Looks like we have to sell our puppy :(

[bounty5]

We got her at the beginning of the summer at a time when my husband worked mainly from home. Our circumstances are now changed, so looks like we have to sell her. I think we've considered all possibilities of holding onto her. But in case there is an angle that I have overlooked, I am appealing to mum's net... We've asked family and friends to look after her during the week and holidays (I work in a college, term-time only so am free in holidays), but no-one is able to take on the long term commitment. We tried 'borrow-my-doggy' - but that would be a bit patchy, unreliable, not fair on her and stressful for us. So we've found a buyer and met up with them... Assuming they are interested, she will spend a final weekend with us, then on Sunday it will be goodbye! Any last minute ideas before we take the plunge?? Or since a sale is looking likely, I would like to know if anyone has been through this before. My 12 year old will be especially upset - does anyone have any inspirational words that will help us through this difficult time?

Or even a goldfish.

Anything alive and sentient deserves love and respect and commitment - for life.

If you aren't prepared to give that, don't bother.

Its the whole lassez faire approach to the original OP that really doesn't help in this situation. I bet the OP is going to come back and drip feed a load of nonsense in order to not sound so callous.

I have a four month old puppy who I am in total love with, as she is with us. I can't imagine ever writing the original OP in such a jolly and matter of fact manner. I would never ever contemplate selling her like a handbag either....she would be found a new home irrespective of what she had cost me and I would give her away if I was absolutely at my wits end and desperate for whatever reason.

I am so so upset by this bloody thread, I really wish I hadn't read it . That poor puppy

**I wouldn't just "give her away" either. I mean't she would be free to a much vetted and much thought through new home.

Employ a doggy day care service FFS!

Can I just say please re think this. I gave (not sold) my dog away to a farm when I was 19 because my family kicked me out and I couldn’t get a new home for us both. I should never have got a dog at such a young, irresponsible age and it plays on my mind constantly. I still cry regularly at how confused she must have been the day she went and never see me again. She adored me the poor beautiful dog must have been so sad :(
I now have another dog at the age of 30 and give him a fantastic life huge walks twice a day, work from home and even with a 4 month old baby he is adored and given his separate attention. I treat him how I wish I could have treated my first dog. Please don’t give up on your puppy, please do everything you can as I assure you your pup loves you and his family already. Also this gives completely the wrong message to your 12 year old.
Sorry about the rant.

Funny how so many dog lovers on mumsnet are so vile to actual people

I am not referring to the OP but just wanted to say that my dog is much better company than most people I know.

RLOU

This entire thread is foul (but definitely not OP). I am asking MNHQ to delete.

I don’t think you can just ask MN to delete a thread that’s not yours! They’ve deleted many nasty posts which is good , so I’m sure they’re aware of this.

I highly recommend doggy day care - our pooch goes there every day and he loves it!

I can ask anything. Whether MN listens I don't know and maybe don't care, but glad I told them (I think that) they should. The rush to condemn on here is disgusting. We know nothing of the OP's full circumstances.

The OP was quite clear about circumstances and had good suggestions about how to deal with the situation. The nastier posts were deleted.

This is a brutal community. If I was so callous, why would I put up a post asking for suggestions about how I can keep her? We want to keep her!! My circumstances have changed in a way that I couldn’t have anticipated. If I mention the reason, that will invite a whole new load of abuse (e.g. Loubilou 09 – about me drip feeding a load of nonsense), and if I don’t people will make their own assumptions based on the worst possible case they can imagine. Ignoring the abuse, I am listening to the suggestions. Many of those ideas have occurred to me already, but genuinely, I want advice:

• For a dog walker or sitter, they have the keys to my house? Is that how it’s done? My landlady is funny about that kind of thing
• I did look into doggy day care – maybe I didn’t look around that much but the place I looked at was way beyond my means. I live in London, I don’t earn so much. (no I’m not taking luxury holidays in case anyone wants to lay into me on that one) For the people who expressed welfare concerns:
• My puppy is very much loved
• Yes I bought her on gum tree (sorry). We saw the mother and all puppies seemed in good health. I was slightly concerned about the lack of paperwork and the owner didn’t seem that helpful in answering my questions to the full. But we’d fallen in love with her by then (we first met her at a week old). I took her straight the vet – she was and is still in good health.
• She has an idyllic life. I spend all my time with her. At some point towards the end of the summer my circumstances changed. It is not by the way (as some of the most hurtful messages suggested) that she has become a bit troublesome or we’ve got bored with her! I want her to continue with the good life style that she has had and that we thought we could give. I’ve asked so many friends and family because I’d rather give her to someone we know. But nobody that I know can make a long term commitment. As for the breeder, I didn’t get the impression that there was any option of returning her. I never asked, never thought it would be necessary. So yes I put an ad on gum tree. And yes there is a price, on my sister’s advice that she may fall into dodgy hands (yes I hear your thoughts that I am one of those evil types). I am very careful about who she goes to - not any old person as has been assumed. But as it is approaching that point, I don’t feel I can let her go! But can I provide for her needs?? That is why I posted!

