hysterical baby at bedtime

[shalaa]

My DS is just over 4 months old and recently when he gets tired he gets hysterical. Screaming, crying and going rigid, it's really upsetting me and DP and my nerves are shot to pieces after 4 screaming episodes today. Is anyone elses baby going through this? The screaming and crying lasts anywhere between 10 & 30 mins and nothing will calm him down. We both try and settle him in different positions, with feeding, rocking you name it but nothing works! He just seems to give up after a bit. Just hoping were not the only ones and it's a developmental thing.

we rang the dr when dd first did this! Know how stressful and upsetting it can be. She still gets like it when overtired, so we just try to read the signs and get her to sleep before she hits the point of no return. The Baby Whisperer has some helpful tips as well.
Maybe ds is overstimulated? try sitting in a darkened room with him with v little noise and movement, just gentle patting.
Good luck!

Hi Nell, we worry he doesn't get enough stimulation!! We try the dark room and being quiet, hopefully he'll grow out of it. Keep thinking were doing something wrong for him to be so upset.

Did have a bit of that. To be honest when we found that rocking and stuff did not sooth baby I just left her alone, and actually I think she just wanted peace and quiet. Weird but oddly human. She would generally settle a little quicker if left alone to cry herself to sleep. Could be overstimulated.

wonde rif ou need a bedtime routine
have you one?
then baby woudl knwo whats coming

Hi FF,

I wondered that as well, we try and put him to bed at the same time everynight and he always goes in his sleeping bag. Think it is because i've not really got a routine, anyone know of a flexible routine as I don't want to be too rigid.

Hi there - my first did this a lot (and will still go a bit hysterical when overtired.) I know how upsetting it can be. The thing that I found most helpful was to regulate her sleep with a schedule (making sure that she was tired but not too tired- so it was usually at least a couple of hours between previous nap and bedtime, and also to have a consistent bedtime routine of bath, story and bed.
HTH.

shalaa.. i have a flexible routine with ds.

because he is fed on demand it's harder to have a proper routine i find

we do bath, supper, last bottle and then bed.

before he was weaned we would give him his bath about 45mins before his last feed was due (although obv couldn't pinpoint it THAT exactly)

so say bath at 8ish. nice towel dry and powder and some no nappy time. Then babygro on and just sit and have a nice cuddle with me or DP until he was ready for his last feed. I would give him the feed in his room with lights low... then put him in cot!

timing isnt really an issue, more the order things are done in. food, then bath, then story, then bed. Then, if ds is tired, drop the story or bath once in a while. Also, always saying the same thing as you leave the room eventually comforts them as they come to expect it.
Good luck with everything, and remember ds is still v small and just beginning to exert himself, sounds like you have quite a strong and stubborn character on your hands

Hya,
my dd (4/5 months) used to do this on a regular basis. For a few weeks I put her into a strict routine for bedtime, where possible I tried to do it an hour and half before 'kick off time' I started with a bath, a rub down, feed, then let her kick about. Then I had a final cuddle in the dark bedroom, and sat with her until she started to drop off. Took patience (something I'm not good with)- but it paid dividends, now we're much more flexible, some nights we have a bath, rub down etc, other nights not. The only thing I keep the same is the night time cuddle. If we're going to have a late night, I try to ensure she gets plenty of naps. and then follow the normal routine.

I also found it helped if she had a nap (20 mins) about a hour before bedtime as this helped with the 'overtiredness'.

It is horrid, but I promise it won't last forever, good luck,

Thanks for all your replies! Helps alot to though that others are going/gone through this. Yes he does seem very strong willed, god help me when he becomes mobile!! Am going to instigate a flexible routine regarding naps and night time. He's bf on demand so feeding will always be as and when he wants for now. Will see how things go!

(madrose, up for meeting on friday??)

Does he go to sleep after the crying? Our ds did this, and to be honest we let him so long as we were sure that there was no reason for it (hungry, wet etc) it's easier when you really get to know his crying pattern - we got so that we could predict the moment he would go to sleep.

We also used swaddling and loud rythmic music (supposed to be like the womb) and these helped too. However I think he only did it in the evening (ds now 6). Dd on the other hand could cry for what seemed like hours with very little effort, and that really drove us mad! (She liked to be carried around and rocked all the time, in the end we had her sitting on dh's jiggly knee whilst he played computer games for hours...)

do bath wuiet feed in dar k room
baby massage at some pount and hten bed not talking or lookng at baby
do not tr y to go down stairs or into a noisy room