Thread 55 - Covid GCSE Cohort - Autumn 25 - Yr 4 Uni and Graduates

[Oblomov25]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.
Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp
Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.
Previous thread 54:
Thread 54

DS2 is 22 today!

His birthday post included a speeding fine...

Oh no @Piggywaspushed. Happy Birthday to him though.

We are having our first foreign holiday without the DCs. Was a bit nervous about it but it is turning out to be very relaxing.

@Piggywaspushed That is rotten.

@EndlessDistraction I was dreading our first holiday without the children. We would have to speak to each other!! We had a blast and loved every minute of it. We went to the Croatian Islands and Dubrovnik. We had no one moaning about wifi speeds, constantly asking for food, or what we are doing and at what time. We relaxed, chatted for hours, wandered around the city until midnight, slept in, and just enjoyed each other's company. The children were miffed that they weren't missed and we had had a great time without them!

Ironically, they (DC) both go away together at least one a year. They have a great time too.

Dreadful timing. But happy birthday to him.

I'm hoping he can do a course and not get points.

He was going to Headingley at the time so in an unfamiliar place. Not that this would make me do 40 in a City Centre...

Oh dear @piggywaspushed- hopefully it’s the only one (I had three arrive in the first week of Jan a couple of years back!). He’s not in his first two years of driving is he?! Hope he’s had a lovely birthday anyway!

Enjoy your holiday @EndlessDistraction! We did it last year and I agree with @Aslockton -it was so pressure-free and relaxed! Ds and dd also went away together last year, to see their aunt and uncle in Spain,

I don't think he is - but it's 3 points for 40 in a 30 so he'd be OK.

@Aslockton yes that was the fear - what would we talk about! The first evening we thrashed out some financial stuff we haven't wanted them to overhear (no empty nest at home for us and a small house, DH will
shortly be receiving a small legacy and we need to decide what to use it for plus pensions, retirement etc talk). But since then just chatting and companiable silence, reading, strolling, swimming etc (we're somewhere warm). Only two people to decide where to eat, when to eat and what to do, no bickering and HALF THE COST. It's got really expensive since they started drinking alcohol.

Happy birthday to your DS @piggywaspushed and commiserations on the ticket.

@EndlessDistraction have a fab holiday! We had exactly the same feeling before going without DS and it was such a good holiday!!

Nothing much to report here. Work still rubbish, back still rubbish and DS still determined to have his extra year in C. The cost is still eye watering so probably yet another year where we wont get a holiday as will be helping to fund that if he chooses the Masters over the pgce as his wages this year wont be enough. Am sighing on the inside - and getting pretty annoyed on the outside!!

Happy birthday to DS @Piggywaspushedfor yesterday. Shame about the timing of the ticket. It should have a box that you tick for consideration on an awareness course - DH had 1st one last year! He didn’t initially tick the box but phoned up to change his mind and they allowed him to do the awareness course which he found v informative. He’s had advanced driving lessons and v aware but somehow missed a gantry sign saying 40 on a 50 stretch of motorway - we were yapping away going to visit DD at uni and neither of us noticed it. He was doing 46.

@EndlessDistraction we’ve just come back from holiday too. So relaxing and for once a week in the sun, not a city break visiting places and walking miles. We literally stayed close to the resort and recharged our batteries. We’ll def be returning as this was def more our speed at our stage of life 😁

Yes, I am hoping he was doing under 42 mph and will get a course.
I don't understand how the males in my family never spot bright yellow speed cameras!

@AnneOfCleavage same, we are in a hotel which we never really did with the DCs (they don't like pool/beach holidays and I wouldn't have enjoyed them much constantly having to keep an eye on them) we have always self catered or the occasional cruise but always packed in lots of sightseeing, which I do love but sometimes it is nice to just do very little. The beach and town are about 500m from the hotel here and that's as far as we've been.

Just touching base.
I'm dreading DD coming home after graduation - she has had no luck with jobs and she really doesn't cope well without routine and a plan.
She got an interview for a retail job in Norwich - it was only 8hrs/week, but she had a 2hr interview involving 2 group tasks (which she thoroughly enjoyed!), but there were 24 of them and she was unsuccessful. 24 interviewees for 1 job of 8 hours!!

Fir the sort of job she is interested in there are no graduate entry/schemes so it will just be an entry level/minimum wage to start with. If she can even get one of those.

We've got a family holiday booked for early June - DH and I go alone in September. It's bliss!
Trying to decide where to go for a long weekend for our 30th wedding anniversary in July.
Of course all this depends on there being aviation fuel.....

Good luck to your dd with the job hunting @seeline! What sort of work is she after? Would she rather stay in her uni town if she could find work there? It's a daunting thought, having them back isn't it? I'll be very glad not to have dd sitting in the kitchen all day, 'studying'/procrastinating though, and I'm also glad her job can't be done from home!

I had a text from dd last night saying how sad she is to be leaving Nottingham. I think she's a bit worried as she planned to visit her boyfriend there every weekend, but the new job will have some weekend work - possibly every other, but she's not sure. I'm hoping she is able to go back fairly regularly, as she needs social time. At least we're only just over an hour away though. Would be a nightmare if she'd gone somewhere like Edinburgh!

