Thread 43 - GCSE Covid Cohort ..November 22 Remember Remember

[OrangeCinnamonLatte]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had

Previous Thread

@Fiddlersgreen Regarding paying half rent for July & August but not moving in until Sept - we came across that in Bath too. It does seem odd but if it’s the norm… I’m relieved that ds1 & housemates have decided to keep the same house next year. And it’s not one where the above arrangement applies. Which is lucky as he will be staying in Bath for the summer as he has a job with the company he did his placement year with.

I think DS2 will start looking soon.

I’ve just seen some graduation photos for a girl from our town. I know she suffered dreadfully with homesickness & hated her first year - but stuck it out & finished her degree. So there is hope that situations can be endured & made a success of.

We also pay for DDs train ticket home . In fact I ordered it to make sure I got the best ticket for her. Not the cheapest but one she could use for other trains when she missed her train ;-) it was only £5 more. I too saw that thread about whether parents paid or not and found it very interesting.

I reimbursed dd when she came home for reading week, but I didn't pay for her trips to Liverpool and Manchester!

All the houses I've looked at have said half rent for July and August too.

I've said on here before that ds1 waited until December at UEA to look for accommodation. They were told to wait until new year. Everything they viewed in December had either already been let when they arrived to view, or they'd view, get home after and phone the agent to be told it had gone. In the end they all went back to Norwich 2nd Jan in the hope that others would still be with their families for Christmas. They found a place then.

It's ds's 19th birthday Monday. He won't let me send him any money. He says he doesn't want anything. I have done a Tesco delivery for him for Monday. So I'll get alcohol, a cake and some nice food delivered. Only 4 weeks and he will be coming home for Christmas. Apparently he doesn't want anything for Christmas either. So he's not being helpful.

Spoke to DS today. Swim trial went well. He has another trial with timed swims on Thursday so see how that goes. The Firsts training times fall better for his schedule so he’s really hoping he gets in. Had his first exam this week which was pass/fail and it was a pass so he’s very happy with himself. Went to watch a Footlights play as well so busy week!

Interesting one about travel home, DD paid for her train ticket at the start of reading week, and we took her back at the end and of course didn’t ask for petrol money! Hadn’t thought of it that way … I’m not sure she’ll train it home too often though, we’ll take her both directions at Xmas as she’ll have too much stuff with her.

She’s currently in Newcastle for a trampoline competition. They set off at 4 this morning, and she has her main event tomorrow after what promises to be a substantial night out 😬

Aw craggy, sounds lovely, he is living his best life!

DD will pay her own train fare home at the end of each term and if she wanted to return during term time would do the same
She is in a similar position to the OP ‘s DD on the thread that has been mentioned on this one in the sense she has a maximum SL given my household income and a very generous bursary indeed from her university.
I can’t imagine her asking me do so and in honestly was quite horrified at some of the comments on that thread but of course it was posted in ‘AIBU’ where someone folk are at best ‘tone deaf’?

*some folk

We had a good day in Nottingham and dh and ds managed not to embarrass dd too much. Wollaton Park was lovely and we saw the deer close up. Dd got a big Lidl shop out of us as well as lunch and tea so she seemed happy!

Three weeks now until ds comes home!!! I am so excited to see him and to hear his news properly instead of over a breaking up FaceTime call!

He is having the time of his life and has made so many friends. I’m so relieved as I really didn’t think Oxford was the right place for him but I’ve never been so happy to be wrong! He’s met a great bunch of people who he’s really bonded with.

But it’s been a long time since I’ve seen him and I just can’t wait to have my giant 6’3” pfb home again😂😂

@ProggyMat is your dd still having a blast??

She is indeed @ScarlettDarling ! 😊
DD has reservations before she went that she ‘wouldn’t fit in’ as she couldn’t spend all her time studying - her ‘downtime’ has always been spent ‘socialising’
She’s made lots of friends across lots of subjects who are ‘of a similar ilk’ -they had a blast last weekend at the SU ball.
Lots of other stuff planned before EoT including Oxmas.
The time has absolutely flown and as you say only 3 more weeks until they’re home! 😊

I’m taking DS back today (end of reading week). We have had a nice week, it was lovely going back to his school for certificate presentation evening, so pleased he could be here for that.

I want to ask a question of those whose DCs were at, or younger sibling still are at 6th form college (DS stayed at school, DD Y12 is at college now). How much contact is it reasonable to expect as a parent from the college? DS was at special school where there was a LOT of info sent out to parents and the school-student-parent relationship was very close. I am friends with a lot of the other parents in his year (I know this is unusual at secondary). DD went to a small private school where communications were good too and the year group of parents had a whatsapp and got to know each other as there were only 30 or so students in the year.

Now I have got one at uni with no contact to me (expected although I can contact learning support if needed) and one at college again with no parent contact at all (literally all we have had is two emails, one about a trip and one about PSHE content). Because both are small settings I don’t know and can’t talk to any other parents there (RAU has nothing to speak of on StudentRoom or WIWIKAU and none of DD’s existing friends went to her college). Is this usual for 6th form college? I don’t know DD’s form tutor’s name (I only know subject teachers because she gave me a copy of her timetable), there are no staff contact details on the website, no parent portal, no info about parents evenings or exam timings, nothing. I don’t have any particular concerns but do suddenly feel a bit shut off. I have been assured by a parent whose DD previously went there that they will speak to parents if needed but the default seems to be zero communication. Is this normal?

