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Original poster

Bloody handing out of sweets at school on birthdays. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

146 replies

LynetteScavo · 30/09/2008 16:42

DD has finished her tantrum now.

Caused by DS2 being handed a crappy bag of sweets by his teacher as he came out of school.She wanted some. DS gave her one. She was tired from nursery, wanted more, DS said no. Que tantrum.

I didn't particularly want either of them to have them.

I tried tackling this with the school with when DS1 was in reception, and was basically laughed at.

Rant over.

OP posts:
AbbeyA · 30/09/2008 20:50

Two entirely different things pointy dog!

I don't want to go into the fruit thing again but it is an easy rule; healthy snack means different things to different people and so a blanket one of fruit stops arguments. Fruit is also lovely! It is part of the schools healthy eating policy.

Birthday sweets has nothing to do with the school, it is given out on the way out of the door. It is up to the parent whether they let them eat them or save them until later. It gives the birthday DC a lot of pleasure and it would be mean to spoil it for them IMO.

pointydog · 30/09/2008 20:53

It's nothing to do with the school if they choose it to have nothing to do with the school. You have an illogical thought-pattern all round.

Original poster
LynetteScavo · 30/09/2008 20:59

RTKangaMummy - DS's tooth didn't form properly (from when he was in the womb, but we don't know why)

It hasn't been removed - it was filled. It actually cost us nearer £300, as on our first trip to London I bottled out, and had to go back with DH

It was awful. (Yes I'm big wuss but I don't want to go through that again if I don't need to.

But, TBH, it's the gelatine that bothers me as much as the sugar -I just happen to think it's gross.

OP posts:
cheesesarnie · 30/09/2008 21:01

i hate this!!!dd gets some,ds wants some.ds gets some,dd wants some.arrgghh.just stop it or eat them in school!!
i am the nasty mummy who doesnt send anything in on my dc birthdays-i dont get it!!!

AbbeyA · 30/09/2008 21:03

I think you just have it in for me whatever I say pointy dog!
Break time and lunch time are part of the school day. The school has a healthy eating policy-they do their best-sometimes in the face of very difficult parents!

At the end of the day they let a DC with a birthday hand out treats to be taken home. If they didn't the DC would have to do it by the school gate and would be bound to miss some of the class. I wouldn't like to take the shine off a birthday child's day -I prefer to smile, ask him about his birthday plans and wish him happy returns of the day. It is a kindness.

Sidge · 30/09/2008 21:05

My DD2 can't have sweets, biscuits, cakes or chocolate. I hope this isn't something they do at her school (she's just started reception) or she's going to feel very left out

Friendlypizzaeater · 30/09/2008 21:05

It was my LO's b'day a couple of weeks ago - I sent in 30 little boxes of raisins (Yr 1)all the kids where happy with them ....

Nemoandthefishes · 30/09/2008 21:06

in ds nursery class they used to do this but letters have been sent out in reception saying this is not allowed anymore

cheesesarnie · 30/09/2008 21:06

LynetteScavo i agree about the gelatin thang.dd and ds1 eat meat but ds2 is veggie.i dont want them munching cow bones infront of me or him.

also ds2 had an intolerance to cows milk so what if when he starts school they give out sweets-hed have choice of something that makes his bum run or boiled bones.wow what a choice.

p.s)get little cross when people assume dc with bad teeth=too many sweets or juice in bottles etc.dd has had to have filling etc but has good diet and only had water or milk from bottle/beaker.

pointydog · 30/09/2008 21:10

s'ok abbey. I've not got it infor you. I'm very easy-going you know. Chuck us some chocolate buttons

Original poster
LynetteScavo · 30/09/2008 21:10

Oh, Friendlypizzaeater - I would have been impressed.

Of course the kids liked them - just like the time DS got a packet of sunflower seeds to grow instead of a party bag full of sweets.

But AbbeyA - it was the teacher handing out the sweets, not the child. Mostly DS doesn't even know who the sweets are actually from.

