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The Christian Prayer Thread Prays Again...

985 replies

Tuo · 31/01/2015 22:31

Welcome to our new prayer thread as winter turns (not quickly enough for some of us...) to spring 2015. This is a safe and supportive place of prayer, where regulars, occasional visitors and lurkers, committed Christians and those just dipping a toe into the water are all equally welcome. Come and leave a prayer, tell us what's going on in your life, bring your worries, hopes, fears and joys to God, and know that you will be prayed for.

We pray, in particular, for...

... ALittleFaith, especially for her dad, who has been diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease, praying that his medication continues to keep him as well as possible for as long as possible;

... amberlight, for her work raising awareness of the ways in which we can work to make life easier for our autistic friends, and for her to know love and acceptance wherever she goes;

... Anjelica27, as she tries to find ways to support her DS who has been self-harming;

... BlackEyedSusan, for all the many things which she has to juggle in her life as a single parent; in particular, for her DS to get adequate support so that he is less stressed at school; also for her DD and for her mum, and for Operation Flat Tidy;

... BlueTinkerbell, for a problem-free pregnancy with DC4 and a happy outcome;

... CaulkheadUpNorth, who is struggling with MH problems which are affecting her faith, and by extension her job in a church environment; prayer for her access the support she needs, inside and outside the workplace, and for her to find her way back to God, in her own time, if need be;

... ChocolateTeacake, for work and financial worries; and for her health;

... DontstepontheMomeRaths , for her busy life as a single mum, and for the wonderful work she does through her church supporting people going through separation and divorce;

... DutchOma, thanking God for the wonderful support that she provides for so many on here; praying for her relationship with her DD; and continuing to think of her in her life without her beloved Bob;

... FaithLoveandGrace, for her mental health as she undergoes painful, but hopefully helpful, counselling; for her relationship with her DSS; and for her work on her PhD;

... howtoapproachthis, for her health, following her diagnosis with CFS and for her to find support for herself and her DD;

... innerstrength100, for strength, hope and joy in her life as she rebuilds her life following the unexpected break-up of her relationship;

... Kaykat, continuing to pray for her as she goes through the stressful and painful process of divorce; praying, in particular, that she is able to find continue to support her DS through this process; and praying that her ex is able to see how damaging his current behaviour is for his DS so that, in this at least, he is able to change his ways;

... MadHairDay, for her ongoing health issues and for the strength to deal with them;

... MaryBS, in the discernment and selection process for ordination to the priesthood;

... ninetynineonehundred, for her relationship with her DH from whom she is separated but with whom she is still living , praying for healing, trust, love and forgivement for them both;

... Pipbin, following the loss of a desperately-wanted pregnancy, praying for strength, for hope, and for lots of support;

... PositiveAttitude, for her studies, her work situation, and her role within her church; for her and her DH as they consider where their engagement with their faith will take them next; for her mum, who has dementia and her dad who has finally accepted he needs help, but finds it hard to accept it; for her DD1, who has been depressed; and for the whole family;

... RoomForALittleOne, for her health in her new pregnancy;

... QuestionofFaith, thanking God that her DH has found a new job, and praying that this will be the turning-point that he needs to overcome his depression and for them to find ways to rebuild their lives;

... and me, Tuo, for my DD2 who has been self-harming, but seems much happier at the moment - please pray for that to continue.

We pray also for all regular and occasional visitors including: Badvoc, BlessedAssurance, CharlotteCollins, cloutiedumpling, DeladionInch, EilisCitron, Gingercurl, JugglingFromHereToThere, ktef, LollipopViolet, MrsPixieMoo, niminypiminy, PandaG, SEStheBrave, thegreenheartofmanyroundabouts, weegiemum, Zing and for anyone I've forgotten to name-check (don't take it personally, please!). We pray for our muslim sisters over in the tea-room, at a time when many feel afraid in a world which seems suspicious of their faith, praying for peace and understanding between all faiths. And we pray for those who read and pray but don't post, for those who need our prayers but are afraid or too uncertain to post them, and for all those known to us in our own lives who need God's love.

Keep Your people, Lord,
in the arms of Your embrace.
Shelter them under Your wings.
Be their light in darkness.
Be their hope in distress.
Be their calm in anxiety.
Be strength in their weakness.
Be their comfort in pain.
Be their song in the night. Amen

OP posts:
FearfullyAndWonderfullyMade · 12/04/2015 18:36

Thank you Tuo, that will help me pray.
Out doing taxi duty at the moment. Glad to be out of the house but less glad to have eaten three chocolate bars!

