Is this acceptable?

[Ningnang2000]

DD really wants a build a bear party but I am not made of money so can only really afford for her to have 5 friends and her sister.

There are 12 girls in her class. So i'm thinking of inviting 5 girls of dds choice to build a bear and then on another date ask all the girls over for a play date but stress that it is not a party and no presents or games. They can go out to the rope swing in the woods or the park.

Do you think this is ok or does it feel like an A party and a B party? This year only one girl has had a party for all the girls and it seems like smaller ones or none at all is the way others are going. The problem I have is that dd is between friend groups so i'd lie to involve everyone but still give dd what she wants for her birthday.

I think it's too much like an A party and a B party. There's no need to invite all the girls for a later play date that's "not a party" because it obviously is a sop for not being invited to the bear party.

Another solution would be to have one of those DIY build a bear parties at home or in a hall nearby.

There are kits for sale and they're very good...you get the bear "skins" the stuffing and the heart for inside....they lace up at the back so no sewing involved.

www.bemybear.com/bears-and-friends/10-kits.html

They have various sizes available and prices start quite low

I would just do the bear party, no need for a second party. I think it does sound a bit like an A and B party.

It is normal for the whole class type parties to tail off by the end of KS1. I think the last one we held was for the twins seventh birthday.

I'd avoid the second event, or if you do have it, don't talk about it until well after the birthday bear party has happened, so that it's not associated with a birthday in any way at all.

Thanks for the opinions. She's now decided she wants her cousins for the bear party which i'm much happier with. I might have some of her pals round for pizza and strictly on the Saturday night. The problem is she is between friend groups as she is being actively pushed out by the mother of one of the girls on her core group from nursery which make this a bit akward.

That sounds lovely. I bet pizza and Strictly will go down a storm. We had 11x 8 and 9 year olds for film, craft and pizza and it worked surprisingly well. We broke up the film with pizza, which I think was more successful than the previous year when we did pizza first.