Can you help with the below query?

[MikeUniformMike]

I got this in a work-related e-mail today:
"...can you investigate the below query?"

and have just read about "the above link".

AIBU in needing to start a thread about how much it hurts me?

As with small children, all you can do is model correct use of language.

It's too late. I see so much of it. It is so ugly.

My company isn't too bad, perhaps because for many English is a second language.

Is it because the word below should be at the end?

I think it would sound more elegant to flip the words: link above, query below.

Still wanky officespeak!

Urgh! I feel your pain.

I'm intrigued. How would you like it to be written?

Correctly I presume!

I'd write it as : ..."please investigate the following query..."

What CandyLeBonBon posted, or Could you investigate this, please.

I don't like above and below, but " the below link " seems so clumsy.

I probably should be grateful that it had an article.

Ah okay, so no direct reference to the obvious link is the order of the day. Good to know!

I don't work in an office so don't sent that sort of thing, but I've always felt the need to over-explain the obvious in case it's not clearly a clickable link or something! Perhaps if it's not the done thing then I won't!

It the use of below, and above, I particularly dislike.

I see it everywhere. It grates as much as sentences starting with "So,"

I used to dislike click here, especially if the link didn't work, but I see it less now.

I am in Pedants' Corner.

'Query' is frequently used incorrectly in place of 'enquiry' too.

I have another question.
My colleague has sent me an e-mail saying "This is a session where myself and Mike ..."

The colleagues regularly uses 'myself' instead of I or me, and yourself instead of you.

Should I point this out? The colleague is not a native english speaker, and is just starting out.

Obviously, the myself and Mike grated slightly, as it should be Mike and I.

Please help.