The downsides to having three children..

[Mooncupflowethover]

Are there any? I've noticed a lot of 'shall we go for 3' threads just lately...

I'd love 3 but DH say's no, and he's not likely to change his mind either, so perhaps a reality check as to why 3 might not be such a good idea will make me finally content with just the 2

Depends on the ages too - mine are (stepkids X2) age 15 and 16, plus DD age 3 and its pretty easy really - but they take up a lot of room, eat a lot of food and take a lot of cleaning up after, but its great when they are all here. Sooo much quieter when the older ones are at their Mums.

in order to have 3 kids, you have to spend 2 1/4 years of your life pregnant (at least), and give birth three times.

I'm not on to the actual three kids thing yet....but i think this bit is pretty off putting.

OrmRenewed - never thought of the aircrash thing!!

These are great, my yearning for a 3rd has gone from 100% to 90%...

Keep going everyone

The flight thing is Ok though cos with 3 you lose any urge to go anywhere or do anything interesting for a decade or so. With one child we backpacked in Hong Kong and round Australia, with 2 we went to Spain, and with 3 we tottered down to the nearby park now and then.
(am starting to remember more of the downsides now, they were particularly in the early days).
So really you won't be worrying too hard about flight safety.

Also you can be overwhelmed with eco-guilt for your selfish over-population of the planet so you are condemned to camp locally for evermore to reduce your horrific familial carbon footprint.

Do what I did,have your third with a 9 year gap

Usual - I'm 39, a third at nearly 50 would finish me off!!

on the upside, when i have a third, DD will be outnumbered.

on the down side, they'll still be smaller than her.

I expect DS will appreciate an ally in being a Downtrodden Mass though.

But all that time being pregnant means you don't have periods. Is that a plus? It is for me apart from the last 8 weeks........

There's always one who's moaning about something. It's rare that all three are happy at the same time.

am flying to France with 3 for the first time next week, wish I hadn't read this!

I'd rather have the periods. After all, nothing to stop you getting drunk whilst you're on the blob. Or from wearing nice clothes. or doing your shoelaces.

and really, its a full year after giving birth before i get back any vestiges of freedom from the Unholy Tyranny of the small baby (ie, when i feel ok about letting aomeone else put up with them).

haing 3 resets the clock on your freedom, your career (on effective hold pending school age) , your (longed for) retirement

...reduced a couple of % OP?

Edgar...I'm down to about 50% maybe 45% after your last post...you're doing a great job!

Money. Money. Money.

Babies don't cost much, but my God children do!!! Dearer holidays, shopping bills, clothes, SHOES, Christmas, birthdays etc etc etc

I've got sizable gaps in ages with my 3 (10, 7 and almost 3). There's always somewhere that the older 2 need to be, whilst the littlest just gets dragged from pillar to post. I hate that.

Bedrooms. Pain in the arse for two to be sharing (only got 3 bedrooms). I didn't anticipate that they wouldn't actually like sharing.

Time and attention. I always feel that I'm not giving enough quality time to one or another of them. One always seems to be missing out.

All that said, I wouldn't change it for the world. I'm blessed with 3 beautiful girls who I love the bones of.

I have three and love them, obv, love that they are a gang and so far (they are 9, 7 and 4) they get on well and I managed the baby and toddler years without too much knackered craziness. I don't even care about the laundry, but what does get me down is the mess and the logistics - getting from ds2's football to dd's rainbows, throwing sandwiches at them in the back of the car and so on. They are not kids who do something every day after school, but if you have 3 and they each do one or two things a week, then you are running about like a blue-arsed fly and someone is always waiting for the others. Like plonker, i feel I am spread a bit thin between them (I am a SAHM who works part time from home and currently have no help with them or in the house although we used to have an au pair). I wish there were more hours to spend one on one with them. But I always wanted three and I feel tremendously lucky to have had 3 happy, healthy children.

Well it isn't exactly the way I look at life. Not being a frequent flyer It's just one of my big fears.

Being outnumbered.

And it not being financially viable to work anymore, but not financially viable not to.

You cant ask friends for a 'favour'.
Who in his right mind will volunteer to take your 3 for a day out to give you piece?

Also airfares in our case because our families are abroad and we have to visit them.

DD3 is only 7 weeks old. No major drawbacks yet , although middle one is jealous.

No more man-to-man marking. You and DH will have to learn zonal defence.

Also there are far more opportunities for 2 DCs to want something urgently and loudly and simultaneously.

We have had to get a 7 seater car in order to fit in friends back for tea and grandparents visiting us.

Cant think of anything else. 3 is great and they all play really nicely with each other (well most of the time!) I say go for it!

the hours between school and bedtime are hellish; all three tired and hungry and fighting...my god the fighting.

and the laundry, yes yes the laundry. If we miss our usual two loads a day for even one day, it seems to take four days to catch up again; could someone please explain exactly HOW that works???

Same goes for car; if they are all close in age, finding a car that will take three car seats across the back is nigh on impossible. We are having horrendous problems sorting out DH's company car because of this.

the house never ever seems to be clean or tidy as they destroy it all the minute your back is turned; food bills are hideous, the 2+2 family ticket thing, and foreign holidays being a thing of the past....

and yyy to Nonnomum re childcare

BUT on the plus side; life is always hectic and busy, snuggling up with all three of them is lovely, and the family dynamic feels much more settled.

I feel a bit for DS1 though as he was five when DD was born, and then DS2 came along 17 months after that and finding quality time to spend with him one on one is hard.

Wouldn't change it for the world though

Yep - wouldn't change it. Hence considering a fourth... That would really bugger everything up.