after acfriends child until 7.30 so I'm feeling like it's going to be stressful to get ourselves out.

Plus I'm feeling a teeny bit hungover.

Hi pubes, I think you might be a bit mad. Are you saying it 1045 on a Saturday morning & you've already taken both to the pool!

Yeah Vag, ds's lesson was at 0930 but I had a total babysitting disaster when I forgot dh was working today and mil was away for the weekend!! We had missed so many this term so really wanted to go. Fortunately one of the other lovely Mums who offered before if I got stuck always watches from the side so she minded dd ds was a clingy disaster and the water was colder than usual so I think he got cold, and given the recent rage from himwhen we sing, I decided to get out before the sing song on the raft at the end for the safety of the other babies and mums

Sorry about all the sleeping probs Vag and Spot. Spot what happens if you just leave him when you know all is ok ie hunger nappy etc? If it were me (and was) I'd do the CC for sure. And also yikes Vag, giving the dummy back really? I'd be really nervous to do that.

Spot and anyone else - Sybs? Beans? I think next Wed would be ok with me, but dh is home so if that doesn't bother anyone? But let me just check with him he hasn't got something planned or I've forgotton about anything I'm supposed to be going to with him etc...
Right dd kicking off - better go back in a bit

Thing is Pubes the last week or so he's been using me like a dummy so I don't know that it would be all that different. Like Spot, i keep thinking there is something up because he USED to sleep through. But your right pubes it's not a good idea so start up now and I feel we would have sacrificed the health of his vocal cords last night in vain if we go back now so I think we have to tuff it out.

DB sorry you wasted several hours of your night watching Avatar. After you said it I was baffled as I couldn't remember it being that long. But then I realised we watched it on a night that DS2 was teething and a but unsettled so I kept popping up to see to him but didn't get DH to pause so to tell you the truth all I remember is SW, some big blue people and a scene with some psychodelic flouro colours in the woods that reminded me of a certain chilliut room in south London of the camberwell green.

Hats off to you lot who are still BF - amazing, can't even imagine it.

ds chocked on a mini cheddar yesterday - keeps putting too many in his mouth at once - in the middle of a shop started gasping and spluttering. I ripped him out of the buggy and dh had to do a couple of sharp back blows and out it came

Do any of you have dc's (Dec08) needing to be as independent as my ds? Now I can't even keep him in the trolley at Tesco - wants to walk around and screamed the store down until I let him. Doesn't give a hoot either if he can't see me (I hid when he wandered to the next aisle) - is the general advice to let him have a bit of freedom? He seemed to follow my instructions (a little) and came back when I said turn around come this way etc.... I need some advice from those of you with older dc's now... I find if I keep getting worried about him running off it just makes him worse but a little bit of freedom might be good to teach him that he has to follow what I say without needing reins all the time etc?

Vag how's the hangover? Hope ds is feeling better and sleeps well again soon so you can go out for dh's b'day
dd is wearing her new pressie from Vag - very cute - will try and get a piccy and put on FB Thanks again Vag!

Does it fit ok then. I was happy to hear DD was putting on weight so well but was worried I had taken so long to send the pressie that it wouldn't fit!

With the independence thing I think it's good to let them walk by themselves & wander but obviously you have to do it somewhere safe. When DS1 was little we lived on the isle of dogs so had a lot of traffic free areas to wander around, like canary wharf, mudchute farm and the docks. Now with Jordi we cycle a lot so when we stop places to shop or whatever he either is carried in the sling by me or he walks. If we are somewhere potentially dangerous he has to walk holding my hand if it's safe he gets to roam. I think he knows when I reach out my hand that he has to take it as he always stays close and holds it then. We had a big street party on the big shopping street parallel to ours. All the streets were all closed off so DS2 got to wander free which he loved.

Oh & hangover is improving thanks Pubes. We cancelled the babysitter as DS2 is a bit snotty and still so hoarse and we are still not sure when our friend is coming to pick up her child. We have tentatively rebooked the babysitter for tomorrow night and DH is out getting our takeaway now, yum.

The child we are looking after is a friend of DS1's from school & his teacher has mentioned that she is not 'good for veggieboy'. I thought it was because she speaks English with DS1 (her mum speaks english to her at home) when the teacher is trying to get him to speak more Dutch. However, I think she may think she is a bad influence on him as he has been a complete rotter while she has been with him today. Climaxing inDS2 having his first ever full on tantrum. DH wouldn't buy him chips and he went ballistic, completely mental. I've never seen him in such a state. I feel terrible thinking that another child can be a bad influence but he does seem really naughty around her. Very different.

