May 2010 - Drooling, smiling, cooing and nearly sleeping through (and that's just the mummies!)

[rachelfruitloop]

Hi Ladies,

I hope you don't mind, I started a new thread as our first one was quite full! I can't believe we're a quarter-way through the first year already!

Rachel great news re Bruce, will keep thinking of him

WLTK enjoy hols. Hope you get some rest

Molly my DD was up screaming in the night on Weds night. She is only 2.7 but the following day I genly broached the suject of what was wrong, she has been awful for weeks now, lots of trantrums/crying/weeing bed etc and she said that she is "angry". I asked why and she said "just want mummy" and I was trying to say but mummy is here, you've got mummy and she burst in to tears and said just mummy. I think she means not Alex but doesnt dare say it bless her.

DH has taken them both out for the day as i have a uni essay to write and submit. shouldnt be on here really they had just left in a rush when I suddenly realised its the first time away from Alex for me and i felt tearful

we arent getting on at all angel but keep telling myself its temporary whilst we are so tired.

we are away for a week so catch up properly soon. good luck to bruce

Mollycuddles - congratulations on being approved as a trainer :) My BIL trained as a GP a few years ago, it sounded very intense. I'm OK thanks, cold got really bad yesterday but DH is off today so I've had a long lie-in and feel better already. Hope your DD1 is OK.

WLTK - hope you have a nice visit home, must be very exciting :)

Rachel - hope Bruce is still doing well.

Angel - hope you're OK.

I was quite teary to hear about the new Cameron baby too. My DNephew was born in Truro (although DSIL had a nightmare time there with an EMCS :( )

HB- Agree with the others, If she seems happy enough then she maybe just a tiddler. DD1 went through a big phase of being too distracted and we had to turn the tv off or take her to a new room if others were about!
Did the HV seem worried at all?

Rachel- Fingers crossed for little Brucie (fab Name!) Must be a worrying time for everyone.

SK- Glad Jacobs doing well.

First- I told my DH about the job and he agrees that they are on shakey ground there!

Tomlin- I have a Lemon drizzle cake in the fridge that im working my way through

Wibblea- Waves :)

Molly- Welcome to Bubbles
Congrats on the training approval.

WLTK- I took cream cakes to hers on monday... Always a winner :)
Enjoy your holiday!

Pamlet- :( that DD is struggling with Alex's arrival. Im sure its a phase and will pass- although that doesnt help you much now.
Enjoy your break :)

Off to a friends this afternoon. Our DD's have known each other since birth and play so nicely together. However shes a childminder too so there will be 5 under 3's today. Busy busy! :)

Looking forward to the bank holiday weekend, just hoping for some sun!

Hi all

Quick question - Sophie has started to get frightened by loud noises especially if she is feeding. If DH sneezes whilst feeding she starts to cry.

I was hoovering yesterday and she went mental! Good excuse not to do the hoovering .

Anyone else noticed this happening with their baby?

She had her 3rd set of jabs yesterday. 3 jabs bless her. Not happy at the time but calpol after evening feed and she was fine - phew.

rachel Everything crossed for baby Bruce and his parents.

First That must be illegal. If you think the job is worth it and you have the energy then you should report them. Can you get your doc to sign you off work for x amount of time?

Happy holiday to WLK and pamelat. DH is off for the next 2 weeks - yeahy! First break since his paternity leave so really looking forward to it. Next Friday we are going to Cornwall with my parents, Bro and SIL and their 3 month old. Will be entertaining!

Moosey/pigley - I did complain. Marched (well I toddled but with anger in my step!) into HR and said they're discriminating me on late grounds of ill health. Said I already was in contact with a solicitor for other reasons and would quite willingly bring this issue up legally too. Have an appointment with the MD on Tuesday, but was told there had been "a misundertanding" and that "we are sure the situation can be rectified promptly".

Grr! But thanks for all your concerns.

rachel My prayers are with Bruce tonight.

pamelat / wltk have fab holidays, I'm jealous!

molly congrats!

