Thread 56 – Covid GCSE Cohort – Spring 26 – Yr 4 Uni and Graduates

[crazycrofter]

The old thread has filled up and no one noticed - I think we're missing @oblomov26 sharp eyes!

I've tried to tag in everyone I can think of, but apologies to anyone I've missed!
@shimy @endlessdistraction @justherewithmypopcorn @mummyinbeds @aslockton @oubliettebravo @craggyrat @anothernewname460 @ealingwestmum @ewwsprouts @seeline @piggywaspushed @nctdn @icanbewhatiwant @comefromaway @heifer @kingscotestaff @delphigirl @zebracat @cantonet @socks1107 @blinkbonny @anneofcleavage

I couldn't not comment on the horrible attitudes your dd has encountered. I'm so sorry she has had to encounter that. I honestly don't know what is happening in the world. It's like we have gone backwards.

Back when I was at school in the 1980's my best friend was mixed but she was very white passing and because she went to school away from where she lived no-one at school except me and one other girl had met her parents. (her mum was half Indian).

Until one day someone saw her in town with her mum and her brother (who took after their mum more) and from that day onwards the p word name calling started. I didn't totally appreicate back then how much that would have affected her.

That’s awful @ealingwestmum- I’m so sorry to hear what your dd’s had to put up with 😢 She must be very resilient, but she shouldn’t have to be. Is it a bit better in Belfast, in comparison to Dublin?

Thank you @AnneOfCleavage , @Comefromaway, @crazycrofter for your kind comments, I really didn't mean to create a downer and overall, her experience of studying there has been overwhelmingly positive. And DH's extended family both south and north have really enjoyed getting to know her. It's all just symptomatic of the times we're in isn't it?

The good thing that's come out of the last few years is that my husband has finally realised how inappropriate coming out with daft stuff like 'but she's not even that brown...' is, and then not understanding why he's in the dog house for doubling down :) He's finally got it, and in his defence, I never really referred to the slurs early marriage as it was a normalised part of growing up.

We're not naive to think it'll never happen @crazycrofter and the north has its own challenges and history, but so far, all our experiences has been overwhelmingly positive. People ask, really ask why she's there, what brings us to their region when DH and I visit, and seem to take it as a compliment that she has chosen to live the next part of her life there. It is small, insular and does have less diversity but still somehow does not come across as racist - just more direct and inquisitive.

There is such a clear difference between innocent ignorance and malice. Intent is key to everything. I personally never have a problem answering the 'but no, where are you really from' but I can understand those that do find it offensive. I'm just happy when people engage sensibly than have all this rage that's fuelled by the small minded few.

You haven’t created a downer at all @ealingwestmumIt’s been a very interesting and enlightening discussion esp with highlighting the prejudices of our closest neighbours. I am reminded of it as my DSis went to NI uni back in the early 2000s and I remember her telling me there were streets she could never walk down although that I believe was more linked to not being Catholic but obv she was English too so guess that could have come into it.

@ComefromawayMy best friend at Primary was mixed too and we ended up at different secondary schools as she moved house and she was bullied so badly and she was pretty white too. Like your friend, her brothers favoured their (Japanese) mum. I never even noticed her being mixed as she was just my lovely best friend.

Will catch up properly later, but just want to say what a lovely group you all are on here 😊

Hi everyone and so lovely to see you @ealingwestmum , thank you for your kind comments! I'm so delighted to hear about your dds next steps but I am sorry to hear what she has faced in dublin. NI sounds like an exciting next step and she has done so brilliantly to get such a coveted grad job. All the very best to her!
DS's interview went well he thinks, and has been told he will hear on tuesday whether he has it or not. He was one of 5 second interviewees. BUT he has also been told there he has been put forward by an agency for freelance work for a massive international company as a junior surveyor (a step above graduate surveyor) either on a project also starting on tuesday in Dundee, or on a project out of norfolk two weeks later, and they are very keen and will confirm early next week. So he might be in the ridiculous position of being on a flight to Dundee to join a vessel on Tuesday while also being phoned and offered a job in Liverpool the same day. Equally he could be told he didn't get the job in liverpool and the massive company don't need him after all. He is understandably a bit unsettled! Fingers crossed something works out for him, one way or another.

Wow @Delphigirlthats exciting and a little bit stressful! He must be good! What would his preference be - the freelance work?

It pays a lot more but freelance so less certain but the co is tip top so he will likely get more freelance work out of it - and it will be great experience - but he loved Liverpool and there is something to be said for taking a full time job and settling somewhere for a few years…
so he doesn’t know!
He of course may not end up being spoilt for choice at all which is the most likely result 🤣

Tricky! I think if it was my ds I’d be hoping for just one offer to make things simple 😂 Fingers crossed one of them comes through for him! On the other hand, getting two offers would be a huge confidence boost!

