I agree, Blossom, the doctrine of atonement as found in Christianity is incomprehensible. When it comes to befuddling notions, the atonement is up there with the trinity!
But maybe its enigmatic nature reflects the fact that the Bible is a library of books rather than a book of chapters. Different authors. Different agendas. Trying to extract a consistent, coherent message from the narrative, taken as a whole, is a challenge.
And actually, considering what is written in the canonical Gospels and knowing something of the early history of Christianity, I think there is sufficient material available to moot the possibility that Jesus’ own understanding of his mission didn’t involve dying on a cross for the sins of mankind. (A rather controversial idea, I do realise, but worth considering.)
For example:
Luke 10:25-28
On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?"
"What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?"
He answered: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your</span> <span class="italic">soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, Love your neighbour as yourself.' "
"You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live."
It seems to me that Jesus was much more concerned about a return to the original purity of the Commandments in the OT than setting up a whole new religion around a novel atonement doctrine based on the circumstances of his death. He was instead championing the Jewish idea that if the nation of Israel repented and loved God and man as the Law decreed, a new golden age of a paradise on earth would be ushered in.
Love is what it was all about - a simple message that, unlike the atonement, doesn’t require mental contortions or a variety of philosophical theories to try to make sense of it. Jesus’ God was one who delighted in mercy, not sacrifice (see Matt 9:13, 12:7 and Hosea 6:6).
So I think St Paul muddied the waters by introducing in his writings the idea of Jesus’ death on the cross as a means of bringing about the forgiveness of human sins. I can see that there is an atavistic lure to the sacrifice story - and Pauline Christianity has been an amazingly successful worldwide religion on the back of it – but I don’t personally think it was what Jesus intended.
The concept of the atonement is alluded to, albeit to a lesser extent, in the Gospels. (The men who wrote the Gospels down would have already been exposed to and influenced by Paul’s letters.) Yet I think it is possible to discern in them the original underlying story of Jesus, as it was understood before Paul’s doctrinal additions.