Seeing consultant for followup tomorrow morn.

MooseyMoo - Corin hates loud noises. He noticeably jumps and then starts to cry. DD never did it, so guess it's just something some of them do. Both of mine have been scared of the hoover though (not for long - DD loves it now and rides it )

First1 - hope the MD can clear it up for you, sounds like they're quite scared.

Pamelat - hope you had a nice break today :)

Hi everyone
Just wanted to say thank you so much for all your thoughts and kind wishes. My mum is doing much better now, she is still in Edinburgh Royal Infirmary. She got really sick suddenly while they were there, eventually she had been sick so much that she collapsed. Dad rang NHS direct who sent an ambulance after listening to her breathing on the phone. It turned out that she had a hernia in her pelvic girdle (caused by scar tissue from her hysterectomy) which had blocked her bowel, then caused an infection. So they sorted out the hernia and removed a section of bowel. She is much better, but still in hospital because she can't stop being sick.

I went up last Sunday and DH did do really well (with lots of help from his mum ) He brought all the DC up from Tues to Fri, so I could be with both (it was fun squashing all 6 of us into a premier inn family room!)Then we drove home last night, think I'm going back tomorrow, as my dad wants some help to bring mum home.

Sorry for no personals, have got 4 pages to catch up on. Hope everybody is okay - and thank you again

Good for you first sounds like they realise they were being jerks.

TCH - love the image of your DD riding the hoover

kateyjane - So sorry to hear about your mum but sounds like she is on the mend.

Having some friends over tonight for dinner - roast lamb. Hmmm. Hope you are all having a good weekend.

Thanks everyone for your congratulations.

first1 - glad you're fighting your battles. Good luck with the meeting.

mooseymoo - Molls hates loud noises too, apart from when she's feeding. Nothing distracts her then.

kateyjane - glad your mum is on the mend. Sounds tough. Hope when it all calms down you have a chance to recover too.

pigleychez - I love lemon drizzle cake. Diet not so good this weekend.

wltk - have a great break. Hope you can pop in as you'll be missed.

pamelat - hope you have a nice break too. I am a big fan of the book "Sibling Rivalry" by faber&dazlish (I think). It says for good feelings to come (about a new sibling) then bad feelings have to come out. Your dd sounds articulate enough to have a conversation about alex. I would set it up by having some nice mummy/daughter time and after over a drink say to her that she seems unhappy and you think she's struggling with her baby brother and get her to start talking. Then let her talk without trying to solve it or say she doesn't mean it if she says she hates him or wishes harm on him (that's really hard). Keep saying you know she feels bad etc. She'll hopefully let it all out and will be reassured that you love her still and even though she's feeling bad. That approach can really release the pressure she's clearly feeling in a better way than her current naughtiness etc. I don't think it's ever too early to learn that feelings aren't to be stifled and that our parents accept us even when our feelings and thoughts aren't "nice". Obviously she needs to know what behaviours aren't ok but that is different.

Well my older dcs are away for the weekend and it's lovely here so if Miss Molly ever comes off the boob we're going out for a walk and a coffee/ice cream.

Hi all! Just having 5 minutes while I am waiting for the cake to finish in the oven!! Not one I've tackled before and with all the kids hinderance help the kitchen looks like a bombsite!! Oh well!! Hopefully at the end of it we will have a yummy chocolate cake, (even though I am on a diet!! Supposed to be (D)Hs birthday on tuesday so I suppose he can make do with our efforts as an early birthday cake!!

DD3 hates her harness and it breaks my heart having to put it back on her after shes had her 'time out' from it, she cries and cries

I have been indulgind in my buggy fetish, lol. I ordered the new zapp the middle of july and they kept delaying the release so meanwhile I bought a silver cross dazzle (rediced from £160 to £75!!) which is nice but the handles are a bit high. Anyway, the the zapp wasn't supposed to arrive til end of september but it came yesterday!! dd3 LOVES it! We went for a walk to the shop this morning and the bucket seat, though not for everyone, actually gives her little legs something to rest on in her horrid harness!!

