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Original poster

Not enjoying dog ownership when to call it a day ?

161 replies

MillyMollyMoo · 03/11/2009 13:15

Long story short, did a bit of research into what dog to get as I cannot stand hair, so thought we were buying a labradoddle.
Turns out he's all Lab and no Doddle, there are fine blonde hairs everywhere, could be worse but I hate it.
Combined with the fact that the kids begged for him and now ignore him, he chases the cats around the house and jumps fences to shit in next doors garden all in all I've had enough.
Is this going to get better or do I rehome him whilst he still has the cute little dog factor ?

OP posts:
sandcastles · 06/11/2009 11:41

It doesn't make me feel good to condemn her, actually!

But she makes me angry! Yet another dog condemned to a already over run rehoming centre for heaven knows how long!

thesunshinesbrightly · 06/11/2009 11:45

I agree with SANDCASTLES, this is not about the OP it is about the dog, that has gone to a home where he is not wanted and now has to go through - going into a kennel and waiting for his time when some one takes a glance his way.

Stayingsunnygirl · 06/11/2009 11:46

Didn't someone say earlier on on this thread that the Labradoodle Trust leave the dog in the current home, if possible, until it is rehomed, or was that one of the other rehoming trusts? Not having a go, btw, just asking.

thesunshinesbrightly · 06/11/2009 11:47

It doesnt make me feel good at all, i am concerned about her dog and that is it.

sandcastles · 06/11/2009 11:48

Actually sunny, I would empathise too if she came on here, saying that she had done all the research, tried to cope with the hair, tried to cope by grooming him, washing him, training him not to jump fences, played with him etc & she had tried to make it work (well past the puppy stage) then yes, empathy from me!

But she didn't! She comes on saying she hates him, blames him for doing what a dog does, blames the breeder for miss-selling her a moulty dog, blames him for needing more walking than she can offer, yet it home with him all day!

Oh & then to top it all, calls us all a bunch of cunts! Nice!

Lulumama · 06/11/2009 11:48

as an aside, it still baffles me that people get dogs without really thinking through the potential 10 - 20 odd years of care that goes into it.. surely it is not a surprise it takes effort, work, money, time and that children get bored of them !!!

thesunshinesbrightly · 06/11/2009 11:51

exactly sandcastles

jeee · 06/11/2009 11:51

I am often told that I'm being selfish by refusing point blank to get a pet. My view is that even goldfish need to be cared for properly, and should not be brought into the house on a whim. But to a lot of people this makes me a BAD mother.

TeaFan · 06/11/2009 11:52

I admit that I have not read this entire thread so apologies if I am repeating what others have said.. but this dog is not an inanimate object [anger], to take back, change your mind about, exchange or sell on! My goodness, what would you have done if you realised you weren't cut out for parenthood?!?!

This dog will have formed an attachment to you and your family, he is part of your 'pack'. You made a commitment and have a responsibility to care for him to the best of your ability until the end of his days. If you really aren't able to do this then re-home him responsibly, frankly he deserves better and afterall, people give up their children for adoption every day

But please learn your lesson and never ever take another animal into your household again. I feel sorry for you MillyMollyMoo because you will never know the true reward that comes with caring for a dog through good times and bad. He sounds like a lovely boy and if you were willing to put your own feelings aside for a while and just carry out your duty you would probably get through these teething issues. You would be able to train him and teach your children about responsibility, duty and selflessness at the same time as gaining the loyalty and friendship of the best friend you will ever have.

Please think this through and make a decision that you can stick to forever.

thesunshinesbrightly · 06/11/2009 11:53

jeee that is totally wrong, fair play to you, for realising you cant give any animal the care and time etc... you have to have.

sandcastles · 06/11/2009 11:56

And I hope that in this case, the trust won't leave the dog placed where he is until (if) they find him a new home.

He isn't wanted, regardless of how well is he currently treated it will be horrible for him to stay where he isn't loved.

And FWIW, I do agree that she is doing what is best...but it would've been better to really think before getting a dog. Not just getting a breed that allegedly doesn't moult...but really thinking 'what can we offer it'.

It goes without saying that many kids will ignore a dog after a honeymoon period. Kids get bored with their toys, so it stands to reason that they would a dog too! You shouldn't buy animals because your kids want one!

sandcastles · 06/11/2009 12:05

jeee, I don't think you are selfish at all! Nor a bad mother! Good call!

We have a dog (mad border collie) 2 guinea pigs, fish & 2 snails.

I will admit that dh & dd do the lions share of the work, cleaning cages etc...but I walk the dog during the day, play with him in the garden & groom him with dd2 (which is funny, being 16mths she brushes everything except the dog). We are teaching her young the responsibility to look after pets.

