Puppy and a baby?

[gsjd8]

Hi everyone, new to posting on here although I have read many threads already so I know I am touching on an “already covered” subject!!
I would love to hear views from both sides, is this really such a crazy thing to consider? So a little about us, I have a 7 year so he’s at school. I also have a 5 month old and yes we are considering bringing a puppy into our household. Specifically a Labrador!
I have done what feels like endless research into this although I fully appreciate you never do quite know what it’s like until you’re in the thick of it, up to your ears in poo / wee / chewing and so on, but I still find myself wanting to do it. I realise it will be hard work!
My parents have had dogs over the years and I have played a role in helping (although again I appreciate helping and being ultimately responsible are totally different).
I have researched the breed and the initial stages. we would crate train from day one. Hubby would take 2 weeks off work when we bring pup home. He is also in a position (once pup is ready) to take him/her into work, not everyday but certainly a couple of days a week.
We will book into puppy training classes and have already looked into this. I fully appreciate the first few months will be mayhem but is it still advisable to wait?
Time wise I feel is never going to be perfect but as my little one is not yet on the move I feel we could get the initial toilet training under control first? Also by the time she is walking I would hope the puppy will be starting to settle so not so bouncy?
Would love to hear both sides, has anyone managed it?
Thanks in advance x

I would get this thread moved to the doghouse section as you are more likely to get responses as it's busier.

You will have two babies, and then two toddlers.

After the two weeks your husband is off what would happen to the puppy? Who would be with them in the day. Labs are toddlers until at least two years old.

Also, ask for this to be moved to the dog house as you’ll get more replies.

Having just come out of puppy stage with a 14 month old collie/retriever I honestly wouldn't have wanted to do it with a baby. She still petrifies me anywhere near little kids she has jumped up at 7 year olds and they look so frail in comparison to her. (they were fine and just laughed)

Your timing plan does make sense but many dogs are still bouncy and jumpy for quite a long time we have done lots of training to try and get her not to jump up and she is generally quite calm. The practicalities of house training and babies I think you've got covered but I think you just need to consider the practicalities of newly mobile toddler child and stroppy teenager dog coinciding to make sure DC is safe in 12 months time.

Honestly, don't do it.

It's going to be a mammoth amount of work for all of you. You'll have two babies at first, then two toddlers, and only one of those toddlers is going to grow up. The other is going to be knocking over all the children like bowling pins and mugging them for food.

You haven't got the dog yet so you have time to say "you know what, I'll wait".

Thanks all for the replies. How do I move a thread?!

Alwaysgrey - after hubby is back to work pup will be at home until vaccinations are done then he can have a few days at home & a few days at work with hubby. We want to get him/ her used to the car and being out and about. I understand going into work might not happen immediately but as soon as we can!

Billybagpuss thank you, I appreciate the hard facts. My concern is if we leave it another few years I’ll be back to work (part time) and I will then have a toddler and a puppy -is that likely to be harder? My son is 7 and would just love it I know he will.
When my DC is up and walking (say around a year old) pup would would approx 8/9 months by then. Hubby can take on a bigger role taking pup to work. I know possibly still not ideal but as I say if we wait 2/3 years and then get a puppy, it’s bound to knock over DC at that point anyway?

Thanks bunnygeek will take it onboard, I have read a lot saying don’t do it with one so young so will certainly not rush into it!

i got my first dog when my DS was 10 weeks old and the puppy was 10 weeks old. Poo is poo no matter where it comes from. When DS needed a nap that was walk time for the dog. Got us all out of the house and was just like having another child. They grew up together and were best of friends.
Just set the boundaries from day one, eg i had the baby gate on the door closed for feed time so dog wouldnt be able to disturb, he soon learnt and would lie in his bed waiting for us to finish.

