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Original poster

Puppy regret

69 replies

emzypo79 · 12/12/2022 19:10

Hi please be kind because im very emotional at present..my husband and children have always wanted a dog, me not so much but have agreed on this occasion, im now thinking ive made the biggest mistake of my life. She has been with us for just over a week, shes a 10 weeks old cavapoochon and all i've done is cry uncrontrollably since bringing her home..i dont know what to do.

OP posts:
kenadams86 · 12/12/2022 19:15

It's called "puppy blues" it's a real thing.

I was the same with my puppy. I personally think having a puppy is harder than having a baby. But it gets easier. Just keep training her and make sure she gets regular sleep and doesn't get too over stimulated. Crate training is a good idea too but not for everyone.

If you persevere and take training seriously you will end up with a very lovely dog.
It won't take long to fall in love and before you know it you won't remember life without her x

kenadams86 · 12/12/2022 19:15

Also if your husband wanted her, he should be the one who takes on most of the responsibility

SavingKitten · 12/12/2022 19:16

What is it that’s making you so upset about it?

Sprouttreesareamazing · 12/12/2022 19:18

Yabu to give your mongrel a posh name.
Every single ddog owner has regrets! Sometimes for the entirety of the ddog's life!

RambamThankyouMam · 12/12/2022 19:18

Dogs are a pain in the arse. More work than children! Rehome.

Thatweredeadtightoncheryl · 12/12/2022 19:27

I promise it gets better, I was properly depressed after we got our much longed for Doodle. Our lives revolved around her, her routines, her bowel movements, my house didn't feel like my home for a while which was weird.
I felt suffocated because I WFH she bonded with me and followed me everywhere, properly obsessed.
We're a year and a half in, there are days when I can't deal with her clingy and very needy behaviour (very typical of spaniels and poodles) but I literally love her like my third child. She lights up my life and I couldn't be without her, literally my wee furry best friend.
Persevere, I promise it gets easier!!!!!

AlwaysGinPlease · 12/12/2022 19:27

@RambamThankyouMam why are you so horrible?

USaYwHatNow · 12/12/2022 19:29

Hmmm we thought my brother had puppy blues, turned out the responsibility hadn't just made him 'blue' but full on depressed, and for his mental health he and his partner made the very tough and sad decision to take the puppy back to the breeder. Talk to your husband and be honest about how you're feeling.

STEMum · 12/12/2022 19:31

Thatweredeadtightoncheryl · 12/12/2022 19:27

I promise it gets better, I was properly depressed after we got our much longed for Doodle. Our lives revolved around her, her routines, her bowel movements, my house didn't feel like my home for a while which was weird.
I felt suffocated because I WFH she bonded with me and followed me everywhere, properly obsessed.
We're a year and a half in, there are days when I can't deal with her clingy and very needy behaviour (very typical of spaniels and poodles) but I literally love her like my third child. She lights up my life and I couldn't be without her, literally my wee furry best friend.
Persevere, I promise it gets easier!!!!!

This exactly. I cried daily when we got our puppy. It seemed like such a huge responsibility all of a sudden. It was hard work. Our home smelt weird. The BITING! But now I genuinely worry about the fact we will never be able to replace this wonderful dog we have now. He is still infuriating on occasion, but he is also the best at cuddles, loving us, and always being happy to see me!

AlwaysLatte · 12/12/2022 19:34

Oh please hang in there. It's a big shock, having a puppy - not far off having a baby except they don't stay where you put them and they eat everything they shouldn't if you're not careful! You need a routine, use a puppy pen so that you can still do things you need to do, lots and lots of trips outside for wees and good rewards (tiny cubes of cheese or thin sliced cocktail sausages). You just need to get used to their rhythm so you you can pre-empt what's needed and it will be a whole lot easier!

nuttymut · 12/12/2022 19:35

It’s the puppy blues . She’s unsettled . She’s come from her mum and siblings into a new home. Is she crate trained ? Which helps as she’s got somewhere to nap , that’s important especially in a busy household . Start some training , either classes or one to one . Or online . There’s loads on YouTube . Training will engage her and tire her out . Also get husband and kids involved, so that you’re all doing the same thing.
mu pups 9 months old and when he was about 10 weeks old , I joined some facebook groups for puppy owners which really helped as I realised it wasn’t just me .
yes it’s hard but it does get better. And she’ll be an amazing and loyal friend and family member ☘️

Quveas · 12/12/2022 19:38

Sprouttreesareamazing · 12/12/2022 19:18

Yabu to give your mongrel a posh name.
Every single ddog owner has regrets! Sometimes for the entirety of the ddog's life!

