The downsides to having three children..

[Mooncupflowethover]

Are there any? I've noticed a lot of 'shall we go for 3' threads just lately...

I'd love 3 but DH say's no, and he's not likely to change his mind either, so perhaps a reality check as to why 3 might not be such a good idea will make me finally content with just the 2

I have 2 and these are some of the reasons I don't want more, some are irrational I know.
Only being able to hold hands with 2
Someone not having a lap to sit on
Some kind of an emergency (like the plane)
Having 3 teenagers
3 lots of driving lessons, uni fees, pocket money etc
Having to run around to 3 lots of clubs, activities, lessons.
I can visualise 2 lots but 3 just makes my head spin.

agree with almost everything everyone has said! the tickets and rooms thing really hacks me off, though for some things it doesnt matter too much as ds2 isnt quite 3 yet.

the only other thing is the ganging up-them against me! even ds2 is starting to do it!

and you no sooner get through telling them all off for something, then you have to do it all again, then again ad nauseum....

but i wouldnt have it any other way.

Cars for 3 in the back...

citroen xsara picasso

predictable but soooo handy

Oh - and needing to buy bread and mild EVERY day.

And, yes, we do have a fridge...

Cars. Laundry. Hotels. Holidays. Air Fares. Money, etc.

But really, time, money and logistics.

With three there are no free evenings. One wants to do gym, one wants to do dance (three different sorts), one wants to do football and rockclimbing. Cubs and Brownies are on the same night in different towns. (Actually, hold that, at one point I had one child in nursery, one at Infants, and one in yr 3 juniors - I thought I was being clever having them all exactly one year apart. The schools were in different towns with 5 minutes between bells) Two of them want to do swimming lessons so the third one does too - so you end up at the pool from 4pm through to 6, sweating buckets, and trying to keep the other two still and quiet whilst they aren't in their lessons.

Weekends are destroyed - you imagined lovely family time, but what you get is at least one sporting/ extra-curricular that clashes with a birthday party. You aren't quite sure who your husband is, as you are usually at opposite ends of the county/ country dealing with one or other child.

Um, and in our case - number three was brain damaged at birth, which made the first few years a bit more complicated...

But we now only two (over) 7 seater cars, and only ever holiday in self catering apartments or camping. We're financially skint, but emotionally rich... probably.

I'd quite like another, (we have the infrastructure now ) but DH has been well and truly fixed and won't countenance a reversal...

All of the above. But we are ttc#4!

thanks Nonomum....tis not on "The List"unfortunately. Looks like we will be in the position of having to either take two cars on holiday again this year or hire a (bigger than my scenic) people carrier.

thankfully we have a local milkman; a bit more expensive than getting it at the supermarket, but well worth the extra.

I hadn't actually considered the uni expenses etc ....hopefully by then tuition fees will be scrapped otherwise they will all have to work for a few years first!!

My SIL says lack of babysitters - neither set of grandparents can cope with all 3 at once (only 11 months between youngest 2). Usually they have to split them and then have the hassle of finding 2 babysitters on the same night.

No chance of Uni for my lot. Have bred hairdressers...

edgar I have to say there is nothing about having three children or two or one or five that puts your career on hold, especially pending school age!

I still worked while all mine were small. However now they are all at school I have no career after being made redundant .

Lackadaisycal, 14 loads a week? how that works is you are washing too much. Are you one of those every-use-towel-washers perchance? If not you need to make the DC rewear once worn stuff. Seriously, I do max 8-9 loads a week.

Anyway. As you were.

Three teenagers, need I say more!

definitley holidays...rooms for five are rare as hens teeth.

bigger car,bigger house, depending on the ages...the school run can be difficult if you have one at primary and another at secondary,depending on how far away from school you are.

other than that absolutely nothing. wish i had three

Still not decided here!!
Fascinating thread though and some brilliant points.
I think if we had another, baby would definately be a pushchair and carseat baby!

LOLLOL EdgarAllenPoll
That is the only thing putting me off having a third.

More kids than hands, when they're crying/ falling over/ generally kicking off.

Trips out have to be carefully planned. Baby in sling? Buggy board? Can the other two be occupied while I feed baby? How far can DS1 walk or do I have to try to attach buggy board to double buggy?

Masses of laundry.

Love it though!!

Orm, when you go on a plane, could you befriend somebody near you who could hold one if there's a crash?

We've found that hotels will allow 5 of us in a family room if we ask . They're still tiny though.

We have 3 car seats in a toyota verso which was on our company car "list" - other one we test-drove was the ford s-max. Any good?

Plane crashes are thankfully rare. Not worth restricting family size just on the off chance.

On the sitting on lap thing, maybe some people just have too small laps? I can easily fit 2 or more children on my lap . I have ample lap space.

We do about 4-5 loads of washing a week for 5 of us, I consider that a lot. we're slovenly (though we like to pretend it's cos we're eco-aware, too much washing and cleaning, bad for the environment....).

And on the university front, our children are less likely to achieve anyway with all that lack of parental attention and focus so that will solve the problem of too many lots of university fees.

actually these days I sometimes look at families of 4 and think "how nice". You get used to the squalor and noise and stress of it all.

ROFL at nonnomum's typo about having to buy mild everyday. Am imagining her relaxing with a nice pint of mild each evening....

That caught my eye too.

To be honest I think the hardest time for me was when DD1 and DD2 were very small (22 months apart) so adding DS into the mix didn't actually make much difference. I think how hard you find three depends on the childrens' personalities. DD1 was (is!) noisy and demanding and so the other two who are calm placid individuals diluted her a bit and actually made her easier to deal with.

My three are all teenagers now and the only downside is that there always seems to be someone taking exams. DD1 will finish her first year at university in a few weeks and I like the way that my nest is emptying gradually rather than them all growing up and moving out within a couple of years.

LackaDaisy - re carseats, look at this - we have one and it is great (apart from the infant seat but its bearable for the amount of time we will use it ).

I had three children and they were born three years apart. The biggest challenge was dividing up cake/ puddings etc for five people when they were older because even my DH wanted his fair share of the food. I loved having three children and they all get on really well and with two girls and the boy in the middle it has worked.

Mine would kill each other in a Multimac, I've looked at it a number of times because it looks perfect as long as you chop their arms and legs off to stop them fighting !

I love having 3, always new we wouldn't stop at 2. Even considering #4 now ....

1 downside I can think of is sometimes needing a bigger car to deal with the carseat situation, depending on ages