Worried about my son who can’t find anywhere to live.

[justacastle]

(nc for this)
DS finished university and has spent 18 months applying for jobs (450+). A few interviews who say they recruited internally or need someone with more experience (that old chestnut). Most just never reply. We live in London.

He finally gets a job but it’s in Oxfordshire. The company will let him stay at their accommodation (usually for customers) for a maximum of two weeks.

He cannot find any accommodation after this time. He has tried spare room app but when he gets a response people are asking for females only or more often there is no reply. He messages them a couple more times but nothing.

He doesn’t drive but willing to walk/cycle. He does have T1 diabetes so that is a consideration with distance.

He then put an ‘I’m looking for’ ad another site and a woman contacted him to say that, following throat surgery, she would be renting out her 2 bed house and moving in with family. It looked amazing and the woman said that the bills & council tax. A 25 minute walk to work. Paid the holding fee and arranged viewing for Sunday (he starts work on Monday).

DS was excited about job & house finally the months of angst were coming to an end.

So this morning he received an email from the lady saying that the rental company (?) wanted an extra £750 deposit before they would let him view the property. She said that she would pay £500 but he would need to pay another £250.

DS asked who this company was (not found on companies house) and their contact details so he could discuss it with them. She replied that they ’do not speak to prospective tenants’.

She also sent him her passport details by email as proof of her identity. Trouble was that the Passport had a spelling mistake in her name 🙄 🚩

Bank notified & they’re dealing with it.

Big problem is now DS is starting work on Monday but will have nowhere to live by the end of the month. As it’s quite a tourist area the Airbnbs and bed & breakfasts are thousands. He’s on the list at local estate agents but he has no salary history yet. They are really out of his price range but we’ll help him.

Just as an aside UC have paid him nothing for months, just the odd £15 here and there.

He’s desperately worried that he will lose his job.

Any ideas folks?
I’m so sorry for the long post.

Depends where in London though. Getting across london, depending where they live, can be over an hour -ometimes more. Then train buses out to that village.

From where I am in london, it would take me three hours in one direction to get there.

It also isn't oxford city and the post has been very clear about that

To be honest he really really needs to learn to drive.

Not being able to drive is one of the biggest factors that limits getting work. In the 18m he was looking did he not think to learn to drive? I know it can be expensive but it really is worth it

Look on the Trainline out of Oxford at the towns and places from where he could commute

banbury in one direction Leamington spa ( uni living town) it’s only 35 minutes on the train between Leamington and Oxford

try local Facebook pages for accommodation

Having a car in Oxford is a nightmare by design, it’s not an advantage

The trouble is he would be open to being scammed, like he nearly was the first time. Would have to be very careful.

Banbury has this place close to the station , that’s for 29 nights on booking dot com

Just looked on spare rooms for Leamington spa and there are a few rooms near station around £650 a month in HMO
take a look

Yep, an ebike (Decathlon have them at reasonable prices) will make a long cycle commute much easier on him - as long as you pedal gently, the motor will keep you going at a steady speed. You just have to be strict about getting theft insurance, taking the battery off when you park it, and locking up somewhere secure (if possible) with a really good motorcycle lock.

I really dont want to ne a negative Nelly because your ds has done amazingly persevering.

But you are right to be concerned about medical licenses and the timescale to sort it.

My ds has a medical license and they take 3 months to even read and process any medical document sent to them (confirmed as we went through MP in the end and DVLA gave timescales in the response)

Or travel by taxi from a nearby town?

Has he looked at Cholsey? There is a train and bus and also i know many cycle to Wallingford

So hard for our kids these days OP. When I moved to London in 1992 after graduating from the hills up north I lodged with an Italian family. I had a room and was welcome to eat with them etc., suited me well. Not sure how easy something like that would be to find.

As an empty nester I’d consider renting a room to a decent human being who needed a break in the world, so may be worth him advertising locally.

Might sound daft but I’d contact the local vicar. I let two people who found themselves without a roof over their head stay here for two weeks between homes. They had come here on the Ukrainian homes scheme and the people they were staying with sold their house quicker than anticipated.

I don’t know anything about T1, but would he trust himself on a moped with a couple of lessons under his belt? Might get him mobile without relying on public transport or cycling.

Best of luck to him.

Youth hostel or backpackers hotel? He'd be sharing a bedroom but it is probably the cheapest option.

He should approach the council too, I know a single male with no medical problems is a low priority but sometimes it happens.

He literally has a terminal illness that he is managing 24/7, thats a medical problem!

A terminal illness?

Oh don’t be so silly

Should have said that I would never advertise, but I’d help someone out. That was the vicar comment 😅, the local church contacted families to ask if anyone could help the couple who were stuck between moves.

Realistically he will get nothing sorted in the next 40 hours over a weekend.

So just be thinking short term for now. As in very very short term.

Dont sign up for anything long term until he’s passed his probation

Yes, he has type one diabetes, it is considered a terminal illness as without treatment you will die, with very very good treatment we still typically die prematurely as we cannot out run it forever.

Source where diabetes T1 is regarded amongst medics as a terminal illness please (and your arse is not a source)

I have type 1 and I know exercise can be hard to adjust into but I wouldn't let it hold him back. I've walked an hour to work at times over my career. He'd just need to make sure he's taking lots of glucose tablets with him at first and adjusting his insulin to accommodate. If it's regular, probably reducing his long acting would work best and less insulin with meals before the walk. If he has a pump, he could speak to his diabetes team. Mine has an ease off function for exercise but I'm not sure about others.

Edit to add on the license front, for T1 it's really a formality that they ask for medical input. It's very quick from my experience and doctors don't really ever raise any issues because it's a common illness and as long as you're aware of hypos etc. they don't want to block you from living a normal life :-)

He could stay at YHA Streatley on Thames (in Streatley) whilst he finds somewhere more suitable. Its only 10km from Wallingford, which he could easily cycle.

Would he consider doing a bike cbt course and riding a 125cc? Much much cheaper and quicker than learning to drive a car and opens up way more options. It's what I do!

Can he get a low cc motor scooter? That would open up options not on bus routes, and he doesn’t need a full driving license (just a provisional).

My son got scammed (well I did really because I sent him the money) when he was desperately searching for accommodation.
They did the same thing coming back for more money at the last minute
There are so many scammers out there!
Hope your son sorts something out soon

I wish people would read the thread!

He is not working in Oxford its Wallingford a market town in Oxfordshire.

If it was Oxford itself it wouldn't be a problem. Stop giving suggestions like Swindon or Leamington Spa they are completely unsuitable due to transport considerations.