DontstepontheMomeRaths · 12/04/2015 18:50

Maybe in Herts school term's different? Mind don't go back until 21st. The Monday is an occasional day.

DontstepontheMomeRaths · 12/04/2015 18:51

*Mine

Dutchoma · 12/04/2015 19:16

BES' don't go back till next week, but my ddd's kids go back on Tuesday. (Bucks)

LifeOfBriony · 12/04/2015 19:55

Thank you Tuo for your kind and thoughtful prayers and for the helpful round-up.

Howo what about The Lion Children's Bible? Or 365 Bible Stories (also published by Lion)? My DD had the 365 stories. Both include clear, child-friendly versions of the stories and illustrations.

Have had an up and down week with H. DS and DD had a good weekend together which did them both some good so thankful for that.

BsshBosh · 12/04/2015 20:06

tuo thanks for the summary :) I'll be praying for blessings and strength for you too regardless of whether there are many stresses in your life or not. Whether in happy, placid or sad space, we all gain strength from God.

ZipadiSoozi · 12/04/2015 20:22

Thank you for the round up TUO it's very helpful, I won't miss anybody out in my prayers now Smile

Quite a busy week ahead, Dad has a carer coming tomorrow to assess his needs, we have Dentists appointments and I have a meeting with the Doctors to see where I go from here (re my Diagnosis of Ménière's Disease) not that there is anything that can be done, it is only Stage 1 at the moment so I can hold onto my driving and working for a while yet.

Anyway I pray you all have a lovely week, we still have children off school for another week, hope to get out in the caravan on Thursday for a few days.

Love and Prayers to you all
Soozi xxxx

littlehouseinthebigwoods · 12/04/2015 22:34

Hello everyone. I'm sorry to crash the thread without reading. I was going to post in relationships as I'm really struggling in my marriage. But then I thought I still believe in miracles and I didn't want to hear a chorus of ltb.. My husband and I are both committed Christians, but we have always struggled as he is quite a perfectionist and I am much more, er, relaxed. Based on what I've learned on Mumsnet he's been emotionally abusive but I've always prayed and tried to keep strong and faithful. It is harder now though as I have 2 children and am so sleep deprived, but I try really hard to keep everything as he would like it. Yet I feel that he only ever points out things I've missed, and doesn't respect or appreciate me.

It all came to a head tonight when I was bathing the children and he got really mad about how I hadn't tidied up a magazine properly, one he had left on the floor himself. He reduced me to floods of tears in front of my children, and later when they were in bed I told him if he can't summon up some kindness or respect for me not to bother coming back from work tomorrow...

We moved house 6 months ago which has been great in many wats but I used to have a community of friends in my old church who really supported me. The void without them is immense. I don't have any prayers for my marriage left. If one of you could encourage me or pray for me I'd be so grateful..

SESthebrave · 12/04/2015 22:35

Thank you for your wonderful roundup TUO Flowers

I was meant to have an 8.30am meeting with my boss tomorrow but he messaged my today (yes Sunday lunchtime) to say he had another meeting to be at and so could we catch up on the phone. I already have another meeting scheduled with him Tues afternoon so replied I was happy to speak over the phone tomorrow but would like to speak in more detail on Tues.
Somehow I need to be constructive and honest with him about how he is making me feel. I have decided for the short term to continue in role and if he chooses to take me through a performance management process then so be it.
Having said that, I do still feel that mid/long term, God wants my career to take a back seat in favour of supporting the DC more. So prayers for the long term as well as Tuesday would be appreciated.

Prayers for all you lovely ladies and thanks for the support this group gives.

SESthebrave · 12/04/2015 22:38

littlehouseinthebigwoods - praying....
That sounds an awful thing for you to go through today.
Has he ever acknowledged how his behaviour makes you feel. I'm sorry but it does sound abusive to me but I also applaud what sounds like your desire for things to work out.
Praying for comfort, clarity and wisdom for you

littlehouseinthebigwoods · 13/04/2015 06:59

Thank you SES it really helped last night going to sleep knowing there was a prayer for me somewhere out there.

He does occasionally seem to understand how I feel but then sometimes like yesterday it's like a switch is flicked and it seems to all come out without any control. There's no talking to him when he's like that.

We've been doing really well since January. Before that there was a rough patch and I sent him some links to websites about verbal abuse and constant criticism which seemed to have an impact at the time...

Anyway, sorry I'll read the rest of the thread later so I can contribute. I did see when skimming through yesterday that a couple of you are praying about self harming children. As a teen I self harmed but was dramatically healed when a lady of never met before prayed for me. So I'll definitely be praying for your children to experience that same healing.

