To think some posters need a "reality check" re. views on benefit changes

[lesley33]

I have some concerns about some of the proposed changes to benefits and how these may adversely affect people. So this is NOT a thread about that. But I am getting increasingly fed up at some of the frankly ridiculous reasons some posters are giving against the proposed changes. Examples include:

1. That children 12 and over will be traumatised if both parents work - even if second parent only works 20 hours a week.

1. That a parent with children 12 and over shouldn't have to commute up to 90 minutes each way to work. Far from ideal I know and if someone is on low wages this might not be affordable. But perfectly doable.

1. That childcare is impossible to get for teenagers. Ignoring the fact that many parents, myself included use a combination of kids home alone and afterschool activities.

AIBU to think some people need a reality check? Plenty of people with children already work, many with both parents working full time by the time their kids are teenagers. Plenty of people have long commutes, struggle with childcare, etc. Things might not be "ideal", but these are things that many many working parents already do.

'The 'baby addition', which was paid to families with children under the age of one, stopped from 6 April 2011'

From Directgov.

'Who will it affect? Families with a child under one will no longer have this element included from 6th April 2011. The details of how this will work are not yet known, but anyone who has a child born after 5th April 2010 may see a reduction in their tax credits from April 2011 rather than from the date their child?s first birthday.'

Alouisee - yes, in a perfect world, my twatty Ex-H would get off his arse and go out to work and pay maintenance - but he has told me that he will let the DWP stop ALL his benefits, and him live under a bridge, before he gives me a PENNY for DS1. .

So no, I CAN'T get him to support me. . If I could, then maybe we would still be married. He worked right up until I was 6 months pregnant, then gave up his job, and told me it was my place to look after the dc, go out to work and do all the housework. While paying for childcare for the dc because it 'wasn't his job'. While he screwed some other woman in our bed. .

He hasn't worked since,and DS1 is almost 10yo. But this benefits cap STILL won't make him go out to work. He'll just carry on doing dodgy deals etc. While it's people like ME that will suffer. I am disabled and I have worked for 4 out of the last 8 years. He hasn't worked in a decade.

Well he can do the childcare then.

'if you are able to pay childcare without the help of tax credits youre obviously so well off....' blah blah blah.
Tax credits didn't even exist when many of us were paying all year round childcare fgs. We had to wait years until we earned enough to afford to have a child, and then had to leave an age gap about two years more than we'd have liked before trying for dc2 because we couldn't afford not to work and couldn't afford childcare for 2. Fgs some of these ridicul

Ridiculous posts are really getting on my nerves now.

Hunty this is C&Ped from the HMRC site

Tax credits for babies under one:

The extra amount of Child Tax Credit for having a baby under the age of one is being stopped from 6 April 2011.
This change means if you were getting this payment for the last tax year, you won't get it for the new tax year - even if your child is still under the age of one."

If your DS was born in Jan 2011, does this mean that tax credits might have overpaid you all this time? I sincerely hope not for all your sakes. Hopefully I'm reading it wrongly and this is not the case and that you don't have to factor in the loss of the baby element into your budget.

Four children?? Well that's two more than we could afford , with both of us working too.

So basically Huntycat you have either been overpaid or you've miss read your award letter as there is no way you should still be getting a baby element, well up until yesterday anyway.

Don't know why I thought I was still getting it then? Maybe it went while I was still with my Ex-P when he was working, and I wouldn't have noticed it so much. That means my CTC won't drop by £10 next week, which is because I was wondering exactly WHERE in the budget I could cut another £10.

OH - and FYI, Alouisee - I have figured that I should, theoretically, feel OK about leaving my SN DD at home alone for a few hours in around two years time (which is when I think SHE will be mature enough). She will be 16yo. DS1 will be 12yo, and perfectly able to come home alone. DS2 will be 10yo, in Y5, and able to go to after-school club/holiday club. DS3 will be 3yo then, and eligible for Nursery vouchers to cut the cost of Nursery.

So I am aiming to go back to work in two years time, when my youngest is 3yo, and my life with the SN dc will be significantly easier to manage. It's NOT that I don't WANT to work, it's just currently impossible. So I'm NOT 'squealing' about the Welfare reforms because I 'feel hard done by', or because I am a 'feckless scrounger', but because I want to still have a ROOF over my dc's head in 2 years time when going out to work is much more possible.

I am wondering whether the Op and some others , actually have children of 12 and over.
An 8 hr day + half hour lunch and 3 hours daily commuting adds up to 11.5 hours. No way would i want to leave a minor child of mine at home by them selves from 7.30 in the morning til 7 at night day after day in the school holidays.It's not just a matter of how sensible they are, it is a matter of their need for social interaction.I would go round teh twist at home by myself all day in an isolated area and no access to transport.

winter well as I said DD should have got the baby element up til Sept 2011 but it stopped on the 5th of April 2011....

It did not continue for those babies under one on the 5th of April, it stopped outright.

Like I said, make the Father do the childcare while you work. I'm assuming that if he was great enough to shag he'll be a great Dad?

Hunty why have you continued having children if it's so hard and impossible for you to work?

Callmemrs. I HAVE paid for the entirety of my childcare costs, for FT Nursery, in the past. When I was working in a job that I was earning over the threshold for ANY help with anything. . I was paying a mortgage, insurances, childcare, season ticket to London on the train, car park tickets. . I HAVE been where you are. But now I'm on the other side of the coin. It's only an accident away for anyone, you know.

And, tbh, back then - I very likely would have been of the same opinion as most of you. Because, of course, I had taken all precautions with insurances, built up savings, worked ruddy hard, and it wouldn't happen to me...

Alouise would you want someone looking after your children when they DIDNT want to be there?? Really!!!

You really are something else alouisee

I obviously don't know what's going on here with personal histories etc but could the venom please stop?

Nor do I

Whoa. WTF?

Reality check trying to live on 69 pounds a week as a single person aproximate amount for unemployed or amount a single person is said to need is nearly impossible. Or trying to live on the minimum wage and working full time is the same some of these people who have never had to should try it .If u are on the minimum wage here u need nearly a days wage a week to cover the cost of a bus each day to work and back and thats only to travel three to four miles a day

Hopefully it was overlooked at the time. If my DP had fucked off leaving me with four children and a baby a few months old I might have overlooked it too. It was hard enough when I had to kick useless XH into touch and I only had one baby. Demanding job as well and full-time child-care to pay for which meant I wasn't best placed to check many things.

I had 3 of the children BEFORE my disability was diagnosed, before my DD's disabilities were diagnosed, before my 3rd child's disabilities were diagnosed, when I was the higher earner in my couple, had £20K savings in the bank, and was earning enough to be paying HRT.

Lost it ALL once my epilepsy and my dc's issues were diagnosed though. My lovely life went down the pan, and now I'm just a feckless scrounger.

YES, I have had ONE dc since being worse off - due to my epilepsy meds making my contraception less effective. I don't believe in termination, a life begins at conception,and I can ASSURE you that my MH would suffer had I killed my own child. And at the time I had 1yo DS3, who has the same father as my 8yo DS2, I was in a relationship. OK, my Ex-P earnt a low wage, and we were claiming Tax Credits - but I didn't realise that a condition of claiming Tax Credits might mean killing one of your dc if you accidentally fall pregnant whilst claiming them? I must have missed that piece of legislation?

Don't you think that something like that would be pushing the boundaries of eugenics? While, yes, I AGREE that it was far from ideal, having a baby in that situation, we could cope when my Ex-P was here. I didn't have a fucking crystal ball telling me that he was going to walk out, after 9 years, when DS3 was 4mo, did I??