I have DD at sixth form college ED and have had no communication at all - I think that's normal. Hopefully they would be in touch if there were a problem. There is definitely supposed to be a parents evening at some point but no news yet on when. I am getting more communication from the school she has just left, they seem unable to remove me from their Y12 parent contact list!

Yes, at the extremer end of normal. Not saying it's good but it's normal. The tutor probably plays very little role.

@crazycrofter sounds like you all had a good time visiting DD :-) Love that she wanted to see her little brother.

@EwwSprouts You were right about Beeston HC, DD loves it there. They made her feel very welcome. She's played 2 matches (7s 1st game - explained a one off) and then yesterday 5s and is hoping to move up to 4s soon (who she is training with). She knows you sometimes have to start at the bottom at a new club so wasn't too disappointed. She even went back last night to watch Beeston Mens 1s play Nott uni 1s. I asked her who she would be supporting - "Beeston of course, uni can do one" made me smirk :-)
She said how glad she is not playing for uni now as her friends were moaning that every week they are expected to play twice, train twice and socialise twice. That is too much for DD to cope with. Some of her comments may be sour grapes but it's worked out well for her so far. Hope your DS is enjoying his hockey too.

I'm still on the look out for cheap matching PJs (shorts & teeshirt), will keep looking.

DD must be busy as she hasn't sent me her birthday and Christmas wish list yet -usually has done by now. Wonder what she will ask for....

@EspeciallyD That sounds similar to friends experience whose DC went to 6th form colleges rather than school. DD stayed on at school so had loads of contact and website etc, but I do remember friends mentioning how odd it felt not having a clue what was going on now their DC were at college.

@ScarlettDarling & @ProggyMat Great to hear your DC have settled so well. 3 weeks isn't long now is it - When do they go back? DD doesn't officially finish until 17th Dec.

@Heifer DD goes back on 15th January.
She has very short terms of 8 weeks and vacations are 6 weeks.
I think being at home will be a huge contrast to the ‘social whirl’ she’s experiencing at the moment!
That said, academically she’s doing really well and so far is having a healthy balance of ‘work and play’

Are there 3 or 4 terms? DDs course lasts 31 weeks which nicely gives her 4 weeks off at Christmas & Easter - although could be more at Christmas if she doesn't have many exams. One of the benefits of living on the Wirral is that we are so close to Liverpool so DD can carry on her social life when she is home. The students know so many other student from different schools here that whenever they go out they bump into loads of other people they know. DD loves that. - At Nottingham Uni she only knew 1 ofher person and 1 person at Trent so has found that odd. Luckily has made new friends and is therefore keeping up her socliaising although with three 9.00am lectures has scaled it down to clubbing twice per week...

3 terms - they cover a lot of ground in 24 weeks me finks!
I imagine DD will have a fair bit of work to do over Christmas and Easter but will do paid work in the summer holidays.
I think DD has gone to some 9am lectures - don’t think they are compulsory- but she also has Greek and Latin language classes some of which start at 9am.
They’re young though and can hack it?
It’s lovely your DD will be able to catch up with friends from home so close to home- if that makes sense?
DD had a lengthy commute to school so friends are scattered about a lot but I’m sure they’ll arrange meet ups once they’re all home for Christmas,

• has some 9am lectures which are not compulsory but she has attended The language classes are and involve prep beforehand and ‘homework’ afterwards.

Medics at Newcastle have to be back up onJan 5th for their first set of exams, but can then go back home until term starts proper on 16th. DD is trying to persuade DH to go ski-ing that week and take her ‘to keep him company’…

@EspeciallyD - DS stayed at his (state) school for sixth form but barely any parent contact or website stuff.

Hockey sounds great @Heifer. Not too much not too little!

DS finishes 2 December. Can go back to college from 7 jan and term starts 17 jan. I think he will go back 7 jan or soon after for the library access etc.

@Heifer, yes as Proggy said, they go back Jan 15th…can’t wait to have him home for 6 weeks!! He will be going back to his part time lifeguard job when he’s home…I know he’ll have loads of work but he’ll manage to squeeze in a few shifts a week to pay for his holiday time beer money!
He’s looking forward to catching up with all his home friends again and one of his new close friends lives just five minutes away from us so that’s handy too!
@Heifer, your daughter is doing well to manage clubbing twice a week with 9 am starts! My son isn’t one for long lie ins, he’s often said that he thinks sleeping is a waste of time! So he’s coped well with the late nights and early starts but I know a lot of teens struggle.
@ProggyMat so glad she’s having a great time. My son was exactly the same, thought everyone would be all about the studying and was worried there’d be no social life… he was definitely wrong about that😂 . Thank goodness!! Having a laugh is really important when you’re 18 isn’t it?