As for me and (D)H, we are trying. We spend most evenings together, even if it is just sat on the sofa nattering. He says he feels closer to me than he has done in a long time. I am reserving my judgement for now, but it's a step in the right direction I suppose and at least we are both trying...

Kateyjane, glad to hear your mum is doing better. I hope she is completely better very soon

molly enjoy your icecream!!

rachel my thoughts are with Bruce

moosey yes dd3 is the same. She screams mid feed if anything makes her jump!!

OOOOH cakes ready!!! Back later!!

Hi Ladies,

I haven't heard anything further about baby Bruce so I am assuming that no news is good news for now. Thank you all for your words of support, I have let my friend know that she has lots of people praying and thinking good thoughts for them.

Mollycuddles I got that Siblings Without Rivalry book you recommended a couple of weeks ago and I have found it to be a great resource for dealing with my DS1. Things have certainly gotten better in that department.

I am not doing great here, feeling very depressed. I have to go out every day with the two of them otherwise DS1 acts up more. I struggle some days to drum up plans with other people. Yet there is this whole community of support with you lovely ladies on here and I read and would love to be able to respond more but yet I do not get a moment to myself ever. It is terribly isolating. As I write this I am being asked to find a toy and Eric is screaming in my ear teething and now being climbed on by DS1 ... Pre school starts on Thurs, is there light at the end of the tunnel?

Rachel - let's hope that everything is OK with Bruce, I've been thinking about your friend :)

Sorry you're having such a tough time :(

Angel - glad things with you and DH are getting better. So sorry about DD3's harness, that must be really hard. How long does she need it on?

Kateyjane - so glad to hear your mum is OK and on the mend. Best wishes for a speedy recovery for her :)

Not been on for a while . Been away for a while and out lots.

Can I ask quick question?]=

Anyone moved LO out of their room yet? Know guidelines are 6 months, but have angelcare breathing sensor. Basically any small noise wakes Sam up including us turning in bed or DH snoring (not a small noise). Was thinking of giving it a go. Sam 14 weeks old.

Promise to catch up soon!

oh rachel. I hope things improve for you. Please keep an eye on it and if you feel really really down, please ask for help.

Heffa, we don't know. Her hips have to reach a certain measurement. Could be weeks, could be months....next appointment 16th sept so go from there i suppose.

Sassles we moved DD1 out of our room when she was 12 days old as she was disturbing us and we were disturbing her; DD2 moved out when she was about 8-9 weeks and after a week of her in a room on her own, we moved DD1 in with her (had always been our long term plan to have them share, but wanted DD2 to get used to not being in our room/being in a cot bed before putting DD1 in there as well). With both of them, it helped them go longer without waking in the night as I had been jumping up to feed the minute I heard them stirring whereas they have to make more noise now for me to hear them. I know that the recommendations are 6 months and I would get flamed by a lot of people for this, but it worked for us. I insist on things like sleeping on their backs as the evidence is there to prove that it reduces the incidence of SIDS but I don't see how sleeping in the same room as us versus in the room next door can make that much of a difference.

rachel hope things get better for you soon. At least when the good days happen, they are very good and help make the memories of the bad ones disappear...

Better go, DD1 waking from her nap

Sassles - we moved DD out of her room at 7 weeks because we kept waking her up. It made me quite uncomfortable (and sad) but she slept so much better. Her room was across the hallway and we had all doors wide open so hopefully she could still hear us (she always slept silently so didn't make any difference for us really). It worked for us, and I don't think we could have kept her in our room - even if I just turned over she'd wake up and need a bottle to get back to sleep.

Angel - :( not knowing how long. Hopefully the appointment on 16th September will go well. Have you found a way of BFing her or was it too difficult?

Just catching up :o

Rubbish day here today, dh is working all weekend till 8-9pm :( and after dd1 vomited Wednesday and Thursday dd2 started last night and is still vomiting now :(. She's still smiling between bouts of sickness and sleeping, bless her, but it's never gone on for so long. This is the fourth or fifth lot of vomiting from her since she left hospital. The gp said she must just be a sickly baby and the hospital registrar was more concerned about her poos tbh but can't help worrying about her.

