Looks like we have to sell our puppy :(

[bounty5]

We got her at the beginning of the summer at a time when my husband worked mainly from home. Our circumstances are now changed, so looks like we have to sell her. I think we've considered all possibilities of holding onto her. But in case there is an angle that I have overlooked, I am appealing to mum's net... We've asked family and friends to look after her during the week and holidays (I work in a college, term-time only so am free in holidays), but no-one is able to take on the long term commitment. We tried 'borrow-my-doggy' - but that would be a bit patchy, unreliable, not fair on her and stressful for us. So we've found a buyer and met up with them... Assuming they are interested, she will spend a final weekend with us, then on Sunday it will be goodbye! Any last minute ideas before we take the plunge?? Or since a sale is looking likely, I would like to know if anyone has been through this before. My 12 year old will be especially upset - does anyone have any inspirational words that will help us through this difficult time?

[DarlingNikita]

Try your local Nextdoor.com site for recommendations for walkers etc.

[NotANotMan]

If your DH has moved out but still not working can he do daycare?

[littledinaco]

though don’t believe everyone is that bad no of course not. Some people (like yourself are genuine people but just naive) are obviously ok but there is a chance that you would sell to someone who won’t have the dogs best interests at heart and it’s not worth taking that risk.

Also, the fewer people who buy and sell pets on Gumtree (even the honest ones) the better really. Reputable breeders and rescue centres are the way to go.

In terms of checking a dog walker, I suppose it’s like checking a cleaner. Can you ask round for recommendations, maybe ask in your local vets, pet shops etc.

[LIVIA999]

I'm so relieved you aren't selling on gumtree. I have this conversation sooooooo much re gumtree and pets.
I talked to someone recently who told me with such sadness ' we had to sell our dog as we realised as it was a girl it would have periods'

[bounty5]

What I mean is, how can you be sure that the dog walkers are not the dodgy types who scour gum tree, and then they do a runner with your dog? Given the uproar that I have created on this topic, is word of mouth a good system of vetting?

[bounty5]

'littledinaco' - but I like your suggestion, I will ask at the vet

[LIVIA999]

I think most will supply references. Good ones anyhow.

[NotANotMan]

Find a dog walker with a good online presence and reviews.

[unicornchaser]

I use a dog walker and have done since my dog was 5 months.
I found her through a local dog services page on Facebook. I put an advert that I was looking for a dog walker and had numerous people recommend her.
There are dozens of walkers who have business websites but I struggled to find anyone with a space available hence going to Facebook for more options.

She came to my house to meet us and the dog, provided all her insurance details and documents. The meeting also made sure that we were comfortable with her and our dog would take to her too.
The papers and recommendations were enough to reassure me she was reliable.

Also, it's their livelihood at stake if any bad reports come out about them so I wouldn't worry about them having keys to your house! Just don't even entertain anyone who isn't willing to bring you the insurance and business papers along with a business contract.

[passwordfailure]

OP - I have two jrt and wouldn't mind including your's in our daily walk. PM me where you are in London.

[fenneltea]

Well done OP; I hope it works out okay for all of you. I think you've saved a potentially huge mistake from happening. Hopefully you'll find a suitable arrangement and can keep her, or at least have contact and see her as you wish.

[bounty5]

Many thanks for thanks for all your replies, even the negative ones! It stopped me from doing something that I certainly would have regretted. I don't know the answer yet but I'm feeling positive. Thank you 'Lovethetimeyouhave' and 'passwordfailure - I will send a private message to you both in relation to your questions. And thanks to 'littledinaco' - I did ask at the vet and a customer waiting there with their dog overheard the conversation and gave me the contact details of the person who often walks his dog. He was with his dog and was in the vet, so that's a good sign right? (sorry but I just don't know who to trust now after reading this thread!). Any other practical suggestions to my situation are very welcome, or maybe I should start a new thread (or maybe not)

[SoftSheen]

If you can't or don't want to keep the puppy, either return it to its breeder, or failing that, take it to a rescue centre. Please don't sell it, you have no idea what sort of home it might end up in.

[Janus]

Well done, you’ve listened to many good snippets of advice. I found my dog walker by seeing the van around! Are you on a local Facebook page as you could ask there and I’d pick a couple names that come up lots of times and enquire!
Hope you find someone that works for you and sorry for your change of circumstances.

[littledinaco]

In terms of trusting a dog walker, obviously you can never be completely safe but I think going with a recommendation and checking it out as best you can (seeing if it’s a proper business, how long it’s been established for, looking for good/bad reviews) is the safest possible way.

The Gumtree thing isn’t just about getting dodgy people, it’s about supporting just ‘anyone’ to breed dogs. As long as people keep buying from Gumtree, these people will keep breeding and selling.
If everyone only bought from professional breeders then there wouldn’t be a market for those to sell on Gumtree which can only be a good thing for the animals involved.

I think part of why you got such angry responses is generally people who buy a dog from Gumtree just haven’t done their research properly. At least you are aware now and you’re puppy won’t be sold via Gumtree and you’re kids and hopefully other people will now know why. The more the word can be spread the better!

[DarlingNikita]

He was with his dog and was in the vet, so that's a good sign right?

I would think so, yes.

