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Original poster

i need to get rid of dog she has gone too far and dp is adamant :(

102 replies

muma3 · 09/08/2006 23:21

where do i start?

we have a puginese called tilly . she is just turned one and i have posted on here a few times about her . she is so naughty. she is a theif and is destroying everything . i have all the patince in the world for her and time but she is so disobidient that dp has had enough. she ran off today and he was chasing her for 30mins . she crossed a dual carraige way and nearly got hit 2 times. she takes everything she can up the garden and eats it . we have holes anout a foot deep all over garden . she keeps weeing on ours and dd2 bed even if the door is open for 2 secs she is there . we have tried cage training her and it has made no difference. she has had a smack on her nose a few times and nose rubbed in wee but she does it again . i give her loads of attention when i get the chance but she is always up to something that she is never being good.

when we got her we wanted a toy dog (which she is ) which would be soppy and loving , tilly is boistrous and playful . you only have to move a foot and she will think your playing and eat it .

my friend has got some kittems that she needs to rehome and i have been bugging dp for ages . he said today that we can have 2 if " we get rid of the devil dog "

i just feel awful about it and wont forgive myself but i know its the right thing to do . the guilt is killing me and she hasnt gone yet . the kids have said that they dont care if she goes either . i think we all have had enough tbh.

pleawse tell me dp is right and that i need to be sensible about this ??

OP posts:
FioFio · 10/08/2006 13:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CountessDracula · 10/08/2006 13:51

She is so well Secur! Really the loveliest dog EVER!

Did you take her aunt?

SecurMummy · 10/08/2006 13:55

good I know what you mean mine still talk about her mum all the time!

It was her aunt and uncle together! No we didn't in the end - they got a place closer to home for them, however, the new owners have been asked to contact me should there ever be any problem with the new home. I felt that two in a relativly small home could be problamatic!

Jazzi · 10/08/2006 13:58

Muma3, if it would help, my mother is looking for a toy dog and is experienced in training - if you do decide to rehome her, she would be happy to take her.

DogMum · 10/08/2006 15:31

Hi muma3. Perhaps you could reassure DP that dogs calm down as they get older. It sounds as though she's confused about her place in the pack. Training would really help. Perhaps you could remind DP that having taken the dog into your family, it's your joint responsibility to make it work. Have a look at the Association of Pet Dog Trainers website here to find a trainer near you. Also, a pet behaviour counsellor would be able to help you with behavioural problems at home. Have a look here . Yes it will cost money, but it shouldn't be unreasonable and you can ask for costs up front. Both of these organisations will train the owners, not the dogs - far more effective as it leaves you in charge. And you won't be putting the dog before the kids. They can be involved too and it will be good for them as well as fun. What sort of message would rehoming give your kids about responsible care for pets?

In the meantime, please don't smack your dog (it can lead to aggression.) Sorry if I'm not being helpful about rehoming. I know it's sometimes necessary, but the thought of a dog being removed from the family she loves makes me really sad. Good luck. I really hope you manage to come to a happy conclusion.

ScummyMummy · 10/08/2006 15:56

Surprised at all the posts about cats and kittens being hard work- we must be lucky with ours. Very easy to care for and sweet natured and has been from day 1. Ideal pet really. Would love a dog- sons and I do a lot of searching for puppies online for when we are in a position to get one- but have no room plus have always had them pegged as MUCH harder work. Sorry things aren't working out with yours, muma3. It is a real shame a training course isn't an option though. Maybe if you went on one as a whole family it might reignite your girls' and dp's love and enthusiasm for the dog? Even if it didn't at least you would know in every bone in your body that you'd tried every single option and it just didn't work.

Celia2 · 10/08/2006 16:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 10/08/2006 16:43

'I wish people would be more responsible when getting a dog. It is not a thing, it has feelings. It also has a personality, some dogs are suited to some people/families and others are patently not. '

I agree, CD. That's part of the reason we always adopted or took in adult animals. Their personality is established - you know if it likes children, other cats/dogs, needs to a single pet, etc.

If anyone is considering a pet, please consider an adult or older puppy/kitten in need of a home!

All ours have been utter diamonds in the rough!

lemonaid · 10/08/2006 16:53

muma3, I think some of the critical comments on this thread are directed more at your dp than at you. It sounds as though he's the one who won't put in the time, effort and money to help the dog fit in with your family. Given that he's not supporting you I agree you probably do need the dog rehomed, but I am at him. You sound lovely though.

1Baby1Bump · 10/08/2006 17:00

try two puppies that had to be trained at home as i couldnt afford lessons!
very, very hard work. but most dogs will do anything for a biscuit and they are very clever and learn quickly.
mine are both 3 now and sometimes have ther moments when they do naughty things but an untrained dog is an unhappy dog as they dont know what is expected of them.
i think you should get some books as suggested and all pull together to give it a try and then if you really cant train her, rehome her to someone who has the time.

but tbh, her behaviour sounds normal to me for a dog of her age with no training.

cupcakes · 10/08/2006 17:00

agree with lemonaid.

cupcakes · 10/08/2006 17:02

Out of curiosity, what training books would you all recommend?