Don't know if any of you caught my fb status yesterday but that pretty much sums up today too, soaked to my knickers in sick and dd1 has played up all day as we've been stuck in the house. :(

Moan over, dh is on his way home in twenty mins with a chinese.

Heffa - thanks for the congratulations, the results mean as much to me as the kids and even more to my new boss when I go back to work after ml.

SK - we've been having a complete lack of sleep here too, Grace stopped sleeping through about two weeks ago for no reason and then they've both been up this week vomiting. It's a killer functioning when so tired. :(

Tomlin - thanks for the reassurance re formula feeding, I think I've come to terms with it now and Grace seems so happy about it too. We got an unsatisfactory in our Ofsted in Feb 2009 and then moved up to satisfactory in Feb 2010, it was either that or special measures. You may remember how stressed I was about it on many of the post natal threads. Glad it's over and we're on our way up, as for more money, I won't hold my breath. :( P.S. Love filing :)

Rachel - glad Bruce is out of surgery, my fingers are still crossed for him and his family. It's such a hard time for all his loved ones.

WLTK - have a great break :)

Sassles - we moved Grace out at about 10 weeks but she's been back in ours a lot lately, generally at some point between 2-4:30am.

HB4 - As for weight gain, well you know it's been an issue with Grace too and I've worried loads over it, however, everyone from the hv to the consultant aren't worried if they're happy, feeding and producing plenty of wet nappies.

Molly - congratulations on becoming a gp trainer, well done :)

wibblela - nice to hear from you :)

Pamelat - I bet your looking forward to your break. Well done on getting your essay done, it's a great feeling when they're finished. :)

Moosey - dd2 sleeps through the hoover, pity it's not on that often :o Lamb sounds delicious.

First1 - well done for complaining, hope the follow up went smoothly. :)

Katey - glad your dm is getting better, she's had a very similar op to Grace though I imagine her recovery will be tougher :(

Angel - glad you and dh are moving in the right direction, communication is the key. Your chocolate cake sounds delicious too. :)

Well off to get plates out for tea and hang yet more washing up, going to run out of babygros and towels at this rate.

hi Everyone,

Quick post from me before i turn in for the night. Always reading to see how all are doing but just don't find time to post.

rachel sending you a big hug. Having 2 DC is so tricky. I'm trying not to wish this time away but am looking fwd to when they can entertain eachother & get along. Keep us posted with brucie's news.

moosey we had roast lamb for lunch! We went to see my brother who's a shepard so got to tuck into one of his finest. Hope you enjoyed yours too.

Sorry to be brief, Harry was a little monkey in the night last night & not banking on an improvement tonight. Maybe it's time for him to move out of our room too ...

My attempt to catch up on last week:

pigley thanks for tips on baby books

cupcake pleased you're having fun with the sitting too

MollyC how does little Molly get on with her Bumbo? I sniped a red on ebay one this week too but I'm not convinced he's very comfortable in it.

ML how are things developing re your house? That's such bad luck to have that happen two years in a row. Would declaring yourself homeless mean you can get more reliable accommodation from a Housing Association or similar? Fingers crossed that you get somewhere nice for christmas and long term this time.

Den at the massage class I went to they did suggest all sorts of things to help with constipation. Clockwise circles on abdomen and strokes from baby's right to left, pushing knees to tummy, or holding soles of feet together and moving them in clockwise circles etc - can all help apparently. We've just moved on from 10 poos a day to once every two days. I've been trying some of the above out and I'm not sure they made any difference.

hollyoaks Well done on the exam results but sorry for all the sick! Our boy throws up a lot too. I'm not sure if it counts as reflux. Often it happens if we've been moving him around a lot and he doesn't seem to be upset by it, but he sometimes screams and arches his back when he's feeding and then produces a bit of wind that includes a bit of sick :( He certainly always wears a bib these days and he may be starting to use the muslin cloths that follow him about as comforters :)

Moosey my little one is the opposite. He sleeps through all sorts of things. The noise has to be very sudden and close to startle him. I'm constantly amazed that when we're out loud traffic and sirens just feet away hardly ever make him stir.