FearfullyAndWonderfullyMade · 13/04/2015 07:15

little praying for you.
Sorry to dash in and leave but I have a really busy day today. I'm not feeling well thanks to stomach cramps.

Dutchoma · 13/04/2015 07:22

SES well done for speaking to your boss in a positive way. Can I suggest that you keep the telephone conversation short and insist on making notes during Tuesday's meeting. And play it back to HR and away from him if he wants to go to some disciplinary process. He has a nerve to ring you on a Sundday, that is surely not good practice.

Littlehouse, you already know his behaviour is abusive: the perfectionism, the isolating you from your friends, the lack of help in lookinng after your children (they are his children too, he should take 50% of their care, right? yeah right!), 'going mad' over a magazine you should have tidied when he left it, all these are the classic 'red flags' that the ltb brigade is so fond of.
How did he react to your statement that he'd better not come home from work tonight? If the experience I have gained from MN is anything to go by he will just come home as usual, behave a little better and soon revert to type again.
If so, you will have to think about leaving, I'm afraid. Not so much for your sake as for the sake of the children, who from the sound of it are still small enough to need supervision at bath time. They have a daddy who does not involve himself in their care and a mummy who is totally drained and worn out. You all deserve better.
In the meantime is it possible to have some real life support, even if it means speakiing to one of your old church friends on the phone or on FB?

Don't worry at all about jumping into the prayer board without much energy for all the worries that go around here, it's a good place to come.

Inner, how are you doing? I wrote a similar email to TUO on your behalf and then thought better of it. But I totally agree with her that that is the way to go. You had come so far and although it is a setback you will not have fallen in as deep a despair as you were when it first happened. You did very well the first time and you will do it again. Get him out of your life, nobody should have this kind of power over another person like he has on you.

KayKat · 13/04/2015 07:29

Welcome littlehouse and I'm sorry for what you are going through. A few of us on this thread also have experience of emotionally abusive husbands, myself included, and ultimately separated or divorced as sadly it is very rare that they change their behaviour long term.

The words emotional abuse and committed Christian don't really go together do they. Do you think he's putting on a facade for the rest of the world? Did anyone at your old church challenge him on his behaviour? It sounds like you are experiencing the cycle of abuse, when he thinks you may have had enough he is nice for a while but it doesn't last. Well done for being brave and telling him not to bother coming home, even if he doesn't take it seriously, at least you are getting stronger and detaching a bit. My own DS witnessed my XH reducing me to tears many times and I do regret leaving it so long to separate as now I worry he will grow up to treat women the same way but I really hope I got out soon enough to show him a different way. It takes a long time to get to that point as you keep hoping they will change and want to give them every chance, I put up with it for years and only seperated when he had an affair.

I'm not surprised you have no energy left to pray for your marriage so pray for yourself and your DC instead. I will pray for you to find some support in your new area and for you to know the best path ahead whatever that may be.

KayKat · 13/04/2015 07:39

Inner he hurt you so badly and it's been lovely to see you happy again and enjoying a new and probably healthier relationship. Didn't he give a strong indication that he had found someone new? Now it's probably gone wrong with her he contacts you and tells you he's had a breakdown. Don't let him ruin your happiness again.

QofF · 13/04/2015 07:51

Bssh welcome and praying for your scan results today. I am glad you found this thread and hope we can be a supportive presence to you.
Littlehouse good advice already from others. Definitely agree that he sounds abusive. Will be praying for you.
Inner am so sorry that wound has been ripped open again when you were doing so well. Before the contact how were you feeling about him? Because that is how you will get back to being again and it will never take as much time and pain to get there as it did the first time.
tuo thanks so much for the roundup. I don't know how you do it so well but I am very glad you do!

littlehouseinthebigwoods · 13/04/2015 09:25

Thank you so much for all your kind responses. They have given me a lot to think about.

dutchoma after I told him not to bother coming home I pretty much legged it and business myself with getting the kids into bed etc. Then I hid downstairs until he was asleep! It's the children that concern me. I put up with it for years before they were born, now I don't want my ds thinking that this is how you treat your wife, or my dd thinking this is an acceptable way to be treated.