Can you put a notice in your shop asking for a dog walker ? Someone who's retired and wouldn't mind taking the dog out ? What time is your DD home, could she walk it as soon as she gets home ?

-For a dog walker or sitter, they have the keys to my house? Is that how it’s done? My landlady is funny about that kind of thing yes they would need to have a key but it’s not any different to having a cleaner or something like that. Would your landlady really have a problem with that?

-I did look into doggy day care – maybe I didn’t look around that much but the place I looked at was way beyond my means. I live in London, I don’t earn so much. (no I’m not taking luxury holidays in case anyone wants to lay into me on that one) cost varies hugely so I would really look around a bit more. As an example, for places within 5 miles of me now I can pay between £17 and £40 per day. So huge variance.

I think honestly the selling was a big problem. I can see that your sister wants to make sure the dog goes to a good home and people do say that charging money helps with that, but the advice to go back to breeder or a good rescue is better. The breeder should take the puppy back but if it was someone from Gumtree then in reality he/she probably won’t.

God, I would love a dog. I would actually love two. The kids would love a couple as well.

We haven't got one and won't ever have one.

Why?

Because we live in rented houses and we don't know when our situation could change. Our landlord at the moment would be fine with us having dogs. I work at home so could be with them.

Next year, we could have to move. Next year, I might have to find a job that I have to go out to.

We have planned ahead, considered our circumstances long term and understand that despite desperately wanting one, it wouldn't be fair, or right, to have a dog.

If only all potential dog owners would think about the future before they take on a beautiful little puppy and potentially ruin its life.

Take her to a breed rescue OP.

There are lots of dogs left on there own throughout the day. Mine are although we do have a dog flap and leave music on for them. We have two dogs plus a flap and they are all happy.

Does your 12yr old get home straight after school?

I am of the same mind as others in saying I don’t think you have explored any options let alone ALL of them. Some dogs are fine to be left at home all day if they are walked well morning and night, (many aren’t to be fair) but if it is a spaniel then he may be ok. OP what breed is your puppy? I would be very very careful about selling a dog to a stranger. You need to get their name and address and proof of such for the microchip form for starters, he is most likely being bought as bait for dog fighting as any person worth their salt would not buy a family pet from gumtree or any other selling site. Please think about what you are doing to this poor baby.

Without knowing how your circumstances have changed it's hard to give precise advice but I would echo everyone else's suggestion of a professional dog walker, my SIL has one for her dog and it means she's out and about for a good few hours while the walker collects the other dogs, walks them and drops them all back at home afterwards, getting lots of exercise and interaction.

I understand that life changes. I do. And I do believe you want to do the best by your dog. Which is why I urge you to please consider giving up to rescue if you really can't keep them. Especially if they are a 'high value' breed (I hate thinking of dogs that way) like a pug or a Frenchie etc. Or at the very least get them neutered before you rehome.

This thread has made me want to cry.

Please please please DO NOT SELL her to someone off Gumtree. Contact a breed specific rescue and they will foster her and find a genuine family via adoption. There are hundreds based across the UK for this very reason. Even try Battersea as I can imagine a puppy will be easily rehomed and thoroughly background checked.

You'll meet a nice family via Gumtree, they'll turn up with kids and tell you all about their nice home and what a lovely life your dog will have. A few hours later she'll be being used as bait for dog fighting and ripped apart limb by limb. Please please please don't do this .

Some PP on this bread are fucking nuts! We’re not all millionaires who can afford a dog walker on top of other house hold costs. She’s asking for advice not for a bunch of people on the internet telling her she’s revolting etc. Previous posters are the ones that should be ashamed! I assume she is selling to gain serious interest, not just someone wanting a pup for free!

OP - id advise you get in touch in the breeder see if they can help first before doing anything else

Well this was only going to go one way really....not sure what the op expected

Or maybe even give it a few more months and see how you go. I have 2 dogs, 1 walk in the morning, nip home at lunch time to let them out in the garden, another walk in the evening and they’re perfectly fine.

We’re not all millionaires who can afford a dog walker on top of other house hold costs

Well then you don’t get a dog you can’t walk, do you? It’s not difficult.