Thread 55 - Covid GCSE Cohort - Autumn 25 - Yr 4 Uni and Graduates

[Oblomov25]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.
Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp
Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.
Previous thread 54:
Thread 54

@Shimyi applied for that Nuffield pain course. I had an email the next day with a 2 forms to fill in. I’m going for an assessment Tuesday. The course will start 2 weeks later. So that happened quickly! Though I get a feeling they may say I’m not in enough to pain to go on the course, as I manage it quite well, I don’t take pain killers as it’s not that bad, though I often need pain killers the day after Pilates. But I feel if I’m like this now (early 50’s) what will I be like in 10 years time, or 20 years if I live that long. So it would be good to get on top of it. Thanks for telling me about it.

@icanbewhatiwant So pleased to hear they've responded so quickly. Not being on permanet meds is definitely not a problem. Most in my class are not and I'm not as we use medication when experiencing a bad flare up. It goes both ways- If you're in too much pain, they might say you can't do the course, you have to be able to engage with the exercises, but definitely explain where all the pain is. I'm really excited for you. Like you i thought, if im in my 50s now & in so much pain, what does the future hold? but these exercises have been a game changer, I'm more positive about the future.

DS now has his mortgage offer in place and is ready to exchange next week.

The Estate Agent want to complete on the same day (with 8 days notice). He reckons all the chain is ready to go (4 in the chain) and is putting pressure on DS to make it happen. DS's solicitor has told the agent that DS has an investment fund maturing on 8th March (this is for 30k) that he needs to use towards the purchase price, so completion will be on 10th March. Estate Agent is now sending angry emails asking him if he can get the money early or borrow it from family as 'he is struggling to keep the chain together'. Like we have 30k lying around. DS is very stressed. He can exchange now, just not complete. The estate agent is just after closing the deal and getting commission. Not sure how people are getting removal companies with 8 days notice. DS does not even own a sofa or a bed!

Sorry for my rant!

@Aslockton Arrrgh! that's tough. Is this DS's dream house? dont know what the answer is £30k is not just going to magically materialise. March isn't too far away, hopefully the chain will wait till then.

@Aslockton this sounds so typically like every agent I have ever dealt with, pushing people to agree to things so they can get their commission quickly (just to be fair in case anyone here is an EA - Not All Estate Agents). Did they know about when he would have his money when he made his offer? Normally they check these things.
I hope it all gets sorted without any further stress.

Yes, @JustHereWithMyPopcorn he had to prove his funds: LISA, savings accounts, investment fund all screen shot with maturity date on etc. They are just interested in ball park figures (and commission) not detail.

Well that's even more ridiculous then! Sounds like they are just trying to bully a young first time buyer into taking another loan out to complete early just so he gets his commission quickly.

Hello! I found you again. It’s been ages since I last posted! Not much is really happening for us. Both DDs are at uni and work has been crazy busy. DD1 has started job hunting but no luck yet.

It’s exciting to see some DCs actually buying a house! How much deposit do they need? DD has some savings but not sure it’s enough for a deposit.

Good news here. DS exchanges today. His completion date is 13th March, so after his investment fund matures. He only found out last night at 6pm that exchange was today, so a mad panic to move money into the current account and buy buildings insurance (very much adulting!) Buildings insurance was £150, but when he made it buildings and contents (50k) the policy price went down to £130!

As for deposit , you can get a mortgage with 95% loan to value, so 5%. DS has had a stocks and shares LISA since he was 18. You can put 4k a year in and the government add 1k. So in the last 5 years he/we have paid in 20k, he got 5k from the government and luckily it has increased in value (thanks to the s and p 500) to 42k. So a great deposit.

Hi @BlueMarigold 🖐

@Aslockton that's great that it all got agreed in the end.

Buying a house is such a big adult move! Glad the date was pushed back. Dos Ikea loom?
@BlueMarigold If I recall correctly your DD is a biology student? DS has gone into food sector and one of his friends a lab in a hospital. Just to show the range, another took a year out and is starting a paramedic course in Sept. I have everything crossed she is lucky soon (because truly luck seems to play a huge part in it).

@EwwSprouts yes well remembered! Congratulations to your son for securing a job. DD1 is looking for conservation/ecology based roles.

Good news for this household is that Dd1 has secured a specialist vet internship. Given that there are lots of cutbacks & many places are not taking on interns this year this is one of only two such jobs in the UK. She said if she didn't get one she was going to locum in Australia & look for an internship out there.
The job market for everyone is absolutely diabolical.
Training positions are being cut throughout healthcare. Not just doctors but other healthcare professionals & in veterinary medicine. It's a real advantage to be able to work overseas if you are lucky enough to have a European passport or joint nationality.
Ds1 is graduating this year in sports science. He's no idea what he wants to do & he needs to concentrate on his results with Adhd/dyslexia. We're resigned to DH setting up a job for him in some sort of business.
He's very charming & gets on well with everyone & is actually pretty bright & loves doing up classic bikes.
Not sure what sort of business that will be that ties all those things together 🤔

Great news for dd1 @cantonet! She's done well. I bet you're glad she'll be nearer home than Australia too!

Hope ds1 gets some clarity around jobs/ business ideas too. It really is dire isn't it, so i think they need to be thinking outside the box. Dd really wants to stay in Nottingham, but she also wants to get a studio flat if she does that and I'm doubtful she'll get work that will enable her to afford that. Her boyfriend will be at uni in Nottingham for another 2 years, plus she's very involved at church doing youth and kids work and has loads of friends there. The good thing about going to uni not too far away is that even if she has to come home and do her warehouse job for a while, it's only an hour and a quarter to Notts so she could still be there every weekend.

