Boris said he is very sorry rules were broken, and he takes responsibility for that happening on his watch, but surely every one can see that he couldn't possibly have known, as he never knew where he was going or what he was doing or what was going on, and he was just moved around by his officials and they told him what to say and do at all times, and he never questioned it, and he couldn't see parties of 40 people standing in front of his door when he went in, and he never touched anyone's pen, so it was ok to touch their wine glass, and also, they did have perspex screens, in the room next door to where the party was happening, so that ok.
Also, because people in government were stressed and working hard, then it was necessary to provide them with parties and alcohol for morale, and he was only doing his job.
He has never lied, because he just says what he is told to say, and cant be expected to know if it is the truth or not
I think that just about covers it.