I have only ever admitted any of this to one person irl as she asked me how I was at a difficult moment and it all came out. She told me it was abuse which was news to me (I'd done the power of a praying wife etc and just thought as long as I focused on changing myself things would improve). Then I came on mumsnet and read some of the threads on relationships and my eyes were opened! But still I felt I had more of a chance because I'm a Christian...

kaykat I'm sorry you went through such a difficult time. What you said about emotional abuse/committed Christian made me think. Throughout our marriage DH has had real struggles in his faith and for many years hasn't been to church at all. My last church was a real support network to me because I was there on my own with the kids, but not knowing the full story. Now we have moved we started a new church as a family, and for the first time in years DH has been positive about church and his faith. I can see that this morning he was listening to worship songs on his iPad before he left for work. Which makes me think maybe I have a final chance for change? But it has to come from him, I don't have the energy for it..

AnywAy even talking about it on here feels like a betrayal, which is why I never talk about it irl. The good part is we now live very close to my parents, and my dad has said things to me which implies that he knows. So I know I could talk to them. But not yet while I still feel there is hope.

Sorry for writing so much. Thank you for the safe place. Xx

Dutchoma · 13/04/2015 10:42

Are you thinking of it as a betrayal because you have been conditioned to think of it as such? Some churches are very keen on the 'submitting wife' in Ephesians 5 without checking what it is that he wife is supposed to submit to. This is total committed sacrificial love from the husband, but it is easily missed by men who like to see their wives as doormats. They are supposed to be the head of the household so bully for them. What St Paul actually writes is very far from that. Do check it out.
Could it be a good idea to talk to your dad now, just to get a bit of support in what you are doing, either staying or leaving? It sounds to me as if you need all the help you can get.
Your parents may also be able to look after the children for a while so you can get some rest. How do they get on with your husband?

Anjelica27 · 13/04/2015 11:10

Thank you Tuo.

Thinking of you today Bssh.

Hello Little.

Ds is still without any support, I'm about to phone Camhs and try and get someone to see him soon (assuming he will go). He is in a very dark place at the moment but hasn't cut himself for about two weeks, for which I thank God.

I've been reading Dutchoma's wise words over Easter about my struggles with prayer and taking comfort from those. Even if it is hard at the moment God knows what it is I'm trying to say and knows what is best for ds. My biggest struggle though is understanding how this dreadful time can be part of any plan - I've always tried to a good person - this feels like a punishment - and ds is a child, he doesn't deserve this.

Ds knows I love him and I'm here, whatever he needs to say or wants me to do but apart from that I don't know what to do. I'm his mum and I can't accept that I can't fix this.

Sorry to ramble on.

Dutchoma · 13/04/2015 11:44

" I'm his mum and I can't accept that I can't fix this."

I think this is the hardest thing for any parent to do. I know I struggle(d) with this massively.

And yet is is part of parenting that you manage to let go. This is your son's life, he is a young adult in his own right. And I am wondering whether this isn't the biggest problem: that he is striving for independence and you are striving to 'fix' it.

What would happen if you stopped 'trying to get help for him' wondering whether he will accept it or not? If you told him that you are stopping all help until he actually asks you for it? Would you feel as if you had totally failed him or would you give him the freedom to deal with his own life in his own way? I just don't know, of course I don't, but maybe you could work out in your own mind what is going on here and whether you might both feel liberated by this course of action.

thegreatestMadHairDayinhistory · 13/04/2015 11:54

Just popping in and read through. I've been away then not so well. TUO your round up is once again so wonderful. Thank you.

Praying especially for Bssh, Littlehouse, innerstrength, anjelica and SEE right now. Will try and get on more later when on laptop. Love and peace to you all

Anjelica27 · 13/04/2015 12:08

Thank you Dutchoma, I wish I had someone like you in rl to give me a kick up the backside!!! That was difficult to read but I think you might be right. There is just me and ds and it is difficult to step back and accept that, like you said, he is a young adult. Doesn't mean I love him any less. Lots to think about and a different way of looking at things - like I said hard to read but something I needed to hear. As always, very wise advice. I suspect that I might need to get myself some help with this. Thank you so much.

BsshBosh · 13/04/2015 16:05

Thank you all so much for your prayers. My CT scan results were good - shrinkage of all tumours. I'm still incurable it this good news means I can remain on current chemo and it means my treatment options are not running out :)

I'm currently reading James Martin's The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything: A Spirituality for Real Life. It's an amazing book and really helping me with my faith. I highly recommend it.

BsshBosh · 13/04/2015 16:06

Oh yes, and my mouth is healing up. I was able to eat much more and more variety today so again thank you for your prayers. (Though even if I didn't have such good news I would still be thanking you!)

BsshBosh · 13/04/2015 16:09

Prayers for you all today x