Haha as soon as I post moving the thread you get lots of replies . Doesn't hurt though to have one in that section as well.

allinmyhead12 thank you for the reply! Glad to hear it can work with a bit of organisation. I plan to give pup run of kitchen / dining / family room (wipe clean floors!) but keep out of the lounge for the time being. Also would crate train so as you say during meals we’d pop back in there!

Haha, thanks BiteyShark :) x

How will you take a puppy out every half an hour and after food/playing/water etc to toilet train when you have a 5 month old? If you’re not that militant about it it means dog accidents all over the house with a baby and a child. Yuck.

Where will puppy be when you do the school run?

What would you do it puppy bites your baby? Or your older child? Biting is super common when they’re young.

What happens when both your children are unwell, your husband is at work without the dog and it needs to go for a walk? You can’t ignore its needs even for a day.

What will you do with the dog when you want holidays, days out with the kids where dogs aren’t welcome, even just to pop out for lunch for longer than a couple of hours?

These are just some of the questions I’d be asking myself before I considered getting a dog. I’m desperate for a puppy! Had dogs all my life and it feels weird not having one, but dd is only 2.5 and I know I can’t give them both adequate time to make it work currently.

Btw I replied on your other thread which hopefully might get some of the regular doghouse posters answering there as well.

I wouldn’t. Puppies bite. It hurts. And in the early weeks you can’t take your eyes off them in order to toilet train them. You can’t shut it out of the lounge and be in the lounge with the kids.
School age is much better.
And what work does DH do? He can’t leave it shut in the car all day for example.

Sorry what I meant was will the dog be left at home all day alone when your husband doesn’t take it to work?

Mustardscreams thanks for the response. There is an awful lot to think about I know. Hence doing as much research as possible before we commit! I get that pup won’t be toilet trained in just two weeks but hubby will be about initially to do the half hourly let outs, from there on in it’s me!

School run we can walk, and I do regularly so once vaccinated would come with. We then go via the park on the way home.

Biting yes a big consideration - thank you will think a bit harder on this one.

If children are unwell yes again a consideration but if we “what if’d“ everything we’d never leave the house what if I broke my leg and couldn’t walk the dog. If we REALLY couldn’t get out we have a reasonable sized garden that pup can play in until hubby returns and he’d have to walk that day. Surely no different to people that take on dogs but then return to work?

Holidays yes again a consideration, we plan to do cottage type holidays the next couple of years and take pooch with. If we want to go abroad it’ll be kennelling, my parents have done this with their dogs and I’d be happy to with ours. I have considered our lifestyle in this and still think a dog would compliment and not hinder us.

Thanks BiteyShark - appreciate the help

Wolfiefan - thanks too for your reply. Definitely still pondering the puppy biting!
Oh goodness no way we’d leave a puppy in the car, not only is absolutely cruel but it would destroy the car no doubt!! He works with boats x

Alwaysgrey, no I’m home full time at the moment on maternity leave. Taking a year off and so would go back January time but only a couple of days a week. I’m fortunate that I can work from home so would possibly do a day in the office and then another day or two from home. We would get a dog walker in the day I wasn’t about to walk pup

We waited until both kids were in school (so youngest was 4). You have to train the kids how to behave with a dog as much as the train the puppy how to behave. No dog is 100% safe when dealing with a moving unpredictable bundle that may poke it in the eye or pull its tail and emit high pitched cries. Dogs can be unbelievable patient but a puppy is learning. Wait. Get a dog when youngest is in school and oldest can help walk dog etc. Then the dog should be around up until youngest starts uni and maybe longer!

Yep mine would eat the car!
Haha to half hourly let outs. It’s more like taking them out after a nap and a play and a drink and food and then every half an hour. And you can’t let them out. You have to take them on a lead so you can praise them. It’s bloody hard work.

