Puppy and a baby?

[gsjd8]

Hi everyone, new to posting on here although I have read many threads already so I know I am touching on an “already covered” subject!!
I would love to hear views from both sides, is this really such a crazy thing to consider? So a little about us, I have a 7 year so he’s at school. I also have a 5 month old and yes we are considering bringing a puppy into our household. Specifically a Labrador!
I have done what feels like endless research into this although I fully appreciate you never do quite know what it’s like until you’re in the thick of it, up to your ears in poo / wee / chewing and so on, but I still find myself wanting to do it. I realise it will be hard work!
My parents have had dogs over the years and I have played a role in helping (although again I appreciate helping and being ultimately responsible are totally different).
I have researched the breed and the initial stages. we would crate train from day one. Hubby would take 2 weeks off work when we bring pup home. He is also in a position (once pup is ready) to take him/her into work, not everyday but certainly a couple of days a week.
We will book into puppy training classes and have already looked into this. I fully appreciate the first few months will be mayhem but is it still advisable to wait?
Time wise I feel is never going to be perfect but as my little one is not yet on the move I feel we could get the initial toilet training under control first? Also by the time she is walking I would hope the puppy will be starting to settle so not so bouncy?
Would love to hear both sides, has anyone managed it?
Thanks in advance x

Hi @Costacoffeeplease thanks for the response. I’ve gone through pages and pages of Mumsnet threads about puppies and yes I do get what you’re saying about people at the end of their tether with puppies but that’s not all just people with babies / young children. Of course a puppy is extremely hard work, I’m not denying that but everyone will moan about the work whether they’re old / young / working / children or not.
I do also think a lot of people are quick to jump on people and completely write the idea off (ducks and takes cover )
My friend for example (who I’ve been filling in on this thread) has a lab and took the puppy on with a 2.5 year old child. Yes hard work but they’re fine! Also a breeder sold to them?
We would never look at a puppy farm, what do you mean by a back yard breeder?

I mean someone who does it purely for the money

Good breeders don’t have puppies available now, they have waiting lists for planned litters... sometimes up to a year beforehand.

Puppy farmers aren’t as obvious as you’d think, they use houses nowhere near where they’ve bred them and have entire stunt families and even dogs to make themselves look like someone breeding their pet...

I do also think a lot of people are quick to jump on people and completely write the idea off

And do you not think that those people have good reason and experience for writing the idea off? But you know better? Ok

We wouldn’t do that either. We are both pretty intelligent (I’d like to think) and have lists of questions we’d want answered before we felt it right, equally whoever we purchased the puppy from would want to know about us and I would take both my children with us to be completely transparent. It has to work both sides.

I’ve got to be honest and this is aimed at one single person but a few of the comments extremely judgemental. Could we not all sit and pick fault in everyone’s situation?
I’ve read on here about single people (so no kids) taking on puppies but then working full time - surely to some (NOT ME I’d like to clarify) that would be unfair on the dog?
I on the other hand am completely open minded and think everyone can make it work with the right mind and commitment.
We haven’t rushed the decision and are still doing as much research as we can. If we had literally decided to pop out one day (because we were bored) to look at a litter of puppies and fell in love then I think there’s more grounds for arguments.
I still haven’t said 100% yes we are doing it. My children are my first priority. We are simply just looking at all possibilities.

Meant to say this isn’t aimed

I totally understand your longing for a dog and it is so difficult to find the right time - maternity leave has pros and cons. I understand and agree with a lot of the reservations people have about a puppy, but would also urge you to consider an adult dog. It might be a long hunt to find a suitable dog (those up for rehoming sometimes have issues with anxiety, children etc) but you could find a lovely dog to join your family. From my experience- we have a 12 year old dog and a 7 month old baby (dog here long before baby) and although she is very good with children it does add an extra layer of watchfulness to the baby stage - I never leave the room (even for 10 seconds) with them together just in case baby pulled her tail or something. So could add extra stress with your 2 little ones to have to be constantly watching for this type of thing. Could you dog-sit a friends dog for a few days a see how it goes? Good luck with whatever you decide.

