Do I sound mean?

[Bellabutterfly2016]

So last Sept my dd was 3. I organised a Party for her at a local venue - her plus 9 friends, softplay, games, cake, tea and party bags - £12.99 each. Not tonnes of money but enough plus cake and party bags and prizes etc etc........

3 of the kids were siblings and we had invites to all 3 parties (happening to fall before September, disco, softplay and a bbq party) but the other 6 either didn't have parties or if they did have, didn't invite dd.

We've been talking about it tonight as it's my Mums 60th so been talking about Nanny's party (it's hers this weekend) and shes asking "about her party".

She also goes to nursery 4 days a week but has had no party invites, play dates but nothing for a birthday.

My partner is of the opinion we should put the money in dd's bank rather than entertain other people's kids! My daughter thinks she's having a party! The 3 invites we got last year they didn't have parties this year as their Dad lost his job.

I feel mean as my dd loves parties but then see my partners point of view aswell.

What would you do?

IME, people tend to start having parties for the dc's friends (as opposed to parents inviting their friends round, who happen to have small children) once they start school.
Pre-school, most folk tend to invite Grandparents, maybe Aunts / Uncles and cousins - and, in some cases where there is a close friend, then family friend - round for a tea party at home.
Why not do that?
She will have a party, you won't be paying out loads of money, and neither you nor dh will feel miffed she hasn't been invited to a reciprocal party.

Good plan I think family tea party is the way forward and I'll send cakes into Nursery so she can share with her friends!