I think I may actually faint

[SlightlyJaded]

I have just received this email from someone applying to be involved in a film we are casting. He is a familiar television actor in his late forties and has a fairly impressive list of credits so presumably is literate enough to read and learn a script. I have cut and pasted it exactly as it was typed but changed the name.

It has made me feel quite queasy

Hello! director of the Film Here is the info you ask for: Please put me Forward for any Film or TV. Projects you may have in mind, if i am suited for the Part Please, Contact me Direct: see info below. Thanks for your interest in me, Please view my Reels on the Links, James is very interested in the Film Project , loads of Experience bbc itv c4 and Features Please get in-touch asap Spotlight on: James Howard Reel For Casting in Film &TV (One to Watch) James. Yes. Please thanks : hope This Helps. Lol

Dear god.

BTW, I am not the director of the film.

No corrections necessary, I just needed to share.

bloody hell.

i wonder if he gets much work....

Did he get the Work Experience girl/boy to write it and send it out without checking it?

One can only hope OneHand

But if you had someone that stupid so young/uneducated working in your office, you'd check surely?

Even though it's so full of wrongness that there's no point even pulling it apart, the thing that most bothers me is the jump from first to third person.

That way, madness lies.

Dear me.

I do hope his agent can do better than that.

Oh and the Lol at the end.

The bit that made me feel particularly queasy was "Lol". Though perhaps slightly hysterical "lol - ing" would be the inevitable result of receiving the ...um ... submission.