OP posts:
lilolilmanchester · 30/09/2008 21:56

I'm all for healthy eating, but parties & school fair days etc are the exception in our family. Most families in our school send in a little something for birthdays. I've avoided gelatine because of vegetarians, lollies (tho happy for mine to have the occastional lolly) and nuts for obvious reasons. But mini chocolate bars ain't going to kill a child and they will soon be old enough to buy what they want when you're not looking. Healthy eating = educated balance in our house.

foxinsocks · 30/09/2008 21:59

I love sweets. I can add this to the reasons why working full time is crap. I used to steal at least half of all the sweets they came out with.

handlemecarefully · 30/09/2008 22:01

I think it's harmless

Original poster
LynetteScavo · 30/09/2008 22:15

Tell me about it lilolil - DS1 has been buying 3 kitkats every day after school to eat on the way home.(ON special offer aparently)

I found about 10000000 wrappers in his top drawer - I mean, did he think I would never put any of his pants away????

OP posts:
PigeonQV · 30/09/2008 22:20

Oh this is such a farking nightmare for me.

I HATE it. HATE IT. With an ABSOLUTE passion.

Why do the have to hand out sweets? It's almost reaching 'party bag' status.

My DD has been so upset by this stupid and thoughtless "bit of fun" before now. Quite frankly it's frickin dangerous if someone gives her sweets (namely chocolate). It's not like hte kids will die if they dont hand out sweets.

Yet every time, kids queue up, sweets are all handed out. Cept for my DD, who is excluded every single damned time. Then she gets quietly given a box of raisins, or, maybe a pear wrapped in a paper towel while all the other chilren indulge.

Oh yes, it's a barrel of fucking laughs.

NOT.

lilolilmanchester · 30/09/2008 22:25

PigeonQV - is your DD allergic to chocolate? if so, can see it's a nightmare. Can she eat other sweets? If so, ask the teacher to have a quiet word. I'm sure most parents would oblige if they knew. But banning it isn't entirely fair either.

singersgirl · 30/09/2008 22:27

I do think it seems harmless, but when it's your child who can't eat them it's miserable. DS1 has had asthma and nosebleeds since Sunday after well-meaning cousins bought him pick 'n' mix on Sunday. The sweets won't kill him, but you feel terribly mean constantly trying to take them away. I try to trade them for chocolate, which doesn't give him asthma.

So I don't like the policy either, and it does go against the whole healthy eating/no crisps or chocolate biscuits in lunch boxes thing.

My kids are never in school on their birthdays anyway - it's August - so we don't have to reciprocate.

PigeonQV · 30/09/2008 22:29

Teachers know. They have her epipen in a box on standby. She's allergic to nuts. Because the teachers cant verify the ingredients they wont, quite rightly, allow her to be given anything.

Many other parents are well aware of DD's allergies, they just happen to not give a flying fuck, as long as their child is okay. One of DD's close friends' dad kept giving his DD a snickers bar to eat on the way home, knowing that DD had a peanut allergy, and knowing that they often 'shared' their treats together, and also hugged each other alot.

You cant really compete with ignorance or stupidness. It doesnt even come close to being "fair".

AbbeyA · 30/09/2008 22:29

It depends on how they do it, I let the DC hand them out. The whole point is that it has nothing to do with the school, it is like handing out party invitations-often done through the school but nothing to do with them. I wouldn't actually like to ban it-it gets very officious, it would also please half the parents and alienate the other half. Much better to leave well alone! I am very keen on chocolate buttons pointy dog -sometimes they let me have a packet!

NotAnOtter · 30/09/2008 22:31

schools should not allow it lynette end of

if you wanna treat your kid go ahead - dont impose your traditions on others

AbbeyA · 30/09/2008 22:34

Do you want to start a riot NotAnOtter!
I don't think you can have read the fruit thread about food and personal liberty!!
A school would be very silly to get involved IMO.

elliott · 30/09/2008 22:34

I don't think it should be allowed either. (gosh I'm in a real bah humbug mood tonight!)
ds2 has already brought home at least 3 packs of sweets since he started school. It wasn't like this at ds1's old school.
I think it sends out all the wrong messages and always causes an argument with ds1...

PigeonQV · 30/09/2008 22:34

Quite right NAO.

lilolilmanchester · 30/09/2008 22:39

I can see how awkward it is for you PigeonQV. I think if that happened in one of my DC's classes (and it hasn't) I'd think about alternatives, such as mini rubbers/balloons/mini bouncy balls costing the same as mini choc bars. I agree it's tough and unfair when a child gets left out and hopefully people reading this will be more sensitive if there are children with similar allergies in their DCs' classes. But I wouldn't not send in chocolate because it's unhealthy. We're talking tiny amounts max 30 - 35 times a year.