The English Langauge Howlers Made By Sheiky's Colleagues: An Occasional Series

[SheikYerbouti]

Following on from one of my colleagues who couldn't be more "persific" with his copy instructions, the colleague who was "annoid" by one of her client and the colleague who holds the account for "Grovenar Casino's", we have the following instructions from a sales person

"FOR THERE ADD, CAN YOU DO A RED, GREEN AND WHITE BOARDER PICTURE OF LEANING TOWER OF PIZZA PLEASE AS THEY HAVE THIS ON THERE' MENUS."

I have copied and pasted it from the work database.

Where do I start?

I have been PMSL about "The leaning tower of pizza" all morning [puerile]

These people should know better.

Well done, moony. I pointed out to my local Somerfield manager that there's no apostrophe in cashiers, but I just got a blank look.

Mrs L always had odd hair, don't you think, fm? I was only taught by her in the first year, she looked a bit like a troll

When we did 6th form entertainment, we based it on "Head Girls' Adventures in Wonderland" (and i never listened in English so no idea if i got that right!).

Our Mrs L impersonator was playing the part of the White Rabbit. Always late, very scatty, and yes mad hair flying free from hastily tied bun.

I played Dr Goode in 6th form entertainment - do you remember him?

SHeikh!!!!
Have you seen today's Sun front page?????

(in my defence, I have been at the hospital all morning, and it was the chap opposite me who was reading it!)

Here

Message withdrawn

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lololol eachpeach!!

I'm going to put it on my profile

OMG, two clangers in one day!

On a wanky "I'll deal with this client and you can all just fuck off" circular e-mail, this was contained within

"....We are closest to the Palace so therefore are the soul contact..."

FFS

Leaning Tower of Pizza

Could you put this image in the boarder on there menus?

Ok, I have another. In fact, I have two from the same ad.

"Colwyn Bay's premiere restaurant
now taking bookings for Christmas"

That's bad enough, but THIS IS A BEAUTY. I have LOLOLOLed to myself all morning about this......

"The widest range of glutton free
options anywhere in the local area"

C'mon, someone HAS to admire "glutton free".

I am PMSL at 'soul contact'
do they burst into a rendition of 'R..E..S..P..E..C..T'?

glutton free is UTTER GENIUS

(and LOL at premiere restaurant in COlwyn BAy. Does it give first performances of avant-grade new music? Is there much competition in the locale?)

Glutton free sounds almost as dull as gluton free.

And at least Colwyn Bay understands that it's christmas not Xmas!

Gluten!!!!!
Gluten!!
Gluten.

Argh

The latest one from today

"Fancy a night out with fiends in Doncaster?"

lololol

Another one I have read just now.

An address this time...

someone in Whitney, Oxen.

fgs

Maybe they were being creative and actually wanted a picture of a pile of pizzas toppling over? Then they'd be saying 'cretin, didn't know the difference between Pisa and Pizza!'

I would a night out with fiends. October 31st?

Lol georgiemum

If you ever met any of my colleagues, you wouldn't be giving them the benefit of the doubt.