I think if he gets offered the Dundee start on 1st Sept this weekend he will take it - its a 4 week contract which could be extended. Then if he is offered the Liverpool job he will take it but say he is not available to start until 1 oct because he has taken a last minute short term contract with GreatCo. They should be impressed by his willingness to work and of course they will be getting someone with 4 weeks more excellent experience than they thought. That is the current thinking. Win-win. If he doesn't get offered Liverpool he hopes to continue freelancing via this agency but may continue to apply for permanent jobs. What is a bit less clear is what if he gets offered a 6 week contract starting mid Sept for GreatCo, plus the liverpool job, on Tuesday. I think then he will have to pick one and ditch the other.
I will keep you all posted!!!

@Delphigirl well that all sounds amazing for your DS - what a great position to be in!

@ealingwestmum lovely to hear from you but so sorry to hear of some of the attitudes your DD has to face.

@EffortlesslyDistracted well done on the lifeguarding for your DD and to hear she is joining rec squad. I still miss poolside! DS swims with Masters still x3 but doesn't compare with them.

Echoing everyone's comments about @ealingwestmum! And good luck to @Delphigirl, fingers crossed for a pleasant dilemma!

Yes, same from me too @ealingwestmum , we experience different challenges in life and it’s easy to be unaware of the things that don’t directly affect our own families so thank you for sharing.

It’s raining <faints> DS is at work, DD and friend are off to Victorious Festival (with waterproofs) and I’m staying at home to do governor work. DH can’t go anywhere much with his broken arm, he is back at work but DS and I are having to drive him there and back and this is likely to be the case for weeks. I am feeling a bit stir crazy as I can’t remember when I last had the house to myself, usually he does a lot of cycling in the evenings and at weekends. Even my day off on Friday has been taken over as DD is usually at home (works Friday from 6pm and likes a lazy day beforehand) and DS has changed one of his volunteering days away from Friday. Aaargh.

I’m with you @NCTDN, such a lovely lot, you folk on here ☺️

My dc were supposed to be at Big Church festival this weekend but it’s been cancelled due to a tragic accident 😢 They’re not back yet as they’re with friends and I’ve not heard from Ds, but dd seemed quite shaken yesterday when she messaged me. Ds’ friend’s mum was on the scene and called the ambulance. It must have been a traumatic experience 😬

I read it in the news and thought of a few of you on here @crazycrofter, I am not surprised your DS is shaken up.

I wondered if any of the young people here were there too, a family I know were there and have messaged to say they are OK, but it is so sad.

Oh, how horrible. Sorry to hear this.

I was shocked to hear about the tragic accident at the church festival. Sorry to hear about those who were there and quite shaken up by it all.

Oh, goodness, I read about that too. I'm sorry to learn that people here were affected, it must be awful.

DD mentioned over dinner tonight that her passport had been returned, but without any letter explaining next steps. It turns out that this was because there was a shiny new au-pair visa stuck in it, which she hadn't noticed when flipping through it!! So, she will be off in mid October, a week or so after DS starts uni.

@ealingwestmum So sorry your DD has experienced such vile comments. Things are framed/explained in so many ways but to my mind the individual still makes their choice in the moment to be obnoxious. She must really love Ireland and the good people.

@craggyrat Gosh just watching a report on the festival on the news. Utterly tragic.

@Delphigirl Many permutations but they all sound positive. Hope it all comes together the way he would prefer.

The thunderstorms have come while we have part of our roof off. The plastic sheeting kept most of it out...

Having said she was definitely not going to work in a coffee shop ever again, DD has got a job in a coffee shop. She will cover a minimum of 16 hours to sit alongside her part time masters but the manager said she can work up to five days a week. DD will see what the schedule is like for uni before committing to too much.
I can now put my efforts into helping DS decide what direction he wants to go in. He's got as far knowing the corporate world isn't for him but isn't sure what is 🤔

Hello everyone 👋

I’m finally catching up on this thread. I’m on holiday with DH, DD (& BF), and DS. It feels a bit weird being out of the country whilst the whole back to school thing is in full swing. And I’m still a bit surprised that they want to go on holiday with us - by their age I was definitely actively avoiding holidays with my parents!

It’s so nice to hear how all the DC are getting on. Don't those cancelled GCSEs of 2020 seem a long time ago now?!

Don’t they just @OublietteBravo I was in school today myself (governor) and it is weird to no longer have any family involvement just DD going back to uni soon. We are off on a family holiday next week too, we have settled on city breaks or short UK breaks as our best option for getting them to come with us (neither ever really liked pool/beach holidays after about age 10). I stopped going with my parents after O levels.

Our last family holiday was when DS was 15 and DD was 17. After GCSE/ A levels they both wanted to do their own thing with friends. I still took one of them away for an Easter city break up up until 17 years old. I miss family holidays, but love a holiday with just me and DH more!