Thread 56 – Covid GCSE Cohort – Spring 26 – Yr 4 Uni and Graduates

[crazycrofter]

The old thread has filled up and no one noticed - I think we're missing @oblomov26 sharp eyes!

I've tried to tag in everyone I can think of, but apologies to anyone I've missed!
@shimy @endlessdistraction @justherewithmypopcorn @mummyinbeds @aslockton @oubliettebravo @craggyrat @anothernewname460 @ealingwestmum @ewwsprouts @seeline @piggywaspushed @nctdn @icanbewhatiwant @comefromaway @heifer @kingscotestaff @delphigirl @zebracat @cantonet @socks1107 @blinkbonny @anneofcleavage

Welcome @Echobelly my - my DS is also history grad

Before I met DH I had never had a relationship that lasted longer thsn 3 dates and I never imagined I would get married. We met briefly late 20s but not to date, then again when I was 32. We started going out then, he proposed 4 months later on Xmas Day and we got married a year less a day from our first date when I was 33. It's our 25th next month.

I don't want DS to marry or have kids for a while yet - and not just because I don't like the GF v much even though it has now been a year...!!

I'm sorry to hear your DD is no longer with her BF @crazycrofter

My brother got married at 18 and had his first child at 20. So my parents were grandparents at 43!! And my Grandparents were great grandparents at 63. My brother’s sons are now 37, 35 and 33. None of them have married or had children even though all are in long term relationships. His eldest has been with his girlfriend 18 years - both are London architects. I think the generation of getting married and having children young has disappeared.

Hello @Echobelly I have similar concerns about my DD who has just finished the first year of a history degree.

DD is home for the summer but she has left some stuff behind (ADHD brain strikes again) so off we go again later, luckily it's only about 25 miles away. DS is out at one of his volunteering roles setting up for an event this weekend in the rain.

@crazycrofter sorry I cross posted yesterday and missed your update about DD, I'm glad she's coming to terms with it but remember you saying she was hoping to settle down with him. I was dumped by my second BF age 21 and was devastated, with hindsight it wouldn't have worked out but boy is it hard at the time.

One of DD’s school friends has a daughter who is starting school in September! One of my school friends has a 1 year old granddaughter (I’m 50).

I met DH at the start of my PhD. We were both 23. I was 28 when DD was born, and 30 when DS was born. All our friends thought we were mad. But they’re jealous now we have adult children and they’re still in the middle of the school years.

My cousin who is only 18 months older than me has several grandchildren, the eldest is taking GCSEs this summer, she and her DCs all married and had children very young and developed their careers later. But she went almost straight from parenting to grandparenting and is now doing elderly parent care as well so she’s never had much of a break from caring responsibilities.

I had my kids at the same ages as you @OublietteBravo- I celebrated my 30th when ds was 5 days old! It seems about right to me, but dd is adamant she won’t start a family til at least 30.

Thanks for the thoughts re dd and bf @craggyrat@EffortlesslyDistracted. This is her third boyfriend and she struggled when the others ended so I’m a bit worried, especially as it coincides with moving back home, where she doesn’t have friends (we moved here when she went to uni) and starting work.

I guess just keep an eye out for rebounds @crazycrofter (I made that mistake after No2). Not that I would have listened to my parents at that age. But I always did have a difficult relationship with my mum (ongoing). It strikes me that your DD will make friends wherever she goes and the new job could be the start of that, or church. Fingers crossed.

Thanks @EffortlesslyDistracted- you’re right, I’m sure she’ll make new friends quickly.

They thought you were mad as in young or old parents ?!

They thought we were too young, and should establish careers first before having children. I don’t regret doing it our way at all!

Wow I don’t think that was young. I initially read it because they thought you were old!!

It’s funny because it’s very cultural isn’t it. We used to live in a very working class town in the Black Country and I was telling my hairdresser that my sister was expecting her first - at nearly 28. The hairdresser was shocked and said ‘Did she mean to leave it so late?’!!

The age of having a first child is remarkably stable in my family. My grandmother had my dad at 28, my mum had me at 27, I had DD at 28. My grandmother and mother were considered old, I was considered young. It’s funny how perceptions change.

I had my first at 35, twins at 40 & my last at 42.
My mum had me at 24 & 4 by 30.
But both my grandparents had children very late in those times. My paternal Grandmother was in her late 30's but told everyone she was late 20's including my Grandpa ( he found her real age out in his 70's).
My maternal grandmother who was I think in her late 30's went on to have 3 children in Ireland. Her father was very attached to her & wouldn't let her Marry earlier. But she went on to marry an absolute sweetheart..One child wasnt quite right, but is very bright & has always been cared for within the family.

My maternal grandmother had my mum very late too (40ish), I suspect an accident. Her siblings were much older than her, born when DGM was in her 20s.