Aimed at me? Just say so, much clearer

I’m afraid I am judgemental when it comes to people who have not had a pup before telling people like me (who has had at least 9 puppies, some of whom I’ve kept and some I have bottle fed and fostered until approx 8-10 weeks, exactly the age you would be getting one) all about what raising a puppy entails

Cross post

Hi @tabulahrasa thanks for the info. We had made contact (that is it so far) with a private individual who had bred their own dog for just one litter. They used a stud dog and have paperwork available for both to show the correct health checks had been done. They are an older couple who have bred as they wanted to keep one puppy themselves as they live out in the sticks and use them as gun dogs, they live on a farm and sound completely legit. Obviously “IF” we go and view the litter we will be asking further questions and checking everything fits!

I wouldn't.

We got a puppy earlier this year and our DD is 2.

They hype each other up and I wouldn't recommend having a puppy with a young child. There have been MANY occasions over the last six months where we have seriously considered re-homing him because he can be so hyper and boisterous that we can't have him out at the same time as our DD.

I am hoping as he gets older he will calm down but I wouldn't ever get a puppy again just because of our experience with him. I knew puppies were hard work but he is a bloody nightmare sometimes.

@Costacoffeeplease no it really wasn’t aimed at you. I asked for advice and am happy to listen. And I have never claimed to fully know what raising a puppy fully entails so I don’t find that comment helpful.
Thanks again, we haven’t decided either way.

They sound like back yard breeders. Much easier to get a pup from a reputable breeder than breed from your own dog, with all the attendant costs and potential problems.

Meant to say, we did consider a rescue but because of young DD and the fact we have cats, we seemed to be excluded from most shelters.

I would have preferred an older dog to avoid the puppy stage but then again, with an older dog - you don't always know the history so you can't be sure how they behave with children and as above, many shelters won't rehome with young children.

Puppies can be a nightmare and I wouldn't do it again!

But you think you know better than other people who have given advice. Just because you’re on maternity leave is not a reason to get a pup, it’s actually a reason NOT to get a pup

You can ask all the questions you want - it’ll not really help when they’re set up specifically to trick people.

The way to get an ethically bred, healthy and temperamentally sound puppy is to start looking for a breeder who is planning a litter in the future - labs aren’t rare, but you’d still be looking at a 6 month to a year in the future.

@Costacoffeeplease no I don’t. You’re being unhelpful now. I’ve never claimed to know better. Thanks and goodbye

Unhelpful because I’m not saying what you want to hear? Better to stay and discuss surely?

I got 2 puppies when my girls were 3&4. I regret it. I've always had dogs but I let them down. Didn't have time to do it properly. Poor buggers. Now both 10. Still regretting not having had time to do it properly.

Kids dragged out in all weathers for walks. No fun for them either. I'm sure you'll do as you please but it's a bad idea.

I’m still here discussing!!
I really didn’t want to come on here to upset anyone. I can only stress again that I am incredibly grateful for the advice and we are taking it all onboard. I have already been in contact with a rescue home and am awaiting a call back for their advice on young children around a rescue dog!
I promise you all I am listening!!

They are an older couple who have bred as they wanted to keep one puppy themselves as they live out in the sticks and use them as gun dogs, they live on a farm

Putting aside the fact the couple may not be backyard breeders. The environment this puppy will be bought up in, is nothing like the home you would be offering.

For example the puppy won't have had experiences of children or busy road noise.

Good working dogs are spoken for quicker than other types anyway... so it’s even more of a red flag that they have puppies available.

Thanks @IceRebel I hadn’t thought of the busy road! We don’t live in a busy area ourselves in fact opposite a protected nature reserve will miles of heathland. They did touch on the children aspect and said they had grandchildren who have been playing a role in helping / socialising. In fact their family are keeping a couple of puppies “apparently” (I’m as guarded as you all too so don’t worry on that count!)
Can you counter this by plenty of socialisation in the early days? They’ve said if we do visit and commit they would want us to visit every week until pup is ready to come home so he/she can get to know us a little before hand.

@tabulahrasa is that even the case if they are not actually a breeder per se? Again they claim to not breed again after this. Of course I can’t be sure on that, no one could?

Wait so the puppies have already been born? If so that's a massive red flag, as most breeders will have had families lined up way before the birth, often even before the mating. Especially so in this case as I assume they move in gundog circles, so there will have been plenty of interest.