Sorry that should have read DS1 having his first tantrum, DS2 has def had a few of those.

Just back from a horrific outing. DS went mental at Tesco - totally mental. Granted he was tired as almost his bed time, but I picked up dh from the station and he needed to stop and look at a laptop at Tesco and ds wanted to walk instead of sit in the trolley of course, so that was fine, but this time he wouldn't stay near us, so we put his backpack on with rein which really annoyed him, and he started mildly kicking off. He then noticed that he could move the trolley (push it around himself) so that was fine until he wanted to push it too far away and we needed to stay to talk to the techy computer guy. So he screamed and screamed and screamed when we stopped him, until dh had finished (dh refuses to let him rule our plans) and dh then had to carry him kicking and screaming out of the shop (I'm talking blood curdling screaming). I had forgotten I had put a couple of items in the bottom of the trolley(dd was on the top in her carseat) and I was so mortified I actually made a bee line for the car forgetting to pay! Obviously went back and paid but I am so upset (after this mornings tantrums at swimming as well, but mainly as I know if dh hadn't been there I wouldn't have been able to physically deal with ds, especially while I have dd as well (not to mention buggered shoulder) Anyway, am I destined to online shop forever or only go when dh comes with me? Now that he's had a taste of walking in the grocery store, he will never let me put him in the seat part again I'm guessing? Please tell me this stage will pass - and / or how I should deal with it? I'm about one more public tantrum away from calling Supernanny!

P.S. Yeah it fits great Vag - very cute (so you can imagine how teeny she is)

Oh Vag - you read my original post on the day I got the pressie and card in the mail didn't you? I suddenly thought maybe you thought I didn't say thanks as I posted the day it arrived - or at least I thought I did! Oh I'm so sleep deprived

Yeah of course Pubes, sorry I didn't refer to it. To be fair to you & DS, yes you probably wouldn't have coped without DH, but then if it hadn't been for DH you wouldn't have been there while poor old DS was tired. Tantrums are a mare but I've noticed with DS2 there is usually a reason, either tiredness or attention seeking (I've found DS2 squeaks a lot or is naughty when I'm on MN).

Yeah Vag - in thinking about it - it was right before his dinner time that we were at the supermarket and he was also knackered from swimming (and his tantrum there) He had a 2 hour nap and woke up fine but to be honest I knew he was still really tired before I even put him in the car this afternoon. Not to mention he has 3 teeth only a third of the way through and has been off his food randomly this week as well. I know it will happen again but hopefully not nearly as bad if I don't take him at a time when everything is against us!

On a positive note, he said "no" about a million times today, but at least he's speaking instead of just throwing himself on the floor!

Right I've taken over the thread way too much today.

Hello kids

Rubes, I am so sorry for you about the meltdown in the store. It's awful when they do that. As for the swimming, I think taking two was v brave. I have looked in my Toddlercare book (it's a good book, but I haven't looked at it for ages as I look where DD is supposed to be with her gross motor skills and I just get all worried) and it says if they have a tantrum at home, as long as they are safe, either remove yourself or them until it's over: and if you are out, either ride it out and completely ignore it as tantrums thrive on attention like petrol powers a car (I am a bit about this as it's pretty hard in a shop - and O has had them on the train) or else remove them from the scene. It says under no circumstances a) give in or b) lose your own temper. And don't c) offer bribes, or d) issue threats. All easier said than done, I know from experience...I think you've got to say to yourself they all do it, it's horrendous and yes, it will pass. Like you say, he is very independent and it's a great thing actually, and will stand him in good stead later, though it seems hard now.

DB, thanks for the tip off about Avatar - I was a bit dubious about it anyway but wondering if I ought to see it. DP is watching Pelham 123 (the remake) and it's all a bit shouty, with blurry shots and too much music.

I am sorry your nice evening was scuppered, Veg, what a shame. Last night sounds like hell on wheels. Dummy - well, if you think it will help. Maybe as a short term thing if you are worried, sort of use it to get him back into good habits with his sleep again?