@crazycrofter
Hope dd is ok re the ex and the moving back home bit. Actually I've thought about it and the moving back home bit after Notts may be a shock. I know that ds1 finds our quiet town very boring after Nottingham.

My history is very similar to @craggyrat - no long term relationships, then Dh when I was 28, ds1 @ 31, and ds2 @ 35, with a miscarriage inbetween.

Ds1 is off on a 2 week hike in Scotland, then going to Kyrgyzstan. We are off to the Algarve this week for the Black and White festival. Can't wait. Ds1 isn't even going to his Nottingham Graduation ceremony, as yet another christian friend is getting married that day. My mum and I both wanted to go to his Graduation ceremony, but he's totally not interested. Actually he says the teaching at Nottingham re Accountancy was poor. But he loved the Uni life. I am beyond thrilled that he has blossomed and thrived there. He lived life to the full at Notts, I can assure you!

He's now been confirmed that he's got his assumed/given place working for P*C in London Bridge, in september. He's going to move into a house for 6 boys, in Elephant and Castle I think they are looking. He needs to sit his last 3 papers and then he'll be Qualified by next July. He seems worringly over-committed to the church, but he is quite obsessional in his nature. I haven't met his girlfriend yet, but she sounds nice, it does seem worringly serious very quickly.

Anyway, end of an Era! These 4 years have been a blast. Thanks to you all, for the ride!! I am thrilled with how well ds1 has done. It's just ds2 I now have to focus on. He's a different card, so lovely, so laid back he's horizontal, very little self-drive sadly. I just need to get him into a Uni or job (easier said than done, I think he's deluded and thinks some sort of amazing Apprenticeship is going to fall into his lap with no effort - and he'll be the next physio at ....say Chelsea Football club!!). But anyway, then my parenting job will be done. Phew.

Not that I worry about such shit. I'm an over-thinker, not a worrier. I'll ponder it all this weekend as I'm lying on a sun lounger in the Algarve, at the 'Black and White festival', with a cocktail in my hand!

Enjoy your holiday @Oblomov26 !

Your ds1 has done brilliantly, you must be relieved and proud (even if you don't get to enjoy the graduation ceremony..)! Hope he enjoys PwC! I used to love going down to the London office when I worked there. And he'll have a huge peer group, so it will be very sociable. Where will his gf be?

My ds is also going to Kyrgyzstan in July for 3 weeks! Dd's DBS has finally arrived so she'll be starting her job imminently, which is a great relief given her lack of money... She's still planning to go back to Nottingham regularly for weekends, as she has lots of friends there, so i hope being at home won't be too lonely. And she's working in Birmingham, so she'll be able to see the friends she has there after work. I'm a bit worried about the hour plus drive each way to work, but hopefully she'll cope.

Good luck with ds2, I'm sure he'll find his way, with your support.

@Piggywaspushed when are ds2's interviews?

Lovely to see your update @Oblomov26 - have a great holiday and well done to your DS1 and good luck for the next stage for him.

DS is poorly at the moment with gastroenteritis - not see him this ill since he was little. And I'm trying to function at work with little sleep...

He didn't go to the one in Bournemouth. He did, however, attend an online one in Falmouth! He has an interview on the 29th but that's a stopgap school job that he can do whilst doing unpaid media work for a local football club. He seems to prefer that option.

It will be cheaper living at home @Piggywaspushed! Hope he gets something soon!

Dd has already planned her budget, and it includes £300pm on teeth straightening ‘Invisalign’ braces! I pointed out that she wouldn’t be able to afford that if she was renting 😂 It’s only for a year but if she signs up I guess she’s not moving out for a while!

Sorry to hear about Ds’ illness @craggyrat - sounds nasty. Ds had D&V two weeks back as well; he had to miss a trip to Take That’s Circus tour with us, which was a shame as I don’t remember the last time he got sick.

Thanks @crazycrofter such a shame for your DS! I thought it might be river pollution as he ran the Knaresborough bedrace last week - he is in a photo in the Yorkshire Post - exciting! And they do a river crossing but he wasn't v well last week before this and I feel a bit off now as well. Lovely!

@Oblomov26 Congratulations to your DS on finishing uni and moving on to a city job. I grew up in Nottm, so I am very fond of the city and spent many a Sunday enjoying Wollaton Park and the university's lakes. I hope you are enjoying Portugal. Are they World Cup mad out there too?

@craggyrat I hope your DS feels better soon. Any news from the military medical?

@Piggywaspushed Fingers crossed for the Falmouth interview. Was that media/journalism work? It is a lovely part of the world, my mum grew up there.

Yes, trainee journalist. As ever, he has had the interview and heard nothing back.

He actually is really keen on the press officer role at our local football club. It's me that feel like it's unpaid servitude.

I was wondering when the results come out and when do we find out what degree classification they got? Is it the same day for everyone at Birmingham or do different departments release their results different dates?