All you atheist parents wondering how to broach the religion topic to your kids listen up!

[Rhubarb]

I'm a catholic and I teach my kids about all religions. I explain that some people believe different things and some people don't believe at all. I tell them what the Bible says about creation and what science says.

I tell them what my personal beliefs are but I encourage them to make their own minds up. I answer questions with "well this is what I believe but you might think something different".

I take them to Church and they know about the religion we follow, but I do encourage questions as far as I can bearing in mind their young ages.

So what I say to you is this. Don't put a barrier between yourselves and religion when it comes to your kids. Arm them with information and let them make their own minds up. If you push them a certain way, chances are that they'll reject it later on in life. Whereas if you add your support to whatever they decide to believe or not, it will give them the confidence to choose their own paths.

You may be disappointed in their choices but don't try to influence them too strongly one way or the other.

So says me.

UnquietDad I don't often agree with you but can I say this sums up my life so far:

Roman Catholic
A long history spent covering up mistakes and denying guilt.

Various people i know have openly admitted they stay with religion because they are scared of death - or rather, scared that death may be final. I myself have accepted that this is the most likely thing to happen - goodbye life, hello worms

Me too. Infact the thought of meeting some people again in an afterlife is really quite depressing.

IKWYM...imagine - eternity with the in-laws hehehe. That's gotta be hell whchever fluffy cloud you're sat on!

BTW can anyone on this thread add any useful contribution to another thread i did last night? I wondered if anyone had any ideas how to go about not having Santa...ie, does anyone just put all presents under the tree a la my dh family's style, and if so, what do you tell other people - apparently i will be killing the magic of Christmas, and my lo won't thank me for it...anybody?

in-laws I can handle - a few colleagues/former neighbours on the other hand........................

Lol...that's actually too close to home - with the neighbours anyway. I live in a terrace. In 11 years i have not had quiet neighbours. I hate them all

I thought for most kids the magic of xmas is the presents! Sorry if that sounds cynical but sometimes I wonder if they just humour us re. the santa story as a means to an end i.e if I leave a mince pie on the table for santa I will get a big fat present in return.

I sympathise. We had a neigbour from hell. She had a personal grudge against us which lasted 3 years (til she moved).

She must have been an atheist

I have read this thread now and can safely say I agree with every word from unquietdad. We discuss religion a lot in our house and the kids know many of the stories but that is how we see them nice and not so nice stories.

Actually I find much about religion offensive these days as it gets pushed in our faces from Islam to Chrsitianity and appears to have a monopoly on moral codes and its po faced inability to put up with criticism.

Those of you who are prfessing no faith - you have ben saying that you dont ned a religion to have a mornal code.

So how do you formulate a moral code? Whats yours? WHere did you get it? How do you justify it? What do you do if your well thought our moral code clashes with someone elses equally well thought out moral code?

I honestly mean this seriously. Its something I fond hard to understand about people who are stongly a=religious. Why bother with a mornal code, with love, with beauty, with patience and kindnes, with looking out foe anyone else, if there is no ultimate meaning. If we are all just going to be eaten by the worms and vanish, then why not just enjoy yourself for the short time you are here?

crikey harrisey, are you serious? you really only behave nicely because you fear what will happen after you die? you dont just get along with people and behave responsibly and generously and kindly because it feels nice and right and is , in fact, the best way to bump along happily in life?

wow. and people with religion feel sorry for us?

"Why bother with a mornal code, with love, with beauty, with patience and kindnes, with looking out foe anyone else, if there is no ultimate meaning. If we are all just going to be eaten by the worms and vanish, then why not just enjoy yourself for the short time you are here?"

So are you saying you ONLY try to be kind and honest because otherwise you'd go to hell? Is it just the big celestial policeman that keeps you on the straight & narrow? Really? If someone proved there was no God to you would you just go out and steal and murder?
Of course you wouldn't.
All animals display 'moral' attributes - empathy, love and self-sacrifice, co-operation etc etc
It seems to be inbuilt in us, and even more so in humans, which is probably why we are such successful animals. There is a strong evolutionary advantage for us to work with others, to be kind and empathetic (which makes us accepted by our group), and in return we get pleasure and happiness from having friends and loving relationships.
The point is, morals don't come from Gods (what, the god who praises slavery? the one who told Abraham to kill his son as a trick? the one who commits mass murder with his red sea routine?) - we attribute human qualities to our invented Gods.

I also think that for teh non-religious life has MORE meaning, as it is all there is. And it is amazing.

i enjoy myself perfectly well by living a good life, not intentionally hurting other people and bringing up my children outwith any major religious teaching. I don't have to murder or steal things in order to ' have fun'.

I honestly consider myself to be far more moral than some people who profess to be religious.

"Why bother with a mornal code, with love, with beauty, with patience and kindnes, with looking out foe anyone else why not just enjoy yourself"

Harrissey, I think you have a really warped idea of enjoyment. Is a life without love or kindness or empathy really your idea of an enjoyable life? If it is, I think you are a very strange - and not very nice - person.

'
So how do you formulate a moral code? Whats yours? WHere did you get it? How do you justify it? What do you do if your well thought our moral code clashes with someone elses equally well thought out moral code? '

My code is very strongly based on a mutual respect for humanity. It doesn't really differ from the christian moral code 9with some minor exceptions based on which part of Christianity you are looking at- contraception is a good thing fro example, and I am pro choice because I dont feel ythat just because something isnt for me, then its not right for anyone else).

I have an extremely strong moral code actually, far stronger than most people I know- restricitvely strong perhaps. I will not do anything to somebody that will hurt them if it is at all avoidable (the only exception being if my boys needd something- its a sad thing but to get help for diabled kids you need to fight and take a bit).

Ultimately my moral code is based on the fact that I have feelings and so do other people. I know how horrid pain is; why on earth would I wish that on a fellow himan being? Once you have that in place, you have a far stronger staring point than any other imo. because its what you want as an individual,, not what someone else leads you to think is right iyswim.

I always find it interesting when peolpe cite religious morals as being the best- something i come across a lot. Now, I wonder how many of them folow Jainism, for example? An ancient religion where poeple cannot eat, for example, carropts for reasons of morality. They have some wonderful foundations to their beliefs and a kindness that cannot be outdonw, but carrots? (well root veg- and anything with multiple seeds).

Message withdrawn

Even mice feel empathy. And I don't think you find many religious mice.

Interesting really that DS1 is clinically without empathy (and qquite happy without thanks) and very religious indeed

Only kid I know takes a bible camping

(Though had to PMSL when he had all the kids on the campsite park around him whilst he preached at them- although a trifle scared a parent might hit me)

Only thing i could posibly add is that i agree with TranquilaManana and other posts about moral conduct. That is precisely what i would say.

Thanks folks, that really good of you to answer.

I'm not dong anything because I'm afraid of what will hapeen when I die. I do it because I think it is the best way to live, and it is my faith that gives me that impetus to live my life that way.

SHame your moral code goes as low as calling me a 'not very nice person'. Because I wasnt doing that to you.

harissey we didnt all call you that, please remember.

One person does not a theory make.

Harrisey - I don't want to add to your hurt but perhaps your questioning of how others had any moral code at all wasn't all that enlightened?