Every single ddog owner did not have regrets. Don't be ridiculous. I've been with dogs for 65 years, and the only reason I've no regrets is because there's always been at least one ddog.

OP, people sometimes don't appreciate the responsibilities they take on. If you think about it, I'll bet you can find a time you have thought the same about your OH and the DC.

You have a baby here, and your OH and children need to step up because they wanted this. But you can take part too. This new creature is part of your family. There will be ups and downs, but that is family life.

One tip to help, but it's going to sound really stupid. But stupid as it sounds, it's science. When you get a chance, sit with puppy and look into their eyes. Doing that creates the same bonding cycle between humans and dogs that creates the bond between pants and their child. It will release, in both you and puppy, the feel good and protective reactions that create positive family bonds.

fufulina · 12/12/2022 19:38

I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say that our puppy very nearly pushed me over the edge. He tipped me into a full blown crisis. I couldn’t believe what we’d taken on. And we were fully prepped. Two years later - I honestly wouldn’t be without him, and I think it was about a year of having him that things started to improve. Keep training, he will get there. Our dog is lovely now. To be honest - he always was I just couldn’t bear the responsibility.

AlwaysLatte · 12/12/2022 19:38

Yabu to give your mongrel a posh name.
I don't think yours is a helpful comment, as it says in one word the different breeds, which is very helpful in lots of ways. Also, the OP is asking for help, not derision.

AlwaysLatte · 12/12/2022 19:40

Dogs are a pain in the arse. More work than children! Rehome.
Nasty reply, @RambamThankyouMam

noideabutstilltrying · 12/12/2022 19:40

When I got both my girls as puppies I thought I'd make an error.

I just had to adjust to having a puppy again rather than a calm adult dog.

My yellow one is now 11 and my black lab is nearly 8 and I can't imagine home without them.

The first week is hard as puppy has no routine and needs to settle

Original poster
emzypo79 · 12/12/2022 19:40

Shes crate trained during the night but uses a puppy bed during day. I try n do little bits of training in the day. And i have a puppy class booked for january.

OP posts:
AlwaysLatte · 12/12/2022 19:41

The puppy class will help a lot, and you can share experiences with others. X

Original poster
emzypo79 · 12/12/2022 19:42

How long do puppy blues last?x

OP posts:
Kanaloa · 12/12/2022 19:43

I mean you didn’t want a dog. Now that you’ve got a dog you’re not very happy. All a bit obvious really. Dogs are hard work even when you desperately wanted one.

This is why I generally think that if one person of the family is even lukewarm it should be ‘no pets.’

Kanaloa · 12/12/2022 19:44

But if your husband and kids have always wanted a dog then maybe let them take over as much responsibility as possible for the dog. Had your husband always wanted to clean up dog mess? And attend training classes? Hopefully he’s doing all that.

Original poster
emzypo79 · 12/12/2022 19:46

Ive tried,in one ear n out the other.x

OP posts:
PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 12/12/2022 19:47

Having a well-trained adult dog is a very different experience from having a new puppy - and that's what you will eventually have if you persevere with the training.

Passtheturkey · 12/12/2022 19:47

My 10month old doodle is currently asleep on my lap and much loved but I could have written your post when he was younger. The puppy stage is really tough - they can be annoying little buggers but I found it got much easier as he got a bit older not that he’s a saint (yet).

On a practical level my DH and I both took it in turns to have a break away from him which really helped. Also getting him out more as it limited his time destroying the house.

DominoRules · 12/12/2022 19:52

I had horrid puppy blues for about 3 weeks then it subsided, by the time he was 16 weeks I was totally in love! I honestly found the puppy harder than either of my DC