[AdoraBell]

Get the dog walker to come to yours and see how they and the puppy interact, make sure the puppy is happy around them. Obvs do the other things suggested re checking the company etc.

[ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs]

So happy to see you are not going down the Gumtree route, OP. As a vet myself, I see so many horror stories, and the veterinary world is really trying to tighten up on online sales, so great that you have taken heed!
I'm really hoping you can find a way to keep the pup, as it sounds as though your family is going through a bit of upheaval, and it really is amazing how much help a dog can be to a child in those sort of circumstances. It really touches me how my children turn to our dogs when they have a bad day, or a fall out with friends. That unconditional love is very special
Good luck!

[MrMeSeeks]

Hope you’ve sorted something op!

[psicat]

Great to hear OP, hope you can get something sorted with dog walk. Ask for: references, insurance (a MUST!) , DBS check - and even qualifications such as behavioural and first aid. Some walkers are now using tracking apps and cameras so you can see what they get up to on their walks. Make you sure you agree what kind of walk she has - how long (not long at all at her age, time is more important than distance), will she be mixing with other dogs (possibly good if well matched - should only be one or two dogs though, don't go to one that has 10-15 dogs together, you'll end up with host of problems) and so on.
Dog walking is not currently licensed or regulated but some councils are doing voluntary registration or asking them to sign up to code of conduct. Check your council's website to see if they are one.

Finally, have a look at this option but have a long think as to whether or not this is a short term fix or something that can work going forward. Pup is very rehomeable at this age and would be snapped up by a rescue. If try for 6 months but really it's not going to work out you'll probably have to be on a waiting list, pup may have to wait longer for a home and it's generally tougher.

Although it's my job to deal with the fallout of situations like this I accept that sometimes things just don't work out - sometimes it's the unexpected you can't control. It's about doing what's right by the dog to set her up going forward. Moving around is not going to be good for her especially at this impressionable age so you want to keep that to a minimum.

Some rescues like the Blue Cross do home direct schemes to reduce the amount of time spent in kennels. The dog still gets neutered etc and has all the back up of the rescue but stays in the home whilst trying to find a new one. There are options

I hope of course you don't have to take that route and you can keep your puppy but don't worry about rehoming her through a good rescue if it's not going to work out.

[bounty5]

I just want to apologise for the distress that this post has caused. I read the replies in full today. I was shocked and sickened - especially since I felt I was putting her interests first, by giving her a better home (long hours alone, if it came to that, is sad). I don't know that many people in the doggy community and I genuinely did not realise that 'selling' was so offensive (I bought her in the first place, money was exchanged then?). As for gum tree, I am aware of puppy farms. I did research it, about the signs to look out for, the questions to ask... but I had not idea of the extent of it. Now I know! I WILL NOT BE GOING DOWN THAT ROUTE. My situation did change, as in I am a single parent now which has huge implications for the hours I must work and the ammount of people around to care for young pup. I'm hopeful about doggy care - I just thought that was for the super rich (which I am not but the way, as one person alluded to), but have been recommended a few indivdiuals who are being carefully vetted!

[Namechangeforthiscancershit]

Hi OP

You’re made of stronger stuff than me sticking with this thread. I’m impressed!

Lovely update. I really do hope this works out for you because pets can be such a huge help for getting through upheaval and difficult times, for adults and kids. I hope in 10 years time bountydog will be snuggled up to you on the sofa and you’ll think that having him as part of your family when things changed with your marriage was the best thing you could do and that you wouldn’t be without him.

But if it doesn’t you are not a monster for rehoming in a sensible and responsible way. Far from it.

[Frankenterfer]

It's a learning curve OP and you've stuck with it and are doing your best to do the right thing. I hope you can find a way to make this work for you all, I had a JR growing up and she was lovely.

Regarding our sitter / walker, we found her as a recommendation through word of mouth, she came to visit us with her paperwork, meet our pup etc. Yes, she has a key to the house but there is an element of trust involved and as a business woman we trust her to do the right thing by our pup and by us. She is very good, great with advice and support, too.

[babysharkdodododododododo]

The way messages are conveyed on MN sometimes completely distract from the original -valid- point.

Gumtree isn't the best way to buy and sell pets, ok.

However suggesting it's common for pets to be bought for bait for dog fights is absurd. It's like so many other things on MN, it's happened and so now apparently it's common place.

Also agree with other PP about rescues, our local rescue is having people dump their dogs and cats outside as they've given a 6 month wait list. They are fit to burst.

The idea rescues are regularly prosecuting people for not having the dog when they call is ridiculous too. They have enough to do.

Rescues do a good job of vetting people but it's possible to do that yourself. Selling or buying a dog through any means but direct from a breeder or rescue doesn't make you some hideous dog eating monster.

[mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork]

Ask other dog owners in the park if they know of good dogwalkers/doggy day care places. When you've had/been walking your dog longer, you will meet loads of new acquaintances who are dog people - it is unavoidable and they are a mine of helpful information. Also could ask at your vet's (I did this when new to my area and knew no-one and needed a dogwalker - the reception staff are often dog-owners too and know the local dogwalkers well). Meet the dogwalker, see how they interact with your dog (if dog is scared of them, doesn't seem to like them, you must find another as it is essential they have a good relationship with each other). Word of mouth is better than adverts. (I live in London too - but in an outer suburb).