My dd and dd aged 12 nearly and 13 go to bed when i ask them to mostly at 9 pm on school night- they object but accept need sleep...I remember deciding my own bedtime when older - when is this a good timeto let them decide - suppose i will have to judge it!! -dd would not go to bed at decent hour !! and also - when do you stop going up to say goodnight - ?is it child led-? they do still like it when we go up..which is sweet.what do others do...