We found it a bit of an adjustment when DS came back last year even though he'd been back the previous summers, it felt different with being open ended even though we've never had an empty nest and the DCs are both homebirds. Fortunately he got his previous summer job back and was working weekends so we weren't all home on the same days, same with the PT job he has now, he gets his days off while we're at work and vice versa. The search goes on for full time work, he didn't get the one he interviewed for last week but did get some very positive feedback and has another interview next week. DD at uni is getting nowhere for PT or
summer jobs and is feeling the pinch a bit. It really is hard at the moment. She is applying absolutely everywhere she can think of.

Good news on the positive feedback @EndlessDistraction and good luck to him for next week's interview!

Hope dd finds a summer job soon!

We are going away without the kids next week (to Rhodes). I can’t wait! Although DD is sulking that she’s not coming. But leaving a 21 year old home alone is surely normal!

DD has now been in her job for 6 months. She’s passed her probation period (not a given - they have someone leaving tomorrow after only 3 months) and been given a 5% pay rise. So she’s pretty proud of herself right now.

Good luck to all the job hunters. It’s such a tough market at the moment.

@crazycrofter I think part of the problem is she isn't really sure exactly what she wants - 'something' in museums/galleries/cultural heritage. Could be in the museum, behind the scenes, marketing, outreach, education.....
She's happy to do a masters, but wants to find the type of work she's interested in first.
I think she'd happily stay in Norwich if she could find something, but as we're in London, there are more opportunities here. Having all 4 of us back home permanently is daunting!

So pleased to hear that some are having luck with jobs. Fingers crossed for everyone else 🤞

You’re not in Gran Canaria are you @EndlessDistraction? I remember another mnetter saying they were going, and that’s where we’ve come back from. I’d never been before but def want to return. Loved the climate too and half board at the hotel was such a treat.

Well done on your DD passing probation and getting a pay rise too 👏@OublietteBravo

All those saying re DC coming back home this summer, I totally get this too. Having had DD away for 3 years too it will be an adjustment having to share our (small) house again full time but this time as all adults. My DH has laid down rules that as all adults we will be sharing housework and cooking as we all work so all have to pull weight. Paying rent has also been discussed and wasn’t balked at nor was the sharing the cooking days but let’s see how it actually pans out.

Has she thought about an archives masters @seeline? My sister has worked in archives for nearly 20 years and her current role is in a 500 year old school, so very interesting from a historical point of view.

Dd will be working funny shifts, but I think if she's on an early I'll try to get her to share the cooking too @AnneOfCleavage . I'm not sure if we'll be charging her rent initially, as she really wants/needs to save up some money (she has nothing!). She's talking about getting married in a couple of years and wants to start saving for a house, so I think we'll hold off the rent on the understanding that she puts it aside. Ds has just opened a LISA for the same purpose...

Well done to dd @OublietteBravo !

@AnneOfCleavage yes we are! I don't think I've mentioned it elsewhere on MN. We've never been before either, did Fuerteventura once pre DCs but that's all. We are B&B but the breakfast buffet is enormous so filling up on that and eating out or having a picnic from the local shop to eat in the evenings.

Yes it was on this thread that I heard I wasn’t the only one going to Gran Canaria @EndlessDistractionso it was you then 😁 The breakfast was super substantial and very varied so I was full up not to need lunch. My DH on the other hand can always find room for lunch 😜 Being tall he doesn’t need to worry about his weight unlike his vertically challenged wife 😂

If you can get by without needing rent and DD is saving in a LISA then that’s great @crazycrofter
DD also had one of those and will open a normal ISA to save too once her student account expires - assume this summer. She’ll be earning much more than me but I’ll squirrel it away for her.
Married in 2years? I thought this was a fairly new boyfriend. Will she live with him first? Exciting adventure ahead for her though 🥰

Yes, he is relatively new @AnneOfCleavage but she seems very sure about him - we'll see though, as they're not engaged or anything yet. They're both Christians and wouldn't live together first. Dh and I didn't either and we were married when I was 23 so I guess it doesn't seem so unusual to me! Ds and girlfriend are thinking similarly... To be honest both partners are really lovely so I'll be pleased if they do work out. Does your dd's boyfriend live near home @AnneOfCleavage ?

That makes perfect sense then @crazycrofteresp as you were young when your married too. As they are both Christians they likely both have the same ethos - presumably your DS and his girlfriend are the same. I was brought up within the Church with the ethos of not being “unequally yoked” etc and only holding hands etc with the opp sex if you were prepared to marry them. It was therefore a shock when I got together with an “unbeliever” but my parents quickly realised he was perfect for me ( although they hated the fact I moved in with him quite quickly 😁- however if I’d married the first person I was close to I’d be in an abusive marriage and our church frowned upon divorce)

Both DH and I are now Humanists so follow all the British Values but without the religion part but we’re certainly not atheists. DD has just got a job in a CofE school and is quite happy to embrace their Christian ethos as we’ve always brought her up to be tolerant of any religion and to follow what she feels is right.
Her boyfriend lives locally so she is super excited to be moving back home so can see him a bit more… with the idea of possibly moving in after ECT is done (2yrs) and then buying a bigger place together if that all works out later on… and hopefully marriage as she is v traditional 🥰