1Baby1Bump · 10/08/2006 17:16

i have one called:
'dogs behaving badly'
its very good, it has real examples in it.

it helped us stop barking in the car, wrecking stuff, peeing indoors and most importantly, doing what they are asked when they are asked.

Original poster
muma3 · 10/08/2006 17:16

we havent said we are getting cats i think he was just making a point of he wants to rehome dog .
thanks lemonade
yes we rehomed dp mums dog after she had a stroke as we were in a flat at the time and she got aggresive towards the baby (when she was newborn)

i phoned the long lodge farm and they are taking 10 dogs on first come first served basis on 6th sept . will keep looking

thanks to all for the positive info and support

OP posts:
bubblerock · 10/08/2006 17:42

There are lots of numbers Here on the Pekingese website, I still think that going for a specialised rehomer will give her a better chance and I wouldn't worry too much about them being in your area, I'm sure they will travel - especially when they see her picture!

DogMum · 10/08/2006 19:10

expatinscotland, I agree that there are many adult dogs who need rehoming and it's marvellous when it turns out well for the dog. However, there is a real balance to be struck here. If no one got their dog from a responsible breeder, the breeders would die out and there would only be puppy-farmed or rescue dogs available. While I agree that these dogs deserve a second chance, sadly so many of them don't get one. IMO the important thing is to commit to your dog BEFORE you bring him home, so the dog can be assured of a happy secure home life, whether he was a rescue dog or a puppy when you got him. If everyone did this, there would only be really necessary rehomings (such as people getting sick or going into nursing homes) and so many dogs wouldn't have to be euthanased each year. I think we both want the same things for dogs, I just wanted to point out that people who get puppies aren't all bad. I also have the advantage that I was heavily involved in forming the adult personality of my dog - and he's a real gem.

1baby1bump - training books are an excellent idea. Does 'Dogs behaving badly' include things that are important for dogs to understand how they fit into the human pack - food, territory etc? If not, 'Think Dog' by John Fisher might help and 'The Perfect Puppy' by Gwen Bailey covers this as well.

misdee · 10/08/2006 19:26

I would take your dog at the drop of a hat. i love miniture dogs, but last winter i had to re-some our collie-cross pup as Peter was spending more time in hospital, and we have been advised after transplant not to get an indoor pet. Re-homing my dog broke my heart. she is a lot of work, but surprisingly well behaved. i just felt a lot worse about her spending all her time alone when i was at the hospital.

The cage training? did u do full on training for mroe thn a week? or a half-hearted attempt?

tallulah · 11/08/2006 14:35

A word of warning about the kittens.. You say you have a 4 year old cat and it is fine. We have 4 cats aged 9, 7, 6 and 4. The eldest 2 are mother and son and get on just fine. When we got the third cat we had fights and then stupidly got a fourth cat, which was a disaster. The youngest one thinks he's in charge and bullies all the others. Cats are odd creatures and don't take too kindly to new intruders.

Original poster
muma3 · 11/08/2006 14:53

cage training is an ongoing thing , she stays there for 5-10 Min's depending on what she has done an this is repeated . she is rewarded every time she has obeyed us too . she has started to stop things like "sit" too which is annoying as it feels like we are going backwards with her. she just thinks everything is a game and just bites our fingers when trying to get her to do anything . everything is game to her and being in her cage doesn't help whatsoever she just carries on regardless . don't think we haven't tried because believe me i have tried so hard so that i could show DP she can change but I'm starting to doubt it too

OP posts:
CountryGirl2007 · 28/03/2008 00:21

What happened with this dog in the end?

madamez · 28/03/2008 00:37

They casseroled it.

Qally · 30/03/2008 23:11

I think you probably should rehome her while she's still cute and at a trainable age. My advice would be to contact the most reputable animal charity in your area, be absolutely honest, and make a donation to cover her costs - they'll train her and find an experienced home who will continue that training going forwards. I'm afraid I do think you have a responsibility to donate, because that sort of rehabilitation takes time and money, even over and above food and housing.

Qally · 30/03/2008 23:13

Oops, I just saw how old the thread was!

I want to know what happened, too.

Youcannotbeserious · 31/03/2008 09:59

Muma,

I'm sorry that you don't like the responses, but many dog owners get 'tarnished' because of people who get dogs, don't really like the reality of it and then just get rid of them......... I personally get extremely annoyed at dog owners who don't pick up the poop after their dog (not saying you do this ) because non-dog owners immediately assume that all dog owners are irresponsible and leave dog crap round the place.

As you say you love this dog, why not agree with your DP what acceptable behaviour would be, agree a timescale and then work towards it. If, after your best efforts, the dog is still unmanageable, then rehome him.

Most dogs will learn to get away with what they can.... YOU have to teach it acceptable behaviour within your 'pack'.

I hope you do find a suitable solution...... I can't imagine how I would deal with having to rehome my dog.

LooptheLoop · 31/03/2008 10:03

Poor dog - hope you at least rehome it properly.