Dd wants a rabbit....but not until we have fewer animals than we do now. We have time for them all, adding more to the mix would stretch us.

jeee · 06/11/2009 12:08

I don't think I am being selfish - just I have had at least 10 people say it to me. I love dogs (although find all other animals a bit boring TBH), so long as I don't have the responsibility for them. Thanks for saying I'm not selfish though. It's nice to know not everyone thinks I'm evil.

WynkenBlynkenandNod · 06/11/2009 12:09

Whatever the rights and wrongs of this, I think MillyMollyMoo you need to do what you can to make the remaining time he is with you bearable for all of you if it is going to be more than a day or two.

Can you get a dogwalker to take him out once a day for the moment on top of the walk you do ? Also, my labradoodle (well nearly) has had a fantastic time with one of those balls you put treats in then they roll them around and work out how to get the treats out, have you got anything like that ? If not they are fab and will keep him busy. Do you know anyone else with another dog maybe who would be happy to walk him and let him have a good old romp somewhere ?

Stayingsunnygirl · 06/11/2009 12:14

I'm beginning to think I must be really stupid, because despite all the thought and research we put into having a dog, and despite asking dh loads of questions about the practicalities of having a dog, I still wasn't able to forsee how much work was involved.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 06/11/2009 12:16

Its like thinking you are all knowledgable about babies before you have any. You can never know what to expect.

WynkenBlynkenandNod · 06/11/2009 12:21

I have to say, despite knowing how hard it would be the first two weeks of dog ownership were a bit of a shock. I think Ferret is right about the baby bit.

I'm now rather dreading the teenage years which my dog is gearing up to but am working with her every day on various things, going to classes and just hope that the work I'm putting in pays off in the long term.

sandcastles · 06/11/2009 12:38

Oh I don't think anyone can foresee the work involved with babies, or dogs or any pet for that matter....the difference is, all those who have dogs on this thread, WANTED said dog. OP didn't.

All those with dogs probably got them because THEY wanted them, OP didn't want a dog, she was talked into it by her kids.

All those who have dogs, persevere..train, groom, wash, play, walk, love etc,. beyond 6 months.

See the difference? There is not knowing & giving up and there is not knowing & persevering because you made a choice.

There is also not knowing, not trying to find out before hand & giving up too!

Vallhala · 06/11/2009 13:00

I wondered why MMMs post had been deleted - I now gather its because she called us all a bunch of cunts.

Well thanks a lot.

I offered advice. I din't judge, I didn't slate you. I've kept my opinions to myself.

And people wonder why I prefer dogs to humans....

BellaBonJovi · 06/11/2009 13:10

Wow - you've all been busy while I was out walking my dogs

No point flaming the OP - she made a mistake and is trying to do the right thing for the dog now.

Instead we should make sure anyone who asks about getting a dog gets all the information we can give them.

I paint as black a picture as possible - then, if the OP still wants a dog, you know they are mad keen.

seaglass · 06/11/2009 13:45

I've read all of this with a real sinking heart feeling.
I know so many people who have got a dog without doing any research, and it nearly always backfires on them, and my sympathy is entirely with the dog, not the owner.
Labradoodles may look lovely, may have a slight chance of being non-shedding, but when all's said and done, they are a cross breed, there is no prior knowledge as to which characteristics a particular puppy will take on, they are big dogs, and, in my experience, take an awful lot of work to keep and train - they behave like puppies til they are 3.
If anyone is considering getting any dog, they owe it to the dog and themselves to do a lot of research into it. Dogs are not disposable.
MMM with a bit of research and talking to dog owners, you would probably never have got a dog in the first place. Let's hope you dog finds a lovely new home where he will be loved and appreciated.

LabradoodleTrust · 06/11/2009 13:55

Sorry MillyMollyMoo. I can't message you as you have the facility turned off so I'm going to have to post here.
If you would like to contact me we can get your dog into one of our foster homes this weekend. You can email me on [email protected]
Thank you,
Barbara Turnbull (Labradoodle Trust Rescue Coordination Manager)

Stayingsunnygirl · 06/11/2009 13:58

Wow!

I hope this dog has a long and happy life in a new family. Well done the Labradoodle Trust.

ScattyKatty · 06/11/2009 14:17

God this thread made me cry That poor dog! My PIL's have a dog that sheds like noone business but they do not speak about him the way MMM did.

Clearly didn't think it through, and from the sounds of it is a nasty, agressive human being! Lucky escape doggy!

Vallhala · 06/11/2009 14:26

Bumping to keep the most important message on top:

QUOTE:

"Sorry MillyMollyMoo. I can't message you as you have the facility turned off so I'm going to have to post here.
If you would like to contact me we can get your dog into one of our foster homes this weekend. You can email me on [email protected]
Thank you,
Barbara Turnbull (Labradoodle Trust Rescue Coordination Manager)"