Angel hope your DD3's hip brace does its job well and quickly. Good for you and (D)H to keep working at it. DH and I nearly split up about 6 years ago. If it hadn't taken so long to sell the flat we jointly owned we probably would have. It was grim for a while and it took years to put it behind us, but we did in the end. Good luck to you both.

Rachel Keep us posted about Bruce, I've been wishing him and his parents all the strength they need. I keep counting my blessings too, we are all very lucky to have our healthy new arrivals. Sorry you've had a hard week.

Hat's off to all of you struggling with two or more children and their sibling rivalries. Can't be easy!

I've been struggling with blocked ducts again this week. They were astonishingly painful yesterday but much better again by this morning. I'm hoping to find out why I keep getting them at clinic appointment next week.

I met a friend's 9 month old baby last week. I couldn't believe how grown up she was, or that she'll be in the same year at school as our babies. It really is going to go so quickly isn't it!

sorry guys, just trying to read everyone's posts since i was last in, no chance of personals i am afraid.

virginia is now going 3 hours between feeds, day and night and is feeding for longer each time, guess she is getting hind milk now and not just top ups.

thought i had got over broodiness but it was just a blip, now back to broody again but DH seems more positive about it, might have something to do with his " adult "children behaving blody appallingly lately.

any news on bruce yet? i do hope he is ok, do his parents have an fb page so we can all post our good wishes? may cheer them a teeny bit to know others are thinking of them.

love to you all

Ranty me post. The older dcs have been away so it's just been me, dh and Molls. Thought me and dh had Bern connecting better lately but was clearly my imagination. We are so not on the same page. He's now saying he feels that his days of looking after babies were over. Should have thought of that a year ago really. He doesn't want another after all. I am not sure either way but it's only two weeks since he said he did. He's feeling neglected and not happy about lack of sex. I have no interest at all but have dtd a few times. He wants Molly into her cot - we cosleep and it feels right and has been going so well. I think he mainly wants her out for more sex. He was moaning about money and financial planning. He has shown no interest in that for years since he took ill and I've done a good job coping with us going down to one income for the last four years and we are holding our own even while I'm on mat leave. I can't be added with him tbh. It's like having a fourth child. Bleurgh.

Hi All

Just come back from a weekend at MIL's. Not had a very good time really - she always comments to DH on the phone that she "never" sees the grandchildren, feels that my family "take over", etc etc so we make the effort to take a three year old and a three month old 2.5 hours in the car to a village in the middle of nowhere, and she spends NO time with them. Hasn't played with them, hasn't held DD1, doesn't communication with DS1 at all. Took DS1 out to see to the horses without asking me (I hate horses after an nasty accident when I was younger), I was looking all over for him, and then when she came back told me blithely that she had been teaching him how to approach the horses from the front but not from the back but "he wouldn't go near them" [probably because he was terrified], and then told me how the cows had been "a bit close" [translation: within kicking or knocking over distance]. She knows that I don't want him too near any livestock whilst he is so young as he won't be able to read the warning signs that they aren't happy and he needs to back away. I was bit frosty after that, not sure whether I am being unreasonable or not because he wasn't actually harmed, and I don't want him to be frightened of animals, but it's just the not asking and taking him out of my sight when she knows that I don't like the horses or cows that grates on me. She also has a partner (not DH Dad) who doesn't like children and spends all his time huffing and puffing and coming out with phrases along the lines of all children should be subjected to physical punishment when they are naughty, and children should be seen and not heard. Makes my blood boil. So, stupidly, I end up spending the whole weekend trying to keep DS1 and DD1 quiet and out of the way of the partner, trying to keep an eye on where DS1 is in relation to various animals/ponds/chemicals/machinery and trying to be civil to all concerned for the sake of DH. And for what?! To be told in a phone call next week that we don't go over to see them enough. I wonder why?! GRRRRR!!