Okay, as someone who got a golden retriever pup in August last year after copious amounts of research and pondering, I can give you my experience of what it actually was like:

"I have researched the breed and the initial stages."
Please also research the 7-8 month 'play biting and play attacking' stage that I found nothing about in books etc. Honestly, he went bonkers and thought he was being hilarious running at us and attacking us and leaving me with massive bruises on my arms and ripped clothes. It's a thing with labs and golden retrievers, apparently - they always grow out of it, but I'd be very worried about having a little person around at that stage.

"He is also in a position (once pup is ready) to take him/her into work, not everyday but certainly a couple of days a week."
What job does your DH do? I'm just reaching the stage where I don't have to keep an eye on dog (now 11 months) every moment he's awake to ensure he's not up to anything naughty. I hope your DH realises this.

"My son is 7 and would just love it I know he will. "
My kids are older and said exactly the same, even signing a "puppy pledge" promising they would always help. They did at first, but after a few weeks, the novelty completely wore off. They got really fed up of the hard work, the boring 'keeping an eye on him' all the time phase. They stopped enjoying him, they actually stopped liking him for a while as he was a total pain in the arse most of the time.

I disagree with those saying you'll have two babies and then two toddlers. You'll have a toddler dog from day one (straight into potty training) and a baby. Then you'll have a teenage arsehole dog and a toddler.

" I plan to give pup run of kitchen / dining / family room (wipe clean floors!) " - what could possibly go wrong? But yes, do get a crate, it will keep you sane.

You will probably be getting the puppy blues at some stage - make sure you come on MN to get you through it.

The good news is, my boy is brilliant now. But your first year, possibly more, will be a stressful nightmare - do you really want that AND a wee baby to look after?

Think long and hard OP. I'd wait a bit if I were you - then get a grown up rescue dog.

Thanks all, certainly opened my eyes. Despite thinking I’d got it covered, the amount of people on here that have said no concerns me.
My little girl has to come first and if she is going to be a target then I think we’ll have to park the idea.
Thanks again so much xx

Have you considered rehoming an older dog. Most of your issues are toddler child coinciding with stroppy teenage dog.

Most dogs calm down a lot after 2 years old and you won’t have to deal with bitey stage or the I’m just going to run off and totally ignore you stage.

Downsides to this plan is finding somewhere that will allow you to rehome with young children and you never quite know if there will be any issues that need training out.

I'm sure it's possible and that other people have done it but I wouldn't recommend it... I got my dog as a puppy 3 years ago and the training took up my life. She's now, at 3, sensible enough for us to trust her to cope around first baby due this month. Older children can be taught how to behave around a dog and are more predictable. Older dogs have been trained some basic commands, you know them better to know when they're getting too excited or worried and don't need the same intense input they did as puppies. Unpredictable, untrained puppy plus unpredictable baby/toddler with their sounds, grabbing, sudden movements seems a bad idea to me.

It's not what you want to hear but I'd wait till the baby is old enough to follow instructions and understand what he can/can't do with a puppy or get an older dog which is trained and is used to a young family.

Thanks billybagpus we’re just starting to think about an older dog. My concerns as you say would be safety round my children (similar to a puppy!) depending on its unbringing.

Thanks @Rubberduckies what breed is your dog if you don’t mind me asking?

I think our worry with leaving it a few years is funnily enough the time we can commit to a puppy! I will be back at work by then (only part time) but would only be able to take a couple of weeks holiday at a time for settling in. I’m permanently home now until January! Still can’t help but think timing is never going to be perfect but I’m here! Other people deal with more than one or two little children. I have my baby and my son will be at school (besides holidays). I’m not sure, we’re still considering!

I replied on your other thread and thought you’d decided against the idea

Please don’t do it or you’ll be on here in a few months moaning about being at the end of your tether with a pup who’s just being a pup. Anyway, if you’re going to go to a responsible breeder, you may not even have a pup by the time you go back to work. If you can go out and get a pup tomorrow, then it will be from a puppy farm or back yard breeder and that’s an absolute no-no

Some rescues may consider you, but the majority won’t re home to families with small children, for all the reasons already stated