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Original poster

How do you resolve conflicting religious parenting

332 replies

Contemplates · 23/03/2014 14:32

My husband doesn't want our children to be allowed access to both of our (differing) religious views, only his.

He is atheistic and I wanted to introduce our preschooler to Sunday school if he wanted to try it.

He loves preschool and wanted to see what this was all about too, and I had always been open about the fact I intended to encourage exploring God as an alternative to atheism, without forcing anything.

Obviously his Dad's alternative viewpoint is also and equally well known in our household. However I don't silence my husband the way I feel he is trying to silence me and I'm trying to remain balanced and fair.

This morning he was saying how he didn't want our son to attend Sunday school as he doesn't like it; which led to our son saying he didn't want to go anymore. So this morning we went to the park instead Hmm

Has anyone experienced this parental conflict before and how did you deal with it? There must be some balanced compromise that we can reach, while still enabling our children freedom to make their own choices.

OP posts:
capsium · 27/03/2014 20:51

Hully pain works as a warning signal, from our bodies, something is wrong.

Hullygully · 27/03/2014 21:07

So you can say to your torturer, "Hey that electrifying there is a bit painful, my body is warning me it might damage me." And they'll stop and apologise?

capsium · 27/03/2014 21:11

Hully ? Confused

Well, the situation you describe is wrong, hardly right is it...

Hullygully · 27/03/2014 21:47

And it is incompatible with an omnibenevolent deity, isn't it?

capsium · 27/03/2014 21:53

No, evil causes evil, not God.

God gave us free will. He works through people. Free will means people can exercise their choice to do bad.

headinhands · 27/03/2014 21:56

Does god have free will?

capsium · 27/03/2014 22:05

Yes, but He doesn't go against His word.

headinhands · 27/03/2014 22:22

His word? What's that?

headinhands · 27/03/2014 22:23

So he could if he wanted to?

capsium · 27/03/2014 22:33

Come on head you know all this...

It's the same conversation you must have had countless times over many threads.

Ultimately all I can say is you either believe the Bible or you don't and this is a choice.

You have told me before you don't believe and why - no evidence, my words will not give you the evidence you require to believe. You pointing out lack of evidence will not shake my belief, since I believe and do so in Faith - so where does that leave us?

capsium · 27/03/2014 22:51

And you still have not told me what you think about the 'talking' plants...

headinhands · 27/03/2014 22:51

I was just pointing out logical flaws in your reasoning. Sorry.

capsium · 27/03/2014 22:54

You should know me better than that by now head. I don't care about logical arguments...Grin

BackOnlyBriefly · 27/03/2014 22:58

God gave us free will. He works through people

If he works through people does that mean he causes them to do things? If so then they don't have free will.

Hullygully · 27/03/2014 23:01

I don't care about logical arguments

I wish you'd said that at the beginning. I wouldn't have bothered. How dull and predictable.

capsium · 27/03/2014 23:04

They do Back It is conscious choice to chose to repent and accept Christ. Christ sets a person free and a Redeems them.

To do the opposite, is to be deceived by Satan and ultimately become a 'slave to sin'.

capsium · 27/03/2014 23:05

Hully didn't you notice?

BackOnlyBriefly · 27/03/2014 23:20

capsium What I meant was that people often claim god 'works through people'. They suggest that when you are down or need help god will send someone to knock on your door to cheer you up. Or god will send someone who is worse off than you to freeze to death on your doorstep so that you realise you are not so badly off as you thought.

But if god 'sends' them then they are puppets being remote controlled.

capsium · 28/03/2014 07:42

Back There is conscious choice, with each decision.

A Christian might feel uncomfortable doing the wrong thing, but they still can do the wrong thing, Redemption is worked out, from the renewed Spirit, the nature is changed upon Salvation but it can take a while to change old habits.

Just as a person with other beliefs, or no religious beliefs has a conscience. But the conscience can be 'set' wrong. People can have false guilt for example or people can feel no guilt, when they should.

capsium · 28/03/2014 07:44

I believe following Christ gives an opportunity to reset the old conscience, through relationship with Christ.

capsium · 28/03/2014 07:46

So not puppets....more like someone emulating what they love in Christ.

atthestrokeoftwelve · 28/03/2014 07:49

"Just as a person with other beliefs, or no religious beliefs has a conscience. But the conscience can be 'set' wrong. "

So christians have a more accurately attuned moral compass that the rest of us?

atthestrokeoftwelve · 28/03/2014 07:51

"People can have false guilt for example or people can feel no guilt, when they should." - equally christians are made to feel sinful and guilty when they shouldn't. Like sex outside marriage for instance.

Original poster
Contemplates · 28/03/2014 07:57

Haven't read all the most recent pots but the last one, backonlybriefly begs for a quick reply.

When I worked in a busy hospital unit, I managed around 45 staff. Of those 45 I knew who was the most reliable and who would act in such a way as to be commensurate with their chosen profession. It was these people I could trust with important tasks. Why would I ask someone who is poorly trained or chooses to short-cut ineffectively, or worse not comply at all?

And so it is of God. If he were to "call" - ask - one of his team to complete a task (I dislike the term "called" because it smacks a little of religious terminology which I resist!), then it stands to reason He will likely assign someone faithful who will do a good job. An effective worker, if you like.

But who is to say that He wouldn't have asked a few other people first, people who refused to do what God wanted? It stands to reason that could be the case, as I know I saw that happen in the hospital I worked for so long. Sometimes giving someone a bigger task than they'd chose is a good way for them to increase their skills, but it can take a good few goes before it can be reliable!

Someone once said to me that you should use daily logic when you're reasoning something out. And I think it you apply logic to your comment up may see it is reasonable that God's people are no more puppets than good, reliable, hospital staff.

OP posts:
thegreenheartofmanyroundabouts · 28/03/2014 08:06

Another quick reply!

Secularists whether they be humanists or atheists have to work harder to find a basis for ethics than those of faith. It doesn't mean that they can't be ethical but they need to look to social contract theories of ethical reasoning and in an individualistic society that isn't easy. If everyone is finding meaning in their lives through different paths then working out why I shouldn't have your stuff or hurt you if you get in my way to obtaining meaning and satisfaction in my life is harder. Not impossible but harder.