Beans, how are your poor coldy girls? Thumbsucking I discourage as I worry about teeth but that's largely because of my paranoid dentist SIL

Spot, it's a bit of a poser about T. I don't think 1.5 hrs nap in the day is excessive, far from it. What about a programme of chasing around for a bit to get him tired, then a soothing bath and calming music? As for Teletubbies, if he eats more that way bugger it, I say...

Right, must catch up with last week's SUnday papers before tomorrow's come. Feeling v tired, with just a week and a half to go. We didn't do a full day on the house today and I am feeling guilty. I am also fed up with people in shops commenting on how high my bump is, esp when they hear how little I have got to go. Yes, I do know this, and still have the heartburn to prove it.

Rubes - in case it is of any help, my DD is and always has been perfectly capable and willing to wander off without giving us a second thought. Also refused to sit in the buggy, have reins etc once she was up on her feet. The only absolute hard and fast rule I have is no crossing roads etc without holding hands, which she actually respects and always has done. In fact, she is normally pretty sensible and doesn't tend to do stuff that is unsafe, but of course if they are disappearing out of your sight, then its not just what they get up to you worry about. Having said that, I tend not to worry overmuch and quite enjoy her independence. Personally I find shopping centres etc far the hardest as she seems to think it is quite a safe environment and wants to roam freely, and it is hard to expain why it isn't. The whole insisting on walking etc thing does wear off though - DD used to stubbornly refuse to go in the buggy, or a trolley at the supermarket, but at some point figured out that it wasn't such a terrible thing to be pushed around. So don't dispair.

Sorry not to do more personals - life has been a bit hectic for me and not managed to get on much. New work is great, but we're all readjusting to the time I need to give to it. Woke up at 4 this am worrying about work stuff I haven't managed to get to, hence early morning posting...

Spot meant to comment lastnight about your tv dinners. As far as I can see surely at this age it's better to encourage enjoyment of time at the dinner table. We were always told not to have toys at the dinner table but letting DS1 play with his trains was 'the only way we could get him to sit and eat. We didn't have TV in the kitchen where our table was when he was little but at times when he was really difficult and we were tired of the stress of feeding we would take his highchair to the livingroom and give him finger food & let him at it. He usually finished it all. Now he always sits nicely at the table & eats most of his dinner. Obviously everynow & then we have TV dinners with his little ikea table & chairs in front of the tele. Anyone who tells me I'm wrong should try to sit down & feed the 2 year old version of DS1 for a week.

LadyT how bizarre to comment on the hheight of your bump?

Well lastnight was a full right off our friend finally came to pick up her daughter at 10pm! Then DH felt sorry for them & drove them home so we got dinner at 10.15 & only watch a little of the movie we'd set to watch. It's called Four Lions & is a bit of a dark comedy I think. It looked ok what we watched lastnight but that was only 30mins.

DH's birthday so the boys & I made him breakfast in bed

Oh & Lady I think I was confused, I thought the tearing was your old CS scar, but you said it's on the top of the bump. I think I'm happier to hear it's not the scar as was quietly feeling like maybe they should deliver you a little earlier, I was worried it might rupture or something. I'm not sure of the consequence of this other tearing. Did she explain it.

Happy Birthday to your DH, Veg. Four Lions is the Chris Morris thing, isn't it? I have ordered it on LoveFilm.

Oh no, not my old scar thank goodness. The pain is much higher up (very top and sides of my bump) and is inflammation/subsequent slight ripping of the muscle. Apparently athletes can get it, and more rarely, preggoes! She didn't explain the consequences of it, I think nothing until it gets very serious (I read online that they will deliver early if it is agony) but as I am not even taking the cohydramol every day, and then only once a day, and haven't needed the full blown codeine, I think I am ok. I have had to throttle back a bit on the physical activity though. It's not rocket science I know, but I have finally figured out that if I really push myself for hours on end, I feel really ill at the end of the day A bit slow to catch on, me.

My sister, BIL and youngest nephew are coming to help us on the house again next weekend, for one day, maybe two, but I just don't think we are going to be moved in before DD2 The logistics of moving the furniture from my storage in London before then just don't pan out, even if we finish the house (or enough to move in) - DP has a trial all this week, and I have to go to London on Weds and stay in for the painters painting the outside of DP's building on Tuesday as they need indoor access.

Invis, hope you find a rhythm soon with the new job. Big sympathies on the fretting in the night!