And great news for ds @Aslockton - hope he settles in quickly. I need to get my kids thinking about setting up a LISA..

It's a conundrum isn't it @crazycrofter?
It's so important to them to be near friends.
Dd1 applied to 2 jobs, the second of which is a large hospital in an area where she has friends. But they're making a decision next month & this current job want her decision in the next few days. She will be working in a small town with lots of sheep farmers & no friends. Working one weekend in two in hospital accomodation for a paltry figure. A far cry from Bristol.
But career wise it's what she has to do.
DH was really sad at the thought of her potentially moving to Australia. He's always encouraged them to travel & work overseas as he's lived in several countries & continents. But he feels differently now he's 72 & wants them near.
Has your DD started applying for jobs yet?
In clinical Psychology?

@BlueMarigoldds1 has a biology degree. He has spent the best part of the last 3 years travelling. He left as a beef farmers son and came home a vegan! He was home last summer, he worked doing bat studies in the evenings, plus worked at the grain company where he used to work the summers when home from uni. After that he went travelling again in October, back home January. He’s been trying to get an ecology job since as they advertise Jan/feb. He’s now secured an assistant ecology position. It’s March to October which is the normal season for ecology jobs. I think he plans to clear off travelling again in October which dh isn’t impressed about.

Well done to your ds1 @icanbewhatiwant.
I think a combination of travelling & working is a brilliant idea. Especially if he wants to stay in ecology.

@Cantonetdh thinks he should work all year round. He doesn’t see why he should live here for nothing then clear off travelling for 4 months when we can’t afford to. He also says he’ll never be able to move out if he’s going to keep travelling. Hopefully he will settle eventually. They did say there might be an opportunity to stay all year if he’s good at the job. I asked Ds if he’d stay if they asked…he said he’s not sure.

You are a long time working @icanbewhatiwant. I read the book 'Die with Zero' and it talks about all the travelling when you are young gives you memories for 60 years and you have your health and youth to fully enjoy it. Whereas, travelling in retirement gives you 15 years of memories (if you are lucky) and your health often stops you. I love it when mine want to travel.

DD had two gap years, one pre and one post uni. She did 'Workaway' and saw the world for next to nothing. 4 months in Germany changed her degree choice and her uni choice and ultimately career choice. DS just worked during his gap year as he had no interest travelling.

@Aslockton yes I agree. Dh on the other hand retired age 60 after working from age 13 he has rarely left the country and has no desire to travel anywhere. He won’t get on a plane, he went on one in 1980 and says never again. So he can’t understand why Ds doesn’t want to settle down and save like he did.

@icanbewhatiwant Fantastic!

@BlueMarigold Just in case she hasn't seen this 6 month role
https://www.wildlifetrusts.org/jobs/events-experiences-assistant-seasonal-spurn-x-2

I feel travel is more important then ever as factions all over become more polarised.

@icanbewhatiwant DD1 did bat surveys as part of her placement year. She is also vegan! I think she needs to start seriously applying for positions now. I will show her the job you sent @EwwSprouts. Thank you for that!

My DS is after conservation jobs too but not pure ecology as he is a bit weaker on the science side, more ranger type work. Or heritage gardens. He is doing all sorts of volunteering but isn't confident/capable enough to go travelling, neither are any of his friends (all ASD/ND). He is enjoying his garden centre work but doesn't want to do it forever especially as it's weekends.

DD and friends are putting a small holding deposit down for a y2 house tomorrow, subject to contracts etc. Unlike the one last week this one is separate tenancies and they don't mind one of them being an overseas student. It's half way between town centre and campus, 10 mins or so each way, good location.

@cantonet the long term aim is still clinical psych, but she needs to get experience for the next two or three years, so she can apply for the (very very competitive) doctorate. Even assistant psychologist roles seem to need experience which she doesn't yet have. She was supposed to be focusing on her degree and worrying about applying for things in June, but she keeps sending me jobs that she's applying for! The thing is, I think most of them would want her to start earlier than June...

Can dd turn this job down if she ends up being offered the hospital job later? It's difficult isn't it, balancing friends/ location and career prospects. I also really don't want my kids far away! It's strange because they've always been very independent and I'm very busy with full time work and supporting dh's church ministry, but I suddenly really miss them! I do think it's partly due to supporting lots of older people at church and realising what your 70s and 80s can look like without family around you. I'm not quite 50 yet though!

That house sounds like a good find @EndlessDistraction

@crazycrofter I know a psych graduate who has pursued that route, she has finally started the PhD this year age 29 after several unsuccessful application rounds, IIRC she started out as an assistant to some sort of therapist and then through a couple of other assistant type jobs while applying each year, it is hard but not impossible.

I moved away after graduation but moved back closer to home when we got married, so DParents are half an hour from us, they helped with childcare when the DCs were young and now it's my turn to help them, but with still supporting DS in particular it is proving really hard. I don't work full time which is just as well but any thoughts of retiring (I'm closer to 60) are on the back burner because I don't want to be available 24/7 to meet the needs of everyone else, selfish though that sounds. I also like my job and colleagues, but do feel a little resentful that DMum retired at 60 with a really good public sector pension and waltzed off round the world for years with DDad as we were fully independent by then and their siblings who stayed local did all the elderly care as Mum and Dad had moved 100s of miles away. Mum and Dad aren't selfish people at all but my goodness they got off lightly. Then mum keeps saying, oh you should travel like we did, and I think, yes, that would be nice.