Anyways, rant over. No more visits until Oct half term, as I have put foot down and said we aren't going anywhere in playschool term time. And it will be the sort of place that the kids will love to visit when they are a bit older and can watch out for the dangers, but when they are this young it all just feels like a nightmare [control freak emoticon needed].

On to more important matters - good news about Bruce, I hope he is doing well.

WLTK - have a great hols.

Molly/Schipo - DD1 loves her Bumbo - she sits in it on the breakfast table in the morning and really tries to join in the conversation! I think it is nice for her to be up with us and not on the floor or in her bouncy chair. DS never had one because he had real nappies and by the time I found out about Bumbos, he was too big for them.

Rachel - take it easy on yourself and don't try to do too much. Do you have a garden that DS1 could run around in? My DS is just the same, so much energy it is unbelievable. We go out even in the rain, just to walk down to the local railway line and watch the trains go past. Our latest brilliant buy was a trampoline for DS1's birthday - we put it under a gazebo and he can bounce on it even in the rain. We went for the Little Tikes trampoline (ordered from Tesco Direct) suitable for 3 - 6 year olds. Wouldn't be without it!

HBM4 - well done on the feeds!

Rooms - we moved DS1 out of our room when at 12 weeks when he dropped the night feeds. DD is still in with us and will be until she drops the night feeds as well. It is just so easy to wake up, put her on the boob whilst sitting in my nice warm bed, and then popping her straight back in the crib without having to get all cold. Helps me get back to sleep more easily as well, because I never really wake up iyswim.

Molly - well done on the GP training!

First1 - well done on the job - at the "misunderstanding".

Kateyjane - I hope your Mum is on the road to recovery soon, she will be in my prayers.

Well, we are off to a barbecue tomorrow with some really good friends, really looking forward to it. Hope the weather holds up. We have had terrible weather at MIL's this weekend, driving rain and the wind whistling round the corner of the house was unbelievable. The kids were freezing at night time (partner doesn't believe in keeping the heating on at night) so have been piling them up with blankets and going to sleep in jumpers! So many grrs that I could write - I have to let it go...and breathe.....

Molly. Sounds like you are in need of a hug.
Your DH sounds just like my exh (but hopefully without the violence). He needs to just accept that this is life right now, you can't go back and change thingsm meantime, as my counsellor told me often, you need to focus on your own happiness. AnD of course on your children. They will soon grow. I don't co sleep with virginia as I am worried that DH will roll on her, he sleeps too well but I did with older girls. It works. If yor DH wants to move her is he willing to be the one that gets up and brings her to you for feeds and cuddles and then pt her back to bed every time?

Tomlin, aagh sounds super stressful. Poor you!
Why not insiist on them coming to you until DCs are old enough to be safer.

Yes I know its late but fed baby an hour ago and can't hget back to sleep.

Hollyoaks - hope both your DDs feel better today and you have a good bank holiday :)

Schipo - the time does really go soooo fast. We were organising all our photos the other night and it seems like yesterday that DD was tiny.

Molly - :( sounds like you need a hug. Men seem to struggle with just accepting life as it is. As a compromise could Molly go in a sidecar cot? C is next to me in a sidecar so I can watch him and cuddle him, and if he needs feeding I just roll closer and get him fed but DH and I have space to be next to each other. we just took the side off the cot we had and put it up next to the bed and then made it a bit safer.

Tomlin - that trip sounds like a nightmare! Not surprised you don't want to go to them. Could you say to them that if they want to see the DCs they'll have to visit you?

We've got a family picnic today and seeing DH's real Dad since he's not met C yet. He's only seen DD twice - is a nice guy but a bit feckless. Still, always nice to catch up with him I guess. I'm still feeling poorly though, and C has caught my cold now :( DH is away next weekend for a stag weekend so not looking forward to that.